I Think My TV's Broken
by Exhale Vanilla Lace
Summary: Let's face it Yukari's life sucks. She's been disowned, hated, and now her only purpose for living is dead. Her T.V.'s kinda broken so let's drag her and her friend into Naruto World and see just how messed up her life can get!
1. Fallen Angel

_**A/N: **__Okay so my tale begins! MUHAHAHA! It starts kind of sad and slow but trust me, once it starts rolling it will get better!_

_**Disclaimer: **__I really, really, really want to own Naruto but sadly I don't! So SORRY!_

_**Chapter 1**_

_**Fallen Angel**_

_**(It's colder without you… my sister…)**_

_It was growing dark and I could hear their whispers. They're words carried across town in the winds that had obviously betrayed me. If they thought I wanted to hear, they were terribly wrong. Their voices danced through my mind; accusations and pity held in their eyes as their gazes burned through the back of my jacket. None of them mattered, not anymore, all that mattered now was that I was alone._

_My world was gray, like a black and white movie gone wrong. Color seeped into shading adding to the depressing atmosphere. The funeral had only just ended, and yet I was the only one left at her grave. _

_We had buried her next to my parents, those bastards. They didn't deserve the company in death. My wounds were still fresh from his hands, my fathers. Perhaps he was the only one I truly despised. My mother had always been kind, yet there was so little I remembered of her. She had left us when I was four, simply runaway. I'd ask why, but I already knew, it must have been because of dad. She had died only 3 years after. Police found her remains burned in her car in what was supposedly a car crash, but I had always known otherwise. My mother had been murdered long before my dad put her corpse in the car, and burned the evidence._

_I went to her funeral as well. _

_I hardly ever cried, I cried when they told me my brother had died, I cried the first time father hit me, but her death was the last time I cried. 6 years and not a tear to show for it. _

_We were a dead family, doomed before we started._

_And now that my sister was gone, my sweet baby sister, I felt guilty that I couldn't cry for her as the sky itself seemed to weep for the loss. Damn these eyes of mine, why won't they work?! She deserves my tears, she deserves to have someone grieving, and since I was all that she had… how sad that I couldn't even do that for her. Just like I couldn't protect her from our stupid drunken father. She could have lived, it was my entire fault._

_**FLASHBACK**_

"_You little wretch!" he screamed his fist landing in my jaw. The metallic taste of blood was in my mouth and I fought the urge to spit it back at him. "That's right you little bitch just stay down!" But I rose, shakily and battered, but I rose. "WHY DO YOU KEEP GETTING UP?" I refused to answer instead I kept a miraculously blank face and stared back at him with hollow eyes. _

"_Don't look at me like that!" he hit again. I was more then capable of dodging his blows, they were slow, but what was the point? If he couldn't beat on me, he'd find someone else; Maya for example. A faint smile crossed my lips as I remembered she didn't even know. She was too young, too innocent, and far too gullible. "You ungrateful whore! You think you can just walk around like you own the place! I own the place, damn it! You don't even live here anymore!" My smile widened into a grin, a half insane grin spurred by his words and the blood dripping form the corners of my mouth. _

"_You're right, I don't live here anymore, you disowned me a year ago Father." I wasn't even too sure what happened when you disowned someone. All I knew was that there was a cigarette burn where I should have been on my family tree and that I certainly wasn't welcome in my house anymore. "I just came to visit my beloved sister." I elaborated. _

_He barred his teeth, and I got a sick pleasure out of his frustration. He reached down picking up a broken beer bottle from the kitchen floor. _

"_Bitch, I'll teach you to talk back to me!" Again I didn't move, it was difficult for every fiber of my being was trying to act on instinct as it had done so many times to keep me alive on the streets. It didn't happen as often since I took solace in the woods a few miles down the road. It was there that I envied those from Naruto anime were they could simply jump up and I had to climb. But you get used to it. My fighting has kept me alive, my fathers rage has gotten me out of the hell hole of a house, and my sister has given me a reason to live. All in all I'd have to say my life wasn't too bad, seriously. I had a purpose and as long as I had my purpose, I could take anything…_

_Every time my father got drunk I would always prevent Maya from finding out. If anything were to happen to scar her amazing purity I would be heartbroken. And even now the pain was weak as my blood fell from my shoulders. Oh, and now from my stomach, okay that one hurt a little more. _

_I bent over double clutching my abdomen in pain and gasping for breath. And yet, all I wanted to do was make him angrier, feed that hate inside me with sweet satisfaction._

"_Maybe you should go lie down __**Father**__, you look dreadfully tired." I suggested smirking. _

"_You are no daughter of mine!" He raised the bottle farther and I don't think it quite registered how fatal the next blow was meant to be. For instead of looking at him I looked at the doorway. There stood Maya, thousands of emotions flitting across her face while mine finally adopted a look of panic. _

_She rushed to my aid and clumsily knocked his hand aside._

"_MAYA! What are you doing! Go back to bed!" but she looked at me like I was crazy._

"_What's going on!? Why is father acting so? Daddy could have killed you!" She sobbed tears falling from pale blue eyes, so unlike mine. I felt my heart soften, it was impossible to be cruel with her around._

"_Maya, it's okay." I tried placing a hand tenderly on her cheek. "Just go back to bed. And no buts about it! You're ten, I'm thirteen! I still get to boss you around! Respect your elders!" I replied sternly, seeing she was about to protest. _

"_Almost thirteen." She corrected, but what I saw in her eyes almost broke me. I saw so much love and trust in those glittering blue eyes that I almost shattered right there. "Alright Yuki, but be careful." She smiled sweetly, that warm smile as she used my nickname._

"_I will I, promi" But I would never finish that sentence. Maya's breath hitched and I saw blood pour rapidly out of her stomach where my bastard father had cut ruthlessly into her back. _

_For a moment all was still, her eyes wide like my own, her blood staining my clothes. She fell to the floor twitching slightly. I was in shock as I looked back into the demonic face of my dad._

"_DON'T GET IN THE WAY!" He slurred brandishing his bottle at Maya. "I OWE THAT BITCH A LIFE WORTH OF PAIN! AND NOW MY OWN DAUGHTER COMES TO HELP HER! YOU LITTLE TRATORUOS WHORE! I'LL KILL YOU BOTH!" he charged._

"_I rather think not!" I spat. _

_I kicked the bottle out of his hands and hit him hard in the stomach with a flat palm. I'll admit, I learned most of my moves from anime, but since I didn't have charka of heck even spirit energy to use the moves properly I put a hell of a lot of force behind them instead. It targeted the muscles with clear pain inflicting and hell every now and then I throw a rib braking hit for kicks. It's a mixture of my acquired street fighting and anime style! It was a suggestion from… Maya. My eyes flashed with hate at the thought and I saw red, suddenly all I wanted was him dead. _

"_You mother fucking bastard!" I kicked him hard in the gut and he went down. I brought my knee up to meet him and send him flying only to have my elbow bring him crashing down again. I smirked as he choked up blood. "I'll make you pay! No one touches Maya!" I hissed a hind of insanity touching my voice as I picked up the forgotten bottle. _

"_An eye for an eye." I knelt behind him. _

"_A life for a life." I brought it to his throat. _

"_I won't regret it!" In a daze I brought the blade across his neck. And as though my father wasn't lying dead on the floor, I rushed over to Maya._

_I turned over her body and held her close. "Yuki, Yuki you're alright." She sighed, the smallest of smiles lighting up her face. I tried to smile back but mine was weaker then hers. _

"_I'm fine Maya, we're both fine. He'll never hurt you again! I promise! We're both gonna be fine!" Even though I said it, I knew she was dying, I knew since her blood had first stained my black tank top. I stroked her blond hair while biting my lip to fight back hysteria. _

"_Yuki I don't think I'm gonna make it. You know it too don't you. I'm t-ten, n-not stupid." She shuddered continuously._

"_Don't be silly Maya, there's no way you're gonna die!" I insisted. _

"_Yuki, I-I love you Yuki, never forget me. P-Promise me Yuki! You'll never f-forget m-me?" Her eyes glittered with hope as she peered into my own crimson orbs._

"_Of course Maya, never, I promise." She smiled at me, the last time I'd see that sweet smile and her eyes glazed over her body becoming limp. I leaned down and kissed her forehead. _

"_I love you too… Maya."_

**END OF FLASHBACK **

I lowered my head as I walked through the graveyard, allowing sheets of my drenched black hair cover my face. Small crunching sounds under my black boots came from far too early fallen leaves and I was still unaware of how cold it had become through the storm. Another crack of thunder sounded and still I walked; the house was mine now, so I'd go there I guess.

It was Friday… Maya and I… Dad would always go out on Fridays and get drunk at some godforsaken bar, while I'd go over and watch T.V. with Maya. It didn't take us long to become totally obsessed with Naruto. Of course we also liked: Yu Yu Hakusho, Inuyasha, Full Metal Alchemist, Slayers, and Wolfs Rain. But Naruto was still the best. So we liked anime, so what!? I'd be dead by now if I hadn't trained myself in anime fighting arts. For example, I once used Kakashi's 'one though sand years of pain' on the most annoying little bastard in the world! Ya that may sound funny now, but trust me it works! And I had 5 solid years of obsession to learn these all too!

I stopped at the steps to their… to my house.

'Happy birthday, to me…' I opened the door to find the place sorrowfully dark. 'Happy birthday to me.' The a few steps led me to the living room were my T.V. sat, nice flat screen, don't ask me were I got the money, if your against stealing, I'm sure you won't like the answer. My birthday gift to Maya. It was a wonder she wasn't a spoiled brat. An old couch made of some fuzzy blue fabric was the sitting area, what had I named it. At one point in time as a child I became obsessed with naming things; unfortunately this was around the same time that I picked up swearing like a sailor. But I didn't want to rest just yet. I walked past, what was it again? Ah, yes, now I remember, 'god damned sofa,' to the kitchen.

An eerie silence plagued these walls, and I knew it always would, because this was the room. The blood I had thought surely would stain had already come off the tiled white floors but to me they were still there, fresh as ever.

"_MAYA! What are you doing! Go back to bed!"_

It replayed in my mind. Should I have been more forceful?

'_I'm fine Maya, we're both fine. He'll never hurt you again! I promise! We're both gonna be fine!'_

I had already known, why had I denied it? Could I have saved her even then?

"_Yuki I don't think I'm gonna make it-"_

'Should I have paid more attention to father while she spoke to me?' I walked over to the cabinets.

"_Yuki, I-I love you Yuki, never forget me.-"_

'Should I have come that night at all, to make such a promise as she died in my arms?' In a daze I opened the Raman and poured it into the bowl.

"_- I promise."_

'Was there a way I could have stopped this? Could this have been avoided?' I don't even remember starting the microwave…

"_I love you too… Maya."_

"Maya," I whispered. "Was there a way I could have saved you…"

**RING! **

I jumped half a mile looking around in a paranoid way.

**RING! **

THE PHONE! 'My god I'm finally loosing it. We all knew it would happen one day.' I permitted myself a light smirk.

"Hello?" I asked. My voice was horse, but hell at least it was manageable.

"YUKARI-CHAN!" I winced at the volume and held the phone a good two feet away from my head. I wasn't positive what my friend had to say at this point, but I was certain it would involve tears, sympathy, and most of all… more yelling. "I JUST GOT BACK! ARE YOU OKAY?! I CAN'T BELIEVE I WASN'T HERE! ARE YOU ALRIGHT????!!!!!!"

'Yep,' I confirmed. 'she's louder then ever.' "Hn, calm down Kanoke, I'm fine." I tried. Kanoke had been away traveling; god only knows where that kid goes half the time and she'd only returned now after a month when she found out. It was only three days since… let's call it the incident kay, had happened and I just got out of jail from questioning.

"Are, are you sure. Cuz I'll come over there if you need a shoulder to cry on." You had to be in the same room as me or at least be good with emotions to tell my laugh was hollow.

"No, no you need to talk to Tanner, he'll be even more upset when he finds out." Yanner would be devastated… I did not want to be the one to tell him. I did not know if I could bare to witness his tears.

"Hey, Kanoke… I was thinking of disappearing for a while." I told her honestly. Normally I'd tell no one, but Kanoke was an orphan and the closest thing to a friend I've allowed myself to have. Maybe… "Could you, watch the place for me?" I had to get out of this house, if I kept seeing her death everyday of my already pointless life I'd go insane. I'll ask myself again, 'Now that Maya is gone, what is my purpose? Why do I insist on living?' But I had yet to get an answer.

"Are, are you sure?!" She sounded shocked, no surprise there.

"Of course, it'll get you out of that crumby orphanage and hell you deserve it!"

"Yukari! I.. I… I'm coming over there right now!" She squeaked.

…_. Dial tone…_

I sweat dropped. That wasn't exactly the reaction I had hopped for, now I had to actually talk to people again. Boy that didn't sound appealing. But I suppose if it was anyone, I'm glad it was Kanoke. Bouncy, emotional… how in the world did I befriend my opposite?

That's a damned good question. The answer: She was being picked on by some thugs and well… I just wanted to cross the fucking bridge! REALLY THAT'S ALL! But no, they just wouldn't move! So I beat the crap out of them. Ah good old violence. Truth is I didn't even know why they were blocking the bridge at the time, just that they were in my way. Kanoke had followed me around since then, like a lost puppy or something. And here we are three years later!

'This Raman is really good.' I noted checking the package. 'Huh, who'd of thought, chicken. It's so plain… not bad.'

Violent knocking on the door made me almost chock on a noodle but I managed to survive and compose myself before opening it. Bright pink eyes glimmered confusingly at me with an odd mixture of sadness and joy. 'How the hell?' I wondered.

"YUKA!" Kanoke flung her arms around my neck and held me in a dead hug. I'll admit it, I'm short for my age, and Kanoke was a year younger then me. I'll also admit, I'm 5 foot 1. And again I'll admit that Kanoke and her the 5 foot 5ness that was her was crushing me. She began to sob despite the fact that she was already soaking wet, I guess we both missed Maya. With that thought I let her slowly to the sofa and let her settle.

It was then that she pushed something into my arms that I hadn't noticed her come in with. One was a box wrapping in red paper with a tiny bow and the other was a tub of ice cream. I looked at her letting a brief bit of confusion cross my face through the calm exterior.

"For your birthday." She smiled cheekily and the corners of my own mouth twitched. I patted her sopping, light lavender hair in thanks, which mudt have look rather hilarious considering our height difference, and pocketed the package. "You and your stupid traditions Yuka. Can't you just open the gift before the Ice cream?"

Yuka was Kanoke's nickname for me. She had wanted to use Yuki but after she met Maya she felt guilty somehow, like she was stealing the word and changed after only a few times.

"Huh," I remarked thoughtfully. "I suppose I could, but why bother? That would be like me taking off my jacket while indoors, simply because we were indoors. It seems rather pointless to me." I shrugged it off and she rolled her eyes.

"Everything seems pointless to you." She laughed.

"So… how are you holding up?" I sighed and she looked at me in shock. "One of us had to ask sooner or later." I replied. She bowed her head.

"I'm… managing. You?"

"Ditto." I responded, despite Kanoke being my friend she too had formed a close connection with blue eyed angel. A long moment of silence passed, uncomfortable, most silences didn't bother me, I didn't really talk much, but for some reason this one did.

"So…" I stated. "No cake?" She raised her eyebrows at me. "What? I happen to like cake." I defended, for another long moment all was quiet, then Kanoke broke out in a fit of laughter. I looked at her for a moment and soon I too found myself laughing. True the cake thing hadn't been that funny. But we had never been laughing for that reason. We were laughing through pain, understanding, and heartache. And it wouldn't stop. I don't know for sure how long it lasted but Kanoke was crying, either from mirth or from sadness I couldn't say, and I had no intentions of asking.

"Your ice cream's melting." She sniffled and I gave one last small chuckle before pulling a spoon out of absolutely nowhere and 'digging in.'

"Mmm…" I closed my eyes and drowned in its sweet cookies'en cream flavor. When I heard Kanoke turn on the T.V. "Kano?" I opened an eye.

"How is nothing on, on a Friday?" She marveled.

I grunted still not removing the spoon from my mouth.

"OH YA!" She said. How she understood me, I may never know. "You're right. Naruto comes on tonight!" She clicked the small button in the menu labeled with the animes' name while I took another bite. I blinked twice forgetting momentarily about the ice cream in my mouth and stared at the screen. It was completely red. Just red with a small black dot in the middle.

"Tch. Rip off." I mumbled pulling out the empty utensil and walking up in front of the giant flat screen. Kanoke came up beside me and started poking the Television.

"Hey what's wrong with it? You've seen almost all of Naruto and know it by heart right? Well dose an epi. start like this?" She asked. I shook my head. "Well then what's wrong with it?! I'm starting to get anime deprived!" She exclaimed poking it harder.

Something stirred in the back of my mind as I watched her and I did my best to stomp down the really bad feeling I was getting. It only got worse as the black dot steadily got larger till it engulfed half of the screen.

"I. WANT. NARUTO!" She yelled, clipping each word as though they were independent sentences. I blinked twice again as words appeared in the dots center.

"Kano." I said trying to get her attention. "Kano!" I twitched, she was still rambling. "KANOKE!" I growled smacking her sharply on the back of her head.

"huh?" And indeed she did look. There written in carefully made white letters, it asked a question.

_Are You Sure?_

Kanoke cocked her head to the side as she stared. I became alarmed, I knew that clueless look, but I was too late to stop her and before I could throw my hand over her mouth she answered it!

"Of course we're sure! What kind of dumb station are you, ESPN?"

'Now that was unfair.' I thought. 'What did she have against ESPN?'

_Do You Want It Bad Enough?_

"What are you trying to pull? We've been sitting here for 10 minutes and you have showed me jack! How bad do you think we want it?!"

'We?' I thought. 'Were was this we coming from? If she wanted to talk to my T.V. good for her, but leave me outta this!'

_Very Well…_

I felt the hairs raise on the back of my neck.

"What the heck are you talking about!"

I twitched again. "Kanoke. Stop talking to it!" I demanded. But the damage was already done. Black arms reached out from the screen itself and wrapped themselves around my shoulders, dark fingers biting harshly into my wounded shoulder and pulling a strangled gasp from me. And then they were pulling me in, and I couldn't move, couldn't think through the pain and the memoried it triggered of Maya and my father. Kanoke watched in horror before she too latched on and followed me into darkness.

**A/N: **Alrighty then! Into Naruto world they go! Sorry if the beginning was kind of slow but there was a hell of a lot of history to explain and I'm still not really finished. (Sigh) Oh well! Hey if you guys want to give me ideas of couples that'd be great. I'm pretty sure for Yukari but I want you to tell me first. And I've no clue for Kanoke.

**Next Time on Fuck, I Think My TV's Broken, **Dizziness and dreams, disbelief and nicknames, Blood and silence, and tears and angels, and… wait a minute… where the hell is Kanoke!? Next Time In Chapter 2. **Blood Written Walls** PLEASE REVIEW! ^-^ Haha


	2. Blood Written Walls

_**A/N: **__Alright this chapter is a little weird but I felt the burning urge to update. Please excuse my terrible spelling, I really am bad at it! Don't be too freaked out by what happens, I really don't know where my ideas come from they're just… there! Haha. But I have to get off the internet cuz my sister was just in a car accident and we need the phone line open for updates._

_**Disclaimer: **__I do not own Naruto, soon my precious, soon… MUHAHAHAHAH!_

_**Chapter 2**_

_**Blood Written Walls**_

_**(No ones going to believe me, hell I wouldn't believe me)**_

_I groaned arching my back slightly as I awoke. My position was extremely uncomfortable; something sharp and annoying was prodding at my back, by the ach it gave me I'd probably been on it for about an hour. But other then that I must be sleeping sitting up. _

_I shifted again with my eyes closed and reached behind me. 'Tch, no wonder I was uncomfortable, I was sleeping on a rock.' I thought closing my crimson eyes again and trying to go back to sleep on the grass…_

'_Wait… grass? Am I, outside?' I blinked my eyes open, curiosity winning over my exhaustion. I inhaled deeply and was met with a sweet scent, Sakura petals. I looked up to see the Sakura tree itself still in full bloom with hints of dew dripping lightly off the edges. The effects of the water and the early sun that hovered overhead made it shimmer and glisten in its beauty._

_I glanced down at myself. I was still wearing my black trench, that's probably why I wasn't cold. I still had my black tank top on with fishnet to cover my exposed stomach, and my black cargo pants. My black hair hung down despite the many hair ties on my wrists. I was still in my funeral attire, as it would appear. _

_My hand flew to my throat where it met the cool surface of stone. A ruby necklace layered twice over so that it looked thick like a choker at my neck then doubled around and came low to rest the gem itself just above my chest. It was my early birthday gift from Maya. The last day I had visited she had given it to me knowing I wouldn't be able come back for a while. As a result it naturally never left my throat._

_A small sigh escaped my lips. 'Where the hell am I?' I wondered silently. Had I ended up in the woods dispite what had occurred? Subconciously walking myself back to where I felt safest? My back told me I'd been here an hour, the suns rising form told me something closer to 9 hours. Now I never slept that long, ever. It was, considering my lifestyle, dangerous to do so. But the last thing I remember is… _

'_MY T.V.' I thought a small growl escaping my lips. 'Kano started talking to my fucking T.V. and then those damned arms came out and pulled me in.'_

_I was one who trusted my eyes and instincts, it had been no dream, that's what they were telling me. They were also telling me that something was watching me. An eerie feeling I've only ever read about in books. Normally it didn't feel like this to be watched, the awareness was accompanied with something far more unfamiliar. But when I looked in what I was sure to be its direction, concealed farther in trees of green, nothing was there, nor did anything stir the leaves so slightly I'd have seen the breath._

_I resigned to the fact that I'd have to find out were I was first. I turned my head right and was met with an impressive crack easing in a painful way the stiffness. But the relief was brief as right in my line of vision barely a foot away, was a persons face. My eyes widened and Gasping I jumped backwards pulling out a not so well hidden knife in my panic. 'Holy shit!'_

"_Oops, did I wake you up!? I didn't mean to! I just wanted to see who you were!" He explained in an almost scared tone. _

_Now I'm not stupid, quite the opposite in fact, I'd recognize that face anywhere. A face Maya had become obsessed with and the same face that I teased her about every chance I got. Blond hair, blue eyes, orange clothes… 'Naruto?' of course I didn't say that out loud, not stupid remember? _

"_I've never seen you before." He commented tapping his chin thoughtfully. "I'm Uzumaki Naruto! Who are you?!" He was back to shouting. But it wasn't me that was scared, it must have been him, did he think I was going to run away or call him names? Had I not known fully well his past I'm sure I'd have simply thought him a fool but the fact was I did know, I knew everything. Except why the FUCK I'm HERE!_

"_No, no, huh. It's okay, you startled me, I was sleeping, ya, good spot for a rest." I replied slowly lowering my weapon._

"_Sorry again, it's just sitting there, you looked kinda like angel or something." He smiled sheepishly._

_I raised my eyebrows, 'that'd be a pretty good pick up line if he used as such. Baka doesn't even realize it.' I thought. And it had been true, under the first light and dew of the Sakura tree I had looked like an angel, granted the angel of death considering my funeral attire… which kinda killed the compliment… _

"_Hey could you by any chance direct me to the Hokage I think I might have a problem." I replied thankful it hadn't come out in a squeak. He brightened up instantly._

"_Sure." He nodded happy to help. Or maybe just happy that I hadn't yelled at him yet. "Um…"_

"_Oh! Yukari, Irenara Yukari. And you're Uzumaki Naruto, correct?" Fuck, I'm squeaking again!_

"_That's me, Uzumaki Naruto! Future Hokage. believe it!" He stood up. "So what kind of problem you got?" He asked casually walking while I followed._

"_just a little tweak that's throwing me off schedule." I replied. 'waaay off scedual.' I thought._

_Looking ahead I noticed the Mount Rushmore of Hokage. It had only four heads, I realized. _

"_Hey, are you a ninja?" I asked perhaps a bit more abruptly then I would have liked._

"_Ya ya believe it! We're all meeting tomorrow as genin at the academy! I'm a butt whooping ninja!" He laughed._

'_Tomorrow.' I thought. 'This is so close to the beginning! He's not even on team 7 yet!'_

"_What about you Yukari? Are you a ninja?" Naruto asked. By now I could see the building, I must have been close to begin with, or was this just a freaky Naruto world thing? Any who, I had regained my composure and decided against letting myself be too well known. Too much had happened this week. Give me credit._

"_Such information Naruto is well guarded for me." I said, sticking my hands in my pockets. "You've noticed I'm not from around here. I am a fighter of sorts yes. I can defiantly hold my own in battle but I am not quite classified as a ninja. You know?" But by the clueless expression on his face I'd have to wager that a 'no.' "I'll tell ya later." I finally reasoned, sweat dropping. _

_He nodded in acceptance of that answer and I moved my hands to find two things I had forgotten about. The gift from Kanoke and something that made this whole thing even funnier then it already was._

_We walked into the building with me throwing careful glances towards him. This was too weird. But what worried me most was 'what happened to Kanoke?' "Is this it?" I asked as we arrived in front of a set of huge double doors._

"_Yea, old man Hokage should be inside." He answered. He turned ready to leave but I closed my eyes with a smirk._

"_Hey," He turned his head. 'There's that clueless expression again, oh Maya if only… ' "Thanks, you saved me out there, really you did. And I hardly ever need help but I feel I owe ya for your troubles." I pulled it from my pocket peeking open my eyes to see his reaction. He was about to protest when he saw what it was. His eyes grew as big as… well dinner plates honestly._

"_No way." He whispered. "NO WAY! YOU ARE AN ANGEL!" He leapt at it and I resisted the urge to pull it back at the last second to get a laugh. _

_I twitched, he was now cuddling it. _

'_Geeze it's just a ticket for free Raman.' Then again I had seen him eat Raman before, why was I so surprised? 'Tch, I feel like a stalker, I know too much!' I was chuckling to my surprise but it made Naruto realize exactly what he was doing and stop to smile sheepishly. _

"_THANK YOU!" He shouted at last._

"_See ya round Orange Man." I nodded before walking through the doors. Maybe I should have knocked first but right now I was mentally looking for where I had gotten that name._

_**FLASHBACK**_

"_Maya loves Naruto. Maya loves Naruto!" 8 year old Maya chased me around the room. She stopped to chuck a purple pillow from my bed at me. I caught it and threw it back. It became a pillow toss from me to her till finally she thought better of her actions and didn't throw it back. Instead she charged me. _

'_That's my girl, I thought proudly, 'always thinking.' I smiled softly even as she whacked me over my stomach with it. She was laughing, music to my ears and I grinned grabbing the pillow and yanking from her causing her to flail her arms before toppling over. "Tell ya what kiddo, if we ever meet up with Orange Man I'll hook you up kay." I dropped the pillow on her head._

"_So you know I like Naruto, but… who do you like from it." She asked peeking out from underneath the cushion. _

"_Tch, like I'm gonna give that kind of ammo away." I laughed. She gasped scrambling to sit at my heels while I myself settled on the bed. _

"_So you do like someone from Naruto! Who, who, who! Kakashi, Lee!?" She asked excitedly. "Tell me!" She cried. I smirked down at her._

"_Keh, bushy brows? The old jonin? You're not really giving me good choices." I scoffed. Though Kakashi was pretty smexy…_

"_PLEASE!" She begged putting on a puppy dog face. She was really good at that face, her eyes held such sincerity I'd truly have to be heartless to say no to that. _

"_Okay I'll tell you, enough with the face," I caved and she climbed to my side quickly. "Okay it's…_

**END OF FLASHBACK**

I looked up to see the Hokage himself pipe and all just sitting there talking to his grandson. 'Konohamaru.' I registered. 'Yep, I'm defiantly a stalker.'

"I've got Naruto! He beat my old trainer like it was nothing! You wait Gramps! I'll be Hokage one day, after I beat Naruto I'm coming back for you." The Sandaime didn't dare smile though his eyes twinkled as he wished to do so. A smile might provoke the little guy into a tantrum about how he wasn't being taken seriously. Konahamaru never noticed me approaching with silent steps though I saw the Hokages eyes flicker over to me.

The kid paused for breath and I took my chance.

"Lord Hokage." I said softly. The boy turned to me with a, 'huh' and his grandfather was now free to give me his attention. I didn't smile, the conversation I was trying to play out in my head as I would say it, was not going well, hell I didn't believe myself! "I have important information," I glanced tentatively at the boy. "things not for children's ears." I said. He nodded in understanding. That at least I was grateful for.

"Konahamrau," he addressed. "If you would,"

"Yeah yeah yeah! I get it old man! I'm going!" He was about to pass me but I grabbed the cloth on his back; A concealment cloak wrapped in a bundle. I swear I could see the Hokage tense though he didn't make a move.

"Hey kid," I whispered. "Remember to keep the stripes vertical in fence concealment, could save your life some day." I smirked and let go. Turning back to the Hokage I saw raised eyebrows but he beckoned me to come forward. And so I did. And just when we were alone and the door clicked shut I completely lost it.

"I need help! I don't know if it's physical or mental or whatever! You can pick one for all I care! I've gone insane haven't I!? That's it isn't it!? Maya's gone and now I'm insane! There's no way I'm in another world! No fucking way! It's been screwing with my instincts too! Do you have any goddamned idea how annoying that is!?" I seethed. His eyes widened.

"Calm yourself."

I twitched, I didn't want to calm myself. I wanted to scream my fucking head off, but then I looked at him again and was hit with such a pang of guilt as I realized he was still alive. I had seen his death, I don't know how many times, but he was so calm, so kind, that I quieted, for that sake only.

"Now tell me what's going on."

"I'm in a coma aren't I? Too much blood loss probably. Yeah that makes sense." Hey I said I quieted, not that I came back fully. But I sighed, 'I should probably answer.' "Alright, ever since I got here, I been thinking of a good way to tell someone this, and well let's face it, there is no good way. So I'm just gonna come right out and say it. I'm from another world, dimension if you please. You can call me insane, cause I probably am. Yukari, by the way, Irenara Yukari. Huge fan Sandime-sama. I came from a world of technology, beautiful beautiful technology. But fuck, for all you know I came from the world of prancing unicorns and happy little rainbows." I paused. "Shit I don't sound very convincing do I? You don't have to believe me. I wouldn't blame you if you had me locked up this instant. Hell I wouldn't even blame ya if you stuck a kunai in my heart right now, I wouldn't complain either. I mean who wants to live in a coma? That's just depressing." I ranted. I stopped, 'huh, done already?'

"Now, Yukari was it?" he asked and I nodded numbly. I knew I'd done a shit job explaining, I was just waiting for the kunai I knew had to be aimed at my chest. "I believe you."

I almost died. Really?

"You have no headband, you're not from around here, and no spy would let themselves get caught by Naruto only to make up such an unbelievable story. And you look like you're telling the truth. Such spirit." He chuckled. He had other reasons, even I could see that but he didn't look like he was gonna tell me. Who cares? I was still in shock that he believed me. "The question is, were do we go from here? I'd like to have you carefully watched, you understand. If you're around the young of this village it would be irresponsible of me if I did nothing at all. But most of my Jonin's are taking on squads for now. What should I do? You say you are not a ninja correct?" He looked almost hopeful.

"Well no, but I could probably hold my own against a Genin or something. Maybe a Chunin… maybe." I lied. I didn't know if I could hold my own. I was fast, really fast, but was I ninja fast? I couldn't jump from trees; that defied gravity in my world, could I do it here? I certainly couldn't do ninjustsu or genjutsu. I knew all the hand-signs, really I did! I was obsessed with 'Naruto!' But that didn't mean I had enough charka to do them. I pictured myself walking up a tree only to fall flat on my ass. 'Ouch.' But maybe, with this body in this world I could do those things. I'd have to test how far this body could go later on. And there was one thing I was sure of, I was good at tiejutsu, and I knew it, I had tricks, I knew pressure points and weaknesses. I could see 'tells,' that show when and how you plan to hit next before the move comes. Maybe, just maybe I could pull this off. Besides if I died, it's not like anything would happen right? I probably wouldn't be with Maya, sure that was obvious. I'd go straight to hell, but might as well go out with a bang!

He nodded. "Interesting… I wonder… I'd like to place to place you on a team where that skill could be analized by a professional. Too bad you don't know anyone, or this would be easier." He sighed, and I rolled my eyes because this was getting waaay to obvious.

"Actually, I met a boy on the way over here, like you said earlier. Uzumaki? Yeah, that was it." I tapped a finger against my chin in fake thought. It would be better this way, if I stuck with that team I would know what was coming before it actually came. And since I considered myself to be at a rather large disadvantage training wise this would tip the scales in my favor.

"Oh my, I wasn't aware that'd you'd befriended our little Naruto." The Hokage said looking astonished even as he lied right to my face. I twitched.

"He's a good kid, a little brash and color blind, but funny as hell." I grinned. He sweat dropped but recovered quickly.

"Well, that would work out nicely." He smiled. "Alright then, you are to go to the academy tomorrow morning at 7:00 am were you will be put on a team. Though I don't think I have to tell you this you shouldn't tell your teammates you're from another world. That could extract… less then favorable responses." He explained delicately.

'No shit.'

Tell them something believable and if they still question you tell them to come and see me." He pulled open a drawer at his desk and withdrew from it and headband. Mine… "If you can not prove worthy of this position as Genin I'll send you back to the academy where you will be watched by the instructors. Let's hope you can keep up Irenara Yukari." He tossed it to me and I caught it looking a little more awed than my pride will let me admit. "Where are you planning to stay?"

"For now? I'll find a nice tree and stay there. I did it my world this shouldn't change a thing. When the missions start I'll use that money to get an apartment or something." I shrugged while putting my forehead protector around my arm, I really did stay in trees all the time. "Oh, Hokage-sama there might be another girl here with me. I haven't seen her since I've arrived so I don't know if she came here as well but if she did," I sighed. "Her name is Hanram Kanoke, she's an orphan, taller then me, silverishy lavender hair, big pink eyes, and as impatent as hell. Ya can't miss her. Just uhh, if you come across her don't kill her, ne?" He chuckled.

"I didn't realize you might not be alone. I'll keep you informed if she appears."

I nodded 'good enough for me.'

"Oh uhh… Lord Hokage… Could you not tell people about this? If this isn't a coma I don't want my life to be all screwed up kay?" I cracked a smile to match his.

"Of course. Irenara-san, how were you planning on returning?" I closed my eyes for a moment and allowed a sheepish smile caress my lips.

"My dear Sandaime-sama, to tell you the truth I have no intentions of ever returning. May my coma last forever, I don't want to wake up. As far as I'm concerned the dead can not walk amongst the living, I joined their ranks recently you see, but perhaps I shall find a new purpose here… another reason to live…" he looked confused which made me smile and I turned walking out on him. "It was nice to meet you Hokage-sama!" I called waving lightly as the door shut behind me.

----------

The walk back to the Sakura tree was longer then I remember. I was ignored most of the way there. The people seemed nice enough, but shadows lingered over this village, unlike the anime I had seen. I paid more attention to my surroundings now as opposed to when Naruto had led me to the Hokage. I ended up passing the Uchiha compound, and it was here that the darkness rained.

I could smell the blood, it was intoxicating, the shadows themselves seemed to ache with memory, consuming all in its path. My heart clenched powerfully and I stopped walking as the dizziness washed over me. My breathing became harsh and I clutched at my shirt as though it were the cause of the sudden vice like grip on my lungs. 'What's… what's happening?' Small beads of sweat gathered at my brow and I choked on the tainted air. If felt like I had inhaled tar. A sound like rushing water brought screams of agony to my ears and the world began to spin black and white. I staggered. Such torture ripped into my heart, a feeling of purest pain like when Maya had slipped away, searing with hells fire.

And then… and then… And automatic sigh escaped my lips as the feeling ebbed and even the shadow seemed to lift a little. Lowering my hand and raising my gaze my eyes fell upon a boy. He was across the street, just walking out of the Uchiha manor. I really didn't have to put two and two together to recognize that face.

'Sasuke, prick of Konaha.' He looked up and for a brief moment we made eye contact. I could almost feel, no wait, I'm sure I could feel him tense. He stared at me for a moment, long and hard, as if trying to decide something and I met him gaze for gaze. Moments passed and the feeling that I was being challenged increased. He lowered his head, narrowed his dark eyes, and I swear he actually growled at me! Growled!

"Hn, fan girl." He grumbled brushing past me with an annoyed look.

'OH HELL NO!'

"Tch, you wish ice cube." I shot back and continued walking. I didn't turn around to see his surprised face, I probably wouldn't have been able to catch it anyway as he composed instantly and went on his way. Then it hit me, 'My eyes.' It was no secret that I had crimson eyes, an oddity for my family. My brother at least had carried my black hair but he shared Mayas eyes.

'he couldn't of thought… He couldn't have though I had the Sharingan.'

I did however catch a glimpse of him as he disappeared into the forest, probably to train.

'No…' I thought, my body suddenly throbbing with guilt. 'Sasuke: orphan, alone, troubled, an avenger… was it your pain I felt?'

**DREAM**

_White walls, an empty room, subject to so little only careful inspection could distinguish where walls started and ceased. I did not exist, I couldn't have. My hand graced it's other in interest, but the feel was distorted, unearthly like they were not my fingertips. My hands where paler to the eye, the nails long but sculpted to perfection. _

_My eyes swept the room again, but what I had at first been convinced to be stark walls were now covered in a dark red print. Words, sentences; scrawled carefully into legible material covering the entire south wall. And at its base huddled on the floor with back facing me, was a person. Short black hair seemed wet somehow and stuck fervently to the young persons face. Its clothes consisted of a white summer dress, torn in places but otherwise falling to the knee. The skin was pale, paler then mine even now, a deathly sort of look in its accompany. _

_I took a few steps closer till I stood directly behind the shuddering figure. Reaching out tentatively I placed a hand on their shoulder. The response was sudden. The girl whipped around with shocked crazed eyes, bloodshot waters disfiguring what I knew to be vibrant grey irises. Her lips were chapped, cracked, and bleeding. She backed into the wall in terror wringing her hands together just feeling her smooth skin and fidgeting something dreadful._

"_You…" She whispered her eyes widening unbelievably. "No, no it's not time, no not yet. My story," She rambled. I just stared at her as her eyes darted everywhere but my face. "I haven't finished it yet. I'm not done, you can't be here yet, you can't." She cried tears leaking far to familiarly down her cheeks. She drew a knife I hadn't noticed till this time. "You can't be here no, no, not yet. I'm not done!" She took the blade and to my horror ran it along her arm. Crimson blood flowed freely with her tears as she sobbed. She dipped her fingertips in the liquid and began to write on the walls again._

"_Don't do that!" I burst out. But she continued to write. "You'll die of blood loss, that's suicide!" I reached for the knife but she shrieked and held it tightly to her body like her last lifeline. I watched with renewed fascination as the wound on her arm healed back in front of my very eyes, to perfect and smooth skin._

"_Now look what you've done, it's closed. My ink. It's all gone again. I'm not done with the story yet." She raised the blade again tears pouring from her tightly closed orbs._

----------

Impressively annoying daylight awoke me the next morning. You never get sun where I slept back in my world because of the numerous trees, and you'd think some of that would apply to this situation, but no, not in Naruto World.

I sighed, 'maybe I'll get shades or something.' I thought, a yawn escaping my lips.

I shoved past my thoughts, my dreams; I'd sort through them later and looked to the sun. I wondered vaguely what time it was and blinked sleepily at my watch. Hm… It was about 6:30...

'Wait 6:30?... oh fuck!" I jumped up and out of my tree looking around frantically for what I already knew I wouldn't see. "Where's the academy?" I mumbled wincing at my forgetfulness.

Well I sort of might have panicked, which I didn't really show on the outside but trust my, pandemonium was my mind at this time. I ran hopelessly around town, oh how stupid I felt, you don't even know. But I didn't want to ask for directions… I'm Yukari damn it! I don't need directions!

Then an idea hit me. I had wanted to try it last night, but I was just too damn tired. 'The roofs.' I stopped and looked only 15 feet up at the low roof before me. '15 feet, low for a ninja, but… can _I_ jump it?'

I closed my eyes which now that I think about it may not have been the smartest thing to do and jumped… for moment my thoughts filled with fear as my feet didn't make contact, but then I felt solid ground beneath them. It had been so easy? I mean apart from the heart attack.

I opened my eyes taking in the village in awe, it really was quiet pretty… I shook my head to clear my thoughts then I did the math. 'You have an excellent view of the Hokage Mountain from the academy, but the tower is to the left. Not too close...' I nodded as my eyes caught sight of a building; training yards, targets, classrooms… 'Perfect.'

'Now a moment of faith. I walked to the edge of the building. 'If I fall at this height, nothing bad will happen.' I decided.

/Except you'll break you're neck./

But I shoved that voice back because that really hadn't been the motivation I was looking for. I looked up, another 10 feet to the next roof, then it evened out. This time I didn't close my eyes I simply jumped, it didn't really require any charka, for that I was thankful. I landed and continued to jump roofs at a casual pace. Wind whipped at my black hair bringing it to fly after me in a wave and I grinned as the cool sensation met my face. I would have to make this a habit, it felt like I was flying! Besides, 'it doesn't look like I'll be returning to my world anytime soon.'

I grabbed an apple from a conveniently placed tree and looked at my watch. 6:45. I groaned, I still had a lot of time. Well I considered it a lot, I always showed up late for school, if I even went. I sat down thinking about my forehead protector. It couldn't stay on my arm, after all what if I wanted to take off my jacket? I didn't have the heart to put it over my forehead, I supposed I could tie it my thigh, but I mean come on, I don't care if it stayed on Naruto characters, I was convinced it would fall off. What can I say, I'm pretty set on that belief!

I reached behind me and untied the ruby necklace. Taking it off, I stared at it for a moment caressing my fingertips absentmindedly over the cool stone. 'Happy birthday… it wasn't very happy though was it.' I though bitterly.

Blood flashed before my eyes again, Maya falling, crying; a girl writing in blood, wide fearful eyes. A cool sweat ran down my brow as the images ceased but I was still shaken. The after effect surely, I was insane. I couldn't be here, just like that girl didn't exist.

Then a though struck me. 'Kanoke.' I reached into my pocket and withdrew the small red package. Unwrapping clumsily my eyes widened at its contents.

I flipped through the Ipod feeling on the verge of tears. Kanoke had really done all of this for me. These damn things weren't cheep and she had gone through enough trouble to put all my favorite bands in it. I could have hugged her then and there, except… she wasn't here.

Where was she? 'Did she not cross over with me?' I wondered wincing slightly at that. It would be hard for her without me. I protected her, and as much as I'll deny it, I did care. Sure there was Tanner, but he had a family, friends and future. Kanoke was mine to protect… much like Maya had been… perhaps she would be better off without me…

With a sigh I tied the necklace around my forehead with the jewel resting nicely in the middle and moved my forehead protector so that it was now around my neck. I nodded that would have to do for now. I just couldn't take off Mayas gift, I probably never would, it meant too much. I checked my watch again. '6:55!' I growled shoving my apple and MP3 player into my pockets again and headed toward the room.

Right… getting down… that doesn't sound too appealing…

I sweat dropped.

**A/N:** Confused yet? Me too. Some fun dream huh? I'm sorry not much time is passing! I can fix that! Haha. But what did ya think. Was it long enough for you? It was long enough for me. My fingers hurt. **Next Time on Fuck I Think My TV's Broken**! Meeting the team, introductions, dancing around the truth, a little violet therapy, trust issues, and opinions opinions opinions. Next time in Chapter 3.** Sadistic Dance Of My Wicked Downfall**. PLEASE REVIEW! ^-^


	3. Sadistic Dance of My Wicked Downfall

**SPEECH: **I dedicate this chapter to Beth, Emma, and other people to go on fanfiction after school out of sheer boredom! TO THE BORED PEOPLE! HAHAHA

**A/N: **Moving too fast eh? Sorry. I thought I was moving too slow. Lol. Don't get the wrong idea people I do not plan to set Yukari up with Naruto. I do want them to form a bond of sorts, but not that kind. The angel thing is simply for irony, as is in Mayas case. Anyone else feel sorry for her about that? I feel almost guilty, being the one that wrote it and all. Her eyes freak Sasuke out, Sakura's pissed, Naruto oblivious. Fun. Oh and pretty music! Hahaha.

**Disclaimer: **Obviously I don't own Naruto, cuz there's no character named Yukari in Naruto like there would be.

**Chapter 3**

**Sadist Dance of My Wicked Downfall**

**(I'll fight for you Maya, only for you. And may my reward be to never wake, and find this all a dream… To never go back…)**

It didn't take me long to find the room, I felt like I knew exactly where I was going, an odd sense of ease like I'd been there before. Sliding the door open my eyes examined the entire room faster then I felt possible. Scanning over chairs, long desks, the stairs, the chalk board at the room's front, and lastly; the people.

And over to the left bright blue eyes gleamed at a boy I had yet to meet. His back was facing me giving me a view of an impressively bored slouch and an amazingly spiky ponytail. Looks like Naruto just finished talking to Shikamaru. 'How does he get his hair to look like a pineapple? That must take like a pint of jell or something.' I marveled shortly.

Naruto's bright excited voice pulled me back to reality. "Hey! Hey! Yukari! Over here!" He called out. I twitched but walked over to him anyway.

"No way, Naruto finally got a friend." The boy yawned, it was clear he didn't give a shit whether I was there or not. I raised a bow, my own hands were resting in their pockets, in my own bored way, but my stance was nothing even remotely compared to his. I smirked at this and inwardly cheered at meeting one of my favorite characters.

"Tch, and does pineapple boy have a name?" I asked eyebrow quirked masterfully. He didn't take much time examining me, sizing me up as others in the room had and were still doing. But I suppose that could either be for laziness, or perhaps being the hidden genius that he was, he didn't need that much time. 'Just play it cool,' I told myself. 'be the perfect anime character, act like you belong.'

"Pineapple boy?" Shikamaru was not amused.

"Yeah, you and Uzumaki make me think of fruit for some reason, and though I am fully aware of whom you are, we have not yet met formally and I am giving you the chance to stop me from calling you pineapple boy for the rest of my stay in Konaha, and trust me, I'm stuck here for a while." I shrugged neatly but was unable to hold back my grin.

"Too troublesome, 'shrimp,' Nara Shikamaru, wish I could say it's a pleasure." I twitched, 'shrimp?' Sure he was taller then me, and I think coming to this world may have actually shrunk me a few inches, but… yep… I'm short.

"Heh, Irenara Yukari, don't call me shrimp and I won't call you pineapple boy." I announced, reaching out a hand in greeting.

He grinned slightly, taking it slowly. "Don't call me pineapple boy and I won't call you shrimp." He turned and I let him walk away, 'bye bye Pineapple Head.' Haha, I knew I wasn't playing fair, but come on, who cares?

"Yukari, you didn't tell me you'd be joining the academy, you didn't have your headband on yesterday." Orange Man whined making me wince again.

"Damn Kit, there is no need to shout, I'm standing right in front of you, I'd probably hear your barest whisper. And now I'm sitting next to you." I continued pulling the chair between him and Sasuke out. Again the Uchiha tensed at my presence but realized it only a second later and relaxed. "Settle down Uchiha," I patted him lightly on the shoulder. "The killer squirrels are miles away, nothing's gonna happen." His glare made my grin only widen. "Oh come on that was funny!"

"As for the ninja thing…" I thought up a smart reply while turning to Naruto. It was easy though considering he hadn't understood yesterday's conversation on the matter. "I did tell you, you just didn't understand. I told you I was a fighter, I had never tried to become a ninja, the missions would distract me from my duties, but now those duties are… gone… now I have time, and now I am a ninja… It appears I'll be here for quite a while before the Hokage will let me take the Chunin exams." My even explanation even amazed me and I mentally gave myself a pat on the back, because I deserved it. "I shall use shorter words next time, ne?"

"HEY!" He protested puffing his cheeks out indignantly.

I smirked.

"AH! Sasuke wannabe!" He accused pointing directly at me. I twitched… again.

"Tch, you forget Orange Man, you and Pineapple Head are the only ones here that I am acquainted with, but I'll tell you right now I don't like being compared to Ice cubes!" Inside I was laughing. Naruto was just about to answer when a loud, "I'M FISRT!" Came from the door way. My fingertips twitched, the only indication that I knew something in the room had changed, they had always done so, even for something so small it may be of little significant.

I sighed as Naruto looked over and grinned at Sakura. 'Poor Naruto… or is it poor Uchiha? The duo fan girls have arrived.'

"Hi Sakura!" He shouted.

"Keh, Pinky and Banshee, perfect. We've only just met and already they bother me." I folded my arms and lay my head on them relaxing. "3… 2…"

"Hi Sasuke-kun!" Sakura squealed.

"Damn it," I muttered. "My timing's off." Briefly I wondered if Sasuke could hear me mumbling to myself, he couldn't have been so oblivious to his surroundings not to, could he? That would be simply foolish. You should be alert at all times. Thus is the ninja way of survival! I sweat dropped, you see apparently in my zoned out state I hadn't noticed Sakura talking, 'did she really plan to take my seat? Tch, I don't think so.' Now normally I wouldn't have cared, I preferred window seats myself but now there was just no way I was going to move.

I'm a bitch like that.

"Hey I was here before either of you! I should get to sit next to Sasuke-kun!" Some random fan girl shouted.

"No Me, I should!"

I stood up. "EHEM!" I had had enough. My tone sharply cut the atmosphere, easily like a knife to butter and with no resistance. 'Good.' I thought. 'Now I've got their attention.' "I have never been so ashamed to call myself a female!" I declared my hands on my hips. "What is it about this guy you like so much!?! He's a walking Popsicle! Now this is my seat mine. I was talking to Uzumaki before ya'll interrupted, so do something constructive and say, I dunno, jump off a cliff, make the world a better place! Get it? Mine! Got it!? GOOD!" I didn't even sugar coat it. Harsh? Yes, but not devoid of humor.

"Who do you think you are? As far as I can see that seat is open and waiting for someone to have." A blond exclaimed. She stepped forward and I got a good look at her. She had long blond hair pulled up in a high pony with rather clear blue eyes. 'Ino.' I registered. 'I dub thee Banshee. Haha.' Truth be told I rather favored Ino over Sakura, though that may have been because Sakura drives me insane!!! I secretly hoped that Ino was faking her infatuation with Sasuke just to get back at Sakura. But damn was she convincing…

"My apologies, I did not realize you were blind." I fought back a grin and crossed my arms for good measure.

"NANI?! I'm not blind!" She shrieked, it made me want to cover my ears but instead I merely cocked my head to the side in mock confusion.

"Really? Then how can you not see this seat is taken? I can assure you I will not be giving it up any time soon. Furthermore it would take a blind person to not realize that the 'Ice Cube' is clearly uninterested, your attempts only distract and annoy him and what's worse, they annoy me." I elaborated. "You see how this is a problem, don't you?"

"What did you call my Sasuke-kun!" She hissed taking a sharp hold of my hand, funny that was the only part that offended her. I could faintly hear Sasuke's sigh, this probably happened a lot. I didn't care, because she was touching me, and that was just rude. Immediately my face turned grave and my eyes laced with black venom.

"You're just jealous because Sasuke-kun doesn't like you like he likes us, you wannabe." She insisted.

"It breaks my heart to hear you say that." The statement dripped with sarcasm. "However I will advise you to think wiser of your actions in future and remove your hand immediately. Blind or not I grow weary of your foolishness, Yamanaka. Please take this joke from my wrist." My eyes glued to hers threateningly though I knew this had caught everyone's attention. You don't look away from the enemy; it's an invitation to death… like I looked away from father.

"Why you little, how dare you! Arg …" She raised a hand as though to slap me but not letting it fall, and I grinned.

"Go a head, just try it…" I pushed, that strange hint of insanity lighting up my voice.

It worked.

Her palm was stopped inches before it reached my face. My free hand gripped her arm in what I'm sure was a painful grasp. I quickly slid my foot beneath hers making her stumble forward and pulled her arm behind her back like they do when you get caught by a policeman. I'll admit it, I've been in this situation myself before, cops don't really like me that much. But for Ino it had happened just too fast, one minute she's about to slap me and the next her arm's in a very painful position and her face is shoved into my desk.

"I realize, I am new here and you probably think I'm a bitch huh? An invading bitch that just stepped on your turf and tried to take over. Well I may be a bit of a bitch, I admit to that but I have no interest in taking over. I am here because I have no other choice. You got that!? Not to swoon over hot ninja boys, and certainly not to interfere with your swooning. But you see it was incredibly rude of you to try to take my seat without even acknowledging me, and incredibly annoying of you to threaten me. Nothing personal, truth be told I don't want to fight with you at all, you seem relatively decent, next time simply ask, I'll probably move." I chuckled for a moment. I probably would too. "By the way, I'm Irenara Yukari, it's a pleasure to meet you, Ino." I smiled sweetly at her as she gasped for breath and I closed my eyes for a moment before releasing her and taking my respective seat, analyzing the look she gave that told me I had disturbed her greatly. She clearly didn't know what to think.

'So much for acting like you belong,' I sighed. 'I can't just go around acting like I know everything about everyone! Stupid stupid Yukari!' I thought shaking my head.

I turned back to Naruto only to find his seat absent. Now he was on the table, death glaring the Ice Cube. How long had they been at it? "What's so great about you?" He mumbled. I could see the electricity. Funny, I had always thought that would just be something for watchers, I didn't know other people could see it in the Anime.

'I wonder…' I caught sight of a fly and flicked in between the two. It was zapped and fell dead only a second later, the corners of my mouth twitched.

"Naruto! Hey, stop glaring at Sasuke!" I wasn't really paying attention to the crowds anymore. I knew what was coming, and I was so excited to have a front row seat you don't even know.

"Give it to him Sasuke!" Someone yelled, and I almost had an aneurism from holding so much laughter back. 'Yeah Sasuke," I thought, "Give it him. Hahahahaha.'

Then that fateful moment; in slow motion, well for me at least, the boy in front's elbow hit Naruto and the two rivals met in a surprised lip lock. A little accidental kiss. The kind you usually find at the beginning of a Shogo Beat romance manga. And here I was fangirling like some kind of demented school girl.

For a moment all was silent, onyx and sapphire eyes widening in shock and horror, split only by my loud laughter. They turned away spitting in discussed. Naruto shouting something about poison and Sasuke saying something that sounded a lot like 'I'm going to kill you!'

"Well how do you like that?" I laughed. "There you have it girls. It's obvious the Uchiha swims in a different direction then you all thought. Bet it explains a lot." There was a surge in the air, a powerful killing intent that made my left hand twitch again. "It's about time you came out of the closet, eh Uchiha?" I grinned tugging at his collar playfully. It was a mark of how distracted he was that he didn't even look at me. But that was okay, I'd be a little distracted too if I'd just found out that I was gay.

"Na-ru-to." Cracking knuckles could be heard and suddenly Naruto was being beaten to a pulp. Poor Naruto, I thought about helping him. But there was something I wanted to do first…

Hopping down I plopped almost professionally beside another girl. She turned to me shyly but never made eye contact. She had short black hair and a thick jacket, but my favorite thing about this girl had to be her palest lavender eyes, pupiless as they were.

"Hey. It's nice to know there's still a couple girls in this class that don't go head over heals at good looks. I'm Irenara Yukari." I said cheerily and stuck my hand out in gentle greeting. Her eyes widened in shock for moment before she timidly took my hand.

"H-Hyuga Hinata." She whispered shyly. If my ears had not been as good as they were I'm sure I would not have caught it over all the screaming.

"Hyuga eh? You must be related to Neji then." She stiffened. "No offense but I can't wait to poke that guys eyes out!" I closed one eye and sticking my tongue out the corner of my mouth mimed poking someone else's eye out. "Five cones of Cookie's'en Cream says he doesn't think I'm a worthy opponent. If you ask me, the kids gotta lighten up or start realizing that not all of us were born with the 'fate' to be scum." Her eyes where wide in shock and her hands were momentarily put to rest. "Oh, did I offend you Hinata-chan?"

"N-no, I just… didn't e-expect you t-to be…" She fidgeted and I grinned. "Y-You're being v-very f-friendly to me…"

"Ya, I suppose I did give a bad first impression. Underestimation is just a petpeeve of mine, if you couldn't tell." I winked. "But I don't think I'd actually poke his eye out, maybe, but there'd have to be a better reason. For example I think I'd tolerate Neji better then I do Uchiha, the prick. But I haven't poked his eye out… yet." Hinata blinked but looked slightly relieved, almost amused.

"Y-You don't l-like Sasuke much, do you Yuki-chan."

I gave a shuttering breath as her words washed over me like ice for the river of Styx. _'Yuki…'_ My eyes widened and I became very stiff.

"Ah, I-I didn't mean t-to be rude, I-I'm sorry Yukari-san." She bowed her head in shame and the pain in my chest subsided.

"No, no it's, it's alright, just please don't call me Yuki, Yuka is fine." _'Yuka' _where the hell was Kanoke anyway. "It's not that I don't like Uchiha, I don't even really think he's a prick… you're very shy aren't you Hinata-chan." It wasn't a question more like a soft spoken observation, a useful turn in conversation. Her head bowed farther.

"I, I'm sorry." She whispered.

"On the contrary, it's just somewhat of a quality, hardly something to judge you by. Everybody has them. Uzumaki for example is, as I understand it, known rather well for his loud comments and prankster history, they are qualities he posses but one would have to dig deeper to determine the true boy beneath." I stated thoughtfully.

"Naruto-kun has a good heart." There was no stutter in her words.

"That he has. And I'm happy to know someone else sees this. I like you Hinata-chan, you're different. You should join Orange Man and me down at the Raman stand sometime." I smirked and she chewed on her lip.

"Well, I-I wouldn't w-want to in-interrupt you if you t-two were… involved…" It was a very poorly hidden question, one of which she was waiting anxiously for the answer twiddling her fingers second nature. I looked blankly at her for a moment before completely breaking into a fit of laughter.

"Hinata-chan! Orange Man is like a brother to me! Not a boyfriend! You don't date your brother, or your relatives for that matter. Unless… you and Neji are…" I feigned a look of shock.

"O-Of course not!" She assured and I faked relief as well, I knew her current affections were held by the boy who was still being beaten to a pulp.

"Whew, I thought for a moment there I had REALLY offended you. Don't want to do that, you're too funny." She blinked. "You remind me of someone I used to know."

"R-Really? W-who?" She asked curiously. I couldn't tell her… I couldn't say it aloud now, telling someone else, just so flat out and obvious would be admitting it to myself that she was really gone. Not yet… I gave her a smile and patted her cutely on the head but I didn't answer.

"But you are not the same, Hinata-chan, See ya around, kay kid?"

Now I like to think of myself as a relatively nice person, and it wouldn't be very nice to just leave poor Naruto there now would it? I had taken notice when fighting Ino that my movements were quicker, if it was because of this world, I was grateful, now I did have ninja speed. Using it I slipped into the crowd of shouting girls and pulled a poor cowering Naruto out. I dragged him into the seat next to me and sat back down.

"Ugh, that's the second miracle you've preformed since you've arrived. Thanks."

I blinked at this. 'Miracle?' that went back to when he called me an angel the other day. He didn't really think I was an angel did he? I hope not. I was far from it. Maya had always been the angel and me… I was the demon. Funny really, I never minded being the demon it was oddly fitting, where it could have been an insult I took the compliment with stride.

"Hn, no problem I don't mind that you're gay." I responded flatly, but I don't think he took my joke for what it was. His jaw hit the floor. "I mean I've had my suspicions from the start I just didn't want to say anything incase I was wrong. But with the 'Ice cube?' Ya, I didn't see that one coming." I yawned bringing my arms behind my head in a relaxed pose. "I guess it makes sense though. He is pretty good looking, and talented. Better for you than Pinky at least."

"Wha! Yukari no! You don't actually think I'm… No really I'm not! I don't like boys. Well I like them, but I don't like them like them… Girls! I like Girls!"

"Orange Man." I decided to spare him the mental trauma I had obviously caused though I couldn't suppress a snicker. "Relax, I was just kidding."

"Yukari, that wasn't funny!" Naruto huffed, haha he huffed! I'm sorry it just sounds funny.

"Alright class." I blinked staring with renewed interest down at the teacher. He had a long scar across his nose, or maybe it was a birthmark, and brunette hair brought into a small ponytail. 'Iruka.' I registered again. His green vest showed he was a chunin and obviously our teacher. His endurance must have been phenomenal for putting up with Naruto all these years. I didn't see him so often in the later episodes but he was pretty close to Naruto I guess.

"As of today, you are all ninjas. To get here you have faced difficult trials and hardships." I could feel Naruto shaking with a mixture of pride and anticipation next to me. "But that's nothing. What comes next will be far more difficult. Now you are only Genin, first level ninjas. All the Genin will be grouped into three man squads. Each squad will be led by a Jounin, an elite ninja."

'Tch, elite ninja huh?' sure Kakashi kicked ass and all but I don't think 'elite' was a good word for it. He went through the groups, none of it was new to me, then,

"Squad 7. Uzumaki Naruto, Haruno Sakura,"

'YEAH!' Naruto cheered.

"Uchiha Sasuke,"

'NO!' Naruto's head drooped.

Sakura stood up with her fist in the air. 'YEAH!'

"and Irenara Yukari." I flinched letting my black hair fall over my eyes in shadow suddenly experiencing an unwanted mood swing. I sounded so out of place. The fourth member of what was supposed to be a three man team. The new girl, that bitch, Sasuke's wannabe girlfriend, weak… pathetic… useless… My fists subconsciously clutched at the table's edge, turning my already pale knuckles white.

I had gone through it all before. I could do it again. I wasn't weak, and I was far from pathetic. 'Watch, I'll fight. If only just for you Maya, I'll fight. And may my reward be to never wake and find this all a dream. To never go back…and maybe even find a reason… why I do still insist on living…?'

Iruka finished his list but it's safe to say there were still questions. "Iruka-sensei, why does a great ninja like me have to be in the same group with a slug like Sasuke?" Guess who? Yep Naruto. He stood up pointing almost accusingly at Sasuke.

"Sasuke had the highest scores of all the graduating students. Naruto, you had the lowest scores." Iruka replied I sweat dropped, did he have to be so blunt about it?

Naruto was struck speechless.

"Just make sure you don't get in my way, loser." Sasuke scoffed.

"HEY! WHAT DID YOU SAY?!"

"Hard of hearing?" The Uchiha replied coolly. I had to admit, Sasuke was giving my fun comebacks a run for their money, while still managing to melt hearts. Part of me was bummed out while the other was screaming for more. Naruto growled in frustration as the sparks started to fly again.

"Naruto, just knock it off and sit down." Sakura hissed pulling the boy down herself. But she too had a question. "Iruka-sensei? You said three man squads were to make it more fair, but ours has four." She pointed out.

'Well looky there, Pinky can count.' I thought… jesus christ did I just myself a red neck accent in my head!?

"Ah yes, the newbie. Irenara-san was just added yesterday to this squad program but we didn't have the proper numbers to make everyone's team even. The Hokage gave her file to me personally and assured me that with her '_skill level'_ she could _'easily'_ keep her place." He elaborated.

I gulped, 'skill level huh?' '… wait, I had a file???'

"After lunch, you'll meet your new jounin teachers. Until then, class dismissed." They got up to leave.

**-----Outside -----**

I walked taking the breeze as I exited the building. I supposed I'd have to eat that apple for lunch. I didn't really have anything better, and my lack of money made me regret not having my wallet when I was sucked into the T.V. 'Wait! What am I talking about!? It's the coma's fault I'm in this problem in the first place! You'd think my subconscious would care enough to materialize a wallet for me. Tch, damn my subconscious.' I shook my head.

This was stupid.

Looking up I could see where Sasuke was sitting at a window. He must have already said no to Sakura's offer on lunch, was my team the only one not eating together. 'Kakashi's got it right to test our teamwork, it's a wonder they passed at all!? How am I supposed to get them to work with me! Naruto's got pride, Sasuke's a prick, and Sakura probably thinks I'm a bitch like Ino! Peachy, just fucking peachy.'

"Hey you! Yeah, you!"

"Speak of the devil and she shall appear." I mumbled turning my gaze to where the angry blond was jumping from. I could see Sikamaru shaking his head and Choji eating, perfectly from my angle.

"Was there something you wanted Yamanaka-san?" I tired to crack a fake smile but it looked more like a smirk.

'Damn.'

"Oh don't act so high and mighty Pipsqueak! Stop looking at my Sasuke-kun." She demanded stomping over to me.

But I was still stuck on pipsqueak. 'Pipsqueak? Again with the short jokes? I'M NOT THAT SHORT!!! I'M FIVE FUKING FEET AND ONE FUCKING INCH! THAT'S LIKE AVERAGE YOU MOTHER FUCKING GIANTS!!! I shook my head slowly to show disappointment. But she took it as denial.

"I saw you looking at him with my own eyes!"

"I thought we'd already established that you were blind? Besides, accusations are best made with evidence. That'll never hold up in court!" I chirped, when had I come back to being chipper??? "I already told you, I am not here to, what was the word I used again? It was such a good word too… Damn it. The fact is I don't care what you do." I gave her my best bored look and this seemed to enrage her even more. She had quiet the short fuse.

"He likes me wayyy more then he'd ever like a child like you! You just stay away from him." She threatened.

"That's going to be quiet difficult considering we're on the same team." I raised an amused brow as she growled in frustration. At least she was holding back this time as opposed to attacking me. Maybe she learned her lesson and I didn't even have to say it! That was certainly rare. Where's the fun in that?

"So did you already give Haruno this little talk or do I get the honor of being the first? She may need it more then me. I have no doubt that the Ice cube will see me as nothing more then a dead weight, and we shall stay far from one another," She grinned. "But ya never know, you should keep your eyes closed in case I act on how delicious his lips look and decide I'd like a taste…" I slowly licked my lips to complete the joke.

"Oh… oh hell no!" She pulled her palms back as though to shove me away and thrust them forward to push at my shoulders. It wasn't meant to hurt. I moved to the side and she stumbled forward, with a little help from my foot, okay a lot of help, she fell flat on the ground. I let my boot on her back keep her down for a moment. Time to teach, haha, let's see if I still got it.

"Anger is a powerful emotion and in some cases a power booster. But it is also a blindfold. It prevents you from seeing the most obvious outcomes and avoiding them; from thinking rationally. Do not succumb to anger, channel it and use its power but do not let it blind you. Or you will surely loose." I removed my foot and let her stand. These teachings were given by me mostly to Tanner, when he decided I'd make a good teacher, weird kid that one. I'd known most of them by heart, each one as true as the next, and he can now certainly hold his own. I almost missed these moments of teaching… almost.

She simply stared at me for a minute. "I think we may have gotten off on the wrong foot." I cracked a small smile.

"No kidding." She grumbled.

"I do hope we can look past our sensei's bad choice in teaming and come to an understanding." I reached out a hand. She blinked a couple times then smiled and took it.

"Wow, it's a miracle. You got her to stop screaming." Shikamaru commented monotonously above us. Funny really, I had forgotten all about him.

"So I did, Pineapple Head." I chuckled putting my hand back in my pocket.

'Miracle…'

"SHIKAMARU! The real miracle would be getting you stop being so lazy!" Ino shouted.

I laughed at this.

"You have to do nothing less then sell your soul to the devil to do that." I smirked but he didn't seem to care.

"Keep talking 'Shorty,' you only put me to sleep faster." He yawned.

I twitched. Fucking a, I twitched again! But seriously 'Shorty!' I guess since I bent the rules he could do it too. But I'm still not happy about it. I frowned slightly and turned to walk away.

Naruto would be coming soon. I figured, and I didn't want to be here when everything went down.

**-----Like 5 minuets later-----**

I munched on my apple happily as I flipped threw my MP3 player. I didn't want to watch the Naruto world right now. I hated this episode, how much Naruto liked Sakura when clearly he was ment to be with Hinata. Funny I didn't even feel sorry for Sakura about her liking Sasuke. I mean come on, he was focused on one thing and one thing only, revenge. I couldn't blame him though, I had already gotten mine.

The other characters would be busy now, I figured picking a song and jumping down from the tree. I was perfectly used to jumping now, like I had done it every day of my life and was eager to test the rest of me. In fact, I'm proud to say I jumped all the way here after meeting with Ino! I only fell once… okay twice, but the second time was that squirrels fault!

I placed the Player in my pocket hooking the ear phones around my ears carefully. The song was 'Downfall' by Trust Company. It had always made me think of Naruto or maybe even Sasuke when he was squaring off with Itachi.

I did a quick stretch, cracking my neck to either side, discarding my jacket in the process. I tried to crack my knuckles but it's something I had yet to master. You always see ninjas kicking stumps or a tree in Anime to awesome theme music; corny I know but I figured, hell why not try.

I mean if this was Naruto… wait… did that mean there were hundreds of viewers out there watching me. Good god, How fucked up was that? I felt like my privacy had been invaded!

Then I decided to ignore it because it was irrelevant and wouldn't stop me from living out my life recklessly as a ninja till I either died or woke up from my coma. Good plan no? So if there they are watching I wanted to be the character that I had always wanted to see in Naruto, but the closest I got was a Temari/Ten Ten/Tsunade/Anko cross. The ass kicking non fan girl, in the main group girl!

I had already tried charka control in climbing up the side of a tree and found it ridiculously hard. Ya, it's not just cuz Sakura was a girl, I'll give her props for that. I always seemed to expel too much charka and ended up splitting the tree. I pouted thinking back. Well I'll get it eventually!

I took my stance which was only for offence. Left palm outstretched flatly with two fingers pointing up and my right hand drawn in a fist at my side. My leg bent so most of my weight was supported by my right leg behind me. And so as the music started so did I. My movements wonderfully fluid, faster then I could have hoped for, kicks, punches.

Fear in me so deep it gets the best of me,

In the fear I fall, here it comes face to face with me,

Here I stand hold back so no one can see,

I feel these wounds, step down, step down,

step down.

I delivered an uppercut blow, my knuckles bleeding but they were numb. I began pushing myself harder, making myself go faster, feeling the tune spur me on, I'd surely feel the pain later. Yet rage, undirected boiled at my surface. I could feel it tearing at me, making my eyes water though I knew the tears could never fall. But in my trance I failed to notice the eeriest feeling of being watched, those same eyes, by the person I couldn't find.

(am I) Breaking Down

Can I break away

Push me away, make me fall,

Just to see, another side of me,

Push me away, you can see,

what I see, the other side of me.

The chorus met with my own rhythm as I elbowed, kicked, and pummeled my tree with sheer force coming from lord knows where, turning my moves into a dance. All I knew is that I could feel urgency in the air, a need to beat the crap out of something. Hate, purest, enormous, amounts coming in pangs that sent that face to me. If it was not released I'd surely be torn to shreds…

Fall back on me, and I'll be the strength I need,

to save me now, just come face to face with me,

stay in place you'll be the first to see, me heal these wounds,

step down, step down, step down, down

I had switched trees, others demolished and me still going strong, though my arms were thoroughly coated in blood, I hadn't used my charka yet. And a new set of eyes, another one was watching but I was far too caught up to notice.

I'm not breaking, down

can I break away

push me away, make me fall,

just to see another side of me,

push me away you can see,

what I see, the other side of me

Go!

It pushed me to let loose what charka I had. I had no clue if it was a lot compared to others, but it was enough. 'Concentrate…' That's the best thing about this. Instead of worrying about the tree by letting out too much charka I was just letting it flow with full intentions of great damage done. Damage was something I could definitely do. Shouting with each blow I brought my charka loaded fist to this trees side and it split. I flipped speedily to the left with a twirl I'd surely not have been able to do in my world and brought a strong heel to crack with a thunderous noise its trunk dead center.

Fall, can I break away

push me away, make me fall,

just to see another side of me,

push me away you can see,

what I see, the other side of me

I slid over to my final victim, a large bolder. I didn't know where it had come from, nor did I care. A smirk curved my lips at the size. And I started to tear at it with charka loaded hands, making my blows more complex for my own entertainment. I contemplated faintly about the blood I was losing, but decided it wasn't enough to do too much damage, and none of it was quite on my clothes just yet.

No one can see anything on the other side of me

I walk, I crawl, loosing everything and waiting for the downfall

No one can see everything on the other side of me

I walk, I crawl loosing everything on the downfall.

As the song came to its close I was hit with an idea. It sounded so unreal, I wanted to try it so bad. Something I think I might have ripped off from 'The Slayers.' But Tune was near perfect. Perhaps I should have done 'headstrong' for this? Later, defiantly

Downfall, Fall.

I shoved a flat palm at the bolder forcing all the charka I could muster through it and letting that wave loose inches from the target, and I screamed. I screamed because I couldn't cry and I knew my stitches were straining painfully out of place. I screamed because my vision swam and it was dangerous. I screamed because he killed her. I screamed because that bastard killed Maya…

Chips flew every which way as huge dent was created in the stone itself and I can't say I wasn't proud. I was sweating heavily the liquid pouring down my brow as fast as if it were rain. And my arms where almost completely bathed in blood, already I could feel their ache. But I was happy. My ragged breaths told me that this was an almost excellent stress reliever, something I would probably take into bad habit, but I didn't care. Tilting my head to the side looked at my… art? hee hee. It looked like an actual battle field, and I decided then and there, that one day using only my charka, I would break a bolder.

"Just wait, my first attempt is never nearly as good as my second. I'll destroy you before this is over. I'm not giving up, and I'm not going down. You nor anyone else will be my downfall." I chuckled at my choice of words while rubbing my knuckles wirily. "Watch me Maya, I will die without regrets, and till that day, I will live… though my bloodline is surely damned."

A feeling struck me like lightning, that 'being watched' one again, and I shuddered as I looked for the gaze. It was all just so unnerving, it didn't feel right. I don't know how long I stood there looking for its source when a rustle in the brush made me whip around.

It was that prick again, Sasuke. He had bad timing; the feeling had vanished, my watcher was now gone, I wouldn't find him. Good question Naruto. 'What's so great about Sasuke?' I quickly hid my arms behind my back, but I winced as I was sure he saw. His eyes briefly scanned the scene with me at its center. He looked pretty angry actually, about something or other. Maybe someone finally pulled that stick out of his ass… or shoved it up farther.

"Did Naruto come by here?" He asked grudgingly.

"No." I started to laugh with a cheer I though I had lost. "But a very chipper version of you did." I lied.

"Where'd he go?" He growled, apparently he didn't think this was funny. Which I found a real shame since it was obviously hilarious.

"Come on. Where do you think he went? He likes Pinky, Pinky likes you. Now that he's you where do you think he's gonna go?" I gave him a moment and was finally satisfied when his eyes widened. But he seemed to hesitate before leaving. I shook my head.

"Hopeless." I sighed not bothering to be tactful. "Check the bench down the road by the academy. You'll find her there. Just hope Orange Man didn't promise her a kiss later or anything, I'm sure that would suck." He nodded and turned to leave. "What? I don't get a thank you?" I could feel him twitch. It's about time someone besides me twitched. That's all I've been doing since I got here. I swear.

**------------**

When I arrived back at the academy I was late and I knew it. My hands were sufficiently bandaged up to my elbows like Rock Lee. But I gotta say, they probably looked better on me. Haha. And my shins were pretty bandaged too though the pants and boots hid it well. My jacket was now draped over my arm though I wasn't exactly what you'd call squeaky clean.

As I slid the door open I was slightly disappointed that the Blind Guardian music in my ears hadn't been turned up loud enough to drown out the voices. "You're late Yukari!" Naruto accused. He looked a little worse for wear, probably an after effect of running to the bathroom a lot. He was a tad bit paler, and his hair was a wee bit more messed up. But his stance was proud, strong, and ready.

"Hn," I shrugged, nodding to acknowledge each of my new teammates. "My apologies, I got caught up." I replied facing my blond friend.

"Caught up? What were you doing that was so important you can be late for meeting our new sensei? And what happened to your arms?" Naruto persisted.

"Training." I said evenly. It was a nice flat answer to both questions. "Look around you Orange Man. Our sensei hasn't arrived just yet, and I wouldn't hold my breath on him coming anytime soon. No loss really. And my arms are just fine thank you very much." I insisted, it was true, my arms were just fine… apart from the horrid ach that had settled in. They felt ten times heavier and the muscles where screaming…. My legs, tch, I'm lucky to be walking without a wobble. Never before had I put myself through such a hell and come out of it so happily! Yet it was my hands that truly hurt to move. Actually a more accurate description would be 'it was like having thousands of needles being stabbed forcibly through my fingers and down my knuckles. Fists hurt more than anything else. It appears that in my training I had broken the skin with my nails.

"I don't know if anyone told you Kit, but your breath smells faintly of sour milk, you seem pale as well, has your stomach been acting up by any chance?" He blinked for a moment. True these were things easily missed when one wasn't looking but it was an excellent way at changing an unwanted subject. His blue eyes grew wide with sudden realization and he started cursing under his breath. "Hey, Orange Man, you okay?" He looked up and I could tell how much he must have appreciated my concern.

"I'm great! Never been better! Believe it!" He shouted and I allowed myself a relived smile, at least I was making someone's life a little happier.

"I'm glad to hear that." I walked silently to the other side of Sasuke, sitting in the corner with the window letting out a small hiss as my wounds protested. A catlike yawn escaped my lips, my eyelids drifting shut. "I really overdid it this time…" And softly almost inaudibly, I hummed myself into total darkness.

**----- I'm asleep for this part so I'm taking you out of my prov. You're in a different prov. now-----**

**------Pinky's prov.------**

'I'm going to marry Sasuke-kun, and we'll be together, forever, and ever, and ever, and ever, and ever, and ever…

**Uhh haha, okay… creepy, lets get out of this prove shall we?**

**-----Ice cube's prov.-----**

After the quiet melody had ended and I was certain Yukari was asleep, I peered at her with interest. Funny, she looked a lot less likely to rip your head off when she was asleep. _"What is it about this guy you like so much!?! He's a walking popsicle!" _I winced. She doesn't' have a very good opinion of me either, still, better then a fan girl. Her peaceful expression was enough to make any one person envy whatever dream she must have been having. Unlike the nightmares that plagued me almost every time I closed my eyes. 'Itachi.' I growled at the memory.

Her red eyes unearthed and bothered me. The first time I had seen her, I'll admit, I thought she was another Uchiha. She carries the appearance flawlessly, and holds herself with the same arrogance of one who believes themselves superior, a common trait among my clan. Luckily I had avoided it… But it couldn't have been. My clan was long gone. And what did she say her last name was? Irenara? Yes that was it. I've never heard of them before. Did they all have red eyes, like a blood-line-limit they didn't have to turn off?

'Interesting,' I thought. 'I wonder how strong she is…' I could hardly judge her skill by her fights with that fan girl of mine, it didn't allow me to see enough, and true to her wise words Ino had not fought up to potential with childish antics. It makes one wonder if they knew I could hear the entire conversation. But after all the damage I watched her cause in that field she couldn't have been that weak. I recognized that hate, I felt it towards my brother, whom did she feel it towards? I glanced doubtfully at her arms. I had seen all the blood on them, there was no way she was fine. There was also no way I could trust her. Curious questions sprung to mind and my eyes narrowed accusingly. 'Yukari Irenara…'

**Orangeman's prov. **

'Where's our sensei?! ARG! Looks like Yukari-chan was right, we got a lazy ass for a sensei. NO FAIR!' I sighed. 'Oh well at least I get to be on a team with Sakura! Too bad Sasuke-teme has to be here too.' I shot my best venomous glare at the bastard only to find him looking off into space by my new friend. Completely oblivious, 'and he calls me an idiot!'

Yukari had fallen asleep. 'I wonder why she really bandaged her arms.' She didn't strike me as the type to have done it just because she thought it looked cool. It was nice for a change to have someone not running away or yelling. She even cared for my health and wellbeing!! _"Hey, Orange Man, you okay?"_ _"I'm glad to hear that."_ Like an angel.

'Angel,' I liked that nickname for her. But then of course, all that was probably because she didn't know about the nine-tailed fox. My expression saddened considerably. 'If she ever found out… she'd probably hate me…just like everyone else…'

**Pinky's prov.**

'And ever, and ever, and ever, and ever, and ever, and ever… hey wait.' My eyes focused only to find MY SASUKE LOOKING OPPOSITE OF ME! 'Why is Sasuke looking at the Yukari girl? Sasuke-kun?'

**Inner Sakura:** Oh she's going down. WAYYY DOWN! CHA!

"Wait maybe he's just looking out the window! Ya that's it. There's no way.'

**Inner Sakura: '**Cha, like Our Sasuke could ever like that idiot.'

"Now now, that's hardly the way to treat a new teammate.' I frowned.

**Inner Sakura: **'Ya, ya, you were thinking it too…'

_**---- uhg, she's fucking insane!---**_

**A/N:** Okay so I'm a little against Sakura, but I'm gonna help my tweaked opinion of her flow through my OC. It will make my life easier. But life ain't perfect either I'm gonna put Yukari through hell before this story is done. And next time, not only will she give a marvelous into, haha, but she'll face off with Kakashi… **Next Time on Fuck I Think My TV's Broken, **Scarecrow, creepy introductions, the bell test, convincing, teamwork, speeches, swords, Xelloss, and dreams worlds… Next time in **Chapter 4. Vampires, Bands, and Ice Cream **


	4. Vampires, Bands, and Ice Cream

**A/N: **Hey ya'll I'm back! Sorry for taking so long but the good news is this chapie is nice and long! Again I apologize in advance for whatever terrible spelling you may encounter, I know I can't spell, it's no secret. I'd also like to thank all of you who reviewed!! I love you guys! If I didn't get reviews I'd probably drop the story thinking it sucked.

**Disclaimer: **Psh, it's probably best that I don't own Naruto considering the amount of drool worthy characters on the show! Haha

**Chapter 4**

**Vampires, Bands, and Ice Cream**

**(Then you will fail…)**

**----Later----**

"Hey! What are you doing?" I could have woken up to anything. Naruto's whining, just me waking up, a particularly loud part in the music that was currently blasting in my left ear. But no, I wasn't so fortunate. I woke up to Sakura's high pitched accusations and after a nice dreamless sleep too. At least sort of, all I remembered was snow… I twitched letting a low growl escape my lips. "Someone's gonna die." I whispered cracking my knuckles. I fluttered my eyes open to see Naruto poorly balanced on a stool, chalk board eraser in hand. Setting his trap.

Naruto snickered, "That's what he gets for coming late. When he walks through that door SURPRISE!" My anger fled, replaced by a mischievous grin.

"You're asking for trouble. You know you shouldn't do that." Sakura scolded. Oh how I couldn't wait to prove her wrong. Especially since I knew it was all a front. She was loving every minute of this! Fascinating really.

"Our teacher's a Jonin, an elite ninja. You think he'd fall for such a childish trick?" Sasuke drawled. He jumped as I put my hand on his shoulder.

"Awe come on Popsicle, lighten up. You know it's funny." I retorted an uncharacteristic smile on my face. I was doing a lot of uncharacteristic things lately. For example when he glared at me I pouted cutely. I POUTED! I DON'T POUT! It's like against the Yukari code of honor. Oh well, one comment, I swear, they make one fucking comment, and I punch them in the face. Simple as that. "Fine, but if he does fall for it, you own me Ice cream."

'Ah, Ice cream, my soft spot.'

"Whatever, he's not going to fall for it." I grinned, oh just how wrong he was. Just then I heard the door slide open. I glanced up just in time to see a head of silver, the black of a mask, the flash of a hayate, and the ever so satisfying sound and appearance of an eraser hitting its target.

"He fell for it! I totally got him!" Naruto cried laughing happily. I blinked. I remembered how Kakashi looked in the Anime sure. But was he supposed to seem this familiar? Sakura was running her mouth about how it was all Naruto's fault and she'd tried to stop him he just wouldn't listen. 'Tch, ya right.'

I uh... sorta socked her in the face. Not hard, just enough to make her shut up. "Can it Pinky, you little suck up." I growled.

He picked up the eraser and studied it for a moment before looking at us. "Hmm... let's see. My first impression of you guys is… you're all a bunch of idiots." I sweat dropped.

Well he was right…

**---------**

I looked around keenly, tense, alert, it was a really high rooftop! If the others noticed my need to observe they either perceived it as natural; considering none of them knew me or easily shrugged it off. To top it off I would just look up at Kakashi wondering why he seemed so goddamned familiar. It was, well let's face it, it was really annoying.

We were finally seated and still I was tense. Was it supposed to comfort me that I was sitting in between the Uchiha and the pink menace? Personally I think Sasuke was using me to get away from the girl. Smart move.

But what if a giant bird flew down and just knocked me off building? What if a flying squirrel attacked my face and I stumbled over the edge!? Or what if…

"Alright kids. Why don't we start off by telling a little bit about ourselves?" Kakashi started

"Well what do you wanna know?"

"You know things you like, things you hate, hobbies, dreams of the future, stuff like that." He responded happily.

"Why don't you go first so we can get the gist of it Sensei?" Sakura suggested.

'Now that may have been the smartest thing you've said all day Pinky.' I thought.

"Me?" He blinked, or did he wink? Too confusing. "Well, my name is Hatake Kakashi, My likes and dislikes? Well, there are a lot of things I like and dislike. My dreams for the future? Never really thought about it I guess. And my hobbies… I have lots of hobbies." I twitched and was pleased to see that I wasn't alone in this action.

'Wow… I didn't learn anything there.' I thought with the smallest of laughs while Naruto and Sakura scoffed.

"He didn't tell us anything besides his name." Sakura whispered.

"Well look at that, the Scarecrow's got a sense of humor." I smirked. Kakashi blinked, looking at me in what I'm sure was uncertainty. Like I had said something disturbing, maybe even alarming. But what did I say? 'What's he staring at? His name does mean Scarecrow. Fuck, he even looks like a scarecrow.'

"You in the orange, why don't you go first." He suggested looking away again.

"I'm Uzumaki Naruto! I like the Raman Iruka-sensei buys for me, and my friend Angel!" I twitched again. 'WTF, he better not mean me!' "I hate the three minuets you have to wait while the Raman's cooking. My hobbies are trying different kinds of Raman and comparing them. And my dreams for the future! One day I'm gonna be Hokage. Then people will finally start giving me some respect and treating me like I'm a somebody, somebody important! Believe it!"

"That's a lot of Raman." I commented. Naruto looked at me trying to decide whether to take it as a complement. "And of course Raman being gods' gift to man kind; I can respect that." Naruto grinned.

'He's grown up interestingly.' "Okay then, next!" He pointed.

"My name is Honuro Sakura. What I like is, I'm mean who like is… uhh (glances at Sasuke) … m-my hobbies are… And my dream is…" Sakura squeaked.

"What do you hate?" The jonin put in hopefully.

"What I hate is NARUTO!" Naruto face planted. I wasn't sure whom to pat on the back for comfort. Naruto because of insult, or Sasuke because, well the insult and the fact that he had a stalker on the team. I chose Naruto, since his face was turning blue.

I knew what Kakashi was thinking, 'Girls her age are more interested in boys then becoming ninja.' I wasn't going to give that opinion of myself. Not if my life… well not if anyone else's life depended on it!

"Now you; the paranoid one."

I twitched again. OMG Stop with the fucking twitching!

"I can only assume you mean me." I stated with an exaggerated sigh. "My name is Irenara Yukari. I like being right, sharp objects, and an assortment of bands I know you've never heard of. I also have a soft spot for Ice cream, but that's irrelevant. I dislike being wrong, arrogant pricks, fan girls, and being underestimated, for whatever reason. She's a girl, she's short, she looks like a vampire, need I go on? My hobbies are, reading, training, singing, dancing etcetera. And my dreams for the future are confidential information. They involve a gay jerkoffy pedophile and the most torturous way to die my sadistic mind can come up with." The air around me darkened considerable before leaving as though it had never been with my next words. "Oh, and I want to live past the age of 21. I'd like to be able to drink legally before I die." I finished winking cutely. My speech had a few well placed raised eyebrows. I wasn't surprised, funny thing was; I didn't lie once.

"What uh, what's a vampire?" Naruto asked after a moment of silence.

"It's a creature of darkness that stalks in the night, craving for flesh satisfied when they suck the blood of humans, lavishing the warmth of the liquid as they rob life. A simple bite on the neck would suffice; with their fangs. It is said some can control the mind of man turning will into ash. Lestat or Dracula would be the most famous, never aging and shying away from the sun, for even the most powerful may fall pray to the rays, after a period of time. They are pale as ghosts, damned beings who have no soul. Honestly don't you people read Anne Rice!?" I said grinning from ear to ear. I was actually quoting something Tanner said to me once, he got me into Anne Rice after all; Kid's creepier then me, if you'll believe it; and more crazy since he sought me out for training! But now that I think about it that was an almost perfect description of Orochimaru. That snake bastard. Something about him… just so infuriating, like he did something to hurt me personally, but… how could he have? Besides I'd rather be stuck in a room with Lestat than him any day! "And for the record, just because I'm paranoid doesn't mean someone's not out to get me!" I hissed. I was joking, really, I was… maybe.

"Heh umm, okay that was very…

"Informative." I inserted a word for poor Kakashi.

"Exactly… um you next." How long do you think he can keep that sweat drop in place?

Sasuke was silent for a moment, hands folded neatly in front of his face while propped on his knees. "My name is Uchiha Sasuke. I don't particularly like anything. I dislike almost everything. My hobbies are training. And what I have is not a dream, for I am going to make it a reality. I will revive my clan, and kill a certain someone..."

Sakura: 'Sasuke is so hott!'

Naruto: 'Hope he doesn't mean me.'

Kakashi: 'Just as I thought…'

'Cryptic much.' I thought. 'If I didn't already know what he was talking about I say he was insane. Of course I'm one to talk. My introduction made me sound like a lunatic.'

"Well it looks like we have a very interesting team. Each of you with your own likes and goals. We'll have our first mission tomorrow." Kakashi said. I think he was smiling again, the way his one eye curved.

"What kind of mission is it?" Naruto asked; I quirked an eyebrow.

"It's something all five of us can do as a group!" Kakashi dragged out.

'Just tell them already!'

"What what what!?" The blond continued to whine.

"A survival exercise." The Jonin answered finally.

"But we just graduated from the academy I thought we were supposed to have real missions, not more practice. We already know this stuff, that's why we're genin now." Sakura complained.

"Oh, trust me this is going to be nothing like your other training." The scarecrow continued to smile crookedly.

"Oh well, so what kind of training is it?" Naruto questioned. Kakashi broke into laughter and I rolled my eyes.

"Wait that was actually a normal question, what's so funny?" Sakura asked in obvious confusion.

"Well I'll tell you the answer, but you're not going to like it." Kakashi sang, literally. I growled, low, but I'm sure he heard. "Of the twenty-nine graduates who just passed the academy exam, only ten will actually be accepted as genin. The others will be weeded out and sent back to the academy. In other words, this is a make-it-or-break-it pass or fail test and the chance that you will fail is at least 66 percent." I feigned a look of shocked horror since I didn't want to seem out of place. "See? Didn't I tell you, you wouldn't like it?" he chuckled.

"But that's not fair! We worked our butts off to get here. What was that graduation test for anyway!!??" Naruto shouted waving his arms dramatically.

"Oh, that? That was just to select candidates who might become Genin . . . or not." Kakashi answer lightly.

"WHAT?!" Naruto screamed. I couldn't help it.

"Fuck it, stop smiling you demented scarecrow!!!" I shouted.

"Language, Yukari, language. That's how it is, I decide whether you pass or fail. Be at the designated training spot at 5am and bring your ninja gear." Kakashi said, standing up and turning his back on us before adding. "Oh and tomorrow you'd better not eat breakfast or else… you'll throw up." And with that he disappeared.

"Tch, I'm eating anyway." I growled sticking my tongue out in Kakashis direction. "See if you can stop me from my Co-Co Puffs!" I turned waving a small goodbye to my new teammates; if I was going to make a name for myself I'd like the one with twisted views, haha. "It was nice meeting you all." I called. I bit my lip avoiding the edge of the building like a plague; wouldn't that just be the stupidest way to die? I'd take the stairs… just this once.

**----Later----**

Back at the Sakura tree I continued to change my bandages. Wincing slightly with a sharp intake of breath I painfully wrapped my left arm. My skin was soft but fragile, too fragile for such activities like punching a tree directly and repeatedly. My face distorted in disgust.

How could I be so stupid!? After all this time, all this crap, there were still people stronger then I. I knew that, so why had I overdone it? My stamina had only improved because of that bastard, my father. I hardly noticed I was fingering lightly my dagger, it was almost second nature for me and I spun the blade without receiving a cut. I never planned to let that man give me anything! And yet he had, and I had taken it, used it to my advantage. Finally growling in my fury I flipped it before flicking my wrist masterfully and sending the dagger hurling with a deadly accuracy into my Sakura tree.

At least I could still do that right. I smirked. My blade, 'winters frost,' my brother had called it, it was my first weapon, and I had mastered it in every possible way. It had become part of me, my being, as had Maya's gift. I was not so unlucky in my life to not have had loved ones. At a time I too had once been happy. Safe in the arms of a protective brother and proud in the embrace of a sweet baby sister. I was not as unfortunate as I could have been; something stupid Shakespeare had said about loving and loosing, I can't seem to remember anymore…

Now a days… I'm remembering less and less…

With a sigh I stood and pulled the blade from its spot in the tree. A light flashed as my hand graced the bark. Snow, I could see it. A young girl, she was running, crying. I could feel her pain. A forest, black, dead, hunted with memory; A flash of silver the ringing sound of metal meeting wood; Eerie laughter echoed in my otherwise silence.

I breathed heavily as the visions receded. Ripping my hand away I stumbled towards the streams edge, falling on hands and knees. "Kami-sama, it's really getting to me. I'm finally loosing it." I took one deep breath attempting to wash away all previous traces of panic and exhaustion for the sake of my mask. "Alright Yukari… ignore it!" I told myself. Heh heh, I had a bad habit of just ignoring things like this. I hadn't learned my lesson.

I hummed softly becoming lightheaded at the amount of air I kept breathing in. My brain was going loopy. Hee hee, loopy. For a brief moment I thought I saw Kanoke in the waters surface, laughing at me and my antics. How stupid. I flipped clumsily back into the tree without my usual grace and set my player to blast 'Akira' in my ears for the remainder of my time away. Tomorrow was gonna suck. "Tomorrow's gonna suck." I yawned. Sweat drop.

**Dreamish Thingy**

_Darkness weighed heavily on my eyes and my feet were dragged as though brought down by sand or water. The air was cold, a chilling effect that made me wonder if all feeling was lost due to the fact that I was numb. _

"_Yuka..." The sound was faint, a whisper even, like the soft chiming of bells in late summers breeze. "Yuka" Stronger this time and I felt a presence behind me. _

"_Who's there!?" I growled demandingly, whipping around as I faced dim lighting with only 'winters frost' in my hands. I had not realized I had the blade, but this was hardly a time for thought._

"_Hee hee… Yuka, you dumbass." Light flared leaving me blind for a moment before settling to a steady and eerie sunlight-like drape cast covered by grey clouds reviling my surroundings. It was strange, really strange, a forest of black and white, filled with trees devoid of leaves as though in winters set. A blanket of white prevented my swifter movements, snow, it was snow. Pure, untainted, by even the slightest pollution or the footsteps of another. Untouched by human and animal attempts alike. _

"_You can be so dense sometimes Yuka. You'd never know what you've been through, with the act you put up." I spun around, there was only one person I knew stupid enough to insult me and call me Yuka at the same time. _

"_Kano?" I blinked a couple of times before breaking into a side splitting laughter. She growled at me but I couldn't stop. "I'm, haha I'm haha Kanoke what are you wearing!!??" I Gasped. _

_Her cheeks puffed out indignantly only making her look even more comical. She wore a HUGE __PUFFY__ white winter coat that one could only wonder if it was inflatable and __puffy __lavender snow pants that matched __puffy__ gloves with two finger holes. The jacket had a light grey fur at the hood that was made visible easily as it was drawn up and over her hair. _

_She planted her hands firmly on her hips as her face turned red from what I'm sure wasn't the cold. "YUKA!!" I sniffed once and composed._

"_You look like a marshmallow." I snickered. _

"_Well some people aren't as positively insane as you Yuka! Some people don't like freezing weather and ungodly heat. Honestly it's freezing out here!!" She declared waving __puffy__ arms so dramatically she fell right over at weight change. My smile softened and I made my way over to her, extending a helping hand. She took it gratefully and stood brushing off snow. "Thanks." She mumbled. I waved it off easily before remembering something very vital._

"_Kanoke! Where the hell have you been!?" I shouted surprising her enough to send her flying backwards again. She didn't even get up this time as she laughed nervously and rubbed the back of her head. _

"_Heh heh, honestly I haven't a clue." I anime fell and we both got up. _

"You haven't a clue? _What the fuck do you mean, you haven't a clue!?" I yelled. _

"_I dunno, I sorta just ended up here after the whole T.V. thing." She replied. I twitched. "How long has it been?"_

"_Dunno." I shrugged. "Time woks differently in my coma." She looked at me in confusion and I think I even saw a question mark appear over her head. "Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, I'm in a coma right now!" I grinned smartly as though it explained everything._

"_You__'re not in a coma!" Kanoke declared. "You got out of the hospital then you went to jail and THEN I came over!" She listed and I shook my head. _

"_I'd expect figments of my subconscious to be against the idea of being fake but let's face it, there's no way this is happening." She simply stared at me clearly dumbstruck._

"_Okay… care to make your subconscious put me on a beach or something!!!?? It's freezing!!" I shrugged. I didn't know how control my damned subconscious. This proven on many points. _

"_How the hell can I do that? I can't even make my damn subconscious give me a wallet!" I stated. She blinked, I blinked, we blinked, yay for blinking!_

**BAM!**

"Ah!" I cried out as I found myself flying through the air. My eyes flew open and a groan of distinct agony passed my lips. Waves of shock rippled through my body clouded over by pain as I arched my back and tears pricked the corners of my eyes. The ache of yesterday was showing strongly, I was such an idiot! And now, after falling out of the tree I could feel my muscles tensing so sharply I thought surely they would rip.

The pain receded as I let my breath hiss slowly out between my teeth and the thing that hit me landed beside me. It was early, as had dawn already passed, but the sky still hung back with pink clouds. The only time I'd admit to liking the color was when it was attached to something like a flower, or the sky. Kanoke's face came to my mind. Had it all been just a dream, did I really miss her that much? I sighed, I didn't want to move, but I couldn't just stay here. As a test I lifted my arm, with difficulty, and bit back a grunt at how unbelievably heavy it had become; before letting it fall back down.

"Awe Fuck…."

I was lucky and made it to the clearing just before little Uchiha so no one was able to see me walking so carefully or settling myself down against a tree with such an embarassing hiss. I slowly unwrapped my arms and took out my newly acquired my medical tape.

Since I knew Sasuke had already seen the wounds it didn't really matter. But damn they looked as bad as they felt. I made sure my face didn't change out of pride as I wrapped my wounds and moved to my legs when I had finished; doubling the tape as some form of padding before putting the tape back in my pocket and pulling my jacket back on. Though the leather was heavy, it was about as useful as armor.

Then closing my eyes and putting on a wide smile creepily identical to that of Xelloss Mellenium, I turned to face Sasuke.

"Why good morning Uchiha-san!" Anyone but Sasuke, I was sure would have twitched. Damn him, I wish I could stop myself from twitching like that.

"Hn…" I fought back the twitch I knew was bound to come and nearly did my happy dance when I had prevailed. Nearly. Still smiling that mazoku's smile and so caught up in the moment, I was startled when the Popsicle, and get this, he actually spoke! OH MY GOD! Haha

"Doesn't it hurt?" he asked, though devoid of your every day's questions curiosity.

"Hm?" My brow furrowed, and I subconsciously kept my eyes shut tightly though my smile had been replaced. I feared he may have said something before I had realized he was speaking, so I may have missed the vital information behind the question.

"Your wounds." He finally explained though quietly and the grin returned full force.

"Now that doesn't really matter does it, either way I will be fighting today, and unless you've got some serious Vicodin on you…" I trailed off. He shook his head, and I sighed.

"Typical." He probably doesn't even know what Vicodin is.

"Good Morning Sasuke-kun!" I sighed as Sakura joined us on the bridge. "Oh… Hi Yukari…"

"Heh, nice to see you too Pinky." I said.

The time for Kakashi to show up had come and gone, with Sasuke and Sakura waiting expectantly and me lying down bored out of my skull. Naruto showed up only ten minuets late looking slightly disheveled, like someone who had missed very vital sleep time last night. After another 20 minuets I sighed; lord give me patience, and I want it NOW! To top it off I had the shoes song stuck in my head!!!

'Shoes…Shoes… Oh my god! Shoes… Shoes…Oh my god! These shoes rule… these shoes suck!... these shoes rule!... These shoes suck!!!' (If you've ever heard it, it's fucking weird!!!)

I shook my head, I was going insane!!! Sitting up I noticed everyone seemed rather agitated at something, Pinky was annoying Popsicle, Popsicle was annoying Orange Man, And Orange Man was annoying Pinky! Not to mention it didn't appear as though any of them had eaten breakfast, idiots! Well now I just felt left out. I stood, I felt good enough to walk without anyone noticing a difference, and Kakashi wouldn't be here for another… like two hours, I'll be back by then! I stepped lightly off the branch I had migrated to during my boredom and began my path down the road.

"I'll be back!" I called. Sakura seemed to be the only one who noticed.

"Hey where do you think you're going?! Sensei could be here any minuet! You can't just leave!" She protested. I stopped, turning to her with a frightening frown.

"When I say, I'll be back, I mean, I'll be back. Trust me when I tell you, we've still got time till he shows up." I replied. "So what does it mean when I say I'll be back?" I smiled again and Sakura looked slightly uneasy; didn't even try to answer. That's okay though, the talk had caught my other teammate's attentions as well. Naruto's hand shot up and my grin widened as I pointed to him.

"It means you'll be back!" He said excitedly.

"Precisely! Honestly Pinky, I expected more from one of Konoha's smartest genin konichi." I shrugged turning around and continuing on my way.

First store, weapons! Kakashi had said, 'bring your ninja gear' and let's face it, I didn't really have any! A bag; brown and seemly innocent, only I knew of its secret intentions to kill me! I smirked down at it in my hand and promised myself that this gift from god, or the devil considering how it smacked me in the face this morning and knocked me out of my tree on arrival, would be spent carefully.

I know what you're all thinking, shouldn't she have returned it? Oh come on, like I'm gonna pass up a bag full of cash when I'm completely broke, besides it hit me in the face! The way I see it, my subconscious finally decided to give me the wallet I had wanted, good old coma!

I grinned running inside and stopped at the entrance looking around with glittering eyes. Swords, daggers, stars, chains, and weapons I couldn't name if I tried. It was all so… sniff… beautiful. Yeah, I think I had drool coming out of my mouth.

"I've seen that look before!" Someone laughed. I blinked a couple times before slowly turning my head.

"Huh?" The daze hadn't completely left me and it would probably be awhile before I could speak in coherent sentences. Bare with me here. But what I did see was a man, early thirties; brown hair pulled back into a pony at the nape of his neck. His chocolate eyes danced with amusement and though he was by appearance no ninja he had a strong muscular frame and careful hands toughened by weapon handling.

"And I've defiantly seen that look before." He chuckled. I shook my head again realizing how stupid I was coming off. "You're just like my daughter." He explained. "Are you here to purchase anything in particular or would you like the tour?" He clearly wanted to give me the tour, you could just tell, but he was a good natured man and I wasn't really looking for anything in particular.

"Umm… nothing in particular…" I replied slowly. A second later I felt something grab onto my arm and with a sharp tug I was jerked away! WHIPLASH! I only faintly heard the man talking away in the background as he led me around the store. Odd, for I took in every word. I was introduced to the wonders of a mace, it looked so great, but let's face it, I had no where to keep it. It weighed a ton too so I couldn't just carry it.

Then something caught my eye. Glimmering a sheik mystic that made my stomach clench though I knew not why. I reached out my left hand and ran my finger tips along the blades edge. The surface was strangely warm to the touch yet powerful and welcoming in a way akin to 'winter's frost' and it was marvelous. I loved it on first sight; this blade so much like my own. It was longer though, the edges well cared for yet, and I smirked at this, not as sharp as my 'winter's frost.' I frowned slightly, there was a crevice on the hilt, where a jewel should have been, like the sapphire on my dagger. But still somehow that did not quite hinder its beauty in my eyes.

"And over here we have an acid edged kodichi that supposed…"

"I want it…" I whispered hungrily. "Please… tell me it's for sale." I never let my gaze leave the blade as my own crimson orbs peered back at me. I felt my heart breaking as I thought he'd say no but then,

"Oh it's for sale, but sorry ta say it'll cost ya a pretty penny." He whistled examining the sword but not reaching for it.

"I don't' care, how much?" I asked.

"You sure you can wield this thing? Kid your age; my daughters' one thing but she's been working with them all her life." Still he did not object as he unhooked the sword from its block and handed it to me. Almost by nature I balanced it on two fingers, checking its weight. It, it was perfect!

"AH!" I squealed in a fan girl fashion I'd normally be ashamed of. "I LOVE IT! Take the money out of this." I said tossing him the bag in no mood to have to dig. "I trust you." I explained while he laughed in mirth.

"Thanks for coming to 'The Sharpest Edge' please comeback anytime!" He was still laughing, but he was a good man and I wished him no ill will. I looked down latching the sheath to my waist and welcoming the weight… then I noticed something else… my watch read … AWE FUCK!"

"YOU'RE LATE!!!" I snuck up next to Uchiha as Naruto and Pinky shouted their brains out. I had only just made it and I hoped Kakashi hadn't noticed my absence. I sighed in relaxation as he gave some bullshit line about a black cat.

"You're late." I jumped at Sasuke's voice. I hadn't expected him to speak.

"Sure scold me," I grunted crossing my arms, "not the one who's famous for it…"

"Hn…" One wouldn't have to look to know there was a smirk on his face.

"You are unconvinced." It was a statement, not a question. "Tch, whatever, I have no desire to prove myself to you Popsicle."

"Pipsqueak... or do you prefer 'Shorty…'" I literally anime fell and the ground was hard on impact.

"Itai, you heard that whole conversation?" It was all I could do to hide the panic from my eyes but I was betrayed be the smallest squeak in my tone. Damn it. That stupid prick, had heard Ino's nickname for me.

"_Oh don't act so high and mighty pipsqueak!-"_

But did that also mean…?

"So…" His smirk grew. "Delicious huh?" I wanted to hit my head against a wall. And if my team hadn't been there, I'm sure I'd have hit it against that tree. No that one has thorns, I'd hit it against that one!

"_But ya never know, you should keep your eyes closed in case I act on how delicious his lips look and decide I'd like a taste…"_

Something between a groan and a sob escaped my lips in my discomfort. "I should have known better," I sighed shaking my head. "Tori has ears everywhere." I growled in a more composed manner than before. If I didn't have to put up with Tanner, this mask would never have come to be, and I may have very well have still been on the ground twitching.

"Well then, let's get started," Kakashi stated in a simple manner. Honestly if he got out of this ordeal with his hearing I'd be amazed. "Here we go," he pulled out a timer. "The clock is set for noon. Your mission is very simple. All you have to do is take these bells from me before time runs out! That's all there is to it." He said lightly, like it was the easiest thing in the world. And despite the fact that it did indeed sound easy to the untrained ear, when the situation was assessed a little better is seemed damn near impossible.

"If you can not retrieve a bell by noon, you will go without lunch. Instead you will be tied to a stump and watch as I eat your lunch in front of you!" I twitched as he did his little eye smile.

"Wha!!!" the response from Naruto was almost expected as everyone was sharing the collective thoughts on 'that's why he told us not to have breakfast.'

"You only need one bell and since there are three bells only; one of you will definitely fail. That one will be going back to the academy. But then again, all four of you could fail too. You can use your shuriken because if you don't come at me with the intent to kill me you won't get the bells." He finished.

"Ya, but you will be in danger sensei! You couldn't even dodge an eraser!" Naruto shouted.

"Class clowns are usually the ones with no skills. Dead last, Losers. It's safe to ignore them without the risk of injury." Kakashi said and I let out a hiss as though receiving a wound. 'Poor Orange Man.'

"When I say 'start' you may begin." No sooner had those words left Kakashi's mouth then Naruto had charged. There was flash, a cloud of dust, and then Naruto with a kunai pointed at the back of his head. "Slow down, I didn't say you could start yet." I barely saw him move, if you can count a flash as seeing it. Now I really wanted 'it,' I really wanted to see… how I measured up to this man… this Jonin. "But, since it seems you came at me with the complete intent to kill, I think I'm starting to like you guys." So carefree and calm, like he knows we're not a threat. Fucking Bastard.

"Ready." I tensed. "Start." We scattered.

I saw Sakura sprint to the brush and Uchiha speed to the trees; I followed him leaving Naruto behind so I could watch and wait for my chance. I don't think Sasuke realized how close I was. I enjoyed how little attention he paid to me, focusing solely on the jonin in front of him. I still wasn't sure how everything was going to play out but I decided that I would not tell them the main mission objection was teamwork. I'd let off hints and offer my help, but if they were only going to work with me because of the rules it would be faulty at best.

"Alright, it's just you and me now!" Naruto yelled, successfully drawing Kakashi's eyes.

"Honestly, the boy hasn't an ounce of stealth in his body." I whispered. Sasuke jumped jerking his head my way. I smiled lightly.

"What are you doing here!?" He hissed.

"Silly little Uchiha, I'm hiding." I explained. "Watching, adding much needed mood lightening commentary, etcetera." I waved my hand in an uncaring jester and distinctly heard him growl.

"Ooo!" I voiced pointing dramatically at Kakashi whose hand rested in his weapons pouch. We looked just in time to catch him pulling out that little orange book of his. Naruto faltered.

"Why are you reading that book!?" he shouted.

"Hm? Why? Why to find out what happens next in the story of course." I narrowed my eyes in quick realization, there it was clear to my well trained eye, an, an opening, well I'll be damned! Pumping charka into my legs and appearing behind our sensei. Looking over his shoulder I let out light laughter to hide my true intentions.

"And out comes the porn. My, my, I do believe our teacher is a pervert." I Xellos smiled at him

"Well hello there Yukari. Are planning to fight me as well?" He eerily eye smiled at me. And I thought _I_ was creepy.

"Awe, but what if I were to tell you I was a pacifist?" I commented thoughtfully stepping away and drawing out a kunai.

"Then I'd say you've chosen the wrong profession."

"Angel? What are you doing here?!" My gaze flickered to Naruto for only a moment and then went back to Kakashi.

"Care for a hand Orange Man? Or do you wish to try your luck first?" I balanced the Kunai on my fingertips easily.

"I want a shot at him! I'll make him pay for what he said earlier." He growled and I nodded in understanding.

"My talents are at your disposal should you need them got it, Kit?" He looked surprised for a moment but bobbed his head happily.

"You're going to let him fight me on his own?" Kakashi asked though if you listened you could hear a note of coxing.

"My dear Scarecrow it's still early in the game. We learn better from experience then anything else. And that little bit of knowledge, I believe, I shall not deprive him of." I two finger saluted then vanished in speed till I was with Sakura.

"Hiya Pinky." I said quietly and she jumped clutching her dress above her heart.

"DON'T DO THAT!!!" She tried, her voice barely above a whisper. There was silence for a moment before,

"You think it's impossible too don't you?" I hushed averting my eyes while trying to appeal to her intelligent side. She blinked in confusion as I voiced her thoughts. "Genin vs. Jonin. We don't stand a chance." She gritted her teeth.

"Maybe you don't, but Sasuke-kun," I cut her off.

"Enough about the Popsicle, He doesn't stand a chance either! I don't give a shit how great he is, how powerful. Our sensei is one of the elite. He's got a place in bingo book, famous for something he's not even going to grace our Genin eyes with. Ya, that's right, he doesn't need his most powerful moves to take us out!" I growled harshly.

"What do you propose!?" She asked daring me to come up with an idea and at the same time expecting my words to be those of an empty rant.

"Work with me, Pinky. You don't like me, I know that already, I'd be freaked out if you did, but you're smart, I'll give you that." There it was. The offer was up for grabs. But would she take it? She bit her lip and I could almost see a debate taking place behind those green eyes.

"I don't need _your_ help! If that's what you say, I'll just join up with Sasuke-kun and together we'll," I waved off the rest of her words.

"You fool, well, no one can say I didn't try. Oh my, it looks like it's getting rather serious out there." She looked to the scene and I was already gone. Only one person left, then back to Orange Man.

Kakashi was currently crouched on the ground behind Naruto a dangerous tiger hand seal in place.

"N-Naruto! You've got to get out of there!" I heard Sakura scream, it was nice to know that at least on some level, she cared.

"Too late." He sang "Hidden Leaf Technique: One Thousand Years of Pain!" Kakashi shouted and Naruto's face turned blue. Naruto was sent flying and my eyes watered with the effort of holding back laughter. Real laughter. I'm so mean.

A few soft squeaks escaped my trembling lips that alerted Sasuke that I had once again returned. And when he did see me my face was red and looked as though I was going to cry. Psh, that'll be the day, of course he assumed that something had upset me and of course being the prick he is, he didn't seem to care.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Jeez, so harsh. I let out a few ragged breaths trying to regain my composure sum what desperately.

"Nothing." I gasped. He rolled his eyes and it was suddenly very not hard to turn my amusement into a glare. I would not interrupt him for this part. Maybe seeing Naruto do an advanced jutsu would take him down a peg or two.

Naruto knelt sopping with water a determined grin flitting across his foxish face. "Don't count me out just yet. Angel's the only person who seems to think I can do this, and I'm not about to prove her wrong." I blinked, he didn't say that in the anime. Damn I was already changing everything.

Suddenly Naruto clones popped up and out of the waters all shouting with triumph. This didn't seem to phase the jonin till he was unexpectedly grabbed from behind. I felt a smile tug at my lips.

"HA! Never let your opponent get behind you, isn't that what you said sensei? You were so distracted you didn't even notice my clone sneak up behind you. And now that I've got you there will be no more running!!" Naruto yelled leading a right hook attack that should have hit its mark. Instead Kakashi was replaced with… Naruto???

That was enough I decided. Sasuke need see no more of poor Naruto's mistake.

"Kawarimi." I whispered catching his attention. "It's weird isn't it? What could he be thinking pitting a genin against a jonin, especially one as powerful as him. There's no chance in hell we could beat him." Sasuke's temper flared and I continued before he could argue. "Alone we are all weak in comparison. There's more then just and age difference there is experience and he has knowledge of our talents taking away most of the surprise." I reasoned. 'I'm a creepy stalker that knows everything!!!' I accused. Great I'm accusing myself. That's not healthy right?

"But perhaps we do not have to do this alone." There it was, the bait was set, 'here fishy fishy fishy.' Haha

"Explain." Hook line and sinker!

'Explain.' I mocked in my head, angering him, despite how amazingly fun it was, would not be a good idea right now. With a sigh I continued. "'United we stand, divided we fall.' Think about it, it makes sense once you do! We have our own strength and alone we are weak but together… We are a team now, a fam..." I couldn't stop my own wince as I knew he did his own. My family was just as dead as his, only… fresher. Unlike Sakura I would not speak harshly with Uchiha to get my point across, for instead of appealing to intellect, I was now dealing with the raw passion to win, something that had to be handled with extreme delicacy. "The point is we have to be there for each other, we need to help each other or we will all fail."

"I do not need your help to pass this test." He spat. I narrowed my eyes at the blunt arrogance. "I don't need another fan girl to screw up my plans. You will only weigh me down." He exclaimed.

A growl pressed at my throat and in a flash I held 'winters frost' pointed to his neck though looking him straight in the eye.

"Enough." His eyes widened but I paid no mind. "I'm not sure what to do right now. Hit you, or pity you. Having every girl your age want nothing more then your attention has severely warped your mind. You think that I will swoon over your smirk or that your face will be the last image that comes to me when I die. Poor Uchiha, your arrogance will be your downfall… it's not wrong to accept help you know…" I stated talking fast. "If you want to go up against a jonin, straight out of the bingo book, alone, with nothing more then what talent you posses now; if you truly believe yourself ready than spare me the insults. I am no fan girl and you have not yet seen a fraction of the power I possess." It was strange there was no anger in my voice, like I wanted nothing more then to get my point across. "I want to fight you." A simple statement that stirred an unknown emotion behind the boys abstain eyes. "But be warned, watch your step, for stray you too far out of the eagles shadow and there waits the snake to have you in its jaws." I withdrew the dagger. "Yes or no…" I repeated.

"…No."

"Then you will fail." I vanished.

**The prov. of the Popsicle lol**

"Then you will fail."

I felt like I had been slapped in the face with no mark to show for it. Not that anyone had had the audacity to actually slap me in the face before. Something in her words stung greatly. 'She has absolutely no faith in my talents.' She was so annoying. Her eyes made it even worse. The way they flashed with a mood change or turned a deeper shade of red with her words.

_Sharingan eyes. _

Damn eyes, they made me think of _him. _And yet… I hadn't thought of him during the conversation, not once. _"I want to fight you." _How powerful was she?

My eyes widened. There was my chance. Kakashi had dropped his guard. "I will get a bell, and you better get one too," I tightened my grip on my kunai. "Yukari Irenara."

**My Prov.**

'That arrogant, self centered, power hungry, prick!" I seethed jumping branches fast. "Damn the Uchiha pride! I offer up a hand of help and this is what I get!? That's the last time, I swear. The last fucking time I do something like that. If he wants to fail he can go right a fucking head and do it!" I didn't care that he would pass anyway, they all would, it was bound to happen.

Still I had to get to Naruto, he was just hanging there. 'Come on Popsicle,' I thought. There, at least the damned Ice cube was good for something! Sasuke had taken his shot and I bit my lip and winced at the sight of the suriken hitting our sensei. I knew he had used the replacement technique bit still…

I shook my head. No time for that.

"Hiya kit." I said smiling at the struggling boy only a branch beneath me. Naruto looked up with that cute clueless look.

"Huh?" I chuckled slightly and cut the rope that held him by his ankle. "Ah!" He yelped sprawling on the ground where he had fallen on his ass. "A-Angel!!??" He shouted springing up on his feet to look up at me. My smile grew to a grin and I back flipped on the ground before him in a salute.

"At your service! Hey, didn't I tell you to call if you needed my help?" He grinned sheepishly and laughed. "Orangeman you need to learn to ask for help, it's not gonna kill you!" I lectured though quite frankly it wasn't hard to tell that I didn't really care. "Now come on, we need to get a bell or we won't get lunch at all!" Naruto seemed to blink at this then he quickly snatched my wrist and started running.

"Uhh… Kit, where we going!" I yelled and his grin widened as we reached the posts.

"See, if we eat now, Kakashi-sensei can't stop us from having lunch!" Maybe I had let Naruto fall a little too hard back there.

"I don't think that's such a good idea." I said with a twitch. "Couldn't we just work together and get the bells that way?" I said hopefully.

"But this is a short cut, Angel-chan! It's perfect."

"When you say short cut, you mean cheating." I said flatly.

"Not cheating, improvising!" He exclaimed picking up a lunch. I shook my head.

"Do you even know what that word means?" He laughed a bit nervously and I rolled my eyes, but smiled all the same, he was just too cute to stay mad at. "I'm sorry, but I still want a shot at the Scarecrow, so uhh… enjoy your lunch!" He looked disappointed, but not much considering there was Raman waiting for him.

I perched in my place in a tree waiting for my signal. It came in the form a high pitched shriek and my lips curved cruelly at the noise. I took off. It appeared everyone was going to meet their destined fate whether I had decided to interfere or not. Then again I suppose I hadn't tried that hard. Words are sometimes not better then actions, and the real me would have dragged Naruto away to form a plan, smacked Uchiha over the head a few times till he saw things my way, and socked pinky in the face for the hell of it before telling her that Sasuke was in on the plan. She'd join right after. Then we'd have had a chance. But well, I said it in the beginning I'd let them learn from experience. I sighed at her passed out form and nudged her carelessly with a toe. I shook my head in disapproval. This was our genjutsu expert? 'Tch, we're doomed, lol.'

/Doom, doom, doom, doom, doom, doom, doom, doom/

(SLAP!) No time for mental fun!' I scolded.

/But there's always time for mental fun!/ that damn other voice whined.

'Haven't heard from you in a while.' I commented thoughtfully. I was secretly glad to have inner me back. Even if she was how do you say, a bit of a ditz at times she was good conversation.

/No creepy psychologist is gonna stop me from talking to my Bubbles-chan!/ I twitched. Bubbles, why me?! I looked back down at Sakura and bent to retrieve her. /Let's leave her/

'Tch, I wish, not this time though.'

/What a pain, you're too nice bubbles-chan/

'I know.' I sighed. I carried Sakura with me to a clearing I knew a fight was being held. No, I'm not that much of a stalker, you could pretty much hear it. I literally had a debate with myself on whether or not I'd be considered a bad teammate if I just kicked her the rest of the way there.

By the time I actually got there they were really going at it. Well Sasuke was, but every thing he threw at the Jonin no mater how fast or how strong was always dodged or blocked. His grand fireball jutsu had to be the best part of the whole thing. Again a jutsu that I was very familiar with but I hadn't tried. There were lots of them. And had I not totally warned him about this and VERY generously offered a helping hand to him I may have actually felt bad for that conceded prick; so close and yet so far from getting that bell.

Pity really.

I watched as the battle was brought to an end with Uchiha's head sticking out of the ground. It looked funnier in person. "Now or never." I sighed.

**A/N: **Well I think I'm just gonna stop ya there! What did you think of the introduction? Lol. I'm just about done with chapter 5 but let's face it, I'm evil and I'll probably update sooner then I did last time. Again sorry for taking so damn long. But well whatever. Please Review!! **Next Time on Fuck I Think My TV's Broken; **fighting, lectures, metaphores, food glorious food, deepening the bonds, Hyugas, interviews, and… mommy help me, Sasuke's being weird! next time in **Chapter 5 Now or Never.**

_Sasuke__ - "You completely missed the point." _

_Yukari __- __"Actually sometimes I think I may be the only one to catch the point. Everyone else has to have it repeatedly stabbed into them till it practically draws blood. I unlike you, actually ate breakfast, I unlike you, do not need to be eating lunch." _

_Sasuke__ - "You, unlike me, are bleeding everywhere." _


	5. Now or Never

**A/N: **Hey guy's, it's been while. I'll make this short since only like a fourth of you people actually read these damned things. Here it is; Yukari V.S. Kakashi and I decided to throw in some Hinata as well. I know I'm sorta dragging this out but bear with me here, unless it really bothers you, in which case feel free to complain! Lol. Oh and sorry about Kakashi's name, I know I can't spell, I think I'm getting worse… that's not something I should brag about is it? Anywho I said I wasn't gonna make this long, man I'm a hypocrite.

**Disclaimer: **Do I look rich enough to own Naruto??? To those of you who said no (glares) at least you're honest. To those of you. who said yes… I like you already!

**Chapter 5**

**Now or Never**

**(Who we are and how we've tried, taking every step in stride, it's now or never to decide)**

"Tsk, tsk, Uchiha. So close and yet so far." I started, walking up to the two and waving a finger in a reprimanding fashion.

"Why Yukari, so you've decided to come out at last." I wasn't surprised, what kind of jonin would Kakashi have been had he not been able to sense my unmasked presence.

"Ah yes, I must admit, Popsicle did better then my predictions but still I'd have helped him if he hadn't so clearly stated what a hindrance I would be." I replied stopping with a pout just barely sort of glare.

"That's an interesting reason for not helping a teammate." Scarecrow commented. I narrowed my eyes; clearly he didn't see how much my pride meant to me.

"Hey, hey, hey, dude, I not the bad guy here!" I protested. "I offered my help to every one of them and I'm gonna tell you now; what a waste of my time. Although… I can't say I don't know the reason for this test without it being a total lie and I already know we've failed quite miserably."

"Not necessarily." Kakashi said. "You could still get a bell."

"Is that so?" I chuckled taking the fighting position I had used back in the forest and turning my wince into a blink as the muscles strained. I ran at him using only natural speed, throwing a punch I knew he would block followed by a series of kicks. He blocked them as well but I made sure there was a hell of a lot of force in them! He better damn well have felt them!

"You take me for a fool, Scarecrow?" I hissed aiming a kick at his feet that was dodged and easily turning the move into a back flip as he counter acted with his fist. "It was never about the bells." I stated skidding back a few steps after my landing.

"So you have figured it out." I nodded. "Well, if you know it's already over then why bother fighting me?" My face took on a predatory smile, one I used for Tanners more harsh training sessions.

"I suppose the right answer to that question would be something like 'Never give up, never surrender?'" His eyebrow rose.

"I didn't think you were that kind of person Yukari-chan… it's so…"

"Corny?" I finished. "I said that's the right answer not MY answer. Keep up with me here. It's because I want to see… How I measure up to you… a jonin, in the bingo book if I'm not mistaken; which I can assure you I'm not. And with an interesting… talent for jutsus, if you get my meaning." His eye widened and returned so quickly I had almost missed it… almost.

"Yes." I mused. "There are three very different types of smart." My stance slumped as I brought my hand up to show one finger. It was strange to find myself teaching again even after my works with Tanner, but I guess old habits die hard. "There's 1. Book smart. The knowledge found in written form, aka our little Haruno. Then there's 2." Another finger came up. "Common Sense, I don't think I need to explain this one, but you'd be surprised how many people don't have it. Example:" I walked over to Sasuke, suddenly feeling uncharacteristically giddy, and brought my foot up to rest on his head somehow changing my two fingers into a distinct peace sign, complete with Xelloss smile! Sasuke's eye distinctly twitched and I could not help but smirk inwardly. "Our little Ice Cube!

"And finally 3," The last finger rose. "Street smart. The knowledge of things around you, people, backgrounds, organizations, connections, and some very interesting things I'd have to say. Now, I'm not much of a book smart person; prefer fiction actually, and my science class never quite came out of that B. And let's face it, my common sense left me for a job in Miami, leaving some ditz who calls me bubbles-chan in its place. But I know my surroundings. Tests, school, these things mean very little to me, but I shall take them and I shall pass all the same, for they are essential if I wish to get by in life. This test however is something… a little more personal. A little more helpful. And a little more satisfying. For once I do believe you've got my attention, cherish this moment, it won't happen often."

"Bubbles-chan?" Did the gravity suddenly increase? Cuz, I was now fighting the urge to anime fall… and loosing! That's all he had to say? Really? God, I talk too much. I moved my foot from Sasuke's head only again remembering that it was there. Then I drew out a blade I knew all too well, a blade I had mastered, a blade I loved, my brother's gift, my 'winters frost.' It seemed to quiver in my hands at finally being used for fighting purposes.

"Heh heh, it has been far too long." I whispered. "I talk too much." I disappeared, aided by the chakra at my heals, and reappeared behind Kakashi, not too say he wasn't ready, or at least I hoped he was. I slashed with experienced hands at his Kawarimi and felt just in time the leg swinging at my face. I ducked slightly and held his foot in a block.

"Not bad." He brought his heal down harder, trying to break my hold with an enormous amount of pressure but still I held. "Not bad at all." Tch, my arms were screaming; yesterdays wounds stretched in a threatening way as though they wished to reopen. I had to get out of this, though I could hold him now, I knew I would crumple if chakra was put into play. I darted out from underneath him twisting gracefully in a blade dance I hadn't done in a long time. I took my chance for the bells but grabbed onto something a little bit different. His foot stopped before hitting the ground, showing what amazing control he had over his own strength.

"Tiejutsu?" He commented. "That's strange for a konichi."

"Porno? That's strange for a jonin." I said, waving what I had stolen before him. "I wonder… if I said 'give me a bell or the book gets it,' would you give one to me?" His eye narrowed. "But that would be totally cliché." I tossed it to him and my wish was granted. For that split moment his hands were occupied and though my right hook was dodged my kick flew true into his chin.

/Fuck ya!!! That's my girl!!!/

'Hells yes!'

He hardly moved, this ticked me off greatly, and somewhere in the background I could hear Sasuke gasp. I had forgotten about him. Kakashi almost grimly put the book away rubbing his chin thoughtfully.

He let on a barrage of hits that I barely dodged and blocked in time. The tune changed and his foot hit home like mine, only in my stomach. I almost screamed and my stitches strained. Choking I managed a backwards handspring to bring me to my feet again before immediately being put on defensive. The few hits I actually got in seemed to have no effect on his arms, which I gotta say couldn't have been normal.

I brought 'winters frost' into a crescent moon sweep forcing him to dodge. In truth I had hoped to trip him but he jumped easily over my leg.

I twisted into a roundhouse kick, blocked.

A slash with the dagger, dodged.

A left hook, blocked.

A butterfly blade attack; dodged… no wait. A thin line of blood appeared beneath Kakashi's eye, I had clipped him… he didn't seem happy. He switched to offensive; he was faster now, seeing how fast he could go till I wouldn't be able to keep up. Kicks, punches, I blocked and dodged the majority, but as they got faster I found this impossible to keep up.

I gasped, soaring backwards across the ground with the force of his kick. It happened; I gasped feverishly as my stitches ripped right out of place and I could feel the blood freshly marking my bandages. Determinedly I drove the blade into the ground and used it to swing around and kick back at him. He dodged this as well.

"So the bandages aren't for decoration. Looks like our fight is taking its toll." He stated eyeing me wearily for moment, absolutely no change in breath.

"Heh, you wish. This is nothing compared… to… last week." Ya, broken bottles seem to only get sharper each time they hit you.

"Your fighting style is strange." He stated.

"How so?" I looked at him oddly from the ground.

"Unlike most ninja you don't use as much chakra in hand to hand. The average nin uses his chakra without realizing it to deliver the same blows as you." I couldn't decide whether or not that was a good thing. "This could prove either good or bad for you."

'Well there you go.'

"It strengthens your muscles and prevents depletion, however, should you need quick axis to your chakra it would be difficult to get to."

"Heh, not if I practiced. Being able to turn your chakra on an off at the flip of a switch, useful, ne?" I comment, trying to sound at least threatening through my labored breaths. He sized me up trying to find the truth and I think he believed me. Haha sweet. God I'm so dead if he proves me wrong.

"Do you only know Tiejutsu?" He asked as I rose from the floor.

"No, but if I resorted to actual jutsus... this beautiful clearing would be destroyed." It was a bluff. There were so many destructive jutsus that I knew, but I hadn't tried them yet, that didn't mean I never would. "Why? So eager to see my powers are you, Scarecrow? How about a lower jutsu level then? An appetizer per say."

I put 'winters frost' between my teeth and started something I prayed would work. Rat, tiger, dragon, snake, boar, bull, dragon.

I got lucky.

Chakra pulsed through my body letting loose a wave as the grass became frosted over completely and the leaves that had been floating in the air without support dropped like stones. The air became cold and ones breath could be seen as crystal shards formed around me. Kakashi felt his hair stand on end. "Ice Crystal Barrage!" I shouted and the shards, as though reacting to the command, flew toward Kakashi. He used a kunai to block most of them finding that they did not in fact break upon contact, so only a few nipped at his clothes and fewer still drew blood, if any.

It had worked, and I was getting more confident. This was a little bit less strenuous to my wounds though it practically killed my chakra. "So you break my Ice. Now break my fire!" I challenged. I started the hands seals to the mystic fire flower jutsu and had I been thinking strait, which trust me I wasn't, I'm sure I would have realized, that I needed to practice that one first, considering its more advanced placement. I didn't have enough chakra, and even if I could summon up the necessary amount, I still would have failed.

This wasn't something that just came to you; this wasn't something that could be done on the first try. I was on the high people call luck. Which deranged my brain into thinking luck would be on my side no matter what, one word, dangerous. Kakashi tensed even more as he recognized the hand signs and just then, just before I finished… Luck… my watch went off.

**Beep beep, beep beep, beep beep.**

"Awe." I pouted. "That means I gotta wrap this up." The Scarecrow sweat dropped. I was going to take another chance, my last one. I dove for the ground landing painfully on my side but smirking through it and yanking hard on the chakra thread I had seized. Instantly a bell flew from Kakashi's waist and I fumbled clumsily with it for a moment before grasping it fully in triumph. His eyes widened and I shakily stood.

"When did you… oh… heh, I should have known."

"_And out comes the porn. My, my, I do believe our teacher is a pervert." I Xelloss smiled at him._

"Yep, you were too busy with Naruto and Icha Icha Paradise to notice." I started in a low tone I only used in my most exhausted moments. "I didn't have time to take the bell, you'd have noticed, but from that very short distance I was able to imprint a light chakra signature onto the bell. With the real enemy I'm certain you'd have noticed, but with mere genin and only one eye you underestimated me." I explained. "And even if you did know, you let me get away with it. In all honesty I couldn't have done it without Orangeman, though he didn't know I suppose that's a slight form of teamwork, ne?"

"You could have taken it at any time." He stated simply.

"Awe, but then we'd never have been able to fight, I wanted to see if I could get one without Naruto's distraction, sadly though time is not with me so I suppose that'd classify as a no." He smiled, I know he did.

"What happened to that cute little girl that couldn't even throw a kunai?" He laughed. I blinked. When the hell had we ever ment before for him to be saying something like that?! I bet I could throw a kunai on my first try! Ya! (So I'm a little full of myself, who isn't?) Maybe he was just assuming… ya that's probably it. And then the bell rang and Kakashi disappeared, but still I found the answer at my lips.

"She died…" My wounds suddenly hurt more, my heart seemed to ache, but it wasn't racing anymore, in fact it seemed to have slowed. Then as if waking up from a very weird dream, a sneeze brought my attention to Sasuke who was trying and failing to dig himself out of his hole. Pinky was unconscious in the tree I had left her in. Shouldn't she have woken up by now??? I didn't kick her THAT hard… ish. Haha. I shook my head walking over to Uchiha.

"My, my, what an interesting predicament." I said my hands on my hips.

"Whatever." He growled. I blinked once, then twice. He really wasn't gonna ask for my help was he? Damn, so much for my, 'So you want my help now do you?' speech. 'Ruin my fun.' I thought. I knelt down and began to assist in digging him out. He stopped dead, and for a moment I thought he was gonna bite me. How funny would that be?

"What are you doing?"

"Are you blind?" I laughed lightly in real amusement. "I'm helping you get out. We're a team, gotta look out for each other ya know? It's gonna be hard to do with your head sticking outta the ground like that." I commented. I expected him to say something along the lines of, 'I don't need your help,' and I would retort 'stick it in your ear chicken ass hair,' but he didn't. He however grumbled quite a bit, what I could only guess to be obsanities, under his breath. "Chin up Uchiha, I won't leave ya hang'en." I don't know where the words came from.

/heh heh, chin up, his head above ground,/

'I know!'

I frowned when he didn't reply. "Seriously you almost got one…" What the hell am I supposed to say!??!?

/Be yourself (tee hee)/

(Twitch)

/ha-ha you twitched/

(Glare) (Intent to kill)

/Ahhhh!/

"Look Popsicle, I'm not good at this whole cheer up grumpy guy thing. In fact I'd have to say my pessimism makes me suck at it harder then most. So what do you want to hear? Evaluation perhaps?" I seem to have caught his attention. "You should have just teamed up with me. You are strong Uchiha, arrogant, but strong; an idiot, but still, strong. You touched a bell that a Jonin was holding, executed a jutsu far beyond your level, what's more with apparent ease, and… uhh..." He was still glaring at the ground in anger, I hadn't helped one bit. "Okay you know what I give up. I suck at this and you're clearly a lost cause. You want to stay here and sulk, you ahead Ice cube, sulk to your hearts content." I stood and walked out of his range of vision. After a moment he seemed to think I had gone and I watched his ears turn pale, the sign of blood draining from ones face.

"Yukari? …" He looked all cute and panicky.

/???… cute…???/

"Yeppers!" I announced appearing within a very close proximity of his face, with my arms propped neatly on my elbows. "You didn't really think I had gone did you? Tsk, tsk, I promised not to leave ya hang'en didn't I?" I smiled Cheshire-like and continued what I had started in digging him out.

The corner of my lips twitched slightly at the Uchiha whose hair thanks to my jutsu was positively covered in frost. When I was done I didn't offer a hand to him and let him stand on his own, if only for the sake of his pride.

"Arg, I wasted too much time." He growled brushing himself off. I took a step towards him I reached up a hand and ran it down his hair, collecting frost and bits of snow. "What…?"

"Hmm… heh, good thing I didn't start with a fire jutsu, ne?" I commented, more to myself then to him, as I watched the flakes start to melt. I blew what was left into his bewildered face like confetti. "Come on, I an't carrying Pinky."

**------------------------------------------------ ------------------ --------------------------------------**

"Uh-oh, is that your stomachs I hear growling?" Kakashi said, a little too happily if you ask me. "Because not one of you, save Yukari, were able to retrieve a bell."

"Wha! Angel-chan, you got one!!" Naruto shouted. I nodded but kept a blank face as the other two shot me glares. What was supposed to happen now? Something told me I hadn't taken my own advice. I hadn't played the 'perfect anime character,' though I certainly gave my share fair in amount of speeches.

"However I see no need to send you guys back to the academy, you obviously don't deserve to be there." I forced myself not to wince at the statement.

"So does that mean…"

"We passed?" Sakura finished Naruto's question. "But all I did was scream and pass out, does that count for anything?"

/ I liked her more when she wasn't talking/

'Hn.'

/Let's knock her out again!/

'No.'

/Please Bubbles-chan!/

'Well…' I faked temptation. 'No.'

/Whaa!!!!/

'Ugh, I can't believe you're me.'

/Why do you keep me locked away bubbles-chan, it's more fun to be yourself!/

'It's dangerous to be yourself.'

"You are being dropped from the program permanently!" A sudden tension choked the air around us.

"Drop us from the program! That means we can never become ninja! You said that if we couldn't take the bells we'd be sent back to the academy! You can't just change your mind and kick us out! Why would you do that?!" Naruto snarled, in what I was amazed to notice, one breath.

"Because you don't think like ninja, you think like little kids. Like brats." The scarecrow lectured, but to be honest I was wondering what happens to ME now.

/EXCUSE ME!? Let me at him, let me at him!/ But apparently inner me was paying attention.

Anger flashed so clearly in Sasuke's eyes it was startling. In a moment he had charged, and in that same moment, he was already face down courteously of Kakashi.

"Sasuke!" Sakura cried.

"You don't know what it means to be a ninja. You think it's a game, huh? Why do you think we put you on squads? Did you consider that question for one moment?" He questioned. Rather harsh actually. "You didn't even realize what the exercise was about. Not even close!"

"The real… I wanted to ask you from the beginning!" Emerald eyes widened.

"How are we supposed to know!? We don't make the rules!" Orangeman shouted.

"Teamwork." Kakashi stated.

"Wait a minute! You set it up with four people but only three bells. If we worked together and got the bells only three of us could keep them and that would lead to group conflict and the squad would break up."

"Exactly. I purposely pitted you against each other. I wanted to see if you could overcome that and put the squad ahead of yourselves. A genin should have a natural feel for teamwork but you; it never even crossed your mind." Everyone shifted uncomfortably. "Sakura: There were countless times you could have helped Naruto but you were too focused on Sasuke, who wasn't even in danger. Naruto: You just went barreling head on determined to do everything by yourself. And Sasuke: You thought the others were so far beneath you, they were worthless. Arrogance. Ninja missions are carried out in squads. Of course you need individual skills, but teamwork is the most essential element. Every shinobi understands this, when individuals put themselves above the squad, this can lead to failure and death.

"Teamwork is everything. For example." He flipped up Sasuke and held a kunai at his neck. Sakura's breath hitched. "Sakura kill Naruto now, or Sasuke dies." That had an effect. Fear. This was the kind of thing that could happen in the future, accept this was only a taste. "What do you do?"

"I-I."

"Well that's not fair." I spoke, fuck I wanted to know what was gonna happen to me! "Pinky cannot kill Kit." She turned to face me, and shook my shoulders.

"What are we supposed to do, we couldn't just let Sasuke die!" She cried.

"The risk is too great. Nine out of ten times the enemy will kill Uchiha anyway. We are faced with the split second decision that either we somehow save the Popsicle or he dies. In our current condition, sorry to say it Ice Cube, but you're already dead." I said bluntly but with a heavy lidded gaze that showed I was contemplating something. "The outcome of not working as a team could be devastational." My eyes flickered and connected with Sasuke's. One second. Just the one. I had already thrown 'winters frost' and Sasuke had already fallen forward out of harms way. Kakashi made no move to pick him, the kunai or 'winters frost' up again.

"That was very risky Yukari." Our sensei warned in a very low tone. "You could have killed Sasuke." I narrowed my eyes.

"Ya, what the hell was that!? Way outta line Yukari!" I ignored Sakura.

"Do not insult me, sir. I have never before missed with 'winters frost.' I do not plan to start now." Our eyes locked and I felt my pride roar in approval. "In a real situation, that is what I would have done. Teammates should trust one another should they not? He was dead anyway, even if, even if by some ridged chance I had killed Uchiha, you'd be disarmed, and Naruto would live."

**Flashback **

"_Ah! Kakashis' gonna kill Sasuke!" Maya declared waving her orange Popsicle around frantically._

"_Don't worry Sasuke can't die, he's one of the main characters, right Yuka-chan?!" Kanoke laughed patting Maya happily._

"_Ya, pity really." I sighed licking vanilla Ice Cream. The 8 year old looked up at me with curious blue eyes._

"_You don't really mean that do you Yuki?" I blinked once then twice. _

"_Why would I say it, if I didn't mean it?" I asked avoiding the question. I didn't mean it, what's a plot without main characters? Bloody confusing that's what! But that was easily hidden beneath a mask and some Ice Cream._

"_YUKA!" Kanoke gasped whacking me upside the head. I choked violently but otherwise glared at the girl. I had only known her a few months and already she had me pegged as a softy on the inside. Tch, ya right. "Don't you worry about it Maya-chan, Yukas' just saying that cuz she lurvs Sasuke!" Maya's eyes grew wide as the glare intensified one hundred fold and I flicked Kano's nose hard. She started crying anime tears. "Yuka how could you hurt your friend like that! You're so mean to me!" _

"_You like Sasuke, Yuki!? Really?!?" I palmed my forehead in exasperation and moved next to the girl on 'God Damned Sofa.'_

"_No Maya, Kano is just a little delusional. You know I like Panda-chan, and he's defiantly NOT a prick like Uchiha." I nodded smartly and she quickly joined me._

"_This coming from someone who thinks and S-class criminal is hot!!!" Kanoke huffed._

"_What?" I shrugged smiling goofily. "He is." Kanoke anime fell._

"_Oh, and what would you do if Kakashi asked you instead of Sakura!? Huh, great one? Would you leave the prick to die!" Kanoke asked. "What a sad way to go, abandoned by Yuki 'the heartless.'" I raised my eyebrows at the title but otherwise let it be._

"_Not at all. I would disarm him, and if the Uchiha prick died in the process, well that would only be bonus." I replied taking another lick of the rapidly melting cone._

"_No, no. Yuki is too nice to do that. She would be able to take on even Kakashi, cuz Yuki is the greatest ever!" Maya exclaimed waving her arms dramatically. My gaze softened considerably. Despite the fact that I seriously doubted my ability to take on Kakashi as a ten year old, she had amazing faith in me. "That's right, cuz my Yuki protects me, always, and, and, she never ever lets people down, even someone like Sasuke! Right Yuki!?"_

"_Heh, I think you've had a little too much sugar Maya."_

**End of Flashback**

'Maya…'

"Yukari." Kakashi gave me a studying gaze and I stood as strongly as possible under it.

"What am I going to do with you?" I anime fell. He didn't even know, well that sucked.

"You were able to get a bell." I nodded weakly. "And you did offer a helping hand." Nod again. "What to do… I should pass you. However you could have helped Sasuke back there and what you just pulled was extremely dangerous. Then again I did say if you got a bell you would pass." Would he just choose already. "So, because you got a bell you pass-ish and will be sent back to the academy as opposed to never becoming a shonobi." And still, that didn't really tell me what was going to happen next.

"So the bell is what passes me?" I asked. "That's all?" He nodded a yes and my curiosity grew. After watching Naruto for so long, I had my own question picked out, it's like being able to think before you speak. "So if I were to, I dunno, give this bell to Orangeman would I fail and he pass in my place?"

Sakura blinked. "What kind of question in that!?"

"An honest one."

"But what does it have to do with anything!?"

"Everything, Pinky. Since Scarecrow is so fond of scenario situations I'll use one too." I held up the bell. "Alright Pinky, It's just you, Popsicle, Orange Man, and me. We are all trapped in a room with no escape. A poisonous gas has been released and I'm the only one with a gas mask. The rest of you, I don't know how, I don't care why, have lost yours. This gas will kill us upon inhalation. Now I can either: give the mask away and die while saving someone's life, or I can use it for myself and watch you all parish. The bell has become the lifeline. Should I choose to give this to Orange Man, would he advance where I fall?"

"Ya, but why choose Naruto?" I rolled my eyes.

"Cuz he's cooler then you and Popsicle." Sakura's eyes bulged at the statement and I swear I could see steam raising from her head.

/How ya like me now Pinky?/

Kakashi sighed not answering my question and my eyes followed his form over to a black monument. "Did you guys look at this stone? The names engraved on it?" I cast my eyes to the ground as the air again changed. "They were all ninja who are honored as heroes in our village."

"That's it! That's it! That's it! Now I know!" Naruto suddenly shouted and I felt myself wince. "I've decided that I want my name engraved on that stone! I'm not going to live and die for nothing like a dog! I'm going to be a hero! A hero!" For once, just this once I held my tongue. It is true I almost always have something to say, an opinion… but this… there was so much memory, so much pain, thick to the point of where one could taste it.

"They are a… special kind of hero…" Kakashi continued softly.

"What kind of hero are they!! Come on tell us!"

"They are all…" And the last three letters I mouthed to myself as he spoke them. "K.I.A."

"That sounds really cool!" Naruto shouted again. Could he just lower his voice, I felt like, like…

"You really think so? K.I.A. means Killed In Action. They all died Naruto." Realization dawned at Sakura's words, and Naruto fell silent, just like everyone else.

"This is a memorial, to all those who died. Some of the names of my closest friends are engraved here." I felt an unfamiliar stinging sensation at the corners of my eyes. Had I been so selfish, had I forgotten that he too had suffered. Obito, Rin. He had lost them as well. Did that mean… what was his purpose? Had he found another? Did that mean… could I also find another purpose?

"I will give you all one more chance." His voice hardened, how could he pull that off? "But this time, I will make it harder on you. You will have three hours to get a bell. Eat lunch to build up your strength, and then we will continue. Naruto doesn't get any, it's his punishment since he broke the rules and tried to eat by himself. If anyone feeds him that person automatically fails. Got it?" He vanished.

Damn, hate to say it, but that man sure can scare someone when he wants to. Not that I'm scared!

/Tch, Ya right!/

"You, Shut up!'

**----------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------------------------**

I idly fingered the apple in my hand. Not having brought a proper lunch I wondered just how fucking long it would take for the other two to realize the point for this little break.

Meanwhile: "This is no big deal, I can go without eating for days, for weeks! Believe it! This is no big deal!" Naruto's stomach growled loudly again before he added weakly, "No problem."

"heh, heh," I laughed softly, as Sakura pulled the lid off the Raman container. The smell wafted over to the blond boy and his stomach cursed its owner yet again. Truly did I have to do everything by myself. "Alright Kit," I said standing up, but before I could even offer I noticed Sasuke's hand up in a defeated fashion, his lunch at Naruto's disposal.

"S-Sasuke, What are you doing?" Sakura asked, wasn't she supposed to be smart???

I smiled and clapped my hands together. "I had no idea you could be so nice Popsicle!" My closed eyes prevented me from seeing his face.

"Kakashi's gone, we need to get that bell as a team," He simply said.

"But, Kakashi-sensei said…" My hand twitched, would anyone really care if I punched her???

"If Naruto's hungry he will be weak and ineffective, and that hurts the team and jeopardizes the mission." Sasuke said looking up and smirking. Sakura gave a determined look before she too offered up her lunch saying some stupid shit about being on a diet. I sighed. She stood with her chopsticks in hand.

"You need to eat too." I blinked at Sasuke in mild confusion.

"Er, what ya talking about?" He kneeled next to me shoving his lunch into my hands. I blinked once then twice.

"You didn't bring a lunch and we don't need you weighing us down." I gave him a disbelieving look.

"And what about you?" I asked quizzically. "What gives you the right to weigh us down?" I tried giving it back, but he wouldn't take it. I sighed and took the chopsticks carefully in my hand. Shooting him one last glance I took a bite of the rice. "Happy?"

"Hn." He turned to sit back down in his spot and I frowned.

"Hey Uchiha." He faced me again only to have me shove the rice in his mouth, forcing him to swallow.

"What the hell!?" He glared.

"There, now be good and eat the rest of your lunch. Oh wait," I took one last bite. "Damn that's good. Here ya go." I smiled cheekily whirling on the spot and plopping myself against a post.

"You completely missed the point." He growled walking next to me. I continued to smile.

"Actually sometimes I think I may be the only one to catch the point. Everyone else has to have it repeatedly stabbed into them till it practically draws blood." He looked at me as though I were insane. "I unlike you, actually ate breakfast, I unlike you, do not need to be eating lunch." A broad faced lie! I didn't have jack for breakfast. But he didn't need to know that.

"You unlike me are bleeding everywhere." He deflected. I frowned.

"Awe you do care, but food is not going to make it better, and I've already stopped bleeding." I said, taking the chopsticks away and picking up the rice. "Open wide." He didn't open. "Uchiha." I growled. Still nothing. I poked him sharply in the side and he gasped. Taking my chance I shoved more rice in, to prevent from choking he had to swallow. "This would be easier if you cooperated. Honestly, feeding you is like trying to get Tanner to go home. This by the way, harder then it sounds."

"Who's Tanner?" he asked a moment later.

"A boy, why jealous?" I teased. He looked at me skeptically, a look that read, 'you're an idiot.' "Awe, you know you want me." I joked walking my fingers up his shoulder.

"This time only, ya got that Naruto." Sakura said, Naruto blushed. The two things he loved most, Sakura and Raman, it was dream come true. No sooner had Naruto swallowed a poof sounded. And when the smoke cleared what stood in its place could start nightmares. I am ashamed to say that my first instinct was to hide behind the nearest opaque object around, but considering that was Sasuke, I managed to stop myself.

"You four. You broke the rules, and now for your punishment!" Clouds came from absolutely nowhere and lightning struck over our sensei's head. "Any last words!?" He asked darkly.

"But, but you said…" Naruto stuttered.

"Yes," Kakashi urged.

"You said there were four of us! That's what you said and that's why Sakura and . . ." Naruto stumbled over his words.

"We are all on this squad and we're all in it together." Sasuke said in Naruto's place. I smiled, subconsciously taking a bit of Sasuke's lunch.

"Yeah, that's right! We gave our lunch to him because the four of us are one!" Sakura added' bravely.' If I could bring myself to put her and the word 'brave' in the same sentence.

"The four of you are one?! That's your excuse?" They nodded and quite suddenly the entire scene changed. The sky was bright, the clouds where gone and Kakashi was smiling happily. "Then… you pass!" he laughed.

"What do you mean? How'd we pass?" Sakura asked. Tch, if I where her I wouldn't have questioned it.

/Thank GOD I'm not her!/

"You are the first squad that ever succeeded. The others did exactly what I said and fell into every trap. They couldn't think for themselves. A ninja must see through deception." He explained to his clearly dumbfounded students. I however, had only just realized that I had eaten Sasuke's entire lunch and was looking around in slight panic. "In the ninja world, those who break the rules are scum, that's true. But those who abandon their friends are worse than scum."

"Wow." Naruto breathed. "You know what? He's uh… kinda cool." I nodded slightly.

"The exercise is over. Squad seven starts its first mission tomorrow. Let's go home." The Jounin announced.

"I did it! I did it! Believe it! I'm a ninja, ninja, ninja. . . I knew they'd do this! It happens every time! You guys forgot to untie me!" Naruto yelled as everyone else retreated. I took a kunai and threw it squarely cutting his ropes. "Thanks a lot Angel-chan!" He huffed catching up.

"Yeppers." I answered depositing the empty container into a trash bin as we walked by.

"Yay, I was so hungry from not eating breakfast but I'm full now!" I laughed and Sasuke sweat dropped. Oh so the infamous Uchiha Sasuke is above twitching but not sweat dropping. Tch, nice.

--------------------------------------------- **Later that day **-------------------------------------------

I flicked a wet strand of hair behind my ear jumping buildings as fast as my battered legs would let me. I had bathed in the stream and rebandaged my wounds after the survival exercise. Of course I had to loose Naruto first lest risk him finding out I had no where to live. Now that wasn't exactly the truth, my home was now the Sakura tree, and it felt like it too. I left my leather jacket behind, normally something I'd never be caught without but, and it's sad I know, it was just too heavy on the injuries.

Hopefully my hair would dry by the time my run had finished. It was also refreshing. Let's face it, Japan ain't actually clear air central. It's not like its polluted or anything but compared to this, it may as well be. Completely untainted: absolutely no cars, no factories, and trees up to wazoo. My MP3 was playing Three Days Grace into only one ear as I kept the other open as a just in case. If there was one thing I hated, couldn't stand, it was silence. There was just this one strand. "Damn." I muttered flicking it out of my face once again.

Despite discarding my jacket and hiding it to perfection I had not discarded the katana I had purchased earlier that morning. No, I couldn't wield it, I knew that. I'd have to practice first, but until I had mastered it, named it, it would stay with me. It's just how I worked, the same thing happened all those years ago, with 'winters frost.' Though it still never left my side. Besides I had already grown accustomed to the extra weight hanging from my belt.

My ears pricked at the distinct sound of metal meeting wood. The sun was no longer at its highest sure, maybe 6:00 pm, but still it was hot out. Who would be practicing right now??? Subconsciously I had changed my path and was now heading towards the sound. When I discovered my detour I didn't bother to change it; I was curious, no harm in that.

I stopped only now blinking in surprise at the Hyuga clan symbol. The compound. The noises had led me to the compound? I shrugged, that didn't matter. Peering around, I only just barely made out the figure of a person. Male or female, I was too far to tell. So what to do, get closer of course. It didn't occur to me that I may not know this person and they could already see me coming, it didn't occur to me that they may have the byakugan nor would I have cared if it did.

I crouched low in the tree before the figure. Yes this person did have the Hyuga bloodline trait, however they weren't using it in this simple kunai exercise. This was unfortunate, Hyuga should always train with someone else, to learn chakra points and blocks. Yet here she was, Hyuga Hinata, all by herself. I shook my head, something about that didn't seem right.

'Well, to day's a fun day for experiments, might as well.' If I did this wrong I'd probably get a kunai in the head; that would be unfortunate. I focused a small amount of chakra and flipped on the tree branch so I was upside down. I caught the kunai just in time, next to my left ear. See there had never been any real danger, it would have flown right by, but still, too close for comfort.

She gasped and blinked in surprise. "Y-Yukari?? W-what are you d-doing h-here?" She stuttered. The chakra was holding me in place so I grinned.

"Just passing by." I shrugged. "But then I saw you training all by your lonesome and decided to drop in." I flipped back up before turning and flipping to land right in front of her. I LOVE THIS BODY! I just flipped off a tree branch!!! "Am I interrupting?" I replied casually. She shook her head hastily and I sighed. "Hinata-chan, do not be afraid to tell me if I am, I won't take it personally and I got to chew out the Uchiha prick today so I'm in a relatively good mood."

"N-no, you a-are fine." I nodded.

"You should be training with someone." I stated. "The Huyga have many talents, but most need to be practiced with an opponent. And well…" I looked back at the target on the tree. "your aim couldn't be sharper." I laughed a little, at my own joke.

"Oh, I-I just… don't k-know who t-to a-ask." She murmured shyly fidgeting her fingers habitually.

"Well would you mind too terribly if I joined you?" I asked still playing with her kunai. Her eyes widened.

"Y-you don't h-have to do t-that! I d-don't want t-to be a b-burden t-to anyone." She whispered. I smiled turning the kunai so it rested point up on my finger.

"Tch, you could never be a burden Hinata-chan!" I exclaimed brightly. She didn't seem convinced. "Now, look, my pride won't let me ask for help but as I said before it's been fed today courtesy of Popsicle, sooooo how about a; if I help you, you help me sorta thing!?"

"But h-how could I-I ever help y-you Yukari-ch-chan." Her brows furrowed. The girl needs a higher self esteem, maybe not as high as mine since I'm totally narcissistic, but a little higher wouldn't hurt.

"Well you see," I laughed a bit overly nervous, but it fit the act. "The Hyuga are famous for their excellent chakra control and well I've been having this problem with walking up trees. I just can't seem to expel the right amount, it's always too much." I explained. She blinked at me in clear confusion.

"B-But you were j-just," I grinned widely.

"No I wasn't. I was hanging by one foot. It's easier for someone like me to simply tuck the other foot away so I don't have to worry about the exact same chakra release rate, though it is higher then it would be were it both feet. But walking up trees and hanging upside down is something a wee bit more difficult." I explained. "So what do ya say Hinata-chan? Deal?" She reached out tentatively and shook my hand in confirmation. "Great!" I said brightly.

I handed her back her Kunai, backed away and took a defensive position. "Alright Hinata-chan, hit me."

"B-but Yukari-san!"

"No need to be so formal Hinata-chan. Unless my calling you -chan bugs you?" I frowned.

"Uh, n-no it's f-fine." She twiddled her fingers again. In all this time, not once had she made eye contact with me. How is that even possible??? Did she even know my eyes were red?

"Alright then there shouldn't be a problem. I want you to successfully seal off the chakra points in my left arm." I stated readying myself.

"Yukari-chan I-I could n-never!" She gasped bringing her hands up to cover her mouth.

"Hinata-chan, it's just my arm."

"B-but I don't w-want t-to hurt y-you." She shook madly as though the very idea was horrifying. I frowned. 'It's just my arm… for now.' I thought. This would also help me experiment with something. If chakra didn't exist in my world did that mean I could go on without it and not feel so weak. I had a theory that even if she sealed off my chakra reserves that since my body was already adapt to being devoid of the force itself that I would be able to handle it, a bit more naturally then anyone else. That is not to say of course it wouldn't hurt like hell, I'm also willing to bet that a vital organ strike would be just as hazardous. Plus I get to help Hinata!

"Hinata-chan, this is for your practice, I'll be fine. Besides, you're SUPOSSED to get hurt during practice." I assured. She nodded timidly putting on a determined face.

"Byakugan." She whispered activating her bloodline limit. She charged, it was a normal run, no extra chakra and I could easily follow her movements. When she was a foot away I braced myself, and when she was barely and inch away… she stopped.

"I c-can't do i-it, I d-don't want t-to hurt y-you Yukari."

I anime fell. SO close. How anticlimactic. I got up rubbing the back of my head and laughed despite my confusion. This was gonna be difficult.

------------------------------------------------------ -----------------------------------------------------

Time found Hinata and me practicing everyday though we still found time for our teams and I still practiced on my own. Only the other night I had tried the fire flower jutsu.

**Flash Back**

_The grass was cool, the night was quiet and I was… extremely bored. My right hand lay atop the water of the stream in a lazy fashion and the sent of sakura petals become overwhelming. Small dots of eerily green dipped in neat patters around me. As beautiful as this all was, sleep would not come and my awe was soon replaced by a growing irritation. _

_/I'm singing in the rain, just singing in the rain!/_

"_What a glorious feeling I'm happy again."_

_/I'm laughing at clouds!/_

"_So dark up above."_

_/The suns in my heart,/_

_Together/"And I'm ready for love."/_

_It was strange to be sitting here and singing aloud with the voice in my head, even if it was only inner me. I had refused to merge with the ditz because I knew this would happen. And yet slowly I think she may have been leaking into me. _

"_There's gotta be better ways to handle boredom." I sighed closing my eyes. I was suddenly struck with a thought and they flew open again. I sat up with rejuvenated energy and stood while still facing the stream. "Here we go." I went through the hand signs with relative ease and focused the burning in the pit of my stomach to my throat. _

'_Here goes nothing!' I let loose the breath and smoke came pouring out of my mouth. I started a coughing fit and I choked on my own breath. Frantically I waved the smoke away from my face and registered as stinging sensation as the cloud got in my eyes. 'And to think that's what would have happened if I had tried it on Kakashi, talk about embarrassing.'_

_/Ya, you sure got lucky./_

**End of Flashback**

Hinata had been reluctant in training at first but I had pushed her to find my theory correct and after convincing her we shared a fair spar. I helped her with her bloodline limit and her offensive speed. In turn Hinata taught me chakra control. Thank god I didn't wait for the trip to the Waves. It would have been far too embarrassing. But of course there is an advantage to knowing what's going to happen before it does.

She became more comfortable around me, well at least enough to laugh a little bit every time I fell on my ass and let loose a list of swearwords that'd make any sailor proud.

I sighed in mild contempt. "Alright Hina-chan, your move." She stared at me from the other side of the field her kekigenki activated and her position that of the gentle fist. Her breath was surprisingly not as labored as it once would have been and she was ready to keep going even though we'd been doing nothing but training for the past hour. A tell in her arm alerted me and I braced as she charged. Her movements were slower then when we had started but then so were mine.

Her palms flew at me and I dodged skillfully, becoming aware of how close her hand was to my face just there. I wrapped my hands around her arms and flipped her, before she could land on her feet I appeared behind her and screwed up any hopes of a landing. She gasped hitting the ground and my face contorted in worry.

"Hinata-chan, oh god, are you okay?!" She sweat dropped as I flew into random hysterics over her wellbeing. "I'm serious, are feeling okay, did I break anything, god tell me I didn't break anything! Your father'll kill me for sure!"

**FLASHBACK**

"_Perfect Hinata!"I exclaimed slinging an arm around her exhausted shoulders. "You hit the chakra points just right, in fact I can't feel my arm at all!" _

"_Oh, I-I'm s-sorry Yukari-ch-chan!" She said hastily but I waved it off with my still mobile arm._

"_Not at all, not at all. You did exactly what I wanted you to do, and you did it well! But if it's not too much trouble…" I trailed extending the limp limb towards her. _

"_O-of course!" She hastily hit the points again and I gave a wide smile while rubbing the feeling back into my arm. _

"_Thanks." I sighed gratefully._

"_Hinata." The voice was smooth, masculine and male, demanding my attention and milking it for what it was worth. It had come from a man, tall with pale lavender eyes harder then Hinata's and long hair. _

"_F-father!" Hinata said drastically going into a bow._

"_Hinata, what are you doing." Hiashi used as few words as possible so it seemed and Hinata fidgeted under his icy stare. _

"_I-I am t-training father." She explained quietly and Hiashi looked at me, sizing me up for what I was worth. _

"_And who is this?" He asked in a low tone and I frowned at his disapproving stare._

"_Ah, this i-is Yukari. S-she is one of t-the people I-I train w-with." I stepped forward taking her fathers eyes off her again and bent into a graceful bow with my hand at the hilt of my katana in a display that of respect though the stance was odd for a ninja it held the same principles. _

"_It is nice to meet you Hyuga-sama." I couldn't bring myself to say it was an honor to meet him; honor was a sign of respect I don't think I've ever shown before. But the words came thankfully smooth and this time I could not read his face. _

"_So, you train with my daughter." It wasn't a question but I answered all the same._

"_Hai, Hyuga-sama."_

"_And have helped my daughter at all?" He asked. A pang of resentment tugged at me though I kept a smooth face remembering he wasn't __all__ bad. _

"_I believe that the improvements are indeed great on __both__ parts." I held his intimidating gaze keeping my own strong and I could almost feel Hinata shaking beside me._

"_Fine then,__" He said at last. "Continue on." He departed. When I was sure he was out of earshot I relaxed though rubbed my shoulders at the sudden cold._

"_Damn, what a scary mother fucker… Is it colder out here!?"_

**END OF FLASHBACK**

"Yukari, w-wasn't it you who said, that we are supposed to get hurt in training?" She said quietly and with barely the stutter she had used upon our first meeting. I blinked and sheepishly rubbed the back of my head. "Heh, heh. Sorry." I extended a hand which she gratefully took.

"I think we've earned a break." I chuckled. I had become attached to little Hinata-chan no matter how much I blamed it on the fact that her father would kill me if I didn't take care of her. That was just a convenient excuse. "Here." I tossed the water bottle to her and she took a sip before offering it back. I shook my head. "Drink more, I will not risk your dehydration." She hesitated and I frowned while trying to use a towel to wipe off sweat and dirt. "Water is plentiful, we can always get more."

"Actually, there i-is no more left Yukari-chan"

I laughed at the irony. "Then we'll have to get more won't we Hinata?" Her brow furrowed. She could just walk the short way into the compound and get some but it was rude to simply leave Yukari. Strangely enough, thinking back on their first and only encounter, her father seemed to have liked Yukari.

"Alright, then, let's go get some more." Hinata gave me a light smile making up her mind to bring me along and it felt good to not hear a stutter. I follower her back to the manner and she led me at a casual pace through a sliding door. In all honesty this was the first time I had been inside the residence even though I had been training with Hinata and I took my shoes off in the front as a sign of respect. I looked around curiously, though made sure to stay with Hinata, it would really suck to get lost in this place which was easily more then possible. It was rather blank, with wooden floors and creamy walls and we passed multiple doors on our way to god only knows where.

"We're almost there Yukari-chan." She said softly.

"Hinata." The girl was dead silent as she was addressed by a voice from the door we had only just passed. She backtracked slowly and I frowned as she slid open the door. Hashi was there, drinking tea on a small matt his eyes fixated on something I could not see at this angle.

"Hanabi sit." he announced and I suddenly realized Hinata's sister must have been there as well.

"Yes father." Came the soft but even reply.

"Hinata bring your partner in here with you." She tensed so utterly that she was already shaking.

"H-Hai." I walked in behind her and Hinata shut the door after me. We both sat in front of her father with me in between the two Hyuga sisters. The younger snuck a glance at me and my pride wouldn't let me slouch nor show any sign of weakness. He offered tea which I politely took and sipped slightly.

"And how is training progressing?" I wasn't sure whom it was directed at but I was thankful when Hinata answered for me.

"T-It is g-going w-well f-father." She said simply.

"Yukari isn't it?" He asked and I nodded. "What is your clan name."

"Irenara Hyuga-sama, Irenara Yukari."

/Bond, James Bond/

'Now is defiantly not the time.'

"It sounds familiar." Was all he stated.

/Tch, ya right, you just wanna say that so you can sound smart!/

"Hmm, I don't know where you would have heard it before. Meaning no disrespect of course when I say; that we are close to extinction as it is."

"You speak so freely of secrets perhaps your clan doesn't wish for me hear." He said, or was it a question???

"Not at all, my position gives me the right to do so, and you are gravely mistaken if you think that what I have said is a secret." I answered easily.

"I see, and what direct family do you have?" He continued casually.

"None, Hyuga-sama." His brow furrowed.

"Oh?" He clearly wanted me to go on and I bit back a rude remark as I complied.

"Yes Hyuga-sama. Not massacred or anything, it was more eerily natural then that. My mother: an accident, my brother: a kidnap, my sister: a murder, and my father: … a fool." I finished unable to hide the inevitable coldness in my voice.

"Well you mustn't be very strong if you need help from my daughter." He said. Hinata tensed beside me, and I knew it wasn't for her sake. She knew me enough to know I would retaliate and she closed her eyes waiting for the reaction that didn't come. Instead I held my tongue with difficulty and made my smile bittersweet.

"Hyuga-sama, I acknowledge your position and authority, but I would dearly appreciate if you did not insult me." His gaze sharpened and met mine though I did my best to stay impassive and sipped the tea grateful for a distraction. "Perhaps I do need your daughters help, and perhaps I merely enjoy her company. Whether it is one or the other I'm afraid is _not _within your power to decide. Do not judge my abilities until you have seen me fight, and do not judge my mentality until you have known me long enough to actually have a conversation with me on matters of casualty." I ignored Hinata's heavy breathing at my side. "I can assure you that I am no weakling and as the _heir_ of my clan I am afraid I can not allow you to speak of me in such a manner Huyga-sama, you understand."

/The heir???/

'Well I am the last one.' I would not give him the privilege to retaliate and I quietly set my tea down and stood.

"Hey you can't,"

"Hanabi." Hiashi held his hand up to stop his daughter from continuing. She did so, though confused.

"Hinata, we'll continued our training tomorrow if you don't mind." I said and she shook herself out of the temporary stupor. Then I turned back to the clans head, bowed, and said in a less then soft voice, "Thank you for the tea, but I think if that is all, I shall take my leave." No one spoke and I calmly reached out for the door gently sliding it open. "Oh and Huyga-sama, these secrets of my clan that you say I speak so freely of… trust me when I tell you…" His gaze locked with mine. "if the Irenara clan has secrets to keep, you will not even know that they exist."

I had left them on that eerily note, proud of how I had come off in my impression. Halfway back to the Sakura tree I stopped walking. Things seemed to come together like a puzzle of a court jester in one of those mad looking hats. 'He was testing me.' I realized. 'The Hyuga Hiashi was testing me!' Yes it all made sense; the questions, that rather tactless comment on my strength, even the bloody tea. 'Why the hell would he test me like that???'

/Maybe he wants to approve of your training with his daughter/ That made sense.

'If that's the case how do you think I came off?'

/Like the powerful heir of a clan, who protects her secrets and isn't afraid to speak her mind, whether it be to a clan leader of to a common street child/ Inner me said with more then a hint of pride.

'Thanks. If that's the case, I hope he approves. Not that I need his approval or anything, but, I gotta say, it would be nice to have instead of having to train with Hinata under… less then comfortable conditions.'

…

/What's wrong now!?!?/

'nothing… it's just… I can't believe I didn't realize it sooner!!!'

**A/N: **Whew. That was long. I had originally planned to update this before Easter but well, my bunny doesn't come anymore so the sugar rush hasn't been an inspiration. Lol. Well anyway, **Next Time on Fuck I Think My TV's Broken, **filler me this, puppy here puppy there, opinions, kittens, sarcasm, code names, chess, Memorial stone, secrets, advice, and Tazuna the bridge Builder, All in Chapter 6, **Fillery Goodness With a Side of Progress!**

_Yukari __- "Sarcastic Bitch to Scarecrow, I've reached point D… Scarecrow? Sarcastic Bitch would like to know 'why we need a point D?' over." _

_Kakashi__ - "Scarecrow humbly requests that Sarcastic Bitch changes her highly inappropriate name." _

_Yukari__ - "Sarcastic Bitch refuses, over."_


	6. Suicide

Dear readers and anyone who gives a shit. I regret to announce that this is not another chapter, which quite unfortunately will screw up my chapterness. No I'm not experiencing a writer's block… well just the usual which I feel like I can handle. And no, I'm not quitting the story. If any of you have looked at my profile recently you'll know this already but I really need to write it again. And I know you don't care and I know when you opened this you were expecting a chapter six of this story, but I'm not asking you to care, nor to listen if you do not wish to do so. But I have friends who read this story and I know that you, at least, will give a shit.

The fact is, yesterday, Wednesday 23, a dear friend of mine committed suicide. He was a good person, hilarious actually. I last talked to him yesterday at school; he seemed fine, just happy. He wasn't acting out of the normal, I mean sure he was acting like an idiot but that's just who he is… was. He went completely hairspray happy with like two bottles. I laughed so hard. He loved that song, therapy, from Tick Tick BOOM, and I can't watch Moulin Rouge, without thinking, why didn't I notice? I'm around him all the time… so why the hell didn't I notice?!

I skipped most of school today. I skipped 3rd period, 5th period, 6th period, hell I'm skipping 7th period as we speak! I won't go to 8th, what would be the point. But this time I can't help but wonder… why? Heh, how corny does that sound? I feel like I'm writing another chapter in Yukari's life. But this, this is mine, how incredibly ironic. But I want to know, why someone so happy, someone so loved, would just… give up. And that's what he did, he gave up!

This actually reminds me of chapter 6. In fact it's almost disturbingly close. Ya'll haven't read it yet so I guess you couldn't sympathize, but when you do, you'll get it k? It's raining outside, everyone crying… we miss him…

I'm sorry readers for not updating chapter 6, but I promise I'm almost done and Ill get to it soon ok!

And I'm sorry to you,

James Sterling Philips,

I'm sorry I didn't notice,

I'm sorry you felt so alone,

And may you rest in peace.

Amen.


	7. Fillery Goodness with a Side of Progress

**A/N: **Dear readers… Thank you for your support. You don't know how grateful I am, especially after not even posting chapter six last time. I felt kinda guilty so I made this chapter really, really long! Any-la-who. This chapter focuses a lot on missions and character development. I can't very well just have them go off gallivanting to the waves when there's a month long time skip in between now can I? But anyway please enjoy!

**Disclaimer: **If I owned Naruto I don't think I would have misspelled Kakashi's last name do you? Ha-ha

**Chapter 6**

**Fillery Goodness with a Side of Progress!**

**(I'm so sorry… So sorry you had to die… So sorry I couldn't protect you… I'm so sorry for everything…)**

**------------Filler fun 1: Mission: Walk the Dogs (AKA: Make Sasuke Nervous)---------**

Hiashi did not stop my training with Hinata, for that I was thankful. In fact upon returning the next day fully ready for a confrontation I was instead met with… tea? Yes there had been tea on the porch where Hinata sat with a thoughtful look. She then informed my already confused self of something beyond odd.

"_You know what Yukari-chan? I think my father likes you."_

See? See?! Didn't I tell ya it was odd!?! In my bewilderment I chose to do that thing I so often do, I chose to ignore it. Besides… the tea was good. Hinata was getting stronger and I could walk up trees. But that wasn't the only thing I was practicing. I was focusing a lot on ninjutsu, tiring ninjutsu might I add. The lessons on chakra control where… really boring, but worth the results. Aside from practicing alone with my katana, which I really needed to name, I was also learning how to walk on water. Granted I don't think I've ever been so thoroughly soaked in my entire life.

I swear the missions were becoming increasingly dull; it got to the point where I only came to help poor Orange Man and to spite that arrogant prick.

"Okay kids, choose a dog."

"Alright! I'm gonna choose the biggest one!!" Naruto announced. I mentally smacked my forehead. Sakura chose a relatively small dog, not a pup or anything, just small. It fit her, kinda looked like something Barbie would own if you get. One of those white things.

Sasuke himself chose a small dog, it was dark though and suited his personality, and naturally he would choose one of the more solitary creatures. It too was like a mini image of my teammate.

And then there was Naruto… Naruto, well… how do I put this? Naruto chose this gigantic Rottweiler that wanted nothing more then to drag the person at the other end of its leash into the ground.

"AH!! Would you stop! Sit boy! Stop. Stay. Would you listen to me you damned dog." I shook my head slightly at Naruto's attempts. He was doing it all wrong. That creature was the size of a mini dinosaur. But he wasn't asking for my help yet so I would wait. Good excuse huh? I buried my face in the soft fur of my own dog. It was still a pup, a mini wolf if you will. And just sooo cute!

"Your dog is very cute Yukari-chan." Pinky commented. She had grown a tolerance for me even called me a friend. I never called her forehead, just pinky, but what had really done it was when the dumb chick finally figured out I wasn't after 'her' Sasuke. From that realization on, she considered me a friend. Whatever, I didn't particularly care.

"Isn't he!?" I cooed pulling my face away and smiling at the little animal. He looked at me with big blue eyes before putting a paw on my chest and jumping to lick my nose. I melted. "Yep you certainly are." I praised holding him tighter against me. He looked like a little wolf pup, cute!

Sakura blinked. It's not every day you see the nice side of Yukari Irenara. In fact this was probably the first time she had ever seen it.

"Wow, you really like dogs." I looked up thoughtfully at this statement.

"Ya, my little sister liked them a lot so I was around them all the time." I replied softly as I put the puppy on the ground and stood strait.

"And how's your dog? Its name is Night, right Sasuke-kun?" Pinky said brightly. Sasuke however was looking at me, the barest hint of… err something flashing in his eyes, before he answered her and turned away. I caught him doing that in increasing amounts as of late. Weird.

"Hn." What an answer.

"My dogs name is **Basium**; it's a Latin term that means kiss. Isn't that romantic Sasuke-kun!?" I twitched. Kakashi had given us permission to name the dogs since they belonged to the shelter originally. But honestly… agh, the dog liked it, yep, I wanna puke.

"NO! Don't go over there. Listen to me!! Awe shit." Poor Nauto-kun.

"Summers Storm, stay here." I sighed quietly, letting go of the leash.

"NOT THE RAMAN SHOP!!!!" Naruto begged through the dirt as he desperately tried to get the brute under control. I snatched the leash from his hold and forced chakra into my feet to hold me down. Grunting I wrapped the cord around my hand an extra time and held. I wouldn't let my arm move and the dog stopped. For the first time it seemed to care who was behind it. And suddenly it charged.

"Awe hell no!" I shouted but the dog was already on me. "EEP!" He bowled me over licking my face and wagging his tail happily. "EEEWWEEE!" Naruto was laughing extremely hard and I shot him a glare before being drowned in saliva once more. "Awe, come on!" I tried in vein to push the dog off, this was just ridiculous! I barely managed to slip out. "See that? That is what happens when I try to be nice." I growled using a towel that had appeared out of absolutely nowhere to get the dogs drool off. I darted behind Sasuke peering in fear over his shoulder.

"What do you think you're doing?" He asked though his voice remained as ever monotonous.

"Shh," I breathed quietly in his ear. "I don't think he sees me yet."

"Oh ya, genius, what about his nose?" Sasuke said, though at lease he too was whispering, oh and see, his breathing was shallower too, he didn't wanna be attacked by that THING! However I took that offensively and let loose a small growl to show my disapproval. Was he saying I smell!? The dog seemed to search with its eyes for a moment and I pressed myself against Uchiha's back as his eyes scanned across us.

Sasuke's breath hitched as did mine but I was the only one to relax after the dogs eye passd harmlessly over us. Unfortunately, right afterwards I let out a sigh of relief and to my absolute horror, having spotted me, the dog went for me again.

This time however he found something small standing in his way and it wasn't the Ice Cube; my miniature wolf like husky, my Summers Storm.

The Rottweiler, Brutus, whom I had helpfully assisted Naruto in naming, seemed to actually scoff at the pup. I found myself growling in sync with Summers Storm not caring that this was particularly weird for the boy blocking me.

'How dare you!? How dare you insult Storm!? One day Storm'll be not only big, but agile and quick the way that bulky body could never be, so don't go looking down on him!'

/Damn strait!/

In a flash of unexplainable fury I was before the great brut, glaring fixedly. "Don't you dare insult Summers Storm! You insult him, you insult me, and insulting me will not bode well on your part." I hissed one hand on my hip the other poking Brutus's nose repeatedly. Storm barked approvingly behind me,

Brutus stared dumbly, no seriously, he didn't have a clue what I was saying. And then… he licked my face. It was at this moment, where I was positively fuming, that Orange Man pickup the leash once again. The Rottweiler, practically sensing the extra weight at the end of the line instantly dragged a screaming Naruto off to parts unknown. I did not try to help again.

"What the hell are you looking at!?" I shot at Sasuke who shrugged innocently. Where the hell was that damned towel?!

---------------**Filler Fun 2: Chess Against a Genius (It's not gonna be pretty)**-------------

It doesn't take a genius to beat Irenara Yukari at Shoji, or Go for that matter. Or at least Shikamaru made me seem that way. I was actually relatively good at chess and yet here we were, and I, Irenara Yukari, was losing. I must have looked pretty pathetic. It had started with him moving his pawn, a common move and I then used my signature move, ya I've got a signature first move. My knight was always first into play and it was free game from there after.

"You're actually not doing that bad a job at protecting those knights of yours." He commented as though to seem thoughtful though there wasn't much behind it besides laziness.

"Ya well, I like my knights." I said absently and frowned as he took my bishop.

I wisely didn't take his rook despite temptation, somehow my knight getting knocked off by a pawn seemed rather unacceptable. He truly did always seem to be a step ahead, unless it came to the knights. I took his pawn he took my queen, I took his rook, he took mine, I took his knight and I was in check, I moved out of it, and I was in check again. I finally killed off his queen with my knight and I was in checkmate… by a pawn. He unceremoniously tipped my king with his finger and in the silence it rolled off the board. A third of his pieces still stood, and all I had were my knights, both of them.

"Game over." I sighed.

"You'd have done better if you'd lost a knight or two." He yawned leaning back against a wall.

"Sa, what can I say, I play favorites." He gave me a skeptic look. "Only in chess." I defended lightly.

"What's so great about knights? If anything you sacrificed you're queen and king to save them."

"Well the king's clearly and ass who makes his wife do all the work while he moves one step at a time and the queen seems like a self sacrificing character, I mean she's always doing so much damage, so I figure 'why go against her nature'" His eyebrow shot up at my explanation but I wasn't done yet. "A knight is loyal piece, sworn to serve its king for the remainder of his rule. They hardly have more power then a pawn but when they use it it's always against their main objective. They can skip over the little things like no other piece can." I said fingering one of my knights in a thoughtful way and watching as the light bounced off the black piece. "They are like that assassin nin that saves everyone by only taking out the important pieces. My pawns are genin and chunin, my Rooks the jonin and my bishops the ANBU."

"But you still lost." He pointed out carelessly.

"The battle perhaps Pineapple Head, but your victory is a pyrrhic one at best. For what is a lazy ass king without its queen to protect it? You won the moment you took my queen and I bought you down with me the moment my knight assassinated yours."

"Not that you make sense or anything but shouldn't you be a favorite of the queen then?" He inquired and I shrugged a smile tugging at my lips.

"I favor the assassin over the queen not because of true importance in comparison but because that they are the most independent piece of them all and would probably live the longest in reality were this war to end in the loss of their king. Remember Maru-kun, you may be one step a head of me but I," I moved my knight one last time and successfully knocked over his king in a little too late checkmate, "am only one step behind."

----------**Filler Fun 3: Insight into Characters (apparently we're all useless)**-------------

I was sleeping on the railing of the bridge by the time my teammates had arrived. It seemed to be routine over anything else. I would be first, arriving at dawn, Sasuke would follow, then Sakura shortly after, and I would already be asleep in my chosen spot before Naruto even got there. And together we would wait, sometimes in silence, sometimes in screams yet never in causal conversation, for our always late sensei and his dumbass excuses.

At times when I couldn't sleep I'd still pretend, for otherwise it would be truly awkward. What do you talk about in circles such as ours where I wasn't even supposed to exist? So Naruto would shout and brag to Sasuke who would eventually win their verbal argument in a rather cool headed state and then Sakura, who had been yelling at Naruto only moments before, would properly bash him in the head before praising Sasuke. To say I felt out of place wouldn't be a total lie, to say it bothered me wouldn't either. But I would sleep for my sake as well as theirs.

**Orange Man prov.**

'Stupid teme, always trying to make me look bad in front of Sakura and Angel!' I thought. Well that wasn't necessarily true, Angel always seemed to be sleeping right about now. I looked over and sure enough the girl lay there on the rail, with apparent ease and unawareness to the water rushing beneath her; arms rose to support the back of her head and porcelain skin shimmering in the light. 'What did she do all night?' I wondered mildly. 'Come to think of it, I never caught where she lived. We could be neighbors for all I know!'

And then there was Sasuke, 'stupid teme,' as I had named him so cleverly in my opinion. 'I'd do anything for that kind of attention from Sakura.' I thought rather sulkily as I watched Sakura dote over the moody jerk.

'I need someone to talk to, this silence is killing me!!! But…' my face almost instantly fell. 'Sakura-chan will hit me if I interrupt again. Why does she always have to be on his side? But maybe Angel-chan…'

**Pinky's Prov.**

**Inner Sakura: **Cha! Naruto you idiot! It's your fault Sasuke-kun is in such a bad mood!

That was right, in my opinion if the blond hadn't been there Sasuke and I would already be going out. My eyes got all shimmery preventing me from seeing Sasuke's grimace.

"_Sakura-__chan__."_

"_Yes Sasuke-kun?"_

"_I love you." Sasuke confessed embracing me tight._

"_I love you too Sasuke-kun!" And then he kissed me passionately!_

**Inner Sakura: **(sigh) that would be perfect!

Outside In the real world Sasuke's grimace deepened.

**Popsicles Prov. **

I've come to the conclusion that my team is a bunch of idiots. Just looking at Sakura I could see her emerald eyes glazed over as she dreamt about I don't know what. I don't want to either. Kakashi, I didn't particularly see anything special about him. He's a lazy ass that reads porn. And he's supposed to be teaching us? Naruto, well he's Naruto, need I say more. Yes? Well then. He's a dobe, a complete failer, dead last, and he wants to be Hokage? The day Naruto becomes Hokage I'll go missing nin for sure. Even more annoyingly… and even though I'd probably deny this to my grave he was getting stronger, progressing faster then he should be.

My eyes darted to my last piece of dead weight. It came in the form of a slender girl, with pale skin and delicate features. Except the eyes, there was hardly anything delicate about those crimson eyes. How could she just lye there, every morning completely venerable?

She's a paradox, a walking contradiction… though she's strong. Just because I won't say it aloud doesn't mean I didn't recognize power when I saw it. Yes power, that was the word, and this girl, she had it. But she wasn't letting up any secrets about herself. She once said she had a little sister. Though she had said it in past tense, which makes me wonder. I don't think anyone knows where she lives, or where she came form. And she's almost childish, no that's not the word. But whatever the word I can't quite place.

She stopped a rampaging dog with chakra, I could sense it. And she had… muscle, pretty well developed. I felt my throat go dry as I remembered. It had been a strange sensation having the girl pressed up against my back, I hadn't really let my fan girls get close enough, and even then I sure they'd prefer the front. But it had made me realize she was mostly muscle and I wouldn't particularly want to be on the receiving end of her fist.

Yes the enigma that was Yukari Irenara only furthered my distrust. 'You have his eyes Irenara, I don't care how innocent you act, how kind you can be when you want to, you are hiding secrets… and you have his eyes…."

**Back with me (DREAM)**

_I knew I was asleep, for how else would it be snowing. The forest still looked more dead then alive and the snow remained untouched even when I walked through it. It had been happening more often, though that is a term for every now and then, this place that I would come to; this place within my dreams. It was here that I would see her again and perhaps it is all that kept me sane. _

"_Yuka!" She would shout and throw her overly padded arms around me. "You're back!" She would say and I would let her, for I missed her as well. And we would talk like old times that seemed far farther then they were, about pointless things and puns. And time works differently as well for us, as it was dark upon my arrival._

"_I was trying to hook you two up." I said honestly and her eyes grew wide._

"_WHY!? He was always flirting with you! He'd never go for me!" _

"_I guess that's true." _

"_HEY!" She pouted but knew I ment no harm._

"_Besides I was just his teacher, and he was just a perv." I said unceremoniously popping a well burned marshmallow into my mouth. We had settled on two well placed longs and I started a fire as Kanoke simply never could and she supplied the marshmallows which I didn't ask about. _

"_Not like you didn't flirt back." She scoffed._

"_I don't know what you're talking about." I replied innocently, and changed the subject skillfully. "I adopted a dog by the way. A husky pup, named him and everything."_

"_Oh??? You always did like animals more than humans… What's his name?" _

"_Summers Storm."_

"_Mmm… Pretty…" _

"_Heh, yeah." The silence that followed was very comfortable and in my opinion too soon broken._

"_Hey Yuka?"_

"_hmm??" I asked thought marshmallow gooiness._

"_How long do you think we've been here?" I froze momentarily before continuing to stab my next treat. These were grounds of which we hadn't treaded since our first meeting._

"_Not to say for sure. I figure we're already in July here, but back home… I just dunno."_

"_Do you think he misses us?" I knew who she was talking about._

"_I'm sure he does. Tanner was always rather fond of hanging out with us." I said softly. Kanoke's pink eyes stared off into nothing in particular. _

"_I see you, every now and then you know." She started. I gazed up strangely and she grinned._

"_The night before your first visit when you got all dizzy and almost fainted; that was funny." My brow furrowed. "and then I sorta saw you during the bell test and with Hinata's father. Your face got all red and angry when he called you weak, I thought you were gonna explode." She laughed. "It's so weird to see these flashes of you, I feel like I'm a stalker." She admitted and at that I really did laugh._

"_You feel like you're a stalker? I know every little detail about these people including what their future is. If anyone should feel that way then it should be me."_

"_Ya that must be weird."_

"_Weird." I admitted._

"_Really weird."_

"_Fuck'en weird."_

…

"Hahahahaha_!" The mirth was there again. _

"_I sang with you." She said through a chuckle. _

"_What?" _

"_Singing in the rain… I sang with you."_

_I smiled a small real smile. "yeah…" The song held no significance, no past importance that I'm going to have to explain, but we had always loved singing and were both rather good at it. _

"_Kanoke," I whispered. "I'm sorry." Her eyes widened considerably. When I apologize I say 'my apologies,' only when I truly mean it, do I say, 'I'm sorry.' But she couldn't seem to find the voice to speak, though I knew she wished to know why, so I would tell her. _"_You're here because of me. You where trying to save me, when you came."_

"_That's not true, I was talking to your T.V. and if that doesn't just scream my fault I don't know what does."_

"_No." I stated firmly. "You're not even really with me. I'm happy because you're safe here in this place. I don't know how I know you are safe, but I do. And I'm sad because you are alone. You of all people do not deserve to be alone."_

"_Girl what you talking about, you're here aren't you?" It was a rhetorical question said solely to make me feel better. _

"_I'm so sorry Kanoke. This whole time," I didn't finish as she wrapped her arms around me._

"_Don't Yuka, it's not your fault! You've done so much for us already, so please… don't apologize! It's not your fault!!!" She sobbed and I grew panicked as her tears sprung forth._

"_Awe shit, Kanoke, I didn't mean, I just, damn it don't cry! I don't know how to deal with crying people!" I pulled her into the embrace. I had never been a hugger I guess that's why she calmed down so fast. But perhaps in this world, where I knew time to be only irrelevant, it wasn't fast at all. "Oh, damn, I'm just bad at this comforting stuff aren't I?" _

_She looked up and me and smiled heartwarmingly._ "_Looks like it." Our eyes connected and I smiled softly before a distinct crackling could be heard. We looked around to the fire and I frowned at the marshmallow burning away._

"_What a waste." I sighed. _

**End of Dream**

My fist shot out before the opposing hand had even reached me and met with the solid form of Naruto's face. He was hurled backwards and sent over the bridges edge.

"Damn it Tanner I said no!" I raged habitually. No one else had ever been stupid enough to try and wake me otherwise. Yet as my vision cleared there was no boy smirking back at me having dodged my fist or cursing obsanities for having gotten a jab to the head. In fact there was no one that resembled that cocky bastard at all. I quickly shook off my shock at how natural the ritual had become for me and hopped up placing my hands on my hips.

"Damn Orange Man, if ya wanted me to sock ya in the face all ya had to do was ask."

He stumbled slightly in the water in an attempt at standing while using both hands to clutch at his rapidly bleeding nose. "wha are uo alking abou? I us tried do wake uo up und uo it me fo no reason a all!" (What are you talking about? I just tried to wake you up and you hit me for no reason at all!)

"Oh dear, did I really?" I tapped my chin in fake thought. I'd have continued the act as well had I not noticed something as Naruto clambered back onto the bridge. "Awe fuck." I vaguely noticed Pinky wince at my language choice. I lifted him from his hunched posture though gently and mindful of his nose. "Alright let's see it." I grabbed his wrists and pulled them away from his nose. Naruto had thankfully stopped moving, actually I wasn't even all that sure he was breathing. "Oh man I really did a number on you didn't I?" I commented my own face an inch from his and bringing up careful fingers to trace his bloodied nose lightly as a blush lit up his features.

"You should have been able to dodge that blow, dobe." Ya guess who, Popsicle decided to put in his penny's worth. Glancing over I noticed his face looked more irritable then usual. What's his problem???

"M' fine." Naruto managed to breathe out --to my surprise completely ignoring Sasuke's comment-- and I raised a skeptical brow.

"Uh-huh." I clicked my tongue thoughtfully then used the fingertip still on his face to push slightly on his nose. He let a quick and muffled cry as his eyes watered. "Come on Kit, let's get you to the hospital." I sighed taking his hand in mine and leading him away.

And that my dears, is how I, Irenara Yukari,

…

broke Uzumaki Naruto's nose.

------------**Filler Fun 4**: **Name (Happy Birthday… Maya)----------**

Training had already ended today. We only had the single mission of helping a man in his farming and it had ended almost painfully quickly. In return Kakashi let us train separately. Dinner time found me walking out of the Yamanaka Flower Shop, a small white rose adorned in my left hand. I had already set my mind to what I was going to do and I walked with my head down as I passed the gradually thinning crowds.

My hand refused to leave the hilt of 'Winters Frost' and Summers Storm, as though sensing the change in my demeanor remained carefully at my side.

I was quiet, very quiet and though there were thoughts racing to be remembered not a single one found coherency in my head. It was oddly chilly for this time of year and the sky held tell tale signs of coming rain. It's so weird, in all the years I came to acknowledge this day, not once had the sun been absent to share it with me. Not once had it rained.

The strange state of mind I had found myself in fled as my eyes took in the clearing. It was mercifully empty and I gripped my dagger tighter upon reaching its center piece.

'So these are all the names of those killed in the line of duty…' I dropped my cold façade, replacing it with a small blissful smile as I laid down the flower. 'Surely this is where you belong.' I took 'Winters Frost' into carefully graceful hands and began to carve.

'You always had faith in me; had me pegged as a hero… But I suppose I never let you see that other side of me did I? I never showed you the face of my mask.' I thought laughing quietly in the silence of the clearing. 'What would you have thought of me if you'd seen behind the lies? Seen the hideous face of one so undeniably damned? Tanner, Kanoke, and you were my family. But you were the closest to me, my own blood. The one I do anything for. You could have told me you hated me and I can almost assure you I'd say, "I'm sorry."' My laughter only grew there out, touched with insanity and hysteria, as I finished carving the name, just one name.

_**Irenara Maya.**_

The letters were uncanny to those of the other names and I had chosen a small spot. Maya never did like attention, except from me. She liked my attention. "Happy Birthday Maya. I-I brought something. It's small, but I actually paid honest for it. That would make you happy to know." I whispered my voice cracking slightly with effort and I pulled from my pocket a small black box. "It's not wrapped." I told. I never wrapped anything after our little experience. I had tried to wrap something once before and… well… all you need to know is that there was a lot of tape involved. I opened it and withdrew a small silver chain at the end of which dangled a oval bloodstone glinting eerily though no light was shown. "I had to spend all my mission savings but… look," I smiled though weakly and unclipped the small binding causing the silver encrusted jem to open sideways. "It opens. It's a locket. I had it specially made. I don't have the pictures yet but…" I stared tenderly down at the heart shaped place for a picture. There was engraved a verse I found fitting.

'_Maya, _

_my beloved sister, _

_my precious person, _

_my reason.'_

I took the locket and shutting it tightly I twisted in my spot so that I might look at the katana I still held at my belt. I eagerly slipped the object into the spot where a gem should have been, like the sapphire on my 'winters frost.'

"Vwalla!" I announced. "There now I have 'Winters Frost' and 'Ashen Flame.' One for both of you…"

Strom pressed his cool nose to the side of my arm in a questioning manner and I smiled softly at the creature. "Maya, this is Summers Storm." I said absently scratching behind his ears. Storm tilted his head farther into my fingertips till he just knocked himself over in effort. "He's a funny little creature, this one. I couldn't leave him at the shelter."

I picked up the rose again and found myself staring at it, blissfully unaware of the rolling thunder in the background. "I was so selfish, so stupid. I'm so sorry… So sorry you had to die… So sorry I couldn't protect you… I'm so sorry for everything… can you forgive me… my sweet Maya. Can you forgive you stupid sister? Your stupid selfish sister?"

Yes, she belonged here; a place for heroes, and brave souls. The hand containing the small rose graced her name as I leaned in against the memorial in a comfortable position. "Forgive me… Maya."

---------------------------**Filler Fun Uhh… 4 part 2??? Scarecrows Prov.** -------------------

A well used routine brought me back to the clearing. One that was put into pace every day I remained in this village. I was famous for it; the lateness I mean, and each damn excuse I would swear I've heard him use at lease once. Uchiha Obito. He had never really cared for timeliness and it seemed that after his passing the habit had become my own. I who was once one so quick, so timely, and so incredibly arrogant. So every morning I could manage it even if it was raining like today-- lateness be damned--I'd still visit.

It was rare to find someone else at the memorial, certainly never at the crack of dawn. But as my feet carried me over to it I was not unaware of another presence. Coming up from behind the stone, that was where I saw her. Irenara Yukari, my own student, and the pup she had adopted. It came as a shock to us all when she got him. She simply didn't seem like the type. She was strong, but silent on matters concerning herself, if not, anti-social. Much unlike the girl I had expected to find. But people change, I had changed. She kept to herself though she always seemed tense for some reason. Even when she was relaxed she was tense. I took note that even now as she slept, one hand on the memorial with a small white rose, the other was touching the hilt of a katana I had never actually seen her draw.

I had come for a reason so I started towards her. The pup growled threateningly standing protectively over its new master. I blinked calmly outstretching a hand which he promptly snapped at. I tried again and this time the pup took the time to sniff it for a moment. Storm seemed to be too smart as he looked at me in what I felt to be a scrutinizing sort of way. He then backed away before settling into a comfortable position next to Yukari. Taking this as permission I squatted down next to her staring placidly at the memorial, then next at the new name inscribed there.

_**Irenara Maya**_

So that's was whom she had come to visit. So now there were two Irenaras on the memorial. I briefly wondered if she even had any family left. The Hokage had said she hadn't a home but spoke nothing about family. It seemed rather odd to me that she was completely at ease with sleeping in a tree, though I'd never caught her in the act. And she didn't seem to remember me… I quickly dismissed the thought.

"Time does many things ne, Obito?" I muttered quietly looking thoughtfully at his name.

"Forgive me…" Yukari mumbled in her sleep. I didn't take my gaze away from the memorial.

"Took the words right out of my mouth." I don't know how long I had visited, how long I had stood here in this very spot repeatedly asking for forgiveness and waiting for a reply I knew would never issue. I was sure Yukari had done the same. Begging for forgiveness.

It's not as uncommon as I had once perceived; to find someone who understands. Even in this village a happy façade is sometimes just that. Even if there are more people who are blissfully unaware of the effects that ninja life has inflicted, there's still too many.

Of course most of us don't like to talk about our problems. I'm almost sure that if I asked Yukari she wouldn't tell me, she'd dance around the subject with her silver tongue and carefully chosen words. She wasn't quiet, no she had much to say, but conversation seemed to take a discreet turn when she became uncomfortable. Naruto? That boy's whole life is one hell of a sob story. He'd fear my reaction upon discovering the nine tails; he'd smile and say everything was just fine. And Sasuke? …Well… considering it's me he'd probably say something along the lines of 'it's no business of yours who I kill,' or 'I need to avenge them,' or hell, he might not say anything at all! Then Sakura… she seemed to be my only student without any serious mental set determined by the past. She was the lucky one… for now… Pain and sorrow came with the career, and I often wonder if it's worth it. She'll loose something eventually… we all do.

I blinked as the konichi next to me began to stir and quickly flitted away before her eyes opened. And I watched from my spot in a tree as she looked down at the small electronic device on her wrist. Yukari sighed and gracefully dropped the rose as she stood. "Come on Strom." She murmured. "Best not be late for waiting for the lazy ass." I sweat dropped, I wasn't that lazy.

She walked to the edge of the clearing, to my pleasure not noticing me, before turning her head as though she had been spoken to. Then she smiled; a real smile that even I could see through the rain and one I admit to have never seen this current Yukari use. "Heh, don't worry… I'll come back… I promised you, I wouldn't forget."

Her comment left me thoughtful, but it's best not to dwell on things such as this, as I had learned in the past. Nor should I dwell on the smile, for it is not my place to do so, nor is it in me to pry. But I would store away these bits of information as I knew I couldn't stop myself from doing so. Yes she sure had changed, but a lot can happen in seven years, many people have changed.

"Time does many things ne, Obito."

-------------------------------------**The Fillers are Finished!!!!--------------------**----------------

My eyebrow twitched in irritation. They were taking too long and I wanted to get this over with. As not to draw unwanted attention I had decided I would give my position second, no matter who was first. Summers Storm, on the other hand, was in a small clearing at my left playing in the cutest fashion with a butterfly, as if sensing it would not effect the mission.

"Sasuke; I'm at point B." Came marvelously clearly through my radio.

"Thank god." I scoffed before pushing the button. "Sarcastic Bitch to Scarecrow, I've reached point D… Scarecrow? Sarcastic Bitch would like to know 'why we need a point D?' over." What, I'm not allowed to have fun with the radio? Boredom calls for desperate measures!

"Scarecrow humbly requests that Sarcastic Bitch changes her highly inappropriate name." I grinned at his comment and faked thought, though I knew he couldn't see me.

"Sarcastic Bitch refuses, over."

"Sakura here, I'm at point C!" The pink menace said in a bubbly way. Okay, maybe she wasn't that bad. She has a good heart really, but she's just so… so _'Annoying.' _Sasuke's phrase for it came to mind and I had to admit it fit rather well.

"Naruto; I'm at point A. Believe it!" I breathed a small sigh. Poor slow Naruto, we'll need to work with him on that one.

"You're slow, Naruto." Kakashi reprimanded. "Okay, squad 7-- The target has moved. Follow it!" I shot from my point into another tree with a demon-like grace, noticeable even in a world such as this. And my pride soared as my little pup followed in an equal manner. He wouldn't climb the tree, but he managed to find grace in the bushes on the ground.

"Target spotted; 6 meters down, 2 away." I whispered into my headset. A flash alerted me to Uchiha's presence at my right, though in another tree entirely and that bright orange blob I'd have to be daft to miss was Naruto's form below me. Sakura must have been on the other side of the clearing. Yes, her position would require it.

"What's your distance from the target?" Kakashi asked and my eye twitched, I had given him my position.

"5 meters," Naruto answered. "I'm ready, just give the signal."

"I'm ready too," Sasuke said.

"I'm ready." Pinky replied.

"Are you ready Yukari?" Kakashi asked and I pouted, I was ready before all of them but I answered while crouching low.

"Simple capture: get in, get out, get paid, go home. Got it!" I chirped.

"Now!" Kakashi instructed and the entire team leapt towards our waiting prey. Despite our superior speed it was Orangeman who made it to the target first. The cat screeched furiously as its claws attacked Naruto's face mercilessly.

"I got him! I got him!" Naruto said still struggling. The poor kid. His face was a mass of bleeding cuts; long but shallow that complimented his whiskers. My left hand twitched, for some reason this scene bothered me, it was only a few scratches.

/That thing would be dead if it were Maya, or maimed if it were Kanoke./

I blinked, that had made sense. If this was Tanner we were talking about then maybe I wouldn't care but this was Orange Man! 'He's the little fox boy!' And image of fan art Naruto filled my head with him with fox ears.

/Naruto calls you Onee-chan; that could have an impact. That and I love animals!/

"Ah so I have a soft spot for animals do I?" I mused. I swept over to Naruto snatching the angry kitten from him by the fur of its neck. On instinct it stilled and I held it to my face, confident it would do me no harm. "Now you be quiet. I can't help that your owner's a fat old hag but I can tell you she cares, obviously, or she'd just get a new cat!" It blinked large eyes back at me and I found myself smiling.

"Mew." I positively glowed and cradled the animal gently.

"Awe!" Of course Sakura seemed to be right with me on how cute this thing was.

"Evil cat." Naruto grumbled sulkily.

"NARUTO!" Pinky warned.

"Can you verify ribbon on its right ear?" Kakashi interrupted.

"Affirmative, we have a positive id." Sasuke answered, peering with covered interest over my shoulder. Unfortunately I was a little too wrapped up in the kitten in my arms to notice or I could have called him cat-lover.

/ha-ha, I just pictured Sasuke with kitty eyes! Kawaii!/

'O.o what the hell?'

"Right, lost pet, Tora, captured," Scarecrow announced lazily. "Mission accomplished."

"Can't we get a better mission then this!?!?!" Naruto shouted into his mic. Sasuke and Sakura covered their ears in pain and I squeaked as the cat went ballistic up my shirt. It hissed poking its tiny head out of my top, something that didn't bother me since Storm did it all the time. "I hate cats!" Naruto glared.

"You're just jealous cuz you don't have the guts to go up my shirt." I teased. Naruto's face paled noticeably.

---------------------------------------------- ------------- -----------------------------------------------

"Stupid cat! That kitty deserves to be squashed!" Naruto laughed triumphantly as the cat and its owner were once again reunited. She had far too much makeup on and a ring for every finger. The woman crushed the poor cat to her chest warmly and practically strangled the animal while repeatedly thanking them. I shook my head. Summers Strom had somewhat jealously popped up my shirt in the cats place after it had been swept away and showed no remorse for Tora.

/Poor Tora-chan/

"Now then, for squad seven's next mission; we have several available tasks," the Hokage murmured thoughtfully. My eyebrow rose, shouldn't there be like a 'no smoking' sign in this place? But I guess that pipe of his never left his mouth. "Among them are babysitting the chief councilor three-year-old, helping his wife to do the shopping, digging up potatoes,"

My left hand twitched; oh boy, what a list!

"Noooo!" I blinked and looked around to ensure that it hadn't been me who voiced the complaint. Of course it was Naruto who was making the Hokage stop and look at him. "I want to go on a real mission!" He claimed striking a pose that I found utterly hilarious. "Something challenging and exciting! Not this little kid stuff! Come on old man!"

"I agree." I said passively and my team's eyes were suddenly on me.

"HA! SEE!?" And now they weren't.

Iruka's hands slammed firmly down on the desk in front of him. "How dare you! You're just a brand new genin with no experience! Like everyone else you start with simple mission to develop your skills and improve yourself!" Huh, Iruka looks really funny when he's shouting. Like bloated funny. Ha.

"Are you serious?" Orange Man started again. "Babysitting is not a mission! It's just a stupid,"

"Would you put a lid on it?" Kakashi said calmly whacking Naruto upside the head to silence him.

"Naruto, it seems you do not understand the tasks you have been given," the Hokage stated.

I blinked as I felt something brush against my cheek. 'What the, oh…" I smiled softly, looking down at Summers Storm, frosty blue and crimson clashed when our eyes met and his gaze held a distinct message, 'I'm bored.' I pulled him out of my top and set him on the ground where he padded lightly over to Sasuke. I twitched, Summers Storm tugged on Sasuke's shorts, who in turn ignored he poor creature. Thank god whatever the Hokage was saying I'd heard before, like a thousand times. He growled and trotted instead to Naruto who was already sitting on the floor. Well he was gonna but Naruto was giving off a rather annoyed vibe that the dog went around to Kakashi. The Scarecrow, much to my delighted surprise, bent down and absently scratched the pup behind his ear. Since when had they gotten so close? The only reason Strom wanted Sasuke's attention, I figured, was because it was something he could never seem to get. He had wanted Naruto's attention because, well let's face it, everyone loves Naruto. He relatively avoided Sakura because he was smart enough to know his master didn't particularly like Pinky. But Kakashi… huh. Neat.

"Silence!" Sandaime said in a raised tone. I looked around to discover several guilty looking faces and Scarecrow rubbing the back of his head sheepishly.

"Oh, sorry," Kakashi said, the Hokage sighed.

"You're always lecturing me like you're my grandfather or something! But, I'm not the little brat that used to pull pranks!" Naruto yelled a bit louder then usual. "I'm a ninja now and I want a ninja mission!" He pouted, well, childishly. Ha-ha.

"I'm going to hear about this later..." Kakashi grumbled, unable to put any form of concern behind his voice as Summers Storm bumped his leg again.

"Naruto wants us to know he's not a brat. He's a former brat," the Hokage repeated smirking beneath his pipe.. "And he wants a mission... so be it."

"Huh?" ya that did seem to be the general reaction of everyone in the room.

"What?" Sasuke asked, probably the only one capable of forming coherent sentences. So, Naruto's whining landed us the dangerous mission?

"Since you are so determined, I'm going to give you a C-rank mission," Naruto seemed totally shocked by the old mans words and I found a smirk begging to show at the tip of my lips. "You are in fact the only four manned team. You will be body guards on a journey." The Hokage decided still assessing our team with weary eyes.

"Really...?" Naruto said turning his head. "Yes! Who? Are we guarding a princess or some important lord,"

My eyes just barely caught the sign of Sakura's longing hand and its intense desire to bop Naruto over the head.

"I will bring him in now," the Hokage confirmed all too happy to see Naruto excitement. "Send in our visitor!" We all waited in anticipation for our client but I could smell alcohol even before the door opened. The man walked in, looking scruffy and old, and drunk and disheveled. Oh dear me, it was worse in person. He even had a bottle of wine grasped firmly in his hand. I twitched.

"What the-- a bunch of snot-nosed kids?" He grumbled in distaste and took a swig of sake as though to wash out the taste. My eyes narrowed, it was a tacky comment really, coming from this ho-bo. "You, the little one with the idiotic look on your face," the man said pointing. "Do you really expect me to believe you're a ninja?" The target was directed at Orange Man, who started to laugh.

"Who's the little one with the idiotic look on his f…" Orangeman's words died out as he took a good look around, the only one shorter then him was me. Now this was different, my height made me just barely shorter then Naruto so did that make the comment directed at me?

/THAT ASSHOLE!/

"Hey! You can't insult Angel like that!" Orange Man defended, and quite frankly I agreed. A small dark cloud loomed over my head as Kakashi restrained Naruto by the collar of his jumpsuit.

"You can't demolish our clients, it doesn't work that way." Scarecrow sighed with little effort.

"But I can't just let him get away with that!" Naruto exclaimed. I smiled softly for a short moment before wiping my face clean of any expression other then a glare.

"Kit." I held up a hand to silence him and oddly enough he complied.

"I'm the super expert bridge builder, Tazuna. I expect you guys to super protect me until I get back to my country and complete the bridge." He said expectantly and my eyes narrowed at the obvious chance he was giving me. In a flicker I used chakra to make me appear in front of lazy jerk, making it look like it was an easy matter though it had, in fact, taken quite a bit of effort.

"Tazuna, was it? I've no doubt you weren't talking about me just now, but let me make one thing perfectly clear." It was amazing how I could look menacing when I had to drag him by his shirt to make eye level. "It is very unwise of you to insult me or my team and should you do it again I warn you now. We might, accidentally get distracted while protecting you." I let go letting another Xelloss smile light up my face. "So be nice okay!" He looked positively bewildered.

**----------------------------------------------------- ------------------------------------------------------**

I didn't really pack much for the mission. You know, the essentials: Tooth brush, jacket, canteen, iPod, katana, dagger, a few normal ninja weapons, pretty much everything I owned. I didn't bother to purchase a bedroll, assuming of course wherever we would camp would have a tree or two there wouldn't really be a problem. So packing mostly consisted of me going home to get my tooth brush.

/wow, we have soooo much stuff./

'yep, defiantly a girly girl.' I laughed quietly. I stood up holding silk pajamas and wondering if I should bring them or not. Hinata had given them to me so that she could wash my clothes every now and then. She had offered and, let's face it, it's really quite hard to refuse the girl. I blinked rapidly in sudden realization. 'Hinata doesn't know I'm leaving.'

Tucking the pajamas into my very mini backpack that was mostly for holding Summers Strom then anything else, and I took off through the trees. Time was on my side and thanks to Hinata's routine I knew what relative area she was in. Granted her team would be with her but I didn't particularly mind them, 'I haven't formally met them yet anyway.' I thought, my usual smirk sliding back into place.

And indeed my memory was not one to fail for as I neared the compound I picked up Hinata's chakra signature as well as two others. One was bright and exuberant next to Hinata's soft sort of pulse, and the other… it was strange to say the least. As I grew closer and the figures came into view it was this signature that I focused on. It writhed like a swarm of blackening energy spotted with blue. It was quite fascinating what lay behind that high color and round sunglasses. It was the first pact chakra I had honed on. Did they all look like that?

I put on a burst of speed. In an admirable flash I was on them with my arm slung comfily around the Hyugas shoulders. Hinata to my surprise didn't faint this time. Ha-ha, she usually faints when I do that. "Hinata-chan!" I addressed fondly.

"Y-Yukari!" She stuttered out. "You k-know you r-really shouldn't d-do that."

"Awe but Hinata-chan," I blinked in fake surprise and my hand stopped in mid wave. "I see you have company." The comment came out pleasurably dry.

"Ah, r-right. Yukari-chan, these a-are m-my teammates." She began and I pulled away expecting proper introduction. I was not disappointed. "Kiba-kun and Akamaru," She said pointing to a boy with a hooded jacket.

"Uh, hey." His face sported two red marks on his cheeks and tucked happily away in the front of his jacket was a white dog. His expression however suited perfect bewilderment at my arrival.

"Inuzuka." I acknowledged to help the atmosphere, it was easy since I remembered them both from anime, and he grinned.

"You better believe it!"

"And Shino-kun." Hinata offered. My eyes then found another boy considerably quieter; dark hair and sunglasses. A high white color hid the bottom half of his face but he seemed rather at ease. His one raised eye brow gave him an interested look though his very bored hello contradicted my thoughts.

"Aburame, correct?" My eyes sized them up finding both boys to be taller then me, though that was nothing new, still Shino's chakra thrived like the hive within him. It was really neat to look at. His other eyebrow shot up but he nodded.

"And you are?" Kiba, who I knew for a fact to be the more talkative one of the group, asked.

"Forgive my manners, I wasn't expecting Hinata's team." I offered quietly. Hinata blinked at the lie but otherwise said nothing. "I'm Yukari, Irenara Yukari." I had figured long before now that this was a nice way to introduce ones self.

/You just wanna imitate James Bond/

"Ah yes." I said turning back to the shy Hyuga and taking my backpack off. Summers Storm promptly hopped out as I dug through and tackled Hinata in familiarity. She giggled trying to fend off the pups tongue. I stopped and resisted the urge to palm my forehead at my forgetfulness. " I'd like ya'll to meet Summers Storm."

Kiba nodded taking keen interest in the pup and bent down. "Sharp." He commented running his experienced thumb along Storms canines, but what really surprised me was that Summers Storm was letting him. "My sister works with wolves all the time." He explained and I watched as Akamaru sniffed the other pup with interest. Summers Storm was actually bigger then him, I think he's growing.

I had to stop myself from asking, 'wolf?' I had been pretty convinced that Strom was nothing more then a husky… that looked a lot like a wolf. Best not to ask, first impressions and all that there.

Finally I drew out the silk pajamas Hinata had lent me. "I figured you'd want them back." She blinked wide milky eyes at me before smiling gently.

"Y-you can keep them, Y-Yukari-chan." She mumbled. "We're t-the same s-size you k-know?" I nodded but only awkwardly. For one thing, they were a very light lavender, not that it's not pretty but I preferred the darker colors. And then of course there's the matter of them getting wet, though I can't imagine how that would happen, they'd be close to see through. Hinata, why do you even own these? That's it, that's what I wanted to ask. But damn you Hinata and you're cuteness! THAT'S IT! I tackled her in a hug though careful not to brake her. "Eep." She eeped! Ha-ha. Her teammates watched the exchange in complimentary quiet confusion. No wait, I'm lying, Kiba was positively howling with laughter. The fact was every now and then I had made it known to Hinata that if she got too cute I would tackle her. Fact.

"You're so cute Hinata-chan!" I announced pulling away lightly. And suddenly the tenseness left I was at ease. "Can you take a break in your training to walk a lunatic to the gates?"

"Y-You're leaving! W-why?"

"Don't worry, it's just a mission. I'm protecting some important bridge builder on the way to the Waves." I'm so good at bragging discreetly.

"That d-doesn't s-sound like a D-c-class mission."

See I told ya so.

"It's not, but don't worry too much, my team's borderline amazing. I'd bring ya so you could save me from having to converse with Pinky or that moody son a,"

"Yukari!"

"Heh, sorry Hinata-chan." I apologized rubbing the back of my head sheepishly. "Any-la-who, I don't think they'd let me bring you anyway. So what do ya say?"

"I could use a break!" Kiba volunteered, but I recognized someone seizing a chance when I saw them. "I'm hungry anyhow." And there was the reason.

"How about you Shades, you coming?" Yep Shino's got a nickname. I wasn't too sure but I think he blinked behind those sunglasses of his before shrugging neatly. I smiled widely as I would whenever in Hinata's presence and hooked arms with the two of them. I suddenly felt much happier. "Then let us go off into the sunset."

"Uh, i-it's s-still morning, Yukari-chan." Hinata pointed out.

"Er, right, uh… let just get going then, ne?" She nodded and I rolled my eyes before walking. Shino to my surprise either didn't care that I had hooked arms with the two of them or he didn't find it worth arguing about, either way he stayed quiet the whole time.

"S-so when will you'll be back, Yukari?" I grinned, partly because the silence was broken and partly because Hinata was feeling comfortable enough to talk almost without the stutter.

"Eh, who knows? It'll be awhile I can feel it, but I'll let you know when we return. Maybe I can spend the night ne? Would Hiashi chop my head off?" Yep, defiantly more relaxed then usual.

"I don't think he'd chop your h-head off… exactly." I laughed at that. "But you are my training partner. T-that should count for something."

"You're lucky to have a good team Hinata." I said, seriously forgetting that Shino was attached to my other arm, I'm talented I know. "I mean come on, Inuzuka's are pretty famous here in Konaha for tracking and Aburame, whew, don't even get me started on them. Because of their pact they can track, fight, kick some serious ass-"

"Yukari." I hung my head,

"Must you always correct me if I'm swearing?" She nodded and I sighed. "Oh, ha-ha, hi Shades! How long you been there?" I laughed again realizing his presence.

"You seem to know quiet a bit about the Konaha Clans." Shino commented and I shrugged to hide that I'd caught the suspicion in his tone.

"Ya, it comes in handy, but seriously. I've got Uchiha and Haruno. I swear Uzumak is the only good thing I'm working with." Hinata's face lit up like a roman candle. It is roman right?

"Uchiha are famous as well." He commented shortly and Hinata giggled.

"Yukari and Sasuke-san don't get along too w-well." She explained, I however found this an understatement.

"He hates me Hinata-chan!" I pouted. "He thinks I'm gonna do whatever the heck he wants just cuz he's got well over half the female population of Konoha trying to rape him." Hinata's laugh grew. "No really!"

"I'm s-sure he's not that bad." She chuckled.

"Ya whatever." That however ended our lovely conversation as I quite suddenly found myself at the gates and eight feet away stood the popsicle himself, apparently he was the first one there. "Well I'm afraid this is where we must part Hinata-chan." I said unhooking myself from the two of them.

"I guess s-so." She said offering me a quiet smile. I threw my arms around her again and again she eeped. If I could cry chibi tears I swear I would, but that's something I had yet to learn.

"You know," I started pulling away, "you could always stay and see Uzumaki off." I teased. Her face lit up again.

"N-no I s-should probably m-meet Kiba-kun a-at the r-restaurant." The stutter was proof enough.

"If you must." I complied, releasing her. "Thanks for the Pajamas." I then walked over too poor Shino, the loner. "Hey Shades nice meeting ya." I said sticking out my hand.

"Indeed." He replied and shook it.

"So how fast can your bugs strip chakra anyway?" His eyebrow shot up yet again. It was getting rather fun to watch.

"A second." Was all he said and my grin widened considerably.

"You are so cool haha." He gave me a strange look. "You know what? You should let me borrow your sunglasses sometime ne?" I asked slyly.

"No."

"Ah well it was worth a shot." I turned to stand next to Sasuke and waved as they walked away. "Say bye to Inuzuka for me will ya!" I was yelling now as they got farther away. "And for god's sake Hinata use the mother fucking senbon!"

"Yukari!"

"I'm serious! If you're not using them by the time I get back, I'll… uh, hug you to death!" I was sure she was laughing now but then again they may have been out of ear shot for that last part who knows?

"You'll hug her death?" Popsicle scoffed as my strange smile yet again receded till it was once again my impassive expression.

"Yeah, I can't really hurt her you know?" It surprised him that I was talking to him at all really, considering the fact I seemed to hate him. And believe you me it was an impression I worked to keep.

"Why?" He asked curiously. And for a moment I swear I forgot who it was I was actually talking to, where I was and how utterly uncomfortable this conversion should be for me.

"Because," My crimson eyes softened in a way I'm sure Sasuke had never seen them do, "she reminds me, of someone… who was… very precious to me."

"Who?" He prompted in a rather unSasuke-like manner, yet I barely heard him at all. My heart ached. Hinata reminded me of her. Of Maya. Granted Maya was louder then Hinata, there was just something there; that need to protect her, that feeling of ease, where I could smile and cuss and just act like a complete idiot. And of course Maya had always been too cute for her own good.

"That person I failed to protect…" A very soft laugh escaped me as I realized the absurdity of where I was, who I was with and how very uncomfortable this conversation actually was. In an instant my body tensed. "Parting is such sweet sorrow, ne, Uchiha-san?" I quoted in a sudden steely voice. Silence blanketed us, and it didn't appear as though the young Uchiha could bring himself to ask more questions then he already had. Just as well though, I wouldn't answer anymore questions.

"Hey Sasuke-kun! Yukari-chan!" And then there was Pinky! She stopped as she neared us though not before placing herself very near Sasuke. "I'm all ready to go!"

"Indeed." I replied eyeing the pack on her back. She blinked at me as though just noticing something and then pointed in shock.

"Is that all you're bringing?" I shrugged.

"I wouldn't even have a pack if I didn't think Storm would be up my shirt the whole way there." I said in a bored fashion. She tilted her head in confusion and as though to confirm my statement Summers Storm promptly popped his head out of the pack.

"B-but what about a bedroll!? A change of clothes?! The essentials?!" She insisted.

"Believe you me Pinky, I'm more then ready for this trip. Sleeping in a tree or on forest floor never killed anyone. Well… maybe it did but I assure you it wasn't because they didn't have a bedroll." I sighed. "And if it's weapons you're worried about," I smirked arrogently. "I've more then many hidden on my persona." When she still looked uncertain I sealed the deal. "Besides if you're that worried about it, I could always use your bedroll and you could share Popsicles." That did the trick. And then she slipped into her own little world. Sasuke shot a glare in my direction and I smiled sweetly.

Then miracle of miracles occurred. Only seconds later when Kakashi was, drum roll please, on time! Tazuna trailed comfily behind peering at us skeptically through his glasses. "Where's the brat?" He grumbled.

"Naruto's just a little late Tazuna-san." Sakura explained brightly before turning and clenching her fist. 'If he's not here soon he's dead!' My eyes widened and I quickly jabbed a finger in my ear in hopes to clean it out. Should I have been able to hear that???

"Hey guys!" Yelled an exuberant voice. The very orange figure came barreling towards us at high speeds… and unable to stop. 'Chakra wall, chakra wall!' I thought desperately trying to build up enough chakra in time to execute the new move I had learned and in the same second giving up. There was simply no time. My body actually relaxed, which made absolutely no sense. I should at least have been bracing for impact. Naruto came to an abrupt halt, skidding clumsily over the dirt before stopping an inch away. We blinked at each other and he burst out laughing. "What luck!" He shouted.

'Luck? I'm not lucky…'I thought

/Perhaps our luck has changed, ne? It's because you're more out going! You're making friends Bubbles-chan!!!! I'm so proud!/

'I wish I could have used that technique though.'

/You just wanna show off!/

'Shut up.'

"ALL RIGHT!" Naruto shouted throwing his fists into the air. "Let's get going!"

"What's got you all excited." Sakura asked without much concern.

"Well," Naruto started, taking in the scenes in a much exaggerated way, "this is the first time I've left the village! I'm a traveler now! Believe it!"

"Am I supposed to trust this brat with my life?" The bridge builder drawled pointing in annoyance. "This kid's a joke!"

"He's with me and I'm a jonin so you don't need to worry," Kakashi assured though Naruto seemed to sink into himself before,

"Hey! Never insult a ninja!" Orange Man shouted. "It's a big mistake! And I am one of the greatest ninja ever. Someday, I'll be the greatest Hokage and then you will have to look up to me! My name is Naruto Uzumaki, remember it!!" He demanded making a rather hilarious face.

"Hokages are powerful and wise, you are puny and brainless." Tazuna continued and I shook my head anticipating a future head ache. "The day you become Hokage is the day I sprout wings and fly." And here it is.

"Shut up! I'm willing to do anything to become Hokage! No matter what it takes! And when I do, everyone will have to admit that I'm the top ninja, including you!"

"I wouldn't acknowledge you even if you do become Hokage, ten times over!" The bridge builder snorted in a kind of disbelief. It was Kakashi who held Naruto back from destroying Tazuna as I couldn't bring myself to stop him. He deserved a punch in the face, he's the one lying to us after all!

"Can we just go?" Kakashi mumbled nothing short of throwing Naruto back on the path ahead of us.

Time found us uhh still walking… and walking and walking. Don't get me wrong I wasn't particularly tired or anything but the phrase 'boredom until death' comes to mind if you get. I couldn't listen to my iPod anymore, it was burning up, and the last thing I wanted to do was break it! It had been a short while since Pinky asked about the land of Waves and Tazuna fed us the information. Though I think I went into a temporary coma of boredom where I didn't wake up till we were reprimanded for doubting our Hokage. We had fallen into a formation involving Naruto several feet in the lead and Sasuke once again using me to put distance between the Pink Menace and himself. 'Selfish bastard.' I however, wasn't too busy to notice Sakura steadily getting closer to me. But of course I dismissed this as Sasuke's fault.

/The girls of Konaha really do want to rape him!/

'I'm not surprised.'

/What? You wanna rape him too!/

'Gah! Of course not, what's the matter with you!?'

"Hey, Yukari?" I blinked. How very strange I could swear Sakura just spoke to _me. _

"Yukari." Or perhaps I'm not going crazy after all.

"Hn," I acknowledged.

"Uhh, I was wondering…" My brow furrowed as she caught my interest. What could she possibly want from me? 'Switch places perhaps?' I mused. "You don't like Sasuke-kun right?" She whispered.

My eyebrow shot up and I rolled my head to give her the most obvious look wondering 'what could that possibly have to do with anything?'

"Good." She breathed out and I forced myself to 'put the eyebrow back down.' "Everyone else likes him so it's difficult to get any advice and there's no way I'm going to my mom." She laughed though still careful to keep quiet. This caused me to briefly wonder if Uchiha could hear us anyway, and then I stopped and focused solely on the word, 'advice.'

"You want my advice?" My brow furrowed considerably and took a swig from my newly bought canteen to clear my head.

"Well ya. I figured if you don't like Sasuke you simply must have a boyfriend!" My eyes widened at this I took a sharp breath… of water. I choked. What in gods name had possessed her to think something like that? What, how, when had my reputation for not liking the Uchiha deemed me as taken!? "Are you okay Yukari-chan?"

I gave a pathetically disbelieving laugh that held a very clear statement. 'You're crazy.' "Can I tell you something honestly?" I faked a rather overdone tragic look, but it did the trick, now if I could fake cry, psh I hell I couldn't even real cry. But she nodded in odd concern. "I regret too inform you that I too was once a Uchiha fan girl." Her eyes widened to the size of dinner plates and I think I heard someone trip in the background. I tried not to grin when I pinned the noise to Sasuke. So he could hear us after all. "It's true, he was my first love. Even I can see the guys a total hottie." I lied on and on, wondering just how big I could make Sakura's eyes get. Don't get me wrong Sasuke is hot, but I don't like him. "But you see I gave up on him the day I discovered a very, very interesting secret." Her eyes grew farther and she leaned in to lap up my lie thirstily.

/You should have been in acting school Bubbles-chan!/

"What was it?" She asked in awe. I smirked and raised a hand.

"Why it's very simple-" I stopped suddenly and faked concern. "You promise not to tell anyone? It is a secret after all." She nodded drastically and motioned for me to continue. 'Yep, I should'a gone to acting school.' I leaned in but didn't lower my voice. "He's a homosexual!" I declared and Sakura properly anime fell. "Ah, life is good." I snickered cruelly.

"I was serious!" She cried catching up with me again.

"Haruno, It would be wise if you do not take offense in my cruel humor in the future." I chuckled. She seemed to calm down a bit though I have no idea why.

"Then you never were, I mean, you didn't actually, er, you,"

"Pinky, considering how long I've been in Konaha, it is not feasible for my story to be correct." I assured a small smirk still tugging lightly at the corners of my mouth.

"That was mean Yukari-chan!" She announced and I rolled my eyes. "Anyway I wanted to ask… Do you think Sasuke-kun likes me?" She asked hopefully and I twitched. How the hell should I know, was the first answer that came to mind, but that would end this conversation, no I couldn't end it yet even this was better then boredom! Sad isn't it?

"Well, he was pretty vague on his list of likes and dislikes…" She bit her lip. "Have ya asked him?" her face fell.

"Well ya, sort of…"

"I mean besides announcing your love the way fan girls do." I elaborated.

"I could never ask, really, I think I should be able to tell, you know?" I chuckled at this which surprised even me.

"Perhaps…" I sighed. " You know, someone once told me that, 'I could see love a mile away and on all sides including behind. But when love stands in front of me as clear as a summer's day I am blind to all attempts.'" She looked thoughtful at my statement as though truly taking my words to heart. "May I ask you a question Haruno?" She nodded even as we walked over the mini bridge. "Is it the young Uchiha that drives you?" She looked confused. "A thing the drives you; revenge, love, ect." She blinked.

"Ye," I stared at her hard to make sure she made the right answer. "I'm not sure." She stated finally. "I think yes."

"That is a good answer." I commended turning away again. My eyes caught the tell tale puddle and I built up my chakra again. This time I would be able to use that technique. Really it was rather useful to know what was to come in life. Yay for TV! 'Act normal… you were… talking to Sakura!' "You are young and though something 'drives' everyone it is not expected for all to know. To ask Naruto now he would tell you his drive was 'to be Hokage.' A more accurate answer I know, but it is not my place to tell you." 'That was normal right?'

/Defiantly convinced me!/

'That doesn't mean much.'

/…HEY!/

"What drives you Yukari?" She suddenly asked curiously. "Love or revenge or what?" I blinked a small smile curling at my lips even as I felt chakra surge behind me and heard the rustle of chains.

"Nothing…" I said sadly, feeling my heart clench in my chest. "I have nothing."

And so chains erupted behind us wrapping themselves around our sensei and constricting movement. Kakshi's eyes widened and in that moment when the chains were pulled, Kakashi was torn apart.

"KAKASHI-SENEI!" Naruto cried.

A/N: that is the longest chapter I have ever written in my entire life. And so like 27 pages later chapter six finally ends! Also I would like to celebrate this being the 100th page of this fanfic! The longest thing I have ever written. And there is much more to come! I'm getting rather into it! Any-la-who Please Review! It really does help to animate me to write the next chapter. **Next Time in Fuck I Think My TV"s Broken; **interrogation, boat ride, singing, villainy ranting, inappropriate comments at inappropriate times. Sharingan, Zabuza, and hate so strong it burns, Next time on Chapter 7: **There's No Fucking Way**

"_Shit, he's gonna eat our sensei!" eyes on me. 'Did I say that aloud???' I looked around comically. "Eheh, please continue with you're villainy rant." Sasuke smacked my head._

"_Are you trying to get us killed?"_

"_Itai, don't hit me again Popsicle. He plans to kill us anyway, I don't think anything I say is really gonna matter!" I shot back. "Besides, you can't see his mouth for all we know he could have shark teeth that devour his enemy!" I didn't mean it, but it made Uchiha stop talking didn't it?_


	8. There's No Fucking Way

**AN:** Alrighty my sweet loves. Sorry for taking so long. Summers been kind hectic. I'm moving again. I hate moving. My sister is moving out with a friend and we had to help her, so that kinda sucked. Now it's just mom and me and we're moving all our shit. God we have so much shit! How did we keep it all in the house!!! But we won't even start till we find a good apartment near my high school. Any-la-who ha-ha, I do hope you like this chapie, I have thing for the title myself! But I digress! Enjoy my loves!

**EHEM:** I dedicate this chapter to my friend Drowning In Fire 'cuz uhh she asked me to write this chapter for her! (shrugs) I'm a simple person.

**Disclaimer:** Do I always have to write one!? Okay, I swear by the Ice cream I'm currently eating, I do not own Naruto!

**Chapter 7**

**There's No Fucking Way**

**(Hate Is A Strong Word, But I Really, Really, Really, Don't Like you)**

Sakura stumbled back crying out in horror. My reaction, however, was more of an odd smirk. I suppose if any of my allies had been paying attention they'd think I knew something they didn't, fact was I actually did. But then the enemy appeared behind Naruto. Their heads carried Mist forehead protectors and a gasmask covered both their noses and their mouths. I froze momentarily as my eyes landed on theirs.

"You're next." One laughed to a petrified Naruto. He had cold eyes, killer eyes… And at that moment my instincts went into overdrive. All the chakra I had built up only continued to rise with the hairs on the back of my neck as it ran rampant through my veins. My eyes focused and my mind cleared of all except one thought, 'Protect Kit.'

Sasuke leapt up throwing shuriken to pin their connected chain to a nearby tree and an extra kunai to ensure he had rendered the weapon useless. Shocked, the two nin played right into Uchiha's hands as he grasped at their large claw ridden gauntlets and whirled into an admirable double kick to each of their jaws. Their reactions were instantaneous as they disconnected from their chain and went around the Uchiha kid; one heading for Tazuna, the other… Orangeman.

I rushed forward and was barely too late as one of the brothers claws managed to nick Naruto's hand. Fury pounded through my blood at my mistake. "Arragh!" I seized the clawed hand and pulled the fool forwards. Shifting my weight I managed to flip the bastard. He was fast but I was faster. Even as he rose my hand darted forward and tore at the gas mask over his face before thrusting my other palm forward. I was rewarded with a satisfying crack as his nose broke. Even then my foot sailed into his gut sending him skidding backwards. I was ready to rush towards him again before I realized it was already over.

"He used the replacement jutsu!" Naruto exclaimed. I shook my spinning head and replayed the strangely vague images of what I had just done. I caught my recent opponent's eye and felt a rolling sensation in my throat, a growl if you will. It was then I realized, as Kakashi held both brothers in a strangle hold, that had he not intervened, I would not have stopped. I snapped both my eyes shut.

"Naruto, sorry I didn't help you right away, I didn't mean for you to get hurt," Kakashi said still with had a choke hold on the ninja. "I just didn't think you freeze up like that." Scarecrow commented walking towards Popsicle and Pinky. "Good job Sasuke, very smooth. You too Sakura. And Yukari," He said turning to me, "remind me never to make you too angry." I jerked my head in frigid sort of nod before turning and helping Naruto to his feet.

"Hey." Sasuke smirked cockily at Naruto. "You're not hurt are you... scaredy cat?"

"Ice Cube!!!" I said, opening both eyes to stare into his own while trying to remove the fury from the fight previously. "Now I know you ment to say 'oh Naruto are you alright???" I imitated dramatically. "Cuz that would be the teammately thing to say."

"I never asked you." He grumbled looking slightly put out.

"People rarely do." I shrugged grinning impishly. "Consider it a friendly improvise!"

"Friendly?" He scoffed.

"…" I thought for a moment. "Teammately!" I exclaimed.

"That's not even a word." He ground out in a low tone. I blinked a couple times.

"Yes it is." He took on a bewildered expression.

"I can assure it's not."

"And I can assure you it is!" I said nodding cutely.

"Teammately is not a word!" He practically shouted.

I appeared before him, his face only a few inches from my remarkable chibi expression. "Uh oh, the wittle Uchiha is loosing his wittle temper!" I giggled uncharacteristically.

"I-I am not!"

"Your face it turning red!" I then whipped out a book from absolutely nowhere and read the contents. "Teammately: an adverb for something done in a way that shows/expresses a feeling of well being to a comrade and or teammate!" I nodded my very chibi head in an intelligent fashion.

"I'm telling you it's not a word!" He insisted.

"And I'm telling you it is!" I huffed. He snatched my book away and stared down at the definition for the word he knew for a fact wasn't real… to find it there. He flipped the book over and stared at the cover.

"This isn't a real dictionary." He stated with a flat expression and he pointed to the front.

'This Isn't A Real Dictionary'

My chibi crimson eyes grew wide in awe and he had to lean back slightly as I got very close.

"Wh-what?" He stammered.

"I didn't know you could read!" he anime fell. Ha-ha I made Sasuke anime fall!!!

"SASUKE!" Naruto started.

"Naruto, stand still. These ninja had poison in their claws," Scarecrow interrupted, "you too Yukari." I blinked down having not noticed the small wound I had received upon first coming to Kit's aid. "We need to take out the poison as soon as possible. Don't move around, or it'll spread." He paused facing the bridge builder now. "By the way mister Tazuna..." Kakashi said.

"Yeah, what?" Tazuna replied.

"We need to talk," he answered. Kakashi quickly tied the demon brothers to a tree and all of us stood before them. We all had questions, we all wanted answers. Well except for me. I already knew so I didn't particularly care.

"They are chunin from the village hidden in the mist," Scarecrow continued in certainty. "Their specialty is relentless attack. They keep fighting no matter what the sacrifice." I saw Tazuna wince.

"How did you know about our ambush?" The one who had attacked Sakura asked. They weren't looking so threatening now. Kakashi seemed to think for a moment.

"Yukari, how did you know they were coming?" He asked finally, in a way that suggested he knew how I knew. I take it he wanted me to explain but now I was the one confused. How did he know that I knew? Ha-ha this is getting confusing. Everyone turned to me and I stared back into Kakashi's one lazy eye. "Your chakra build up." He explained. A smirk curved my lips, so that was it. I never even got to use the technique, I had been too rash.

"The puddle." I started. "A dry area, such as this, without rainfall for days on end; by hiding yourselves like that," my eyes darted to my opponent and I was pleased by his anger, "you revealed yourselves before you even attacked. A rather novice mistake for someone of your status I think."

"Shut up!" He shouted straining at his binds.

I leaned over to face him. "Or you'll what?" He growled and I smirked wickedly. "That's what I thought."

"How did I not notice?" Pinky pondered aloud and by the look on Sasuke's face I'm sure he was thinking the same thing.

"Well we were having a rather interesting conversation." I offered.

"But then why did you see it?" She asked.

"To be honest I've been edgy about this mission since we got our info on the Waves." I lied, remembering Tazuna's face in the anime. "You had no reason to suspect anything, Sakura, because you were told not to. The fact is anything can go wrong on a mission. Don't get me wrong, it's good that you trust your client. But anyone who knows my background will also know that I have good reason for my developed bad habit of strong distrust; making me weary before this whole charade began."

/Wow, you're a good liar Bubbles-chan!/

'Thank god of that ne?' I wondered subconsciously registering Sakura's pout and Sasuke's somewhat angry look.

"Very good Yukari!" My pride purred at Kakashi's compliment, I probably looked real smug right about now.

"In that case, why did you let the genin do the fighting?" The bridge builder asked.

"I could have taken them out quickly but then I would have learned nothing. I had to know who their target was." I watched in mild interest as Kakashi's eye darted quickly to Tazuna. "And what they were after..."

"What are you getting at?" Tazuna asked a bit nervously.

/Just give it up already, we know you're a lying cheat!/

"Just This; I wanted to know if they were attacking us; ninja fighting ninja or if they were after you; the master bridge builder." Scarecrow paused. "When you put in your request you asked for standard protection from robbers and highway men. You didn't say ninja were hunting you down." The bridge builder's head seemed to drop a little with each accusational sentence. "If we knew this it would have been a B-rank mission or higher. Our task was to simply get you to your destination and protect you where you finish the bridge. If we knew this we would have changed it and charged it accordingly. You must have your reasons, but lying to us is not acceptable. We are now beyond the scope of this mission."

"This mission is too advance for genin like us. We shouldn't do it. Besides, we need to get Naruto and Yukari to a doctor to get the poison out before it spreads any farther." Sakura said in relief… I shot her an angry glare. Giving up and leaving. Tch figures.

Naruto glared down at his still bleeding hand and I brought my own wrist up and sucked at the wound. "Naruto's hand could become a problem... Oh well, I guess we have to return to the village." Kakashi decided. My brow furrowed, that wasn't right. They carried out this mission.

My eyes suddenly widened in memory as I watched Naruto stab at the wound in the back of his hand with a kunai.Everyone gasped. Felt kinda left out myself so, "gasp." I said with some level of enthusiasm I could be proud of. Ice Cube blinked at me strangely but he seemed to be the only one to notice otherwise.

"Why am I so different? Why am I always so… argh!" Naruto cried out, he was loosing blood fast. I'm no doctor but if anyone's ever passed out from blood loss it's been me!

"Naruto you shouldn't—"

"I have to, Angel!" He shot back. "You shouldn't have to protect me! I worked so hard to get here, pushing myself until it hurt. Training alone for hours! Anything to get stronger and reach my dream." Naruto let out, tears pricking the corners of his eyes. "I will never back down again and let someone else rescue me. I will never run away and I won't lose to Sasuke! Upon this wound I make this pledge. Believe it!" Blood was hitting the ground now and he still hadn't removed the kunai. Should I be worried? "Bridge builder, I'll complete this mission and protect you with this kunai knife. Real ninja never give up and neither will I! Don't you guys worry about me! I'll be fine! So let's go!" Orangeman shouted with new found resolve.

"Naruto, it's great that you got the poison out but… if you lose anymore blood... you're going to die." What a wonderful monotone Kakashi. Really I'm impressed! I spat blood and continued to suck on my wound while watching the interesting shade of blue that had entered Naruto's face.

"Ahhhhhhhhh!" Orangeman yelled in hysteria.

"Really good idea to stop the blood now!" Kakashi sang. He seemed to be enjoying poor Naruto's reactions.

"No! No! No! I'm too young for it to end like this! No! No! No!" The boy whined like a trapped animal. I spat again.

"Show me your hand," Kakashi ordered.

"No! No! No!"

'Ha, can you say panic attack?'

/Oooh I can! I can!/

'Is it possible to mentally palm your forehead?'

/Why would you want to do something like that Bubbles-chan?/

(mentally palms forehead.)

"Ehh, you have a serious look on your face! You're scaring me, am I going to be okay?" Naruto fidgeted as Kakashi examined his hand with less then an expression. I focused on getting a look at Naruto's hand. Hell, I wanted to see someone who could healthat fast!

"Uh, yeah, you will be fine." Kakashi replies airily bandaging Naruto's wound, which I still couldn't see form here! I spat blood again, best to make sure to get all the poison.

"Does that mean we're continuing the mission, Kakashi-sensei?" Sakura asked slight nervousness entering her voice.

"Yes." Scarecrow determined.

"Angel-chan, is your wrist okay?! I was so worried about myself I forgot!" Naruto admitted and I laughed quietly against my wound but otherwise nodded to show I was fine.

--------------------------------------------------------- -----------------------------------------------------------

"We should be able to see the bridge soon," The man at the head of the boat announced. My eyebrow went up against my knowledge. The thing has a mind of its own! But I didn't particularly see how we'd be able to see anything in this fog. "If we move along the side of the bridge, we'll be at the Country of the Wave." I blinked looking down into the dark waters. They were clear and my own reflection blinked back at me in the silence of the night.

My eyes shot up as a shadow loomed overhead. "Whoa! It's huge!" Naruto announced.

"Quiet! I told you no noise! Why do you think we're traveling like this?" The man reprimanded. But Naruto was right, it was gigantic. I let a low whistle escape me at the sight of the bridge. Now I've never been to San Francisco but I don't think even that bridge had been quite this size. "Cutting off the engine and rowing, moving through the dense fog so they don't see us!" Orangeman's face turned another interesting color as he clamed hands down on his mouth.

"I'm going to right a book." I mumbled quietly as I sagged back against the boat. "The Many Colors of Orangeman's Face"

"Keh, no one would read that." Sasuke scoffed. I crossed my arms and pouted cutely.

"Mood Wrecker." I sniffled. His eyes widened.

/Ya, not the reaction you expected huh?/

"Mr. Tazuna...? Before we reach the shore, I have to ask you something," Kakashi informed. I sighed. How did I never notice that they talked so much? I mean sure I gave my little speeches every now and again but that's not boring!

/Only cuz you're the one talking/

'So?'

Storm popped his head out from my pack and yawned exposing sharp fangs. I smiled and tugged him into my lap. He kneed at my leg like a cat and lay down as I petted him. He sniffed at my wounded hand and licked it affectionately before turning to me. "Yep, you missed the action. Hope you had a nice nap." Storm dug his head under my hand again in hopes I would continue petting him. "Are you a cat now?" I asked but continued non the less, humming quietly to myself.

-----------------------------------------**----------------** --------------------------------------------------

I climbed out of the boat lifting the small animal back into his pouch. He whined a complaint clearly not wanting to stay inside. "No." I stated firmly. "They sent chunin last time, logic states it can only get worse from here on in. It's too dangerous. Protect the pajamas will you?" I closed the lid on the pack and he did not complain again. "Good boy."

"Okay, take me to my home and I mean get me there in one piece!" Tazuna ordered none too nicely.

'Don't make demands! You're lucky we're even gonna protect you're stupid ass at all!' But I held my tongue finding not even satisfaction would come from conflict.

"Right." Kakashi agreed as we began travel on foot… again.

Naruto, in a sudden burst of energy, took off ahead of us and looked around frantically, kunai in hand. Guess the stress was getting to him. He threw it in what I'd have guessed to be a random direction shouting, "Over there!' Everyone froze thinking thoughts along the same lines. "It was just a mouse," he admitted after a moment.

"Naruto, don't do that!" Sakura yelled.

"Careful Pinky, you're gonna get stress lines." I smirked and she whirled on me.

"What was that!?!?!?!" She seethed.

"Naruto, those are kunai knife! They're dangerous!" Scarecrow reprimanded.

"Hey, you dwarf! Don't scare us!" The bridge builder shouted. Someone's freaking out. Ha-ha

"I see someone hiding over there!" Orangeman continued. "No, is he over there? There!" Naruto threw another Kunai.

"Naruto cut it out!!!" Sakura yelled fists clenched at her sides.

"But I really did sense someone." Orangeman assured and I shook my head.

Kakashi lazily shifted through the bushes to find what Naruto had sensed. Indeed there was something there, something that I'm sure I'd have found normal had I not known for fact it was not. A white rabbit, terrified out of its mind with a kunai lodged between its two ears.

"Naruto you idiot!" Sakura cried bopping the boy over his head. I stilled, tense all over, my hand slowly making its way to the hilt of Winters Frost.

"A rabbit!" Naruto cried grief stricken. He rushed over to the creature cuddling it tightly to his face. "Oh, I'm sorry, little rabbit! I'm so sorry!"

"All this fuss over a rodent." Tazuna grumbled the stupid ass.

A surge of killing intent swept through the air, how, how could they not have felt it? "Look out!" Kakashi called.

"Get Down!" I dove for the ground taking Kit with me to insure his safety. Naruto grunted under my weight and had the circumstances been different I'd have smacked him a good one for implying I was fat. Ha-ha. Never-the-less I stood and looked up to the newest addition of life to our little party. He was tall lean and covered the lower half of his face in bandages. He stood on what had been thrown at us. A long sword type thing. I know there was a name for them but it escapes me. To put it blankly it was huge and lodged wonderfully in the tree above us. The man himself… could really have used some fashion advice. I'm no designer but he should sue the lady in the store who told him he looked good in those clothes. I once saw a picture on photobucket of Zabuza in a suit, it didn't look that bad. But come on, the guy's not even wearing a shirt. But I digress…

"Well, well, if it isn't Zabuza Momochi, the exiled ninja of the Hidden Village of Mist." Scarecrow was the first to speak, relaxed as ever though far more alert then I had ever seen him.

I felt Naruto prepare to spring at my side and readied myself in the likely event that I'd have to pull him back. "You're in the way. Get back." Kakashi stated coldly.

"But why--?" Orangeman whined eager to prove himself.

"He is not like those other ninja," Kakashi answered. "He's in a whole other league." I could feel the truth in his words, Zabuza was… a killer. Someone without remorse for the dead. Someone strong with chakra so powerful it choked the air around us. Someone we couldn't fight.

"I'm guessing you are Kakashi the Sharingan user." Zabuza acquainted. Sasuke's eyes shot to Kakashi, wide with surprise. It must hurt to know that you're alone then be shown a glimpse of hope before it is torn away. It must hurt greatly indeed.

'No little Uchiha,' I thought. 'He is not of your clan.'

"I'm sorry but you have to let me take the old geezer." Zabuza said.

"Everyone, form the swastika formation! Protect Tazuna-san and do not join the battle." Kakashi ordered his hand creeping up to his forehead protector.

'Swastika, Swastika, where have I heard that before… I think it was my third grade teacher's last name…'

"I taught you teamwork, now it's time to use it!" Kakashi applied ever so slowly lifting the plate over his eye. "I'm ready!" he said dramatically opening his eye to reveal its crimson depth.

"Crimson…" I muttered. I hated to admit it, but Sasuke had been sort of right. Add a few comas and I could pass for the Uchiha blood.

"I'm honored that I can see the Sharingan that I've heard about," Zabuza commented. Though really, there was hardly a change in his voice.

"You guys have been saying Sharingan, but what is it?" Naruto growled, how he hated not knowing things.

"Sharingan... The eye creates it, and it is the power that the pupil generates," Sasuke began, still relatively mesmerized. "The user of this visual jutsu or doujutso can instantly see and comprehend any genjutsu, taijutsu, and ninjutsu, and cancel their effects. Sharingan is one of the types of eyes that those doujutsu users possess. But that's the only ability the Sharingan possesses." Well fuck, now I want the Sharingan!

"You got it right boy," Zabuza affirmed in his deep tone. "But you only scratched the surface. The Sharingan can analyze the opponent's technique and then copy it to the smallest detail." He continued and a chill ran up my spine as an unnatural fog began to settle.

'Too thick… it's… it's hard to see.'

"When I was in the Hidden Village of Mist's assassination squad... your information was listed in the bingo book I carried asking for your capture." The demon himself told. "It also noted this… The man who copied more than 1000 techniques; Kakashi the Copy Ninja." A strange hunger entered his voice.

"Shit, he's gonna eat our sensei!" eyes on me. 'Did I say that aloud???' I looked around comically. "Eheh, please continue with you're villainy rant." Sasuke smacked my head.

"Are you trying to get us killed?"

"Itai, don't hit me again Popsicle. He plans to kill us anyway, I don't think anything I say is really gonna matter!" I shot back. "Besides, you can't see his mouth for all we know he could have shark teeth that devour his enemy!" I didn't mean it, but it made Uchiha stop talking didn't it?

"Let's cut the chit-chat here. I have to kill that geezer right away." Zabuza announced and I almost laughed as I again found myself between Pinky and Ice Cube with Winters Frost resting confidently in my hand. "But, Kakashi, it seems I have to defeat you first." Zabuza suddenly disappeared taking his zanbato with him. Ya I remembered the swords name, it's a horse killing thing if I'm right. He reappeared on the waters surface, how long has there been water there???

"He's there!" Orangeman pointed obviously as the enemy gathered a large amount of chakra.

And then more then suddenly Zabuza vanished again. 'No!' I thought. Sakura's obvious breathing was painfully loud and worse then hers the bridge builder. Naruto wasn't exactly quiet himself, but it was so loud it'd be easy for Zabuza to find us, and also, how was I supposed to hear him coming!? Sasuke, on the other hand I could have hugged, he was so quiet, if I didn't know any better I'd say he'd stopped breathing all together!

"He disappeared!"

'What a brilliant deduction Kit!' I thought holding back a growl. 'Where the hell is he…?'

"Kakashi-sensei?" Sakura said nervousness showing in her voice.

'Shut up you stupid girl!'

/That was a little harsh Bubbles-chan…/

"He'll try to eliminate me first," Kakashi assured. Now I may not remember every word they said, but I certainly remember what happened. "but," and here comes the bad feeling, "Zabuza Momochi, he was in the Hidden Village ANBU, and was know for his 'silent killing' techniques," Scarecrow continued, making me feel loads better! Psh!

"S-Silent?" Orangeman stuttered and I frowned peering at him through the fog.

"As the name suggests, it happens in an instant without sound or warning of any kind. It's so fast that you pass from this life without realizing what's happened. The Sharingan can not fully neutralize it, so don't lower your guard. Well, if we fail we only lose our lives." I sweat dropped.

"Easy for you to say Scarecrow, but I got me a promise to keep and a person to kill so I sure as hell an't dying here." I muttered twirling my dagger anxiously. A picture of Maya flashed through my mind followed by one of Orochimaru. Anyone who made me feel this queasy was bad news. It's called irrational hatred. It's not like the guy ever did anything to me but frankly I need a goal, mind as well be that one. Besides, he's the only one I think I dislike enough to kill.

"The mist is getting thicker and thicker!" Naruto panted bringing me out of my little world.

"The Land of Waves is surrounded by ocean, the swirling mist is ever present," Tazuna explained though his voice was strained with signs of fear. I though I was gonna snap a tendon I was so tense, and just when I though it was impossible the intensity increased as Kakashi disappeared into the fog.

"Eight points," Growled a deep throaty voice.

'Zabuza.' Yes I remembered this part.

"The larynx, spine, lungs, liver," I cut him off.

"Jugular vein, collarbone, kidney, and heart," I finished. "we get it, we're wide open, attack us already dip shit."

"Now, which vital organ do you want to be struck at?" He asked, apparently ignoring my intrusion.

"Well if you're giving me a choice." I scoffed. "Jugular please, nice clean cut also, reduces the chances of my becoming a zombie. Plus we simply can't have you screwing up and leaving me paralyzed now can we?"

"Shut up!" I blinked.

"Well don't ask if you don't expect and answer, stupid ass." I mumbled.

"Yukari." Kakashi groaned.

"Well there you are, and here I thought you'd vanished."

"I don't suppose you'll listen if I tell you to cut it out?" He sighed. I smiled widely at him doing my utmost best to ignore his immensely huge chakra power up.

"Cut what out Sensei? I thought Zabuza was going to be the one cutting?" I replied sweetly. Of course who to ruin my fun but the little Uchiha? My eyes widened as he shook, his breathing still quiet though coming out in silent gasps as he pointed the tip of his kunai instead at himself.

"Sasuke! Don't worry. I'll protect the four of you with my life," Kakashi said. "I won't let anyone on my team die." I smiled softly, 'well look at this Maya, someone wants to protect me with their life… did you always feel this warmth when I was there?'

"I would be so sure." Came Zakuza's voice, he was… right behind us… "It's over!"

I instinctively twirled around slashing horizontally at where I'd swear his face was and as if in slow motion my eyes locked with Zabuzas as my blade… missed, sweeping to the right of his face only inches away. With my momentum it was a crucial mistake and I had to throw myself to the side in a weak attempt to avoid the attack I knew would follow. I blinked up from my position on the ground to find Zabuza with a Kunai in his back curiously of one Scarecrow sensei. Water poured from the wound… water? _'_clone.' I registered as Zabuza in turn appeared behind Kakashi.

"Sensei! Behind you!" Orangeman shouted in alarm only to prove too late. Before Kakashi had so much as turned around Zabuza cut him in half.

Surprise riddled Zabuzas face when Kakashi's body splashed into water, and then all too suddenly Zabuza himself found a kunai at his neck. "Don't move," Kakashi warned. "This is the end!"

"Wow!" Naruto breathed.

"You are too kind a man, Scarecrow, I'd have killed or knocked him out were I in your position." I admitted.

"There is no need for pointless death." Kakashi stated.

"You misunderstand, it is merely where we differ; I would not let the enemy even remotely have the chance of escape, for where you are positive he will not, I am not even willing to take the chance if it could mean my life or others." That comment had come out rather cold but it seemed to have amused Zabuza as the ninja began a throaty laugh.

"Is this the end?" Zabuza asked. "You really don't get it do you? You're technique is nothing but an imitation... I'll never be defeated by a copycat ninja like you," Zabuza said confidently. "But you're pretty good. I see you copied my water clone technique when you said, 'I won't let anyone on my team die.' By making your clone speak as if it was the real one, you diverted my attention to the clone... while the real one used the Mist Concealment technique to hide and observe my movements. However, you should have listened to the girl." He continued as ANOTHER Zabuza slowly appeared out of the mist behind Kakashi. "I'm not that easy to fool." The clone sloshed to water before our eyes and Naruto.

"That one's a fake, too!" Zabuza swung his giant blade again and Kakashi ducked smartly. Unfortunately he was no longer facing a bunch of ignorant kids trying to get bell or a pair of Chunin that did not live up to their reputation. Zabuza was the real deal, the Demon of the Mist.

He drove his zanbato into the ground and delivered a hard kick that threw Kakashi backwards. He retrieved his weapon with unnerving ease and took off after Kakashi. I blinked as he stopped. "Makibishi Spikes?" He murmured as though he found the very concept laughable, in fact so did I. 'Makinishi-who??? Is it a mushroom?' Frankly I didn't see anything, but hell to naw, who am I to judge? "How idiotic." He scoffed disappearing again with what would make a magicians head spin and Scarecrow fell backwards into the water.

"Sensei!" Kit screamed.

"His hand-to-hand combat skill is superb too." Sasuke commented. He had been rather silent through this whole thing but I managed to ignore him as Kakashi rose from the water. His spiked hair was somewhat flattened by the water ripping down his face.

/Fuck that, Kakashi's fucking hot!/

'He's like twice our age.'

/You know it's true, Bubbles-chan, Kakashi bringing Sexy back! Yeah!/

The word' idiot' was what drew me from my little, ehem, argument, followed by the term "Water Prison Jutsu!" My eyes widened for what felt like the thousandth time that day to watch in wrapped fascination as water sprung up around Kakashi, seemingly driven by the chakra in Zabuza's hand, to form a blue orb-like prison. "You fell for it." Zabuza chuckled. "This is a special prison that you can't escape from. You give me a hard time when you're moving." He paused, probably for effect. "I'll take care of you later, but first, I think I'll get rid of your little brats."

"Jerk off." I scoffed.

"Water clone jutsu!" At his command water rose and formed into his replica to do his dirty work as he insured Kakashi's imprisonment. "The three of you have forehead protectors on as if you think you're ninja. But ninja refers to someone who has gone through numerous life and death situations; in other words, you can call yourself a ninja when you appear in my bingo book." I felt a growl form in the back of my throat.

"You three aren't ninja." The clone snarled even as the mist thickened considerably.

'KIT!' I though as Naruto flew backward his forehead protector flying off on impact and landing on the ground where Zabuza mockingly stepped on it.

"Naruto!" Pinky shouted, and for once I was too damned angry to be pissed off at the pink menace, too damn angry at Zabuza to give her any of even my annoyance.

"You're just a bunch of kids." Zabuza finished.

"Listen! Get the bridge builder and run!" Kakashi frantically yelled. "You can't win this fight! He's using all of his power to keep me in this prison so he can only fight you with his water clone and the clone can not go far from the real body. So run!"

"Don't be daft." I laughed, but my tone had taken on a deeper note and my eyes flashed against my will. "Die now trying to rescue you, or die later trying to run. Let's face it both terms suck, but at least one isn't so cowerdus."

"We have to do it!" Sasuke affirmed sprinting towards him, shuriken in hand. With a painful effortlessness Zabuza deflected the attack but Sasuke wouldn't take no for an answer. Jumping into the air Sasuke literally tried to stab Zabuza. Zabuza made the attempt from Konaha's number one genin look like child's play as he grabbed the Ice Cube by his neck and threw him aside like a rage doll.

"Sasuke-kun!" Pinky screamed.

"He got Sasuke!" Orangeman Shouted.

"Uchiha!" I growled only barely registering the clone appearing in front of Naruto. _Click. _It was just like that, as though something had clicked in my brain and before I knew what the hell I was doing I was knocking Naruto to the side. "Don't touch him." I spat. The ground around me frosted eerily and I didn't care to think why.

"Giving orders now are you?" The clone laughed. "You know kid," He started walking closer to me, "you're gonna get yourself killed one day." He slashed at me and I rolled under the blade. If it was weapon play he wanted, it was weapon play he'd get. I phased next to him so I stood atop his sword, not unlike he'd done earlier.

"You wield it well for its size." I commented and he moved it in a complex way that made me flip behind him lest I fall. I darted forward again as he turned. "But it's slow." He grunted, dodging my crescent sweep.

"You can't kill me." He growled.

"I don't have to." I hissed. "You're just a clone!"Anger sprung from the depths of Zabuzas eyes and I suddenly registered Naruto's voice.

"ANGEL!" He cried, the brief distraction was enough, Zabuza already had me by the neck and lifted me into the air before I could shout back.

"Damn it." I swore my hands scraping at his.

"You." He said.

"Me." I choked back.

"You're going to get yourself killed." He repeated.

"Heh, fuck me gently with a chainsaw if I g-give a damn."

"Don't you care whether you live of die?" I winced as his hand held harder and I felt a rather distinctive twinge in my abdomen.

"Don't be stupid." I spat out. "If I'm not willing to put my life on the line then w-why the hell would I be in this occupation?" I continued, no longer caring that the air became colder with my every word or if I made him angry, in fact, I rather enjoyed making him angry.

"You're the one who said they'd off me right away, like it was the most natural thing in the word?" He squeezed. "I wonder if it was all talk."

Then I did probably the stupidest thing in the world, I started laughing. It was most likely responsible for the sudden splitting feeling in my stomach as the old wound reopened from strain. But I just couldn't help it, I had just realized, and whether it was triumphant laughter for finally figuring out or ironic laughter for my situation I neither knew, nor cared. "Hahahaha, I just remembered where I heard swastika before!" I claimed still laughing. His eyes widened in brief disbelieve. "It's the Nazi symbol right? Tell me I'm—" I choked on my last words as his grip increased.

"You're crazy kid, but I am this close to taking away your life, so be more careful when you're speaking it me!"

"HA!" I coughed out, hardly registering the blood that came with it, as my laughter died away. "I don't particularly c-care that you're the fucking D-Demon of the Mist, I don't particularly c-care that your some kickass c-criminal from the Seven Swordsman organization -which by the way sounds like a blood fairly tale name- f-fuck, I don't even particularly c-care how many goddamned hunter nin you must have had to avoid or even k-kill, just to get here. But know this you pompous mofo," I was whispering now both for effect and because even stuttering hurt my rasping breaths. It wasn't easy, you say pompous mofo in this situation without laughing! His eyes couldn't be more narrowed, I suppose I was spouting a lot of facts about him. "you so much as lay a finger on Kit, Ice Cube, Pinky, or hell even Scarecrow and there's no fucking way I'm gonna let you get away with it!." I growled out.

"Keh, you've probably never even killed someone." My expression turned grave as I stopped struggling altogether, managing to hide beneath a sheet of hair. My eyes, those eerily crimson orbs haunted with hidden shadow looked up at him for a moment, before I managed a Xelloss smile to cover it all up.

"Now, now," I started as I slipped my thumb slick with my own blood between his grip and my throat. "When you assume," I pressed hard on the palm turning the hand away in a position it did not want to go. "You make an Ass out to U and Me!" I winked falling backwards and landing, er, less then gracefully on my ass.

"ANGEL!" Naruto cried rushing towards the clone with a loud battle cry. Dumbfounded I watched as Naruto was kicked back but he got what he wanted. And clutched in his right hand was his once lost forehead protector.

"Hey you, the freak with no eye brows..." Kit said, good nickname. "Put this in your bingo book... the ninja who will become Hokage of the Hidden Village of Konoha one day..." Naruto stood up straight and put on his head band. "He never backs down and his name is... Uzamaki Naruto!" I smiled massaging my neck and the bruise I knew would form. "Sasuke, lend me your ear for a sec!" Sasuke? When did he get here? They both just watched me hang limp in Zabuza's grasp!?! Some teammates they are!

"What do you want?" The Ice Cube replied.

"I have a plan!"

"I can't believe you want to work as a team." Sasuke said.

"Heh, well lookie there, Ice Cube, you've been out numbered." I grinned though even doing that seemed suddenly arduous.

"Alright guys, let's go wild!" Kit shouted.

'And what's Sakura been doing all this time!?!?'

/crying out peoples names uselessly/ inner me growled.

"Angel, stay and protect the bridge builder." I twitched a disbelieving frown marring my features.

"Kit—" I started, ready to deliver a nice long and satisfying speech that started by telling him there was no way I was gonna back down, then gradually into a persuasions that told him they needed me -when I knew perfectly well they didn't- and finally ended by telling him he had no right to tell me what to do and if he tried it again I'd castrate him. However, as lovely as that speech would have been Naruto had other plans. Pity.

"I don't want you to get hurt." I blinked at the confession, all anger dissipating in the one sentence, and I heaved a defeated sigh as though deflating.

"Alright… I'll stay, but don't get into the habit of ordering me around Orangeman, or my foot will say hello to your ass!" He gave a rather nervous laugh and I worked my way over to Sakura and Tazuna.

"What's going on?" Sakura asked in a hushed voice.

"Thud and Thwack got a plan and now they're gonna free Kakashi." I said casually sticking both hands into their respective pockets.

"W-what!?"

"I said, Thud and Thwa—"

"I heard you the first time!" She snapped. I shrugged.

"Then why did you ask?"

"Never mind that, you're going to let them do it alone!?" I twitched feeling a reprimand coming and fingered the object in my pocket. "They'll never," Her mouth wide open it was easy for me to pop the jolly rancher inside. That shut her up. Ha-ha.

'Now be quiet like a good dog.'

/You mean bitch right?/

"Honestly Pinky have a little faith." I said with closed eyes and a Xelloss smile.

"Okay, ready? Let's take this guy down!" Naruto said wiping off the blood running down his chin.

"Big words for such a little man!" Zabuza the clone laughed. "You really think you have a chance at victory?"

"Big words coming from a guy with such a little penis." The entire clearing silenced and all eyes turned to me. "What?" Sakura anime fell. "Orangeman close your mouth, something's gonna fly in." I commented.

"I can't believe you just said that…" Naruto gaped.

"What, the close you're mouth thing?"

"N-no not that!" He squeaked.

"Oh! The manhood insult. Well just look at the guys sword, it's obvious he's got such a huge weapon because he's self conscious!" I'm smart aren't I? … Wow that's an interesting color!

"Wow Kit, you're fuchsia!" My eyes practically bugged out of my head.

"What are you all doing!??' Kakashi shouted. I couldn't escape the pout; I was having fun too… "I told you to run away! The outcome of this battle was decided when I got caught! Our mission was to protect the bridge builder. Did you forget that?"

"Old man..." Naruto whispered facing us and apparently back to normal.

"Don't worry, I caused all of this in the first place," Tazuna said. "I won't say that I want to survive no matter what. Sorry, everyone. Fight as much as you want." Huh? When did Sakura get up???

"That's how it is," Ice Cube said shrugging and I found myself holding a crooked smile. So the old man got some manners. How come Tanner couldn't adopt manners when he was scared to hell and back?

"Are you ready?" Naruto asked.

"You sure don't learn, do you?" Zabuza laughed. "Still pretending to be ninja? When I was your age, my hands were already soaked in blood." He stated far too proudly.

"The Demon Zabuza," Kakashi said.

"Oh, I see you've heard of me," Zabuza the real one said.

"A long time ago, the hidden Village of the Mist was known as the Village of the bloody Mist..." Kakashi began. "In that village, there was an obstacle that existed to become a ninja."

"So you also know about the final test there." It wasn't a question.

"The final test?" Naruto asked. "Hey, what is that 'final test'?" Zabuza was… laughing. That's cold man.

"Students killing each other," Zabuza explained reminiscently. "Friends who have eaten from the same pot are separated into groups of two and forced to fight each other... until one of them is killed. This is done with friend that have helped each other, shared their dreams, and competed together."

"Tch, no wonder you're so fucked up." I stated, had this been new to me I'd be shocked too. But frankly after all those reruns I sorta just wanted him to stop talking! "You think that's an excuse for what you did? Fuck that. They had to go through a reformation and everything." I ranted not noticing the stares I was drawing.

"Ten years ago, the Hidden Village of Mist had to go through a reformation," Kakashi explained. "because in the previous year, a monster appeared that finally decided it. A small boy who had not even gained the right to become a ninja... Killed more than 100 of the candidates that year, and killed them all without hesitation."

"That was fun!" Zabuza said with a dreamy sigh, like… like one of Sasuke's fan girls! Good simile ne?

His next move was fast and sent Sasuke flying backwards. He elbowed the still shocked boy in the stomach and blood flew from Sasuke's mouth in reaction. Zabuza's foot ground down on the Ice Cube's stomached drawing pained cries from the remarkably helpless boy. The bitch in me wanted to marvel at the irony and my more human side was suddenly much more tense.

"Sasuke-kun!" Sakura cried almost choking on her jolly rancher. Oh dear, that can be hazardous can't it?

"Die!" Zabuza said crushing is foot down.

"Damn!" Naruto yelled. "SHADOW CLONE JUTSU!"

Dozens of kunai wielding Naruto's appeared to surround Zabuza who gripped the hilt of his weapon. With his attention diverted Sasuke took his chance to escape and Naruto's covered Zabuza only seconds later. The Narutos were sent flying, each crying out in displeasure as some popped.

"His skills are too advanced! There's no way they could win!" Tazuna said.

"Shut up." I said rather impassively. "And just… watch."

Meanwhile the real Naruto threw something at Sasuke who of course caught it. A smirking Sasuke turned around to reveal a large weapon with four curved blades, somewhat like a giant shuriken, held by a whole in its center. "Demon Wind Shuriken!" Ice Cube said, see giant shuriken! "Windmill of Shadows!"

"A shuriken won't work on me," Zabuza mocked.

Sasuke easily tossed the comment aside, leaping into the air and hurling the Demon Wind Shuriken towards the real Zabuza… who caught it. Now I'm no expert but that can't be easy.

/Are you complimenting the enemy/

'I give the comments where they're due, no matter the person.'

However what Zabuza didn't see was the second giant shuriken in the first's shadow. It was brilliant really, he couldn't possibly catch that. I twitched. But apparently jumping over it is not impossible… 'Don't count your chickens yet Zabuza' I though as the dodged shuriken suddenly poofed into Naruto who threw a kunai. Scratch that earlier comment, THIS plan was brilliant!

"This is the spot!" Naruto shouted. To escape, Zabuza, let go of the orb and the jutsu surrounding Kakashi dissipated.

"I'll destroy you!" Zabuza hissed chucking the caught shuriken at him. I rather like the term chucking don't you, it has a certain ungracefullness about it that shouldn't be used in reference to shonobi who know only grace.

Kakashi stopped the spinning of the shuriken with his fist blood dripping down his finger as Naruto plunged into the water. "Naruto, your plan was impressive." Kakashi complimented. "You have all sure grown." Naruto laughed grinning sheepishly.

"I used the shadow replication technique to hide the fact that I transformed into the Demon Wind Shuriken. I didn't do it to defeat Zabuza." Naruto explained. "I left one of my clones, and I transformed into the giant shuriken. Then my clone threw me, now a shuriken, to Sasuke. Sasuke knew that it was me right after he caught it. Then he took out his own shuriken and used the shadow shuriken technique. I hid in the shadow of the real shuriken and went straight for Zabuza. I knew that I couldn't beat Zabuza just by that, of course. But I thought that if I could just break the water prison, maybe things would turn around... We were able to get rid of that water clone, so it was a success!"

"It was just luck." Sasuke mumbled, boy's just upset he didn't come up with it!

"It was luck?!" Tazuna yelled.

"Heh. I just got distracted and released the jutsu." Zabuza bragged I twitched, oh there was no fucking way this guy was fo real. I wasn't gonna let him take away my Kit's glory… and I guess Popsicles too. Ha-ha

"Ha! Don't flatter yourself! Now I'm not a nice person but I recognize brilliance when I see it. They forced you to release that jutsu and you know it! If you can't admit that fact gracefully then you lack the honor of a shonobi, for there is no honor in lies." I bit out.

"What was that girl?" Zabuza growled.

"I believe that's what they call an insult." Scarecrow answered for me. "I'd also like to tell you that... I don't fall for the same jutsu twice," Kakashi said. "So what are you going to do now?"

"Don't let your guard down!" Sasuke shouted joining Sakura and me in front of the bridge builder. Zabuza and Kakashi leapt back in opposite directions. Zabuza set off on a huge rand of hand seals. And Kakashi… holy crap! Kakashi was coping each and ever one so fast I don't think there was even a time difference!

"Water Style: Water Dragon jutsu!" Neat stereo. Two pillars of water erupted from the lake forming into the writhing form of dragons. They intertwined magnificently, I just couldn't close my eyes.

"Beautiful." I whispered as they canceled each other out. Kakashi and Zabuza dead locked with their weapons and considering the weapon size different ya gotten give kudos to Scarecrow for holding up. They sprang apart, Zabuza running left in a full circle, Kakashi mirroring his actions. When Zabuza stopped Kakashi stopped at the same time, and when Zabuza put his hand in the air Kakashi synchronized his movements once more. They were like dancers, the ones who practiced to make their moved exactly the same.

"He's moving just like him!" Tazuna breathed in awe. "And with such perfect timing!"

"His mastery is amazing." I replied. "The Scarecrow has adapted so well to his Sharingan, he's reading Zabuzas mind." I snickered. Tazuna seemed to believe and get this, so did Sakura. Ha-ha. Sasuke on the other hand, the little party pooper rolled his eyes.

"What you're doing is just copying. Nothing special," Zabuza said doing another hand sign. "You can't beat me you monkey!" Zabuza and Kakashi said in unison. Looks like Kakashi and I have similarly cruel minds. "I'll make it so that you'll never open that copycat mouth of yours again!" Zabuza shouted but then stopped suddenly with the face of a man who'd seen his dead wife, well maybe not wife but you get it right?

"Water Style: Giant Vortex Jutsu!" Kakashi finished. Zabuza's eyes practically popped out of his head as the water rose and flooded over him sending him reeling backwards before pinning him to a tree, with help from a few of Scarecrow's kunai of course. The Scarecrow himself was up in the trees branches looking down at his fallen foe.

"Can you... see into... the f-future?" Zabuza ground out in… was that fear I heard in his voice?

"Yes... this is your last battle… ever." Kakashi answered cryptically.

Then quiet suddenly, Zabuza shuddered, fell, and then, went limp. I didn't see anything, not even the needles I knew had punctured him.

"You are right. This was his last battle." Came a voice. Our eyes collectively traveled to another tree, where a figure stood. He was young, or so I knew, adorned in green robes that supplied well movement. Even from this distance I could see a dulled purple nail polish, so well done if freaked me out. How the hell do you keep it from chipping? But a mask covered what I remember to have been remarkably feminine features, and upon its white brow four wavy engravings, the mask of a hunter-nin of the mist.

Kakashi jumped down from the tree to check Zabuza for a pulse, finding it absent is gaze turned next on the boy. The boy bowed in respect or thanks I knew not which for sure. "Thank you very much. I was looking for a chance to kill Zabuza," he explained.

"That mask... If I remember correctly, you must be a hunter-nin from the hidden Village of the Mist," Kakashi examined.

"You are very well informed." The hunter-nin complimented.

"A hunter-nin?" Orangeman growled hackles raising. I rolled my eyes.

"Naruto, do you even know what that is?" Sakura asked bopping him over the head. He mumbled a 'no.' "Well if you didn't skip class so often—"

"A hunter-nins job is to conceal the secrets of their villages. They hunt down, assassinate, and dispose of, missing-nin form their own village. This in turn prevents outsiders from extracting any important secrets from the bodies." I spoke to quiet the argument. I won't have us looking like idiots in front of someone as strong as Haku, or at least my pride wouldn't more likely. "Nice hit by the way… your precision is astounding." I clenched my hands in their pockets as his eyes traveled over me.

/Get rid of him now, while you can, before the real fight!/

'no… Kit needs this next battle. They all do. I must be careful on how much of the future I change…'

/party pooper/

"Yes, I am a member of the pursuing ninja unit that hunt exiled ninja." Haku finally affirmed. Orangeman darted up to the hunter-nin's tree.

"Who the hell are you?" He growled angrily.

"Calm down, Naruto. He's not an enemy," Scarecrow soothed.

"That's not what I'm asking! But... Zabuza was killed!" Naruto said his face pained at the mere thought of it. "He- he was so strong, but he was killed so easily by a kid that's not that different from me! We... We look like idiots! I... I can't except this!" my gaze half-lidded in memory. For this situation was so alike the other, these words were so uncannily close. The words I now heard from Naruto, the same ones that had convinced me to teach Tanner that day.

"Well, I know how you feel, but this is also the truth. In our world there are kids younger than you, but stronger than me." I heard Kakashi say.

I blinked, I swear to bob that's all I did, and then quite suddenly Haku was by Zabuza's limp form. "Your battle is over. Now I must dispose of this corpse because it seems to be a body of many secrets. Now it you'll excuse me," And he disappeared in a swirl of leaves, it looked rather classy. When I disappear I'm just gone, 'maybe I should up my performance as well.' I thought.

"Things like this happen in the life of a ninja." Scarecrow continued. "If you don't like it, make it up next time." Funny, that wasn't how I cheered Tanner up. I watched Naruto through his words. He shook uncontrollably with what I'd guess to be frustration, his hands raw from pounding into the ground and what I had deciphered to be tears of anger just held back.

'That didn't calm him down at all'

/Well you could always use your methods on Kit./

'That would involve beating the shit out of him'

/awe, you're going soft, how sweet./

'Piss off.' I thought rolling my eyes and suddenly discovering this to be a very bad idea. Balance was nearly snatched from me in those few moments I fought to keep it, and bright white lights popped to obscure my vision as pain exploded in my abdomen.

"Our mission hasn't ended yet," I heard Kakashi continue though it was like listening from afar. "We need to take the bridge builder to his house."

"Sorry about that, everyone!" Someone was laughing, at least I think they were. "Just rest at my house!"

"All right, let's cheer up and go!" That was Scarecrow right. I tried to focus I really did.

"Kakashi-sensei!" I heard people call through the rushing water in my ears, or perhaps it was blood. Yes that would make much more sense. I brought my hand up to my face subconsciously touching it to my stomach before hand to view a rather slick substance. An odd sense of fascination appeared in me as red entered my world, swirling in a dance of white, like candy cane mints.

_On the good ship lollipop _

"Yukari-chan?" The voice was faint and I didn't recognize it as I swayed with half-lidded eyes in my spot.

_It's a night trip into bed you hop_

"Yukari!" There it was again, but who was that? They stopped my lollypop song… "Oh my god, Yukari, how long have you been losing blood!?" My eyes snapped open at this and my vision cleared to see… PINKY! Wow. Balance was becoming an issue and I fought to keep my footing.

"Yukari-chan, are you alright!?"

'no' I thought.

"I'm fine" I said through teeth gritted to the point where I'd swear my jaw was gonna crack.

"How much blood have you lost? Are you gonna be okay. I didn't even notice. When did it happen? Was it Zabuza?" I know she's just concerned but,

"Shut up!" I shouted. Pain shot through my stomach and I bent over clutching it and staggering to keep my balance. "Talking, bad bad bad bad idea." I gasped shaking my head.

"Then stop." I recognized Ice Cubes voice right behind me. It was a mark of how very bad the situation really was that I was mulling over how incredibly deep and nice to listen to the young Uchiha's voice was.

No, not now. Why was this happening now!? Was I so weak that these old wounds would slow me down? Was I so pathetic that I couldn't even fight a little battle without hurting myself!? I couldn't believe I was slowing them down! I shouldn't have needed help! No, I just couldn't black out now! But even as I ranted my balance was failing dismally. That man shouldn't have been able to hurt me now, not since I had killed him myself. Damn him! Damn the man who killed my sister, damn the man who spilled my blood, damn my father to hell.

Sakura was talking but my vision was going black. I mumbled words like 'pathetic,' 'weak,' and 'Useless,' not caring if they were heard as I lost the battle of balance. Followed by an impressive string of swear words even as I fell. I was too out of it to notice or care that I had been caught. The rushing in my ears was defining now. I must have been so pale. I couldn't see. It felt like a vice was gripping at my lungs and tears pricked the corners of my eyes, ones I was not foolish enough to hope would fall. And finally falling into darkness, came words etched with such venom, "How I hate that man…"

A/N: So ends Chapter 7. Does anyone else think Yukari doesn't like Zabuza? Why aren't Yukari's wounds healing?! Will this prove dangerous for the upcoming battle? Fuck ya it will. Why? Because I'm mean. Ha-ha. I should consider giving her a break sometime ne? But she's already got a head start! She knows what's going to happen! Useful yes? I think so. Any-la-who, next chapter funny, trouble, training, questions, uncomfortableness, the works! So stay tuned and read it! By the way does anyone know who the song under the title of this chapie is by. I heard it in some store and have been wondering ever since. Ha-ha. Oh ya and PLEASE REVIEW! 


	9. Pieces Of A Shattered Past

**A/N: **Oh my god, it's been forever. I'm so sorry. The moving and the school, and the writers block. But there's no excuse for my evil lateness. I'm so sorry! This chapter some things come to light and then there's more confusion. Finally the tree climbing. A couple new characters. Tazuna is aggravating. Sasuke's being tortured, it's fun. But in the long run I'm still really sorry. I love you all! Please Enjoy!

Disclaimer: me no own, me promise.

**Chapter 8**

**Pieces Of A Shattered Past**

**(Suck it up, and move on)**

_The true beauty of darkness is that it forever remains eternal. It is inevitable, it will occur. Nothing lasts forever perhaps except maybe the darkness. It is the before and the after light. Raining in its own lands till the time comes where the end arrives and darkens what it had so long been denied. In the simplest things like the dyeing of a candle these facts can be seen to have taken root. But darkness is conniving, patient in its way that it seizes the opportune moment to be there the very instant the light has vanished from our world. This can be difficult to understand as we as humans cannot fathom what there would be when light vanished had there not been darkness. There would be nothingness, a term in itself that is neither logical nor correct when defined in human form._

_Where there is either darkness or light there can never be' nothing.' The human mind sometimes looks past the shadows and claims there is nothing, should they have said there is nothing but darkness would that be considered correct? I cannot imagine nor could any human I suppose. Our minds weren't built that way, we do not function in a fashion that allows us to picture a world with nothing, when there can always be darkness. The common mistake of darkness for nothing opened farther corners of our mind. The moment the word itself was created 'nothing' had no purpose but to linger in the shadow of darkness, the gap between dimensions, what we couldn't fathom or see, what we couldn't rely on or understand. _

_The common term 'I said nothing' remains a lie, everyone uses it and though it is in fact on some level wrong our minds register it as a proper response, for it could not be said any other way. When thought about, 'nothing' seems like a truly terrible place, thing, or being, for though it is a noun this is all we can decipher about it. _

_But this is just a rant, how strangely the wheels within my head turn in a state of unconsciousness. Oh yes, I knew I was not awake, I couldn't be. For there was only darkness, though I knew my eyes to be open; there was only darkness… though I knew there should be pain. I felt nothing. Neither cold, nor warm; no particular feeling of anything really, just a sense of knowing. It was odd, and for some reason it fascinated me. _

'_I wonder… oh my, it worked.' I could see my hand but I couldn't feel myself lifting it. It was the strangest sensation. I closed my fingers into a fist and back out, a couple times to get used to the numbness. Even now I realized how I contradicted my thoughts. Had there been nothing but darkness how the hell would I have been able to see my hand? It's like Einstein's theory of relativity, I don't seem to understand either one completely, though maybe this a bit more then that._

_I forced myself to try and walk and though I knew my feet to move, I neither felt it nor did they connect with solid ground. The thought fleetingly came to me that perhaps I was floating, but it was quickly dismissed. Something from my own conscious had worked my body into a sitting position. I had been lying down, or so it appeared. From there you can't possibly imagine how bizarre it is to walk and not feel it. I had control over my actions, my brain told my nerves what to move and how to move it. But it was damn hard to tell if it was working. _

_Ah yes ground, wonderful ground. 'So that brings my list up from, nothingness, to darkness, to darkness and some form of light, to darkness, some form of light and ground, to darkness, some form of light, ground, and probably gravity. See I sound like I have a lot of info already. Too bad I don't have fucking clue where I am.' I brought my hand to my chest. My heart was beating, I still lived. That was a good thing. But not only that but my chest rose and fell in a steady motion I had not been aware of. Of course now that I thought about it I really did have to breath, but that meant… oh yay, I get to add air to my list!_

"_Yukari?"_

_And sound, sound is going on the list too!_

"_Yuki?"_

"_Maya…"My voice sounded softer then usual, lighter, foreign to my own tongue. _

'_Yuki! It is you!" I felt, I actually felt something collide with me. Maya had always been shorter them me but was it really her. Where the numbness of my body had been instead fled to my brain. I knew it not to be real, but so wanted to believe otherwise. "Yuki I knew you'd come, you always come! But where is Papa?" I tensed at the very name. What was going on?_

"_He couldn't make it, he's really sorry though, but he couldn't get off work." The words were mine, though not my choice, yet the moment they left my lips I had a creepy version of da-ja-vu. _

"_Oh…" I felt my heart catch in my throat at the sight of her crestfallen blue eyes. She looked up at me wiping all sadness from her face and excepting my lie. "Oh well, at least you're here!" She cried. _

'_Yes Maya, I'm here! I'll always be here!' I though but my jaw wouldn't move. I had not felt myself bend down but the instant I noticed, I found myself staring at my Maya, 2 years in the past. The world around me flared to life in memory as I remembered. Grass took form beneath our feet and a large oak tree sprang up from the ground next to us, and as though a merige a building appeared behind us, one I recognized to be a school. And in that instant I was displaced, left to watch from my own body as my 11 year old self presented Maya with a badly wrapped package._

"_Sorry about that mess…" I apologized sheepishly. Oh yes, this I remembered._

"_Thank you Yuki! Can I open it now? Can I? Can I?" I smiled softly and though for a moment I thought I had regained movement I was wrong. My younger self had smiled too, I had smiled back then._

"_Of course you can." She shyly took the package from me, waited a moment, and then tore into it with and eagerness that sent a surge of happiness through me. I always felt happy around Maya, she made me happy, 'because, that's what angels do' I suppose. Haha. My body was shaking, I was… laughing, but it hurt. _

_Cold air hit me powerfully in the face, chilling my body like ice water and forcing my crimson eyes closed. A feeling of utter weightlessness overtook me and I became aware that I was no longer in my younger self's body. I was cold, so very cold, unnaturally. Had I been blown out of that body? So cold, Maya. No. I wanted to see more. I clenched my jaw and, desperate to see more, I reopened my eyes. The scene had vanished, as I had feared, Maya did not look back at me. I was in another place, another time._

My angel looked fallen, wounded, in pain. Poor little angel, she looked so cold. She had wrapped the blanket around her like a cocoon and still she was shivering. Kakashi said she'd be alright, just needed sleep to heal. I couldn't protect her. But… when had she needed protecting. I never saw Zabuza inflict those wounds but that didn't stop me from being royally pissed off. They looked so deep, there was so much blood. "I have to get stronger. How can I become Hokage if I can't even save my friends?"

A soft noise drew me out of my thoughts. It was Yukari, she was laughing. "Hey don't laugh at-" I started only to realize she was still sleeping.

"I'm here… I'll always be… here." I stared at her for a moment my cerulean eyes sweeping over her too pale face.

"You don't know that." I said quietly. "You say you'll stay but you don't know. They don't know… The demon that's inside me…" I gritted my teeth in pain and anger. It hurt so much to know they'd all leave if they knew. Yukari was amazing, nicer to me then most, judged fairly. I didn't want to believe that she'd leave, it seems like I'm dishonoring her to think she'd do it, but still… so many others already had, it was hard not to question. "How can I be so sure you'll stay when so many people left?" I said out loud knowing she was asleep.

"Because… that's what angels do…" My eyes widened and I blinked, she still slept but those words made me feel warm.

"Arigato."

_I was 10, walking and alone at that. It must have been summer for my attire was shorts and a tank top. I also had a rather nice tan. There was a strange sound in the air; I only placed it to be that of running water when my 10 year old self reached a bridge. Yes you guessed it, I still couldn't move. Even as I stopped I registered a feeling of annoyance, something was blocking the bridge, something or someone. _

"_Step aside." I ordered. It almost seemed laughable now that I had said it but at the time I think I had actually expected them to move. The annoyed feeling grew as only one of the men turned to answer me._

"_Go home girly." The man had a black goatee wanna-be and dark brown eyes. He towered over me now just as he had done then, for I was always rather lacking in height. _

"_To get there I must cross this bridge. I will ask you again, step aside." He let loose a bark of laughter. "Stupid teenagers." I grumbled, truly they couldn't have been that old. 13 maybe 14, tops. "What the fuck are you guys doing anyway?" _

"_Little ladies shouldn't swear." Another said turning to reveal brown cropped hair and smooth features contorted in a sickening grin. The last man was also visible now. A cut ran from his jaw to his cheek bone fresh with blood. He had a hard face with cold blue eyes and badly cut black hair. _

_Even now the fourth person that lay between them made me feel sickened. A girl badly bruised with dirty lavender hair. Pink eyes looked up at me pleadingly. I don't know why I had done it. They were in my way I had reasoned. It had nothing to do with the girl a year my junior. But either way I attacked. _

She looked like she was sleeping. Like if I just reached over and prodded her she'd wake and punch me in the face like she did Naruto. But she hadn't woken up yet and it made me feel uneasy. How could Zabuza have given her those marks, he must have really ment to kill her. And how close she came to actually dying, it was unnerving to say the least.

I brushed hair from my emerald eyes and carefully sat on the bed. It was nightfall and we were all exhausted. Even Naruto who apparently didn't have that endless supply of energy I had taken it for. But then I guess lugging Kakashi back with only my help hadn't helped the matter much.

I don't believe Yukari likes me, she doesn't hate me though, so I guess that's a start. I figure she tried to help me with Sasuke so she can't be all that bad right?

I nodded once, strangely determined and clicked the lights off lying down happily.

…

"I wonder what Sasuke-kun is doing right now…" I whispered going red in the face when I pictured him sleeping in boxers. WHAM!! And the last thing I was able to register was that Yukari's fist had connected with my face…

_A blast of cold air hit me again and shivers ran up my spine in reaction. Again my eyes reopened and again they were met with a different scene.__Damn, I wanted to watch that too…_

"_Here, I'll grow out of it eventually so I mine as well just let you have it." I blinked looking at 8 year old Tanner. His dark blue hair was not as grown out as it was now but it still fell lightly over his royal blue eyes. The boy wrapped my 9 year old self in a long black jacket. He was the same height as me and the coat was far too big but I had blinked back at him completely stunned. I watched myself tackle him to the ground in a hug._

"_Thank you."I had whispered upon pulling away, feeling warmer in the falling rain that surrounded me then I ever thought possible. I saw his surprise and almost laughed. _

"_Yeah well…" He shifted averting his eyes. The younger me really did laugh at this. "Happybirthdayyukari." I again blinked at him while I stood, only this time in confusion. He had sighed and ruffled his hair a little in an uncomfortable fashion. "Happy Birthday Kari." I had been too surprised to notice the absence of the suffix 'sensei.' He turned shoving his hands back into his pockets and began to walk away. "See ya for training tomorrow then!" _

_I smiled softly and, anticipating the burst of air, closed my eyes in preparation. I was not to be disappointed. The blast came and went though I was given the distinct impression that it was becoming more powerful. The scene this time took no time to remember. _

Regulating my breathing I let my eyes scan the room for any sign of danger. However despite what I'd heard only moments ago Sakura and Yukari were sleeping quite peacefully, Yukari was even smirking and Sakura was… bleeding from the head. I didn't have to come from a genius clan to know what had happened. Now either Yukari was really good at faking sleep, or she 'accidentally' knocked Sakura out…

'Either way it doesn't matter.' I figured indifferently. I turned to walk back out when movement caught my attention. My eyes found Yukari shifting position, she was shivering. 'Strange,' I thought. She had been amazingly warm when I carried her back. I shook my head, for some reason that thought bothered me.

"T-Tanner." I narrowed my eyes my shoulders tensing at the familiar name. She had used the same name in casual conversation with me while trying to make me eat and again when she'd broken Naruto's nose. Unlike most other names I'd heard from her this didn't seem to be a nickname.

She gave a particularly violent shudder. "I-I'm c-cold." She whimpered. Her words surprised me as well as the tone they made her seem very vulnerable, weak, and those words are strange in reference to her. Unlike the others, I prided myself on not being daft. I knew those wounds had not originated from Zabuza, it was too much of a coincidence from the fight I witnessed only a month prior. I knew she didn't trust us, she never relaxed in our presence, I also knew she had something to hide. Yes I was still on about that, but I know I'm right, she's not… normal.

I glanced around again already knowing I was alone yet still very unsure of what the hell I was doing. 'She looks cold,' I reasoned, 'there's was a blanket on that chair.' It made perfect sense to me, 'It's a, uhh, teammately thing to do.' I thought lightly draping the blanket over her. I grimaced in realization, having Yukari around was doing a number on my vocabulary. Her hand darted out when I made the mistake of coming into reach and for the second time in 10 minutes adrenaline pounded in my blood. I had been caught. No… her grip loosened but she was defiantly still asleep. 'Yukari Irenara,' I smirked, drawing my hand back though commending silently her reflexes.

"Thank you…" My eyes widened slightly, a frown marred my face and for the first time since I'd met her, I realized, Yukari Irenara, was totally relaxed. Yes this girl with the Sharingan eyes was far from normal. What exactly she was, however, I couldn't say for sure.

_I was 7, the sun was far too bright, the air was far too cold, and I was dressed in black. The dress that came down to my knees was lined with lace and would normally have warranted a comment from the boy at my side. But even Tanner would not have dared jibe a remark at this time. Tears had leaked from my eyes, silently sliding down my very pale cheeks. Not a sob or a whimper had left my throat. I had forgotten how short my hair had been at that age. It was just above my shoulders and unbound. In front of me my hands felt the tremors from the small 5 year old, whose shoulders I held for comfort. She tried to stifle her tears with her hands but her cries, instead of subsiding, seemed to become worse. My father stood on my left, the impassive bastard. He didn't look the least bit sad at the passing of his wife. Damn him._

"_Amen" the pastor finished._

_The banquet on her casket was quite beautiful and I watched as my past self left Maya in Tanners care, trusting him for the moment, and wandered to the coffin. It was open only because the snow fall had stopped and I had peered rather level into the face of my dead mother. She had looked different then I had remembered. Paler but wearing lipstick. My mother, I knew, had never worn lipstick. So this was her face. She had golden hair, short and cut in a boyish fashion and she was wearing earnings, hoops more precisely. She looked dead. I hadn't seen a peaceful expression, no, none of that crap they say about the dead. She looked dead, stiff as board and probably stuffed with hundreds of cosmetics. It's a miracle they were able to reconstruct her face at all after that fire. I joined my younger self though unlike then I remembered this face, every detail. My 7 year old self had composed my face, desperately wiping away the tears in favor of a more solid expression. To be strong for Maya, Maya could not see me cry, not now._

"_Come on Maya." I had said working my way back to her. That tiny girl in pigtails had peered up at me tearfully and left the sad looking boy in favor of crying into my dress. "We're leaving."_

_I bowed my head as the winds once again pushed at me. Yes they were getting stronger._

"_Nii-san!" I my eyes shot open again, startled by the cry and disbelief marring my features. 6 years old and I was running towards this place. My head shot up and a small gasp escaped my lips. My brother. _

_Shura Irenara shared my hair color and Mayas eyes. Always 4 years my senior, my heart stopped at the sight of him. Just as I remembered his hair stuck up, something I had made a habit of pointing out as a child. His expression panicked eyes wide as though realizing a sudden mistake. These things were obvious to me now but at that time …_

"_Nii-san!" I laughed finally stopping in front of him. "Nii-san, are we going back?" His face took on a pained look as he knelt to my size. _

"_Yukari, not this time…" His voice was deep, smooth and sorry. _

"_Shura? Is everything alright?" I had asked concerned by his tone and actions. _

"_Don't worry, everything's fine." Even then I had known. Even then I had seen his lie. _

"_Nii-san… where… where are you going?" I had asked wording the question carefully and casting a glance at his duffle bag._

"_I'm going back."_

"_But I thought—"_

"_I'm going back alone." A silence spread between us as tears came to my eyes. I threw myself at him in a dead hug. I had heard the true words of that sentence. 'I am going, and I am never coming back.'_

"_I-I won't let you! Y-you c-can't leave. What will happen t-to Maya if y-you leave? D-did you ever th-think about that!?" I had sobbed burying my face in his neck, even as he wrapped his arms around my younger form in return. _

"_Yukari," He sighed. "I must go." He said softly._

"_Th-then take me with you! Brother! Don't leave me! Please let me come too!"_

"_No." His sternness had caught me off guard and my sobbing was put to a stop. He had held me a little away from him though my eyes had been tightly shut. "Yukari! Look at me!" He demanded. I had whimpered but crimson met blue as our eyes clashed. "You must stay here."_

"_But nii-san I—"_

"_No Yukari. You must stay and take care of your sister. If you come with me you'll be leaving her all alone. Is that what you want Yukari?" My 6 year old self shook my head frantically. "Good" he breathed his hand withdrew and dug into his belt unclipping a small sheathed weapon. "Here" My little eyes had widened in awe as I took Winter's Frost from him. _

"_But, Shura, this is yours." I had said._

"_And now it is yours, Yukari. Besides, you've practically mastered it by now. Keep it with you and protect your sister. Where I'm going is too dangerous, please," I was amazed even now as his voice cracked and he pulled me into a hug. "promise you'll live, and take care of yourself!" He choked. _

"_Shura…" I had wanted to ask, to demand answers. Why was he leaving me? But I, I just couldn't do it. "Of course, I promise." Oh god the tears where back. He pulled away smiling lovingly._

"_You mustn't tell a soul where I've gone. Okay Yukari?" he continued as he stood. An ominous wind had blown at my hair and my eyes had widened. Wait no. Not yet. It was happening too fast. _

"_Wait brother!" I reached out but he had already started to run._

"_Goodbye Yukari I love you..."_

"_Nii-san! No!" I had staggered after him through feet of snow, trying and failing to catch up. Tears clouded my vision and winter cold nipped at my skin. "Shura! Shura! No! Comeback Shura! Shura!" _

_I felt my heart constrict. "SHURA!"_

_------------------------------------------------- ----------------------------------------------------------_

"SHURA!" I cried sitting up. I was back. In a house, on a bed. It was quiet, just a dream.

I staggered out of the soft comfort of the bed. My hands catching a table and knocking something distinctly glass off of it in my haste. There was pain in my stomach and my shoulder, every muscle screamed as I made my way out the door, more then happy that I was alone. I had forgotten, I realized as I trudged. I had told the lie--that I didn't know what happened to him--so many times that I had come to believe it. Perhaps I had even forced myself to forget, as I was still uncertain of where exactly he had gone.

"Damn him." I growled, on the verge of tears as I stopped at the edge of the river. More cold air hit me, but I would not close my eyes. I refused to chance reopening them and finding myself back when my brother had gone. There was a dock to my right, it was late, and day light had long gone. "Are you happy now?!" I shouted falling to my hands and knees and gripping the grass fiercely. "I did it! I lived! I hope you're fucking happy now!" I screamed at the waters, my voice cracking at the tone. "Where are you Shura…? What the hell are you now?!" Pain shot up my arms and I collapsed unable to hold my own weight as tremors wracked my body. Red flashed before my eyes as I flipped to my side. "He hurt me, and she's dead. Him too, I killed him. My fault… all my fault… Where are you Shura…? Where are you when I have nothing left to loose? Will you take me with you now? Where are you…?"

Silence enveloped me leaving only the waves as they hit the shore. Had the skies not been so clear I'd have expected rain. It tends to rain when I want it least. I had not heard the sounds of someone approaching, I'm not entirely sure I'd be able to move even if I had. But quiet suddenly I was looking at the bottom of a crutch.

"Hello Mister Crutch." I said quietly. "And what are you doing up at this time of night?"

"I could ask you the same." Kakashi's lazy voice answered back at me.

"I wasn't talking to you. I was talking to Mister Crutch." I said. "Zabuza is still alive." It wasn't a question.

"Yes." He didn't ask me how I knew.

"How ya feeling?" I managed, needing to say something.

"Mister Crutch, or Me?" I didn't bother answering. "I'll heal." He said finally. "And how are you feeling Yukari?"

"A little soar here and there. My stomach and my shoulder are annoying and my muscles hate me, but otherwise, perfectly peachy." The words had come out more bitter then I had anticipated but I let it slide. My heart was fit to burst and how I wished it would stop that annoying throbbing against my chest, it seemed to be the cause of all my pain. I had every fucking right to be bitter.

"That's not what I ment." He continued. I stiffened.

"Is this the part in the story where you tell me it's all gonna be okay?" My voice was incredibly horse and my eyes stung with unshed tears. But the last thing I wanted was his sympathy, his pity, the expressions given to those measured as weak. "Cuz if it is let's skip that part, I'm no fan of mushiness." I didn't even move from my side focusing my eyes on my hand instead of Kakashi's crutch.

"Neither am I." I blinked at the sentence, slightly taken aback. I suppose that was true. He turned and began to slowly limp away.

I was glad. I know I probably shouldn't try to stand and it's odd that he left me but still, I'm glad to be alone again... alone with no one to judge me at my weakest. Yes, my weakest, the build up after all the pain. It happened on rare occasions and never in public. When Maya died I was acting on autopilot. Eat, sleep, re-live the event, over and over and over. I had eaten less. True, I could barely stomach the food. I had avoided speaking. True, the words were always dead. I had hardly slept. Also true, the nightmares where always unbearable. But I was still acting, moving, and though it hurt to admit it ignoring. I was ignoring even now. 'Damn it. I'm so weak!' My eyes stung with fresh waters and the burning in the pit of my stomach rose to accost my throat.

I never heard Kakashi stop, indeed it was something in itself that I'd heard him speak. "I am, however, going to tell you to suck it up and move on." My eyes widened in surprise as he disappeared. And moments later my throat convulsed in what was, though barely audible, an unmistakable laugh. Surely I was insane.

"Suck it up and move on huh?" I shifted, flipping over to my back. "Well, it wasn't mushy…"

My last family member, my brother, and I was here in this Naruto World. I would never see him again. How had I ever hoped I would? It seemed perfectly clear to me that he was never coming back. But still I had just begun to realize how much hope hurt. "Hope." I spat the word as though it were diseased. I had never been a big fan in the first place. Hope sure as hell didn't give a fuck about me. Hope didn't save Maya. Hope wasn't going to bring my brother back!

There is a difference between believing and hoping. They are as commonly mistaken for the other as darkness for nothingness. Believing: there is a likely hood it will happen, you can look at a person and say I believe he'll get there, because he's trying to get there, and so on. Hoping: a crippling feeling that likes to fuck with me apparently. Sure it works for some people. That, sitting there, 'I hope someone will come and save me,' attitude. That shit don't work for me. It's just a bigger let down if no one comes. A harder blow. And Shura, he wasn't coming back, I didn't know where he was, if he was still alive and even if he was, he was a good as dead to me now.

"You're dead." The moment the words left my mouth I was certain it was true. The tension around my heart seemed to ease though the ache stayed ever present, the hope left me. Even if he still lived he had become someone I no longer knew. And indeed it made me wonder if I even wanted to follow him anymore. I had Tanner, I had Kanoke, Kit, Hinata, my team; I believed they would always be there and they were good enough for me. And it felt good to be certain again.

With a small nod and help from a tree, I forced myself to my feet. "Well damn, aren't I just the pathetic little weakling?" I laughed choking on my almost tears, why wouldn't the damn things just fall already? "Goodbye Shura." The words were surprisingly easy for me to say as I began a frigid sort of walk- that I now prayed to god would be better by tomorrow- back to the house. I smiled slightly lost in thought. A great deal of tension had left my muscles. My walking was almost normal in fact. "I wonder how long I've been out." I thought wearily opening the doors to what I knew to be Tazuna's house.

I slipped into the room Sakura and I were sharing, though I may as well have been as loud as usual. Honestly the girl slept like a log, and when I say log I mean like… holy fuck. I know that doesn't make sense but I feel I should really stress this. It's quite fascinating. I mean come on she didn't even wake up to my screaming! With only a shadow of reluctance I headed to the bathroom, where I spent 10 minuets banging my head against a wall showering the blood away. The next 10 minuets where used when wrestled myself into Hinata's--or well I guess they were mine now--pajama's. Yes, it took 10 minuets, got something to say? Say it now. By the time I was done it was 2am, granted I hadn't a clue what time I'd woken up in the first place.

Hunger led me to the kitchen. What? It's been like a day! I need to eat! I quietly crept past Kakashi who, I had suspicions was actually awake and not peacefully slumbering on the couch with an Icha Icha book over his face. Never less, I was kindly quiet.

I sweat dropped guiltily when I came upon a shattered vase. Damn it, I knew I broke something! Naturally I did the first thing the came to mind. I bent over, picked up the mess, hurried back outside, and tossed it into the river. I'm so honest aren't I?

I rubbed my hands in an accomplished fashion as I began to walk away. "Sure hope that wasn't anything important." Don't learn from me kids.

"What are you doing out here?" I jumped like a child caught in the act and swirled around to face the voice.

"Oh it's only you." I sighed putting hand over my heart. "Could'a given me a heart attack." I mumbled.

"What do you mean, 'only you?'" Sasuke asked a vein throbbing in his temple, I'm impressed at myself for seeing it, it's so goddamned dark! "And I asked you what you're doing out here."

"Oh you know, going for a little swim." I said tugging on my still wet hair in a noticeably bad lie.

"You're lying." I suddenly had the strong erg to say 'duhhhhhhhh.' But I managed to hold it back. "What are you really doing out here?"

"I'm hiding the evidence." I said making quieting motions with my hands and looking around nervously for effect. He seemed to take a moment to fully digest this answer, a moment in which I held laughter at bay.

"Hiding what evidence?" He asked carefully. I guess I get this look on my face cuz he then quickly added, "and don't you dare say something like "that's a secret.'" I blinked at him my innocent chibi expression appearing again. Beware the chibi expression! Muwahahahaha! Ehem. "What?" he asked after a while, shifting uncomfortably under my relentless gaze.

Suddenly, I jumped him, in what I guess you could call a hug but was a hell of a lot more like a crazy person trying to rip out his hair. Oh my, I just called myself crazy didn't I?

"What the hell are you doing!?!" He cried.

"Is that you under that chicken ass hair, Xelloss?" I asked, excitedly pulling at Sasuke's hair.

"Who the hell is Xelloss?!" But sadly, the Uchiha's pained cry whet unnoticed by me.

"Come on outta there you mysterious, mazoku, trickster, priest!" I sang happily. Then I froze, a looked of realization dawning on my chibi face and I leapt away from him looking around frantically.

"What the hell—"

"You're here to steal my Clair Bible pages aren't you?!" I wined pointed an accusing finger at the bewildered boy. "Well you can't have them!" I cried turning a trying to flee though being held back by the waist by Sasuke who seemed to have regained mobility. "You can't have them! I paid good money for them off e-bay so you can't have them!" I continued trying and failing to run away.

"What the hell are you doing?!"

"Huh?" I finally answered poor Ice Cube, you can only ignore someone for so long I guess. "I'm 'fleeing.' You're trying to get my Clair Bible pages but I won't give them to you! No offence Xel I'm a huge fan and everything, think you're a right laugh but—"

"What are you talking about?!" heehee Sasuke looks like he's gonna splode.

"Don't try to deny it! I know what you did to Zelgadis!" I shouted.

"I'm not going to take your pages or whatever!" I blinked back at him and pouted distrustingly.

"You expect me to believe you?" I continued turning in his own grasp to face him, this is fun! "After I so clearly exposed you as the trickster priest himself!?" Sasuke, as though sensing I was gonna go on a rampage again, spoke fast.

"I'm not Xelloss, or whoever he is!" He was on the brink of shouting now.

"You're not?" I replied totally innocently. He nodded holding his breath and hoping that was the end of it. "Good, now I'm sure." I said relaxing in the young Uchiha's hold. He seemed to relax too, can ya really blame the guy. I can be a right pain when I want to, ne?

But wait, there's more!

"Hmm…" I breathed, still with far too much craziness pumping through my system. "You're right Uchiha," I continued leaning onto him and putting my head against his shoulder. He tensed instantly and, withholding a snicker, I wondered if he'd ever made the mistake of letting his fan girls get this close to him. "Xelloss never gets worked up so easily unless it's Filia." I whispered against his neck feeling the tremor go through him. Too easy. "You're still so tense." I purred gliding my cool hands up his chest to his shoulders. I was playing dumb and I wondered if he knew it. I don't think he did cuz he didn't really move. "You know, for a Popsicle you're awful warm." I snuggled closer, I think he stopped breathing, I'm so bad. "You sure you're not Xelloss?" I teased.

"I'm not." He answered. My, what a perfect surprise! If he wasn't trembling right now I may actually believe that monotone.

/That or he's not trembling and you're just full of yourself/

"So say you." I giggled surprising myself. Giggling was not a habit of mine, but it felt nice. I should take it up as a habit.

/Beats Drugs/

'You are very strange.'

Deciding I'd done enough damage I pulled away, grinning up at his stony face. I stopped for a moment, wondering if what I had done had any effect on him at all. 'Probably not.' I figured. He's not quite as easy as Tanner, that or I'd lost some of my flare. Damn. I pouted bringing my face up to his, this of course required me to be on my tip toes, damn again. I managed to lock eyes with him, more difficult then it sounds by the way, he seemed to be avoiding my gaze. "hmm." I hummed again deciding to take a different route. "It's late,"

"Hn."

"I'm a gonna call it a night kkz." I gave my favorite Xelloss smile and detached myself from the stoic boy.

----------------------------------**Sasuke's Prov that poor**-----------------------------

"Nighty night little Uchiha!"

I sighed dragging a hand over my face and slumping against the house's wall as she vanished into the building. I was cold again, but that could have easily been blamed on the air from the waters.

'What just happened?' I thought, replaying the previous events. I had not yet fallen asleep when her screams had sounded, muffled by the crashing waves, but still there. 'Shura, whoever he was. She had not cried, or well, not that I'd seen, which still surprised me. And then here I found her happy as a clown acting crazy. Forever probably passed as I leaned against that wall and in that same span of time I managed to come to one conclusion. 'That girl with sharingan eyes, she doesn't make any sense.' I gave a long shuttering breath out feeling exhaustion creep over me. Yes, I was quite ready to go to bed now. Who cares that I had to share a room with Naruto? I was tired and if he snored I'd just stick a cork in it. I smirked behind my hand, picturing the scenario.

Then suddenly a thought hit me. My eyes widened in disbelief. 'I don't believe it.' I thought. 'She never told me, what the evidence was.' I almost laughed at the absurdity of it all. But I'm a Uchiha, and Uchiha's do not laugh. "Yukari Irenara… You are insane…"

-----------------------------------------**Back to me, cuz I rock**--------------------------------------

Walking into the house I almost broke into song! Oh wait, I did break out into song! Quiet song, true, but song nonetheless. I couldn't believe I got away with it! I couldn't believe the methods I used to get away with it. I was just gonna leave it at the whole Xelloss thing but I just couldn't help it. I'm such a bad person, bored too apparently. I skipped to the kitchen merrily and pulled a cup out.

"Is it still me that makes you sweat  
am I who you think about in bed  
When the lights are dim and your hands are shaking  
as you're sliding off your dress"

I sang quietly while grinning far too happily. 'It must be a sin to be this happy.' I thought filling my cup with water.

"You think of what you did  
And how I hope to god it was worth it  
When the lights are dim and your heart is racing  
as your fingers touch his chest"

I twirled around on the tiled floors, savoring the ease with which I had done it, when only minuets ago I could hardly walk.

"I've got more wit, a better kiss, a hotter touch, a better fuck  
than anyone you'll ever meet, sweetie you had me  
Boy I was it, look past the sweat, a better love deserving of  
exchanging body heat in the passenger seat? AHHH!"

I almost actually screamed when I had twirled around to find myself being watched. I stumbled backwards, tripped over my own two feet, fell onto my ass and accidentally sent my cup of water flying. Oh yes, graceful aren't I?

"What a lovely voice you have, Yukari-chan." My watcher said, his one eye curving in silent laughter. "Interesting choice of lyrics though."

"Scarecrow what the hell do you think you're doing, skulking around in the middle of the night!? Trying to give me a fucking heart attack?!" I whispered harshly, attempting to keep my voice down for the sake of the poor sleeping people.

"Now, now, Yukari, young ladies shouldn't use such language." I twitched violently at the all too familiar words. "I simply heard a noise and got up to investigate."

"A noise huh?" I looked at him doubtfully.

"But of course. And I must admit I'm glad I did." I narrowed my eyes at him trying to find the hidden meaning. "Just imagine," He continued. "I'd have been very put out if I had missed your interaction with Sasuke." My palm met my forehead. "Of course teamwork is very important for a group to function—"

"Kakashi!" I whined stomping my foot childishly on the ground. His jaw dropped, his eye visibly widening at my complaint and I too realized what I had done only a moment after.

"You… said my name." He stated quietly.

"So what? Now I'm not allowed to say your name?" I asked grumpily snatching my cup away from him. I had never seen him catch it. He can't be as hurt as he's trying to pull off. "Goodnight." I called rather sharply, walking away and leaving a dumbfounded Kakashi in my wake. I hadn't ment to say the name, really I hadn't…

-------------------------------------------------**ZIPPO!** ------------------------------------------------

If one poor unlucky pedestrian happened to run into me at this very moment I suggest they run away as fast as humanly possible. Faster if it can be helped. I had not slept well thanks to Sakura, sure it wasn't exactly her fault, but still it was as annoying as hell. Rings around my eyes gave me a Gaara look but my tired face was drawn into a childlike expression that I was not proud of. I stumbled into the kitchen with far less then my usual grace, rubbing my eyes groggily.

"Ah, so good of you to join us, Yukari."

'Must he tease me so early in the morning?' I glared tiredly at Kakashi, granted I couldn't really see him. My eyesight was blurry and I wanted nothing more then to go right back to sleep. "I'm over here Yukari-chan." He chirped. I narrowed my eyes to find that indeed the black blur I had been glaring at had not been Kakashi at all, but it wasn't moving, maybe it was a coat or something. Oops.

"Shut up." I said grumpily taking a seat at the table next to the coat.

"That's not very nice Yukari-chan." That's it, I'ma gonna strangle Haruno! Someone stop me now!

"Fine." I replied through gritted teeth. "PLEASE shut up." The words cracked like a whip and I sensed more then saw, with some satisfaction, Sakura shrinking away from me.

"Not a morning person, Yukari-chan?" Even with these eyes I knew Kakashi was smiling, that jerk. I gave a long dragged out sigh in defeat, let's face it, I'm not a morning person.

I made a small whimpering noise that could be defined as discomfort. "Shouldn't you be tired too? You were up pretty damn late, skulking around in the dark."

"Now now, Yukari, I don't skulk."

"Keh, and Haruno's hair isn't pink." I snorted rather unladylike. I blinked in surprise as someone placed a bowl before me.

"Just eat it when you feel up to it." The girls voice was soft. From my lazy half lidded eyes I could see brown hair, a peach complexion, and a modest pink outfit. The girl was taller then me undoubtedly, but then again most people were, except of course little Hinata-chan. This reminded me that I was in fact, still in my pajamas. Seeing me look down at my attire the girl answered my unspoken question. "I should be able to get the blood out of your clothes by tomorrow."

"Thank you." I muttered politely, nodding numbly and tightening my hold on the jacket draped over my shoulders so it covered more. The silk was unwrinkled though the buttons wear done up off center so I looked cutely disheveled. The Pajamas were cute I'll admit it, comfy even. Not a soul had seen me in this little get up, aside from Hianta to see if it fit, and I sure as hell planned to keep it that way.

A yawn escaped me. I had always taken pride in my rather impressively sharp canines and had often used them to scare the shit out of younger kids. I'm a bad person I know but it was fun. However there was one person they didn't work against. His name was Tanner. The jackass.

Something warm fell on my feet. I looked down and through squinted eyes determined the grey blob under the table to be Summer Storm. I wondered briefly if they'd fed him, but of course, they wouldn't starve him, they were too nice. I reached for the spoon to my breakfast only to be, erm, interrupted?

"So you can be polite."

And I screamed.

My arm jerked sending my bowl flying into the seat next to me. I scooted back pointing a surprised finger at the jacket with wide uncomprehending eyes. "The coat is speaking! Why is the coat speaking!?"

"Sasuke-kun!" I heard Sakura gasp. I blinked, and squinted my eyes in an attempt to focus. Slowly the sight before me became clearer till I was staring into the Honey Nut Cheerio covered face of Sasuke Uchiha. I lowered my hand and tried to play it cool.

"Huh, well I'll be damned." I said casually watching milk drip from the tip of Sasuke nose. My morning just got a hell'va lot better.

"Oh my god! Sasuke-kun, are you okay?!" no, I wasn't the one who said that, nor was I the one fussing over the Uchiha. You can blame that on Pinky. She had a rag in her hand, from god knows where, trying to mop up the mess. And Sasuke? Sasuke was stiff as a bored, his eyes closed, praying for patience…

---------------------------------------------------- ---------------------------------------------------

"Check it out, it's like Scarecrow has a bunch of mini plungers stuck to the bottom of his feet!" I exclaimed. They all looked at me strangely and Kakashi sweat dropped.

"That's probably the stupidest thing I've ever heard." Sasuke scoffed.

"I guess you don't hear yourself when you talk then do you?" I retorted. It was good to be on glaring terms with him again. Wait, I was always on glaring terms with him.

/I can't imagine why/

'heehee'

"I can assure you that I'm doing this with my chakra, not mini plungers. This is how it's done." Kakashi started from his place… upside down on a tree branch. "Gather your Chakra at the bottom of your feet and make it attach to the tree trunk. Something like this is possible if you use Chakra. The main purpose of this training is to accumulate the right amount of molded Chakra in the right location," Kakashi said. "This is difficult even for a well-trained ninja. The amount of Chakra used for this tree climbing exercise is quite subtle. And the most difficult place to concentrate Chakra is said to be behind the feet. In other words, if you master this, you can learn any kind of technique. In theory, that is. The second purpose is to maintain that molded Chakra. Most of the time, ninja mold their Chakra during battle. In that situation, it is even more difficult to maintain that Chakra."

I think my eyes were swirling comically. I knew how to do it, but he's making it way more complicated then it needs to be. I'd have just said, look at the tree, guess the amount of chakra needed to climb it, and keep trying till you get it right.'

"Well, it's not like anything is going to happen even if I give this lecture. I need all of you to learn it with your bodies."A kunai landed in front of each of us and I picked mine up warily. "Use that knife to mark where you are able to climb up to with your current ability. Then try to make a new mark above that mark. You guys aren't good enough to climb by walking, so run to give yourself a boost, and get used to it. Got it?"

"This training is too easy for me!" Naruto bragged "Since I'm the guy who is growing the most right now." I rolled my eyes.

"Okay, be quiet. Try and climb up any of the trees," Scarecrow said. I was aware, as I lazily eyed my tree, of my three teammates forming a hand sign and concentrating really hard.

"All right! Let's go!" Naruto shouted, and as though it were some kind of signal they all took off. It was much quicker for me to gather my chakra, almost natural like breathing as I had done this many times. 'If I can walk on water, I can certainly walk up some stupid tree.' I told myself.

A proud smile graced my lips as I began my way up the tree. 'Thank you Hinata!' I thought. Honestly without her, I'd have done a truly terrible job.

"This is easier than I thought!" I heard Pinky on my left. I was already higher then her but she was perched happily on a tree branch.

"Wow, Sakura!" I heard Naruto comment from the ground. He hadn't exactly gone very far. 'Hey, it's like how I did the first time I tired.' I sweat dropped at the thought. Sakura giggled and stuck her tongue out playfully.

"Damn it." Sasuke muttered and I watched as Pinky's face fell. Ungrateful little. I looked at his mark. Higher then Narutos true but still nothing to brag about. "

"Well, who would have thought that the ones who are best at controlling their chakra are the girls, Sakura and Yukari." Kakashi observed.

"Angel-chan?" Naruto asked. "Where is Angel!?"

"Check it out mofos I've got mini plungers too!" I shouted giving a rather cheesy peace symbol. I was hanging upside down on a high placed branch as easily as Kakashi had. I'll admit it, I was showing off and I couldn't hide my grin.

"What!? You can do it too?!" Naruto called.

"Well, keep it up then. Who knows? Maybe Naruto won't be the one to become Hokage after all. And I suppose the Uchiha clan isn't as great as I thought, either." Kakashi sighed. Sakura gasped.

"Shut up sensei!"

I grinned and flipped to the ground, wanting in on the game. "Hmm, Hokage Sakura doesn't sound too bad." I commented. Sakura blushed and Naruto whirled on me. "And perhaps I should have been the Uchiha." I nodded with a fake but thoughtful look. "Uchiha Yukari… hm kinda just rolls off your tongue doesn't it?" Sasuke clenched his fist and I grinned wickedly.

"All right, I'm going to catch up to Sasuke first," Naruto said determinedly. "I'm going to do this!"

"I want you to continue," Scarecrow stated. That's right it was an order.

"Hai sensei!" echoed around our clearing.

-------------------------------------------------------- ------------------------------------------------

I opened my eyes and gazed at the sky. Pure blue. Clouds didn't even exist here apparently. Sounds of construction work could be heard to my right. I myself was sprawled out atop the ledge by the waters, my arms lazily under my head in an attempt to get comfortable. By the bottom of my feet lay Storm whom I was positive was sleeping and at my side was none other then the pink menace herself, sitting, just as lazily as me mind you.

When Kakashi had asked us to guard Tazuna at the bridge, I dunno what I thought it was gonna be like, but boring beyond all belief wasn't exactly it. Next time we go into town I'm gonna buy a book or something. It was eerie, Pinky kept staring at me, a glance here or there, and when I closed my eyes it would be for a prolonged period of time. Why was she staring, you ask? No fucking clue. I checked my face like three times, and I can assure you there's nothing on it, but if it was my pajamas she wanted to see there was no way in hell I'd let her. The last time this happened she wanted advice, I gave it to her, what could she possibly want now?

I glanced over to see Tazuna approaching us, a beam of steal carried over his shoulder, and I took off an ear phone so I could hear over 'Escape the Fate.'

"You always this lazy?" He asked casually.

"Only when I can help it." I responded when Sakura didn't say a word.

"Where's the weird blond kid and the one with the attitude?" He continued, nearing us.

"They're training. Climbing trees." Sakura pitched in. I sighed; she made our training sound rather pitiful.

"Too tough for you?" I felt a hinge of annoyance.

"No, in fact, I'm the best. That's why the sensei sent me here to guard you." Pinky bragged and couldn't help but roll my eyes. She was so full of it.

"Is that so? What about you then?" I knew he didn't believe her and I almost laughed.

"I've already learned this. My chakra control training took place before now." I t wasn't a lie. "I wouldn't, however, commend Haruno on being the best. Till she can walk on air, that's when I'll acknowledge it." I yawned smirking slightly. They hadn't missed the implications. Is it even possible to walk on air? I don't think it is. Huh, I'll have to ask Hinata on that one.

"Tazuna, uh, I need to talk to you." The statement caught my eyes and I watched with hidden interest as a man joined us. He had brown hair and wasn't exactly that young.

"Yeah what is it?"

"Uh, thing is. I've been thinking a lot about the bridge and… I decided… I've pushed my luck far enough. I want out." The change in atmosphere was startlingly drastic. The air became tense and voices rose…

"Now you're going to quit on me?! Just like that?!" Tazuna shouted. "You're kidding?!"

"You know, I stayed on because of our friendship," his voice didn't raise, "but I'm putting my life on the line every day I stay here. Gatto and his thugs will show up eventually. When they do… they'll kill you and the bridge will never get finished anyway."

'Real optimist, that one'

"It's a lost cause Tazuna. Why don't we quit while we can still get out of this with our lives?"

My gaze became half lidded as an uneasy silence poisoned the air. 'He's afraid, afraid for his life, afraid for his family, afraid of what may come. He doesn't want to die, then again, who does?'

"No chance." Tazuna finally answered. "This is our bridge. Our island is poor, and it will stay that way until the bridge connects us to the main land. Comers, trade and hope; that's what we're building here." He growled out.

"There's not gonna be much hope if we're all dead." The other man said, still with that annoying resigned voice. 'The fool. What does he think we're here for? Decoration?'

"It's already noon," Tazuan bit out beginning to walk away again, 'Break for lunch."

"Tazuna, let's not end it like this."

"Keh, save your breath. Oh and Gichi," He continued bitterly, turning away, "don't bother coming back after lunch."

I gave an uncomfortable sigh and put my iPod away. 'Could have been worse,' I reasoned, 'could have been a mushie moment.' I grunted as I stood, more out of habit then strain for my wounds seemed to have already closed, and followed after the bridge builder. When I neared, he turned and his beady eyes watched me walk past him. I bent again, this time pumping chakra into my arms so I wouldn't break my back, and picked up a beam.

"Um," awkward, "where do ya want it?" I asked not making eye contact. The last thing I want is people to think I'm a nice person. Unbeknownst to me Tazuna was focusing less on my odd act of kindness and a hell of a lot more on the fact that I had so casually picked up the beam of steal. "Hey," I began again. "I just thought that since you're now one person short you could use a little help but if you don't want it—"

"No, no, it's fine." He said hastily. "Over there, if you could, by that pile."

"Hn."

And we worked into the afternoon, Pinky joining us after a particularly snide comment from me. Strom, well he couldn't really help with the construction so e sorta just napped the whole day away, lucky brat. Tazuna sadly went back to being a complete grump. He's not such a bad guy I suppose… when he doesn't talk. Every time he muttered something like 'unbelievable' when I picked something up, Yeah, I wanted to sock'em in the face. I know he didn't mean it harmfully but damn. Can you say tactless?

It was getting increasingly difficult to hide how hard it really was to continuously keep lifting steal beams twice my size. Even with my pride being as enormous as it was, a grunt here or there would escape me. I even resorted to burning Chakra for energy, it kept me going another hour or so. But I really started to worry when the first signs of perspiration showed. It ment that, no matter how silent I was or how easy I tried to make it look, sweat would betray me. As a result I could have kissed Tazuna when he suggested we stop and go into town to get dinner. I wouldn't have, but I still could have. The old man still grated on my nerves.

The town wasn't quite as crowded as I had imagined it to be. Several people shied away from us as though they thought they'd be hurt by association. Then again anyone with any sort of knowledge would know Tazuna was practically been marked for dead. Curiously I looked around. The people were literally painful to look at. Children huddled on street corners looking sickly, skinny, and pale. A young boy rushed past us having robbed some man with a truly disturbing goatee. The shops where, how do I call them pathetic without sounding immensely rude? They lacked a great deal of products. The food stores had scraps and others had unreasonably high prices on ridiculous items.

We entered what was supposed to be a food store. "Well I'll be damned." I said. "A whole carrot, and… oh my god, there's another one." I made sure to say it quietly but honestly this was the first one I've seen since I entered this village. Not that I like carrots, actually, I don't like them at all… huh… And then I saw it. My eyes grew wide when they came in contact with its slick golden-green surface. The diamond in the ruff. Here in this run down little excuse for a food store, were apples. One in particular green apple was what had caught my attention though. There was something positively amazing about green apples that made my stomach churn in a way that reminded me how I'd been too stubborn to ask for another bowl of cereal this morning.

I snatched the apple up holding protectively too my chest as though I thought someone would try to steal it from me. I moved to the front of the store with a paranoid frown and approached the man at the desk. He wasn't young, maybe late thirties and didn't look like too bad a guy. He could afford to buy a tooth brush for he didn't appear to know what they were, and a hair cut wouldn't kill him either. The man needed to choose between shaving and a beard for he was hovering close to both, honestly, it looked like it itched like hell.

"What can I help you with little lady?" Oh dear, he shouldn't smile either. I'm sure he's a nice guy, and hey married too, by the ring on his hand, but it's still creepy as all get out.

"I'd just like to buy this." I said as politely as possible, hell I even smiled.

"Hm, you look like my daughter…" He said absently. I flinched violently though he didn't seem to notice.

"Do I?" I managed.

"Such a pretty girl." He continued.

"You're too kind." My smile was stiff but I dug the money out of my pocket just the same.

"She could have had any man she wanted." His eyes seemed to have a glaze to them as he spoke and my hand froze.

"Could have?" No, no, his daughter couldn't have been dead. I was looking into this too much…

"Yeah, the wife and I hadn't a clue till it was too late." I felt my heart catch in my throat. Was it Gatto? I wanted to ask, but he didn't seem to wish to end the conversation. "But Clare is nice enough I guess, it just took us some getting some too." I blinked stupidly at him.

"Clare?"

"Yeah, she and my daughter are seeing each other apparently." I blinked again for a moment. "You're not a lesbian by any chance are you my dear?" I sweat dropped. I reminded this man of his lesbian daughter and her lover Clare. Go me! "Of course it's not my place to ask it, sorry." He said, quickly taking my offered money.

"Keep the change." I said walking away with my apple. I wonder how long it'll take him to notice I gave him enough money for three apples. "And Sir," he looked up at me nervously, "I'm straight. Tell your daughter I say hi."

Outside the store Summers Storm who had been silent all morning ran into the side of my leg. I looked down. He sat at my heels making a small whining noise. "Hungry?" I asked. I followed his gaze to the apple in my hand. "Oh no, no no no! Whatever they fed you back at the house. Eat that!" I exclaimed. He whimpered again. "My apple! Mine!" Whimper. My resolve was crashing. "But you're a carnivore, you don't like fruit!" I reasoned. Whimper. "Gah! Fine take it!" I tossed painfully and he jumped to catch it. "Weird animal."

Rejoining Sakura and Tazuna outside the store I cued in on what they were talking about. "You really surprised me back there." Tazuna said. Memory collided with me and there was a brief instant where I saw Sakura scream 'pervert' and punch some guys face in. I almost laughed when I saw Sakura's face contort as a kid appeared. She however did not pound the child's face in, not that I expected her too, of course. The minute she gave the kid candy I knew it was gonna get mushie.

It was reflex that pulled me into the nearest shop to escape what I knew would be really awkward. The only mushiness I could handle was when it was between Maya and me. I wouldn't have gagged, at least I hope I wouldn't have, it was just really awkward, that was all. And I mended awkward with craziness, hell I mended everything with craziness! This was usually highly inappropriate. Take Zabuza for instance. Haha, Cazy is always fun!

A look around told me I'd escaped into a rummage store, or something like it. The prices were clearly too high, and the stuff there wasn't exactly in perfect condition. The floors were concrete like every other store and gave the air a cold feeling that made me glade I didn't wear ninja sandals. A close rack hung maybe ten feet to my left, displaying a gaudy purple dress on what actually looked like a good manikin. Pity.

"Stupid kid, you can't pay then get out."

If that man was talking to me he'd better rethink his words. 'Does he have any fucking clue how my week has been?'

"You get out right now. Don't dirty my store with your homeless feet."

I swirled around to face the desk, I'm pretty sure steam was coming out of my ears. I'm bipolar like that. I inhaled breath sharply ready to tell the man to shut his face when I saw her. When I saw Maya…

_Mayas breath hitched and I saw blood pouring rapidly out of her stomach where my bastard father had cut ruthlessly into her back. For a moment all was still her eyes wide like my own, her blood staining my clothes. She fell to the floor twitching slightly. I was in shock as I looked back into the demonic face of my dad._

The man's hand was raised to smack Maya away. And quite suddenly, that man was my father. His pale skin tanned, his blond hair became black, and his blue eyes darkened several shades. 'no.' I though dazedly. 'No not again.'

_I turned over her body and held her close. "Yuki, Yuki you're alright." She sighed the smallest of smiles lighting up her face. I tried to smile back but mine was weaker then hers. _

"_I'm fine Maya, we're both fine. He'll never hurt you again! I promise! We're both gonna be fine!" Even though I said it, I knew she was dying, I knew since her blood had first stained my black tank top. I stroked her blond hair while biting my lip to fight back hysteria. _

"_Yuki I don't think I'm gonna make it. You know it too don't you. I'm t-ten, n-not stupid." She shuddered continuously._

"_Don't be silly Maya, there's no way you're gonna die!" I insisted. _

"_Yuki, I-I love you Yuki, never forget me. P-Promise me Yuki! You'll never f-forget m-me?" Her eyes glittered with hope as she peered into my own crimson orbs._

"_Of course Maya, never, I promise." She smiled at me, the last time I'd see that sweet smile and her eyes glazed over her body becoming limp. I leaned down and kissed her forehead. "I love you too… Maya."_

And before I knew what was going on there was a rush of adrenaline and fury pounding through my viens, and then, the loud cracking of my fist sending him sprawling into the wall behind him. "You will not touch her!" I snarled furiously.

Maya gasped at my side and noise was what woke me. Like a veil lifted from bridal eyes I saw the man shocked on the other side of his desk a split lip and nose he was lucky I didn't break. The differences between him and my father were quite clear, in fact, there wasn't even a hint of one in the other. He looked petrified and angry but too scared to say anything till his shock passed. 'Still,' I thought, wanting to growl. 'He was going to hit Maya.'

Time froze as those words sunk in. I knew Maya was dead, I held her as she passed. I knew my father was dead, I slit his throat myself. 'So then, who is this?' My brow furrowed as I turned back to the girl. My eyes slid over her frightened form, taking in her blond pigtails, the form behind with which she stood, her tanned freckled skin, that had been so pale that night, so very very pale, and in all these aspects she was the same. 'But no,' I realized, this was not my Maya. This girl was younger, mini Maya, much shorter then me, she looked like she was 7. And my Maya had never looked at me this way, so frightfully, the girl was terrified, a book held tightly to her chest in fear, probably what she had been trying to purchase. And her eyes, her eyes were purple.

I did a double take and, though a moment before all that I wanted to do was comfort her, anything, just make that fearful expression wipe away from that familiar face, what came out was entirely different. "You have Xelloss eyes." I was surprised by my own words.

"I-I'm sorry?" She didn't know what to say and her eyes couldn't leave from mine. It wasn't a new thing for me to have someone unable to break eye contact with me. It was a powerful weapon and a strong hindrance. I bent down putting my hands on my knees, my expression softening to a small smile, and reached out my hand. She flinched, it pained me to watch, but I put my hand atop her head in an affectionate fashion.

"I'm sorry to have scared you… child." I almost said 'Maya.'

"I-I'm not s-scared!" she protested weakly. I grinned.

"Good, you don't need to be afraid of me." I said quietly. My hand pulled away and the girl opened her eyes as I stood. "I'm glad that man didn't hurt you… Imoto-san." I said quietly, fully ready to tear my presence away from what was so painfully familiar.

"W-wait." The girl gasped reaching after me though with clear hesitance. Despite it all it still felt warm, that she called out to me, wanted me to stay even for a moment. I didn't know what she ment to say, but let's pretend I did.

"Oh yeah." I said carelessly turning back to the desk. "Hey buddy, I didn't hit ya that hard, get up and show some service will ya." I demanded adding in a whisper I knew he heard, "God ya think Konoha NINJA'S would get some service protecting your sorry asses and all." This drove the man into fear mode, the word ninja, I mean. I took the book from the girl who didn't speak a word and examined it myself. Finally deciding what it was worth I pulled the money out of my pocket and slammed it down in front of him. "This book has been unfairly priced, however," I swiped a small bottle off the shelf to my right and pocketed it as he reached out greedily, "I'll take this for free and you can all the money it's tagged." He hesitated clearly wanting to speak only to make the mistake of looking me in the eye. "Well then," I continued pleasantly facing the little girl who still hadn't moved. "I believe this is yours." She hesitated in taking the book but I was patient.

"Thank you." She said at last. I nodded acceptingly and started to walk away again. "W-wait please." I did not stop, but I sure as hell didn't expect her to follow me because of it! "Hey wait! Come back!" My brow furrowed, she wasn't going anywhere. I briefly noticed that somewhere along the line I had lost Summers Storm. Oops. I stopped, middle of the street and everything.

"Something else you wanted kid?" My voice was casual my tone curious.

"I uh, my name is Yuzu." she greeted warmly. I blinked at the tiny hand before slowly shaking it.

"I am Yukari."

"Yuzu!" The girl turned in reaction to the voice, her hand still in mine, and I rose my gaze to meet the newcomer. It was a boy, a cute boy. Haha. He was of lean build and though he couldn't have been more then 6 inches taller then me he was undoubtedly my age. He had unkempt black hair and sunglasses shaded his eyes from me.

/he's cute./

The fact that I agreed amused me. "Yuzu! What did I tell you about talking to strangers?" He lectured with a stern look.

"But, but aniki…" He sighed his face falling at the cutest puppy dog pout I've ever seen in my entire life. I'd have cracked too. The little girl saw the spot of weakness and dove in, removing her hand from mine she tackled the boy in a hug.

/Oh she's good./

Any pretense of anger or worry fell the boys face, clearly this kid was a sucker for his sister. 'I can relate.' I thought. Deciding I could probably slip away I tried doing just that only to find that the girl had detached herself from her brother and was tugging animatedly on my hand for me to join them. "Come on, I want you to meet him!" She insisted. I sweat dropped, how did I end up here again?

"Onisan I want you to meet Yukari-nee." The boy faltered momentarily, but believe you me I was way more surprised by the title she'd given me. Big sister. "And, and Yukari-nee, I want you to meet my onisan, Kai-nii." Still in shock I was the first to recover, erm, sorta.

"It's a, uh, pleasure to meet you Kai-san." I couldn't exactly hold out my right hand in greeting as it had his sister at the other end. I offered my left hand with a meek expression. He laughed. Tension fled with the laugh and Yuzu joined him for no apparent reason. I smiled slightly. Weird people.

"Pleasure to meet you Yukari-san." He chuckled at last, I smiled but it faltered when I noticed he was glaring at me over the rim of his glasses. His eyes were… sweet, another one with purple eyes! Despite my mad need to get a closer look his glare stopped me. I suppose it was more of a sharp calculating stare. It wasn't even playful or gradual it was sudden and really quite terrifying. Not that I'm terrified or anything. There was humor in his words, casualty even, but his purple eyes studied my every word, assessing me with experience.

I narrowed my eyes for a moment and smirked. "Please drop the honor fic, 'Yukari-san' must taste strange on your tongue."

"And you as well." He commented back. "So how did you meet little Yuzu?"

'Ah, so that's it.' I thought.

"She-she saved me brother! From that mean man at the store, he was yelling really loud and he was gonna hit me and she saved me!" Yuzu answered enthusiastically. His face seemed to lighten and darken at the same time.

"Bastard." He muttered.

'He's protective' I noted. "Don't worry too much about it, he, uhh, heh, he won't try it again." I assured, Kia seemed to renotice my presence from whatever he'd been thinking and he blinked in surprise. "You're welcome." I supplied. Silence. "You have Xelloss eyes." It just came out, I swear!

"Hey," Yuzu started, "That's what you said to me too isn't it???? Xelloss."

"Xelloss eyes." He repeated slowly. "Mozoku…" My eyes widened. No fucking way.

"You…" I licked my lips. "You know who Xelloss is?"

THE END!

I'M KIDDING! I'M KIDDING!

NO BODY LEAVE, DAMN IT! Haha

-----I am however doing a prov change. Why? Because I'm incredibly mean? Heehee.----

"What happened to the one with the red eyes?" Tazuna asked me conversationally as I unloaded groceries. I froze quickly glancing around and finding Summers Storm lying in the corner with an apple core, but his master no where in sight. NO! We lost Yukari!

"Is there something wrong Sakura?" Kakashi asked leaning casually on his crutch. For a moment I couldn't answer. I had lost Yukari. I lost her!

"N-no nothing at all!" I squeaked covering my mouth a moment after. He gave me a skeptical look with his one eye but my hands were tightly over my mouth. "Okaay, let's try this again. Sakura, is there something wrong?"

"muffmermmmhhmusffemr." I responded through my hands.

"Pardon." He asked sardonically. I couldn't take the pressure.

"Sensei! We lost Yukari and it's gonna be dark soon, and there are perverts out there and her sense of direction sucks! And you said Zabuza is still alive right???" Yes, I was panicking now.

"Sakura!" Kakashi chuckled putting a hand on my shoulder, his tone suggested he's tried calling my name a number of times before now.

"huh?"

"She'll be fine." And he walked away.

------------------------Okay back to me cuz I'm cooler haha---------------------

Top of Form

"You know who Xelloss is?"

We were introduced to one hell of a painful silence and within that silence the tension grew. The streets were empty now and the sky was darkening. Yuzu looked at the two of us in confusion even as the atmosphere darkened to shades of black.

"Yuzu," Kia started his eyes fixed on me. "Go home."

"But I wanna stay with Yukari-nee!"

"Yuzu!" She jumped at his tone, slowly detaching herself from my right arm. There was another moment of silence though he seemed to relax now that his sister was gone. He sighed taking his sunglasses off and reviling his whole violet eyes to me. "Who are you?"

"Irenara Yukari, Tokyo Japan." I said taking a chance. If there was a way he was from my world even the smallest chance…

"Yukasha Kai, Kumogakure." My brows furrowed. "And that… was Jennifer Rivers, Michigan, America." I blinked once… then twice…

…

"The fuck?"

**A/N: **Okay I'm ending it there. Because uh it's like 27 pages. I'll update soon though that whole writers block thing is gone now. I'm sorry if this chapie wasn't very good and we haven't gotten very far. I'm really sorry! Bare with me here. Any-la-who, I've introduced you to Kai, who before like 20 minutes ago I didn't know was gonna exist but I figured he'll be fun to write. So now I'm ranting. Oh dear. Oh well! Any way Thank my loyal reviewers I love you dearly. Next time on Fuck, I Think My TV's Broken: Hilarity, fighting, bisexuals, confusion, fan girls, lies, and more yelling! What more could you ask for in next times chapter 9, Do I Look Gay To You? PLEASE REVIEW!!!!!!! LOVE!


	10. Do I Look Gay To You?

**A/N: **Kkz I'm back and I'm ready for action! In one of my longest chapters yet to date! Thank you, thank you very much! Christmas is coming. I'm psyched for the holidays. I may even update sooner than usual since I'll be at home more often and I've got a lot of the next chapie planned out in my head. But, hell, I left ya'll at a bit of a cliffy, so I shant rant too long, ne? I winged a lot of this chapter and I changed Kai's story like 3 times. It's sad, but appropriate, since all the Naruto children have something sad about them. Ya know, I'm ranting, ignore me. Please enjoy the chapie!

**Oceanbornspirit **is now my much-celebrated beta, I really needed a beta, so everyone say thanks, cuz otherwise my spelling would really suck. Haha.

**Skyheart **is my much-anticipated 100th review! WHOOHOOO! A nice one too, says I'm funny. Yay! Heehee.

**Kukilabu **I simply had to add this one cuz this person went all the way through what I KNOW is a long fan fiction and left a review for every single chapter. That deserves something, right? I agree. And I do love the reviews, they're just so neat, you have a way with words my friend. THANK YOU, KUKILABU!

And now, the moment you've all been waiting for! ON WITH THE SHOW!

**Chapter 9**

**Do I Look Gay to You?**

**(We all die eventually, Geki. We live the lives we're given and then we die, whether or not we choose to make a difference is entirely up to us.)**

"The fuck?"

Kai sighed, wiping his sunglasses with a small cloth like some British guy or something. It just didn't make any sense. He was saying that Yuzu was really Jennifer and that she was from America. That would make him from America too, right? How the hell do people from America end up in an anime??? … How the hell do people from Tokyo end up in an anime? You know, I never really thought about just how bizarre my being here was. I mean, come on, I'm two-dimensional now! No one here would believe me if I told them…

"Did your TV suck you in too?" I spoke with a sympathetic expression. He looked at me oddly with those yummy purple eyes.

"Not exactly… your TV sucked you in?" he gave a funny smile. "Care to join me for a walk?" I nodded. This would take some time, I supposed.

And so it began, it was awkward, but rather funny if you ask me. I let him choose where to walk, as I didn't really know my way around here. And he told me his story. How he and his sister ended up here—Kumogakure, to be more precise.

"I guess I'll just start then." He seemed to be thinking of how to tell me. "I was originally born in California." Oh my, we really were starting from the start. "We moved to Michigan when I was 3 or 4, and my life with my parents was slightly… confusing."

_My father was abusive._

"_Jessie," our neighbor would plead, "I'm begging you, you have to tell someone." They didn't know I was listening. _

"_David, its fine. I'm fine, see? The swelling's already going down." I could hear David's head shaking in desperation. _

"_Jess, if you don't stop this soon he might start on the kid." My mother slammed her ice bag onto the table._

"_He'd never do something like that! John is a good man! My husband adores our boy, and I love him!"_

"_Damn it, Jessica, I've known you how long!?" His hands shook the table on impact. "Stop lying to yourself and consider that maybe the man you fell in love with changed!"_

_I watched from the crack between the door and the wall, my mother wince at his anger. David sighed and let his hands go limp at his side._

"_Look Jess, I'm sorry, okay? I didn't mean to get angry, it's just, damn it, I wish you'd just call the police. This is serious! You could have lost your eye, Jess! Thank god I was home, there's not another doctor around who wouldn't ask questions."_

_I was 5._

_She never did call…_

"Did he hurt you?" Kai was silent after my question and I growled in anticipation. But he wouldn't shake me off, damn it, not after all the times I took a beating from my own father. "Kai, did your father hurt you?!"

"No," he said at last.

_I was only ever hit by a parent once, and it scared the hell out of me._

"_Mom this isn't right. You need to tell somebody." I shouldn't have had to wipe up her blood. No child should._

"_You sound like David now." She was irritable._

"_He's right, you should call someone." I overstepped my bounds._

"_How do you know he suggested that?" I wouldn't lie to her. "Where you spying on us? What right do you have to spy on my private conversations?" She was so angry._

"_I was worried."_

"_That's not an excuse!" Her eyes were wide, fearful, and perhaps afraid that I may tell. "You won't do it again, you hear me!? You leave this to the grownups!"_

"_Mom." I shouldn't have spoken. "Someone's got to know!" _

_SMACK._

_My head stayed to the side for a moment, that brief moment of shock when the tears came, my gut twisted, and my throat burned. A moment later, my mother realized what she'd done, and hugged me, sobbing for forgiveness. She blamed it on her hormones from the pregnancy; she blamed it on the stress and the pain. Never once did she blame it on Father, but of course, that's who I would blame._

_I was 7._

"And then Jennifer was born. She was so tiny and helpless." I didn't know why he was laughing, nor would I ask.

_It never ceased to amaze me that my father and the man hitting my mother were the same man. Of course, I knew it was, but somehow I had managed to separate the two, so that I might love my father and still hate the man who hurt my mother. He was always so very gentle with me, kind, and giving. And when Jennifer was born, he had the softest look in his eyes I had ever seen. He was a good father, a bad husband, but, a good father, I suppose._

"Then things took a turn for the worse. Our mother fell ill. Very ill, she was diagnosed with a rare systematic virus, something eerily like Ebola. I can't imagine how she got it… Soon my parents' relationship began to break down, or what was left of it anyway. Father wanted to move Jen and me, but it would be too much for Mother, this meant he'd take us, but not her. She argued that he wouldn't be able to care for the child, as Jen was so young, and things turned sour.

"At one point, I remember hearing them argue, the last argument, I think… Their voices raised and I was naturally curious. Mother shouted how she wanted to keep us. She wanted to take the matter to court. And then my father… it was in heat of the argument, I think, or I like to think, he told her that he could provide for us, that he didn't want Jen and me getting too attached before she died. Mom was so upset… she was always very fragile about how little time she had before the virus bled out through her liver." He paused again, longer this time. But I dare not have spoken or even looked. I watched the last rays of sun disappear over the horizon of trees. It was beautiful. "Jen was 3 months old, I was 7. And in the heat of that argument, my father grabbed his jacket and went out. He never came home. Mother was distraught. I think the depression may have worsened her illness. She cared for Jen and me, sure, she loved us unconditionally, but… the illness was terminal, after all."

_I saw their fight through a crack in the door._

"_Jess, it's best for the children. I'll take them away. We'll go somewhere nice. They can live with me and I'll provide excellent lives for them."_

"_NO! You will not take my children away from me!" She was so scared._

"_Listen to reason, woman! They're my children" He was angry._

"_No, just shut up and listen to me for once, John! They're my children too, you know!" She was furious._

"_I only want what's best for them!" His patience was slipping._

"_What's best is for them to be with their mother!" _

_SLAM!_

_The table was surely going to crack with the force of his fist._

"_What's best is if they don't get too attached to someone who's only going to die!"_

_All was silent as my mother cried. But the tension, it had been so thick, and finally, inevitably, it snapped._

"_You bastard," she hissed. It was the first time I heard my mother swear. "Get out." She shook._

"_What?" My father was dumbstruck._

"_I said get out. Get out of my home! Get the hell out of here, you son of a bitch!"_

_Rage._

_And in that rage, my father left, slamming the door behind him. And my mother broke down in a fit of tears. _

_I was at her side in seconds._

"After a year, she began showing more signs of internal bleeding, the kind that can't be cured. She got sick frequently and one day while she was driving me to school, she went into a seizure. We drove right into a tree. I didn't know what to do. She was unconscious and I felt like I was dying. I shook her and screamed for her to answer, driven hysterical by pain. I think someone else may have dialed 911, cuz it sure as hell wasn't me."

"_Mommy! Mommy! Wake up. Mommy it hurts." I cried, torn between gripping my leg or my left arm. I gasped when I saw the pipe protruding from one of my legs all the way to the other. I was only 8, it was too much. "Mommy, Mommy! Please, you've gotta wake up. We've gotta get this thing outta me. There's something in my leg, Mommy! Mommy, why won't you wake up?"_

…

"_M-Mommy? Mommy, y-you're bleeding." I buried my face in my hands, and I cried._

"I ended up in the hospital with a spiral fractured arm and a banged up thigh. My mother, however…" I felt a sinking sensation. "Her window had shattered and there were glass fragments all over her face. Her seat belt had almost choked her to death and left scary looking welts on her skin. She was hooked up to life support and all the morphine she could stand. After two weeks in the hospital, Jen and I were sent to a foster home. They let us visit mother, naturally. But the last day I visited her, her breathing sounded strange… gurgled, I guess would be the best word." His brow furrowed and he stopped walking to lean against a tree. "The next day, I found out how she had drowned in her own blood. I did a bit of digging, and it turns out it was quite painful…"

_I gripped at my mother's hand. I had felt strange all day. Anxious. I wasn't supposed to come here, but it was only a mile from the school and I had to make sure she was all right. _

"_Is it time for you to visit me already? How long have I been here, my son?" The words were choked and without the bandages, her face was scarred. _

"_A couple weeks. Don't worry, Mom, we're gonna make sure you get all better!"_

"_We…?"_

"_Yeah, Jen and me, of course."_

"_Jen and I, my son, you must have proper grammar if you hope to make it very far in this life." She was always bugging me about that. I was 8, not 18._

"_Jen and I, then. Happy?" _

"_Oh, very much so." She smiled._

"_I've gotta go,' kay mom." I wasn't supposed to be there._

"_Alright. Take care, okay? And don't forget Jen's birthday."_

"_Of course, Mother." I smiled, hiding my uneasiness as I slid the door shut behind me. _

"_Nurse, is my mother supposed to sound like that?"_

"My foster family decided to get away from Michigan and bring Jen and me up somewhere where we could be happy. We moved to London. It took a little more than 6 months for me to heal up properly and, by then, I was 9. I made my share of friends, but mostly I spent time with Jen. And my foster family," a strange sort of grin marred his features, it was tainted and dark.

"How I hated my foster family." My breath hitched in my shock, but he either didn't notice or didn't care. "They were nice, happy, the way my mother and father had never been, and for that, perhaps even unreasonably, I hated them. Of course, it wasn't something I showed too openly, though maybe they could see those hateful glares, I'll never know. I got perfect grades, I was something of a child prodigy actually, and I always smiled. They thought I was the perfect child, but of course, they didn't find out about the fighting. It's not something I'm proud of but I provoked more people then I can remember, most of them older then me. I always made sure I won, but that doesn't mean I left unscathed. I came home beaten many times; I was the original closet problem child." He smirked.

_I crashed to the ground again, feeling pavement against my forearms. Blood choked from my mouth._

"_Be smart. Stay down, kid." The boy was older then me by two years, and a punk by nature. He had been picking on this girl, bugging her to date him. But it wasn't really noble intention that made me stop him; I'd been looking for a fight from the start._

_I spat the blood, reveling in my own masochism and smirking at the victory I knew would come. _

_I leapt up, springing towards him again and swept my leg beneath his. He fell in his shock and my fist soared into his gut. I was a sick child, pleasured by his pain. _

"Anyway, there was this huge mirror in our living room. I was always _seeing _things in it." I gave him a raised brow.

"Seeing things, huh?"

"It's not what you think." He scowled. "Flashes mostly. Of blue light. Unnatural flashes. At first, it was just out of my peripheral vision, and then, it started becoming a bit more troublesome. I would look straight at it and see the light. Words really. I knew I wasn't going crazy, but I also knew if I told anyone they wouldn't be as confident. The mirror became my matrix and I began reading up on insane theories by scientists. Of course, this was around the same time I saw The Matrix, so I'm sure that didn't help.

"But then," His smirk faltered, "I was walking home from school when I saw him. It was bizarre; he was getting out of a car near a hotel. I followed him. I was foolish to think… I wanted everything to be normal. I wanted my father to recognize me and care again, even after leaving." I blinked in surprise, 'His father…' "But when I knocked on the door, the man I met was not my father anymore. He was just a man. He gave me a particularly sour look and when a woman I recognized as his agent asked who was at the door, he told her it was no one and slammed the door in my face. My father…" He sighed tiredly.

_There was so much hope in me at that moment, I surely thought I would burst. Finally, finally everything would be okay. My kind and gentle father, who thought the world of my sister and me, would take us back. We'd be a family again. We'd be happy again. _

_I smiled brightly as the door opened slowly. Surely, he'd take me into his arms and apologize for ever leaving, swear to never do it again. _

"_What do you want?" _

"_Father?"_

_Violet met violet, I knew those eyes. There was no mistaking this man. He was my father._

"_Sorry, you must have the wrong room." My smile faltered._

"_But father…"_

"_John? Who is it?" I knew that voice. It was Mrs. Thyler; a pretty blond woman who worked with my father. She visited on occasion when my father forgot something or had more work. She was his agent, and she was good at what she did._

"_No one, they got the wrong room." He turned from me. "Now, what was that meeting you were telling me about?" The door slammed in my face._

"The night I saw my father, I came home and found Jennifer staring at the mirror and I became terrified. You see, blood means a lot to me, and she was the last blood I had, to me at least. And then there were these arms, reaching for her and I made a grab to snatch her away. The mirror wanted Jennifer, it got me as well. She was about 3, I was about 10." He nodded, sighing.

_Light reflected off my sister's features and she giggled at the mirror, reaching out to the blue. My eyes widened in horror. No, not my sister, not my baby sister. "Jen!" I shouted. "Get away from there! She turned to me and giggled while waving. _

_Arms, long, lean, and black like shadows, extended from the mirror, glowing with an eerie light, reaching for my sister._

"_No, get away." I lunged and grabbed hold at the same time. The arms were too strong. But they would not have my sister._

"I woke up in Kumogakure; of course I didn't really have a clue where the hell I was. Jen and I ended up in an orphanage. I did a lot of digging. I could make a fair map of this world and tell you more then you ever wanted to know about its history. When I turned 12, I took 5 year old 'Yuzu' and headed out. Picked up a bingo book on the way, as well. We've had our share of adventures, but otherwise that's pretty much the whole thing. I didn't mean to make it quite this long." He admitted, finishing his tale.

"So you changed your names." I reasoned thoughtfully.

"Yes," He nodded, "Our names were too strange for this world, so I became Kai, and Jennifer became Yuzu."

"That's quite a story." I commented, unsure of how else to put it.

"It's my life."

"You know we're in 'Naruto', right?" Now I was scrabbling desperately for conversation. There was something I was supposed to say here, something comforting, something right. But I didn't know what it was. I was never good at that comforting thing. I couldn't count the times I've made Kanoke cry. I'd look back on all those situations and think of what I could have said, but even then, the words never came to me. Sympathy was not foreign to me or anything, it was just that when I put myself in their shoes, I tell them not what they want to hear nor what I'd want to hear, I tell them what I think I'd need to hear. This was usually not good.

'_Suck it up and move on.'_

"I never really watched it, but the name does ring a bell, and after a lot of digging, it sort of clicked."

"Hm," we were silent, it was dark, and I was still processing the story. "You're trusting me with a lot of information, you know…" I said quietly, it was almost uncomfortable, the level with which he trusted me.

"I know."

Silence.

"I suppose you want to hear my side of the story?" Where was I to start? How was I to finish? Aw hell, this was gonna be fun. He paused for a moment.

"Not today," he mumbled, pushing off from his tree. By the time I had any clue to process what he'd said, he was already on the move. "Come on, I'll walk ya back to Tazuna's," he motioned, walking away. I blinked in surprise.

"Y-you don't wanna hear it?" I asked, unable to hide my astonishment, while catching up with him. He smirked, putting his sunglasses back on cooly.

"Tomorrow maybe, if your story is half as long as mine, it'll be a while and I really shouldn't leave Yuzu alone. She has a record for trouble."

"Hm." I gave a sly grin, slipping all too easily back into my element, "Is that your way of telling me you want to see me tomorrow?"

"Maybe," he replied.

/Bubble-chan, Bubble-chan! This yummy piece of mozoku knows how to play our game!/ Inner me exclaimed excitedly.

"Well, what if I don't wanna see you tomorrow?" I teased, nearly skipping at his side.

"Too bad. I know where Tazuna lives."

"You're stalking me now?"

"If that's what it takes."

"Mm, confidence." I grinned, hooking my arm through his and batting my eyelashes comically. "I find that incredibly sexy in a man."

"Is that so?" he laughed.

"Oh, it is so. In fact, it's so so it's making my head hurt." I stated.

"Ah, logic. I find that incredibly attractive in a woman," he purred deeply, hooking our arms tighter. I laughed, knowing what I had said didn't make any sense, and took the game further.

"So do I." He faltered for a moment, not sure whether to take my words to heart or not. In the end, he just shook it off.

"You're incredibly strange," he said.

"I tend to have that effect on people," I hummed slyly.

"Do you recognize anything yet?" He asked. I blinked and looked around.

"Um, that tree kinda looks familiar," I said. He nodded before I added, "Kinda like the one we just passed and all the others before that."

"Seriously?"

"They're trees, Kai. You're asking me if I can tell a clearing I've been to like, once, from the one we just passed, you can't honestly expect me to be good at that."

"Get lost easily?" he snickered.

"No no no, not at all! I'm a tad directionally challenged, but I always make it back, right?"

"I wouldn't know." I fell silent. That comment made me realize something. I met this boy only a couple hours ago and already, I feel lax in his presence. He had not been given a nickname, he had not been kept at a distance, I had my arm linked with his, and though I knew all about his life, he hardly knew my name. He was giving me an unbelievable amount of trust, and at first, it had made me uncomfortable and confused. I had done this before, sure, but it had always been under the phrase, 'keep your friends close and your enemies closer.' But now I realized, I was trusting him far more then many and far faster then any. Why?

"Why do you trust me so much?" I asked suddenly.

"Hm," he seemed thoughtful. "I dunno. Maybe the same reason you seem to trust me so much."

"You think I'm sexy?" He anime fell, but took me with him as we were still linked. Pressed against him I gave a wicked smile. "Pathetic, don't you think?" I teased, staring down at him. "Clearly, I'm going to be on top." I snickered crudely. This was child's play for me, more comfortable then uncomfortable, but I got up just the same and offered my hand in help. "Silly little boy, I don't trust you," I scoffed. And I didn't, not completely anyway, just more then I'd like.

"Alright, chica, whatever you say."

"Damn right," I muttered. "OH! I recognize that!" I said, pointing and hopping dramatically while having my hands on his shoulder. His head lolled to the side as I jerked him left and right in my excitement.

"You should, it is Tazuna's house, after all," he deadpanned.

"Hm, how late is it? The lights are all off…" I shook my head, crazy ninjas.

"Alas, I must leave you now," he sighed as we reached the front doors. "Parting is such sweet sorrow."

"I hate Shakespeare," I stated.

"Why?"

"You ever read, 'The Taming of the Shrew?'" He shook his head. "Then you cannot know my pain," I said, dramatically slipping past him and facing him at a very close proximity. "There's just one thing I gotta know." He didn't speak and in the dark, he wore an expression that I did not see. "What is your real name?" The words were hardly above a whisper.

"Now, why would you need to know something like that?" he breathed.

"You have Xellos's eyes, a cute baby sister, you can keep up with my crude humor, and you know quotes from a dimension not like this. What is the true name of the boy who's stuck in the same world as I, I wonder?" He smirked, peering at me over his glasses and brought up a hand in a reprimanding fashion.

"Now that is a secret." I gave him a crooked sort of smile. "Heh, goodnight chica, I look forward to your story," he said, backing away, smiling mischievously.

"Assuming, of course, I see you tomorrow, you stalker," I laughed quietly. "Goodnight, sexy," I winked. There was that expression again, the one I could not see, but I was already in the house. I closed the door and walked about two steps before it happened.

GRRRRUUUUUUMMMBLE.

"Aha, I'm so hungry," I cried pathetically, putting a hand on my stomach. "Damn you, Kai, you smexy mozuku, you made me miss dinner." I whimpered, shuffling weakly over to the fridge. "There's… there's nothing left!" I would have screamed had people not been sleeping. How dare they not leave anything for me!?!?! Me? I, who had slept through dinner the previous night? I, who had wasted my breakfast decorating the Uchiha's face! I, who had so kindly given my lunch time apple to my favorite little Summers Storm! I, who was gonna give them so much hell in the morning, they won't be wouldn't be able to SPEAK from lack of movement. A brief picture of Sasuke and Naruto wolfing down food as though they'd never eaten before came to mind and my eyebrow twitched in annoyance. 'Those bastards.'

The house was dark but I knew the relative direction of my room. So, shuffling over wooden floors and muttering darkly to myself, I gave up any hopes for food. "Those bastards eating all that food and then barfing it back up again. How dare they? But we'll make them pay, won't we, my precious. Yes, yes, tomorrow, dead men, we want them to beg for mercy. Deny us our food, will they, precious? Teach them a thing or two, yes? Yes? Oh good idea, quiet, or they'll hear. Don't want them to know our plan, do we, precious? No, no, best not to spoil the surprise." I chuckled evilly and slid the door of my shared room open. "Screw food." I muttered, discarding my jacket in some unknown corner and flopping unceremoniously on the bed. In grogginess, hunger, and what was possibly, budding insanity, I failed to hear Sakura's very awake voice say. "Night, Yukari." And all was blissfully dark.

-------------------------------------------------Dream---------------------------------------------------

_Don't hate me because I'm beautiful  
Fame, fame, I love my Calvin's  
Oh_

_Pink._

_The room swirled with pink lights as the Naruto cast entered the floor. Excuse me, I mean the future Naruto boys cast. And Shikamaru was the first to step forward in what I would soon realize to be a quite scarring dream._

_And that's when the shirt came off._

_I'm too sexy for my shirt  
Too sexy for my shirt  
So sexy it hurts_

_They all did a little dance and Shika, who was too lazy to flex, simply grinned and went back to the crowed, replaced by Shino._

_And there was posing._

_And I'm too sexy for Milan  
Milan, New York, and Japan_

_Shino faded back into the line, only to be replaced by Neji. And there was smexiness._

_I'm too sexy for your party  
Too sexy for your party  
No way I'm disco dancing_

_And there was disco dancing. And more bizarreness._

_Sasuke came out next flipping his bangs to the side and walking forward like a model._

_I'm a model  
Ya know what I mean  
And I do my little turn on the catwalk  
Yeah on the catwalk  
On the catwalk, yeah, I do my little turn on the catwalk_

_He faced me and gave a very un-Sasuke-like wink._

_And I couldn't stop laughing._

_Don't hate me  
I'm just like you but better looking  
Don't hate me, please_

_Gaara stepped in front of Sasuke._

_And there was hotness._

_I'm too sexy for my love  
Too sexy for my love  
Too sexy to love_

I can love

_And there was drool, from me, of course. Haha._

_And so Sai stepped forward…_

_And sang in monotone._

_And I'm too sexy for my hat  
Too sexy for my hat  
Whatcha think about that?_

_I sweat dropped._

_That's when Itachi came out and took his brother's part._

_I'm a model  
You know what I mean  
And I do my little turn on the catwalk  
Yeah, on the catwalk  
On the catwalk, yeah  
I shake my little toosh on the catwalk_

_It was disturbing, it was bizarre, it was... kinda hot. I need help._

_Too sexy for my  
Too sexy for my  
Too sexy for my_

_Itachi ran his hand through his hair, which was being blown by a wind I apparently couldn't feel, then again, it was getting pretty hot in here. XD_

_Stepping out of the line, Sasuke joined his brother on the catwalk. And both rather sexy looking brothers did their little turns on the catwalk._

_And walking right in the middle of them, grinning broadly in a plaid miniskirt and black tank, came Kanoke._

_'Cause I'm a model ya know what I mean  
And I do my little turn on the catwalk  
Yeah on the catwalk  
Yeah on the catwalk  
I shake my little toosh on the catwalk_

_Kanoke's ass was in my face only moments before her inner klutz woke up and sent her tumbling down onto me._

_I wanted to ask her what the fuck was going on. I wanted to ask her why the fuck Naruto people where dancing in front of me like a bunch of idiots. I wanted to ask her why the fuck she was dancing like an idiot._

_She emerged, rubbing her head with the palm of her hand and laughing ecstatically. I managed two syllables._

"_The fuck!?!?"_

_Kiba stepped out with Akamaru looking rather grown at his side._

_I'm too sexy for my dog  
Too sexy for my dog  
Poor bow-wow-wog  
(Akamaru barks twice)_

_Kanoke clapped and, much to my bewilderment, did the dog pound call._

_And then there was Kakashi._

_I'm too sexy for my mask  
too sexy for my mask  
I think that it should leave me_

_Kakashi's hand came up and curved over the masked edge. My questions became priority number two, in favor of this, and Kanoke seemed to agree. We both leaned in eagerly, getting a close up. This was it!  
__  
And I'm too sexy for this song!_

------------------------------------------------------End---------------------------------------

I sat up quickly. It took me about 30 seconds to remember where I was, another 10 to realize it had all just been a dream and about 5 more for my eyes to widen in absolute horror. "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

There was a crash in the kitchen and birds fled before my terror.

Surely, I was insane.

My fear mutated into a starvation-induced fury that pushed me into the hallway. Screw being tactful, I hardly thought to change my clothes. I was officially going insane, and whose fault was it? Kai's, of course. That's right I'm blaming the entire thing on him. But rightfully so, or so I figured.

I swung into the kitchen, radiating so much killing intent Sasuke was actually standing up in alarm. I suppose Kakashi knew it was me. If I'd been in a right state of mind, I suppose I'd care that Naruto was strangely absent. Remember that somewhere he was lying in the woods passed out from chakra exertion. But really, I had just spotted the pancakes by my seat. And pancakes had never looked so good before.

Heaven was the first fork full. Amazing was the next. Only after I'd finished my first pancake did I stop for a moment to put syrup on the next. And then the third after that.

I sighed, chewing on a toothpick that came out of absolutely nowhere and sitting back in my seat. "Ah! That was amazing, Tazuni-san. I feel like a beached whale, I couldn't possibly eat another bite!"

"I-I'm glad you liked it." I grinned up at her.

"Yukari, you must have been really hungry," Sakura said, yawning and saying her good mornings.

"Ah." I nodded at Sakura in response; suddenly even she seemed less annoying. "I missed dinner last night, after all." I smiled catlike, closing my eyes and resting my head on the table. "But it's all good now and no one has to die."

"That's good to hear," Kakashi said cheerfully.

"Naruto's not here." I cracked an eye open to pay closer attention. "It looks like he was out all night again," Tazuna continued.

"He's out climbing trees in the dark. He could be dead by now." I narrowed both eyes at Sakura, her voice quickly gaining that thing about it that I found most annoying. "You know, from using up too much of his chakra."

"Well, I certainly hope he's okay, a child spending the night in the woods alone," Tazuna replied.

"There's nothing to worry about. Naruto's a kid, but he's also a full-fledged ninja. He can handle himself," Kakashi answered in a lax way. I had to agree.

"Sakura's right, Naruto's such a loser, he's probably lying out there dead somewhere," Sasuke commented, that frigid bastard.

"Sasuke?"

"I'm going for a walk." I turned in interest to watch the Uchiha walk away.

"Ah, but we just started eating!" Sakura protested and I stood before the door shut. "Yukari?"

"I'm going out too. Have more faith in Kit. He saved your sorry ass out there in the fight against Zabuza, in fact, he saved all of our sorry asses, so think twice before you go around with your prissy little attitude," I scoffed, sliding the chair back with more force than necessary.

"Naruto wouldn't have been able to do anything without Sasuke, it's Sasuke who saved us, Yukari!"

/Of course she rises to defend her prince./

"You know, I wasn't even gonna do a speech, I was just gonna leave it at that and go out, but you just had to open your damn mouth, didn't you? Pinky, learn how to just shut up, will you? I'm sick an tired of hearing about your 'oh so great prince.' Don't talk of things even you know you don't understand. You hide behind your philosophies, that Kit can't possibly be better then Ice Cube. You wallow in your ideals that even you are above him. Pinky, you fool, you see things through Sasuke colored glasses and you never take them off. One day reality's gonna hit you hard and it's gonna hurt like a son of bitch. But then you'll see. Till that day, keep your fruity little glasses and your prissy little comments to yourself. Just fawn over the Uchiha like a good little girl and care for your looks more then your training. I may be a bit of a bitch, but I'll be damned if I'm not a konichi, and a half decent one at that." I leaned closer toward her, capturing her eyes with mine in a manipulative fashion. "I just want you to know, Haruno, that I will _never _take you seriously as long as those glasses and those ideals stay on."

And I left, Summers Storm nowhere in sight and several gazes at my back. I flung open the door and made sure to slam it behind me when I left.

"That was quite a speech." I kept walking.

"Shouldn't you be gone already?" Sasuke was quite for a moment.

"Why did you do that?" he asked. "Why do you always do that?"

"Do what?" He'd better clarify or he's gonna get a speech too.

"Stand up for Naruto, why do you always stand up for that loser?" I threw him a disbelieving look.

"Don't tell me you're wearing a pair of your glasses too!?" he was quite. "Christ, Uchiha! Do not make me repeat myself. I don't just stand up for Orangeman, I stand up for whatever the hell I can, but I'm sick and tired of hearing put down speeches about poor little Kit when, since the day I met him, I've seen nothing but good in the boy."

…

"So, you're not saying my name anymore?"

I froze.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"No no no no no!! You don't get it! The man couldn't possibly hear the noise, that man was deaf, see?"

"So he felt the vibrations in the ground?"

"No! Jeez, it doesn't say, 'he felt the vibrations in the ground,' it says 'a deaf policeman heard the noise.'"

"So why doesn't it just change the wording?" he tried.

"Because in a nonsensical story. The writer wrote it so it wouldn't make sense. It was on purpose." I explained.

"That makes no sense." Sasuke scoffed.

"By George, I think he's got it!" About flipping time too.

"Who's George?" Sasuke asked quite seriously. I sweat dropped.

"Yo momma." I muttered.

"Excuse me?"

"Eheh," I laughed nervously. I didn't think he'd heard me! Fuck. "Oh," I muttered, looking up. There was someone coming our way. A guy in drag. Haha. Nah I'm only joshing. It was Haku, Zabuza's little helper. You may take a moment to picture him in an elf costume, I know I just did.

(Moment)

He didn't even look at us, but I smirked and raised my hand. "Hey," I greeted.

"Oh hello," he responded politely. "Have a nice day."

"Ya, see ya round, Haku!" There was a pause in Haku's step, but it was brief, barely noticeable.

"You know that guy?" Sasuke asked, glancing back at the boy suspiciously.

"We've met before."

"You call him by his name," Sasuke noted.

"Don't even go there, Ice Cube, we've already had this conversation," I said and ran forward to meet Naruto.

"Whoa I've seen a lot of weird things in my life before, but this one takes the cake," Naruto mumbled. I threw my arms around him and he cried out in surprise.

"Kit, you idiot, I was worried. You didn't come home and people started talking about how someone can die from chakra loss!" I said dramatically.

"Y-You were worried about me Angel-chan?" he replied quietly.

"No shit, Sherlock!" I said, detaching myself and settling on my heels. "But since you were with Haku, I know that you're all right!" I said cutely.

THWACK.

Sasuke's fist and Naruto's head.

"Ow! Hey what did you do that for!? Cut it out!"

"Hey twerp. Did you just forget about breakfast? You're such a loser," Sasuke scoffed.

"Oh come on Ice Cube, don't be like that!" I whined standing and tugging childishly against his arm. "We came looking for you because we were so worried!" I grinned, forcing laughter down with difficulty.

"I believe that from you, Angel, but not from a jerk like Sasuke," Naruto admitted.

"Ah, but it's true!" I exclaimed.

"No it's not."

"Don't be so modest, Uchiha! The truth is that beneath his cold exterior, this Ice Cube has a heart of gold. He like a Popsicle with a different flavor on the inside. He's a polysicle!" (note: poly-many, it's supposed to be that way.  )

"What the hell are you talking about?" Sasuke deadpanned.

I stopped for a moment in dawning comprehension.

Oh… My… God…

"You're a Creamsicle!" I squealed in delight. Oh, this was too perfect. "New nickname!" I clapped spinning cheerily.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I branched off from Sasuke and Naruto in hopes to get some form of work done, training wise. You know, prepare for the fight at the bridge. But not too far from the house, oh no, I'd never find my way. Secretly, Kai was right, I did get lost easily.

But there had been something I really wanted to try. Something I needed to make sure I had perfected if I even hoped to stand a chance against Haku. Course, I'm not gonna tell you, it's a secret. You're so gonna hate that line by the end of this story.

So maybe an hour and a half later there I was; covered in a nice layer of sweat and standing in a very ready position. And quite suddenly, I noticed I was not alone. The presence was small, new, and foreign to me. But I knew who it was. "If it is comfort you seek, boy, I am the wrong person to assist you. I'm very bad at it, you see, and have pretty much no desire to improve," I said wearily. It was not entirely true; it would have been nice if I'd known what to say to Kai last night.

"Comfort? Yeah right, like I'd look for comfort from someone like you! Everything you stupid ninjas do, no matter how hard you train, is just gonna get you killed," I heard him sneer from the brush to my left.

"Indeed," I turned my head very slightly to make eye contact and raised an amused eyebrow. I registered that this was the first time I'd spoken to Inari and, though he'd heard my speech this morning, I had yet to make a truly good first impression. You see, I have this thing where I simply must make a good first impression on everyone. Except Sasuke apparently.

'Ashen Flame' pulsed with my chakra and I gave three impressively fast swings. The chakra detached, elongating and powering my blade as splinters and chunks of wood flew and crashed into the ground, raising a cloud of dust in their wake and demolishing the targeted tree.

"We all die eventually, Geki. We live the lives we're given and then we die, whether or not we choose to make a difference is entirely up to us."

"W-what the heck is that supposed to mean?" he growled, but I could sense his awe.

"It means whatever you want it to mean, Geki." I sighed, sheathing the blade. I may have looked wonderfully composed, but once this brat was out of sight I knew I'd collapse.

"It could mean that some people are abandoned, that some people have never known love or kindness, that some people are hated for being only what they are, that some people are stripped from everything they love in moments," I said darkly. The boy did not interrupt me, though I don't think I gave him much opportunity. "It could mean that somewhere there is a boy, who has never known love. He has been shunned, hated, his father wishes his death, his mother has died long ago and his uncle whom he so dearly loved tried to assassinate him. Or that somewhere there is a girl who has only known the shadow of her sister and the pain of failure. Her father has deemed her unworthy of her name when all she wants is to please him. Or maybe that somewhere there is a boy, he was young when the brother he adored and loved more then anything in this world massacred his entire family. He is cold, he is alone, and he strives for revenge, to kill his own brother. Tell me, boy, what kind of lives are these?" He didn't answer. I'm glad. It would have been tactless to do so.

I turned to leave, pulling a mystic act I worked so hard to obtain. So basically, inside I was laughing really hard. This is the kinda stuff they do in Naruto though, right? Spew cheesy lines and talk about the past to make people change their ways. I could be the most perfect anime character yet. "And then there's him…" I started again. "A boy without love who doesn't gripe or cry, who doesn't complain when he has every right. People shun him for something that is not his fault. Yet he's not cold, he's not shy or cruel, he's probably the bravest, most sincere person I have ever met, and we could all learn something from him." I walked away, hooking my arms behind my head neatly.

"Of course these are just what it 'could' mean. It could mean nothing at all. After all, what do I know? I'm just gonna get myself killed right?" There was silence and I took the chance to retreat. "Catch ya later, Geki, gotta go make my surprise appearance at dinner. You know, prove to the world I'm not anti-social or whatever." He didn't stop me, thank god. I made it fifty meters until I found the most comfortable looking tree and positively collapsed against it.

"Damn, I hope I don't screw this up," I sighed, dragging a hand over my face. It came back covered sweat. "Bloody hell," I laughed, "I'm exhausted."

No matter how hard I tried, I always had serious difficulty practicing fire based techniques. It was like a right-handed person suddenly trying to go lefty. No matter what I told myself, I was NOT ambidextrous. In training or in writing. Fuck, it would be a miracle if I could catch left handed. I could block certainly but somehow that was just… easier. More practice, I guess.

"Fuuuuuuuuuck," I sighed. And today hadn't been any different, there was no way I was gonna be able to use that technique against Haku. I'd known it was a possibility, but I'd hoped… "Looks like I'm stuck with plan B," I acknowledged grudgingly.

I sat for another moment trying to mentally convince myself to get up and go to Tazuna's. "Move," I said to myself. Nothing happened. "Get up and move," I said again. Nothing. "Fuck." I rolled my shoulders back. "You WILL get up off your lazy ass, go to Tazuna's house, and eat dinner without making yourself look like a pansy in front of your teammates! You WILL go NOW!" And I got up. Me, my own motivator. And I started walking. Heh, works like a charm.

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It wasn't long before I found myself in the town, which coincidentally proved I'd been going the wrong way this entire time. I'm sure I looked like hell, but the sad truth would be that I'd blend in well with the rest of the people. Sad indeed.

Now usually, I don't like asking for directions. Hate it actually. I'm like one of those husbands in the car with their wife completely lost and she keeps saying, pull over, and ask for directions, but he won't even admit that they're lost. Yeah, I'm that guy.

Problem was, all these people looked like they'd either cop a feel or pickpocket me the first chance they got. So finally, I decided to ask this one girl. She was just exiting the shop I'd purchased my apple from the other day. She was blond with bouncy curls, maybe two years my senior. She held herself confidentially and it made me believe that if she did indeed try to steal from me, she wouldn't be sneaky about it. I could take her if it came to that.

"Excuse me," I started awkwardly and with obvious ill practice.

"Hm?" She turned and I came face to face with the most unrealistic green eyes I've ever seen. For a moment, I was speechless. "Nina!" she announced, giving me a name distinctly not my own and greeting me with a full-blown kiss on the lips.

…

/Wait, WHAT!?!?/

Let's repeat that, shall we?

**She **Kissed** Me**

She pulled away when I didn't respond. How was I supposed to respond to that?!? It wasn't exactly my first kiss but, hell to naw, that's just not fair. There was no warning! Tanner had been my first kiss, another accident actually, otherwise my virgin lips were violated! Her eyes were glazed over. With what? I didn't particularly want to know. "Mhm, you're not Nina," she said decisively.

"Nope, I'd be Yukari." I couldn't have said something cool or something smart. I was completely confused and it was affecting my cool factor. This is bad.

"Yu-ka-ri." She tasted the word on her lips and let a sly smile creep over her face. "You taste like strawberries, Yukari-san. Strawberries and something sweet that I've never tasted before." Her gaze was heavy lidded her tone dropping an octave. "It's delicious."

"Uh, thanks, I guess…" And quite suddenly, I wished I'd asked a pickpocket for directions.

"I'm Clare."

And something clicked.

_But Clare is nice enough I guess, it just took us some getting some too." I blinked stupidly at him._

"_Clare?"_

"_Yeah, she and my daughter are seeing each other apparently."_

"Erm, right." It was at this moment that I realized was standing in front of a certified lesbian, with my back facing a building. Way to go, Yukari. "Nice to meet you. You wouldn't happen to know the way to Tazuna's house, would you?" I spoke fast and she seemed disappointed that directions were all I wanted from her.

"Everyone knows where Tazuna lives; it's where Kaiza was staying, after all," she said matter-of-factly. "Are you in a hurry? I'll treat you to dinner, if you like."

"Um, that's okay, they're expecting me, and I really shouldn't dawdle." It was a lie, a well needed lie.

"How about some ice cream?" I faltered for a moment my eyes widening and my inner chibi taking over.

"Ice cream? … I… I really shouldn't." I found myself unable to give a proper excuse why. Clare made me think of a leopard and I was her gazelle, I'd never really felt that way before, it was uncomfortable. But this WAS ice cream after all.

"Come on, then." She slid her arm around my waist and led me to an ice cream stand.

Cookies 'n Cream in this world is just as delicious as it is in my own world. Clare ordered a strawberry cone and either ate with her eyes closed or looked at me. This made me highly uneasy.

"So Yukari-san, you're a ninja, then?" she said.

It took a great deal of my will power to tell her that formalities were not necessary. I only hope she didn't take it the wrong way. "Um, yeah, from Konoha. We're here protecting Tazuna."

"My, how exciting. You must get a lot of action out there."

"I guess," I admitted, more than happy to be on a topic I could deal with.

"But that's so dangerous."

"I like the danger." And now I was just talking for the sake of talking. "The blood, the tears. Progress for the sake for progress. Knowing I'm doing something worth doing." Her eyes widened. "The sweat, the power," I curled my tongue over the tip of the ice cream. "The heat, the adrenaline rush." I stopped abruptly realizing that Clare had that look in her eyes again and was leaning forward.

"Why'd you stop?"

I sweat dropped, thinking back on what I'd said and regretting it whole-heartedly. "I think you should know, Clare, I'm not gay."

"That's okay," she breathed and I almost laughed. "Bi?"

"Nope."

"You can't be straight!" she exclaimed. I nodded and she gasped, "You don't know what you're missing!" There was a new strain in her voice. "Someone that tastes as good as you, Yukari-chan," She paused to lick ice cream off my cheek. I don't even know how it got there. "Shouldn't limit herself so."

She was too close again, invading my valued bubble.

"Don't you have a girlfriend?" I asked abruptly. She tilted her head to the side.

"You mean Nina? Is that why you're so reluctant?" She laughed. "I helped Nina come out with her parents, but there's no other real relationship there beyond friends."

"How do you know I don't have a boyfriend?"

"You can have a boyfriend," she said. "I don't mind."

I sweat dropped.

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Sakura was most certainly not the first person I had wanted to see upon walking into Tazuna's house. But what ya gonna do, ya know?

I nodded curtly to her position at the table in a polite manner and sat across from her with my plate. Onigri. Yum. I wasn't even hungry, nor was I eager to wash the taste of Cookies 'n Cream out of my mouth. But I ate anyway. It was a quiet dinner mostly, one with me ignoring Sakura's continued stares. If she wanted to talk about this morning, she'd have to approach me, as always. Until then I refused to acknowledge her. However, when she finally did speak, I was surprised. For what she wanted to talk about had nothing to do with this morning's confrontation. And I thought bitterly for a moment about the possibility that she'd forgotten all about my fabulous speech.

"So Yukari," she started sweetly. "Your 'friend' dropped by." I narrowed my eyes as she stressed the word 'friend.'

"You're gonna have to be a little more specific about this 'friend' of mine. You see, contrary to popular belief, I do have more then one," I bit out, perhaps harsher than necessary. But she seemingly didn't notice.

"Your 'male' friend." she continued.

I rolled my eyes. "Again, I do have more then one."

"Your 'charming,' 'handsome', 'male' friend!" she sang.

I twitched. "Oh! That male friend! I know just the one!" Sarcasm threaded my words in a tight stream of annoyance. And that's when Kakashi walked in and saved the day!

"Oh Yukari, your friend Kai dropped by."

"Oh sweet lord in heaven. Thank god. I thought I was gonna kill Pinky for a minute there," I commented in exasperation.

"Glad I could help," he said simply, taking the seat next to me, probably didn't have a clue what I was talking about. Like he cared, he had Icha Icha Paradise covering his face.

"Kakashi-sensei!" Sakura complained.

"And why, pray tell, couldn't you have just told me that?" I asked Sakura.

"Weeeell, I wanted to ask you when you were gonna tell me about your boyfriend."

I blinked once, and then twitched. Then I spit out my onigri. 'What!?' I thought. "What!?"

"I've always wondered why you weren't interested in Sasuke, and now I know. You have Kai, goodness. I get it completely. How'd you hook him? You have to tell me so I can use it on Sasuke."

"Haruno, did Kai 'tell' you I was going out with him?" I asked.

"Well no, but I could just tell, you know. You two would be such a great couple after all, it makes perfect sense, blah blah blah blah blah…"

'Sasuke colored glasses,' I reasoned, apparently they applied here as well. 'Breathe, Yukari, breathe.'

/hahahahaahaha!/

'Shut up.'

/…… heehee……./

"Pinky, I'm not dating Kai, end of discussion." I took a swig of milk and drained my cup in one go, placing it on the table just as Tazuna settled next to Pinky.

"Hey, you look like hell." Ah, Tazuna, did I ever tell you how much I dislike you?

"Gee, thanks." I grumbled taking the offered milk refill from Tsunami, whom I liked a considerable amount more then her father.

"I'm worried about Sasuke," Sakura glanced at me, "and Naruto," she continued. "I know they're both training, but they've been out there an awful long time."

"I'm sure they're fine, Sakura," Kakashi answered.

"Yeah, but now they're both late, I wouldn't have expected that from Sasuke…" she trailed off.

Recognizing the line, I was aware a moment before everyone else that Sasuke and Naruto had, in fact, returned. Though perhaps not, it makes sense that Kakashi would sense their presence. And as I turned my head and examined them, for once, I was forced to agree with Tazuna, that drunk jerk.

"What have you been up to? You look like something the cat dragged in." And my, doesn't he just have a way with words? Naruto and Sasuke entered the house, tattered and worn, with Naruto leaning heavily against his teammate for support. They looked like hell.

"We both made it," Naruto gritted out through a grin, "to the top!"

"Good," Kakashi started. "Now we move on. Starting tomorrow, you're both going to be bodyguards for Tazuna."

"Alright!" Naruto cheered, putting so much enthusiasm in his exhaustion that it sent him and Sasuke falling backwards.

Then something new happened. They did not fall to the ground, Sasuke did not call Naruto a moron, and our table did not laugh. Instead, both boys were caught, and I found myself face to face with someone whose presence I surely should have recognized.

"Well now, what have we here?" the boy started. "You two meet up for a quickie in the forest and now the blond can't walk?"

My eye twitched. "Who the hell are you?" Sasuke snapped on his feet in a flash.

"You…" My tone was low, the air thick around me, killing intent boiling raw beneath my surface.

"Ah, Yukari-chan!" Kai greeted enthusiastically, forgetting that he was supporting Naruto and instead letting the boy fall flat on his ass.

"You!" A split second passed and I was already in front of him gripping his collar and shaking him in a threatening manner. "You! This is all your fault, you smexy mozoku! You made me miss dinner and then I had weird dreams, you're the root to my insanity of two days without food. I could have gotten back in time for dinner last night but did I? NO! Thanks to you I'm going stark raving loony here and all you have to say is 'Ah, Yukari-chan!?!?' Give me one good reason why I shouldn't rip your head off right now!?" I growled.

He seemed to think for a moment before coming upon his idea. Then he leaned forward and kissed my cheek. "Because I'm sexy." I anime fell.

"T-that can only get you so far in life!" I protested, using a wall to support myself.

"Alright, Lina!" he announced. He leaned forward again and kissed my other cheek. "I apologize." I could feel myself turn red, it's been a very long time since I'd blushed or sputtered, and here I was doing both.

"Y-You,"

"Lina?" I heard Sakura question. I said the first thing that came to my mind.

"It's my middle name." Of course most Japanese people don't have middle names but to hell with it. "My parents had trouble naming me so, yeah, it's my middle name."

Kai grinned cheekily at my lie and wrapped his arm around my waist in a way that reminded me way to much of Clare.

'Too close!' I was thinking. 'Waaaaay too close!'

"Are you going to introduce me to your friends, Yukari-chan?"

"Actually, I was hoping they'd never be unfortunate enough to meet you," I said, trying not to seem awkward, it was working much to my relief. Remind me to strangle Kai for this later.

"Your words wound me," he faked.

"You're Kai, right?" Sakura interrupted, coming forth with an extended hand.

"Ah! You're that charming young lady who answered the door earlier today, are you not?" I took that moment to slip out of Kai's arms and snicker quietly.

"Look out, Uchiha, if you're not careful, you might lose another fan," I laughed.

"Tch, like I care." The harshness of his sentence threw me off guard for a moment.

"Jeez, what crawled up your ass and died?" He was pissed; a blind person could feel it. "If you really don't like him flirting with Pinky, then speak up. Don't put me through your verbal meat cutter cuz of your own personal issues."

"I don't care about that!" he growled. There was a startling truth in his words that also threw me off, but hell, it could be a number of things with Sasuke Uchiha. He didn't sense Kai's presence, he realized Kai's hotter then him, yada yada yada. The world will never know that kind of shit.

"So, how long have you known Yukari, Kai-san?" Sakura asked.

"Just Kai is fine, formalities make my skin crawl." He laughed and Sakura blushed heavily. "Yukari and I? We go way back, ne, Yukari-chan?" I managed to hide my shock beneath a raised eyebrow, he's gonna have some explaining to do later, though. "I remember the good ol' days with little Yukari-chan running around and getting lost. Good ol' directionally challenged Yukari-chan!"

I twitched heavily, seizure-like, actually. "Kai!"

Sasuke's head snapped in my direction. I had said Kai's name, and he wasn't happy about it.

"You're one to talk!" I started angrily. "If I remember correctly, you're the reason I got lost so often, dragging me off on wild goose chases!" I seethed.

"And you beat me up right afterwards, ne?" Kai smiled softly, walking over to me and, for the third time like two minutes, I was again thrown off guard. "Do you ever wish you could go back?"

There was a dangerous element to his question; he wanted to know if I wanted to go home, back to the real world. It was well done, strategically, I had to answer since we were being watched, but he had limited my answer and how well I could explain it.

"Not really," I said with a wisp of nostalgia. "There's nothing for me back there."

"Nothing." His brow furrowed. Perhaps I had lied. Perhaps I did miss actually seeing Kanoke, or even Tanner. Perhaps I missed being able to read Anne Rice, or get on my computer and read fan fiction. Perhaps I did miss technology as a whole; the luxuries of life in the 21st century.

"I can't go back even if I wanted to. So, what's it matter?" I muttered.

"But if you could go back, would you?" he asked again.

If I could go back now… would I kill my father before he could kill Maya?

"_MAYA! What are you doing! Go back to bed!" But she looked at me like I was crazy._

"_What's going on!? Why is father acting so? Daddy could have killed you!" she sobbed, tears falling from pale blue eyes, so unlike mine. I felt my heart soften, it was impossible to be sadistic with her around._

Yes, yes I would.

"Would you?" I shot back.

"Absolutely not." I blinked at his fast answer. "Because I'm really happy here."

I smiled a very small smile and bent over to pick up Naruto who had quite possibly fallen asleep on the floor. "Look what you've done Kai, poor Orangeman must've hit the ground hard."

"I'm okay, Angel-chan," Naruto mumbled, slumping his way to a chair at the table.

The table was extremely crowded with Kai's arrival. Hell, it was kinda crowded with my arrival. And despite Kai's oh so generous offer to let me sit on his lap, I politely declined. Instead, I sat between Kai and Kakashi, Naruto and Sakura shared the edge of the table, Tazuna at the other end, and Inari and a really pissed off Sasuke at the other.

"I've been meaning to ask you before now, but I hadn't got the chance," Tazuna began. "Why did you stay and protect me even after you found out I'd lied to bring you here?"

I smiled, leaning on my elbows over the table in a content manner, completely ready to absorb the quote I already memorized.

"Those who stray from the path of justice have no courage. But under the wing of a strong leader, cowardice cannot survive," Kakashi quoted and I smiled.

"The first Hokage said it," I said.

"Correct, Yukari. You are good at this game."

"Why…" Inari mumbled and I burrowed my head in my hands in anticipation. "All this stupid training is just a waste of time! Gato's got a whole army and they'll beat you down and destroy you! These cool things you all say, they don't mean anything! No matter what you do! The strong always win and the weak always lose!" Inaris voice cracked in his throat, tears pricking the corners of his eyes.

"Just speak for yourself," Naruto growled. "It won't be like that for me, you got that?"

"Why don't you just shut up!?" Inari was crying. "Just looking at you makes me sick. You don't know anything about this country, you're just butting in! Always laughing and playing around! You don't know what it's like to suffer and be treated like dirt!"

There was a short silence, hardly a break at all, but it was there, plain to me as the shadow that'd fallen over Naruto's face. "Listen to yourself whining and complaining like some sorry little victim," Naruto shot. "You can whimper all day for all I care, you're nothing but a coward!"

"Naruto! You went too far." Stupid Pinky.

Naruto got up and stalked off.

"We all die eventually, Geki," I said again and he didn't turn to me. "We live the lives we're given and then we die, whether or not we choose to make a difference is entirely up to us." Inari sobbed and disappeared around the corner. I sighed. That boy. He'll learn.

"I feel like I've witnessed something special." Kai muttered to me and I nodded.

"Soon," I whispered. "Through blood, and tears, sweat, adrenaline, heat, soon, we'll show him, that there are heroes in this world.

"Heh, you've got that corny anime character thing down, I see," Kai chuckled.

"You think?" I asked. "Maybe there's hope for me yet."

A/N: So, so tell me what you thought. It was a realllly long chapter and I know it wasn't really that funny but I had to cram a lot of crap into it since the next chapter is the fight at the bridge. I know you're all anticipating that one, ne? We will see more of Clare, cuz I like screwing with Yukari and of course Kai who I hope you all got attached to in this chapter, cuz I plan to keep him around as well. The dream? I may have been on crack at the time. Nah, I'm just kidding. My friend Jon got it stuck in my head and I've been singing it ever since. Woe is me, says I. So I thought I'd get it stuck in all your guys' heads as well! I'm such a nice person! Haha. Any-la-who, I know only a fourth of you are gonna even read this, so I'll cut it short, shall I. Next time, fighting, tears, blood, sweat, heat, bad puns, cracks at Sasuke's sexual preference cuz I can, and so much more, plus the fight at the bridge, and a SURPRISE visit from Kanoke! Be ready! Next time in Chapter 10 **Passion and Fire. **PLEASE REVIEW!


	11. Passion and Fire

**A/N: **I know, I know, I know, it's been forever I'm SO Sorry. I really appreciate that you guys haven't abandoned me after all, I'm glad you like the story enough to come back. I so sorry that it took me so long to update, really I am. You see I've been grounded and my mother unhooked my computer, I pretty much had to retype this entire chapter during my study hall period. I am however happy to announce that I just got this back from my beta so it's been polished and everything!__MY GOD IT'S GOOD TO BE BACK!

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Naruto, I do own Kai though. He's all mine, yum. :)

**Chapter 10 **

**Passion and Fire **

**(It was as if a piece of me had awoken… the passion that had been robbed from my eyes, I'd stolen it back. Never before had I felt so utterly powerful.) **

Kanoke once said to me, "You still don't trust me, do you?"

And she had been quite right at the time.

Thing is, I don't really remember when I'd stopped calling Kanoke, 'Princess.' She had made no effort to point it out; she probably welcomed the change. But, from then on, something in the air had changed between us; I hadn't noticed until weeks afterwards. And when I did, it upset me that I'd slipped up.

But Maya had liked the little orphaned girl from the moment I'd brought her home… well, I didn't so much bring her home as I was followed home. And why not? Kanoke was a sweet girl with a loyal disposition. But that just didn't seem to register to Tanner when they'd first met. He made his dislike for the girl quite clear. And in reaction, she'd decided she hated him as well. And when it was asked of me to pick a side, I had no trouble taking little Maya's hand and walking out the door.

To this day, I couldn't tell you what happened in that room after I'd left. All they would say is, "we've reached an understanding." So, I've concluded that they had angry rival sex and were quite content to be around each other after that. Though two ten year olds having angry rival sex is rather unlikely, I'm quite fond of what that statement gets out of them. They still teased and toyed cruelly with the other, but Tanner would never actually intentionally hurt her, and she would beat on him when he did it, so I can safely say that all of us had a rather dysfunctional relationship.

I had told Kai there was nothing for me back there. I would much rather be here. I had lied. But it wouldn't be the same without Maya. That's what we ended up wanting to do, protect little Maya. The other two had adopted her as their own sister, if I'm not mistaken. And I'm not. So without that common goal, do you think we'd break apart? I'm so secretly terrified of breaking apart from them. I'd like to think we'd all stay together and morn, but honestly, how many childhood relationships last forever? God knows if I really could take it all back, I would stick a knife in Father's back before he even had the chance to lay his impure hands on my little angel!

I wonder how my new teammates would react to the knowledge that I could kill my father without any qualms. Sasuke, the hypocrite, would quickly decide never to turn his back on me again. Sakura, the narrow-minded, would be appalled. Kakashi might understand, maybe. And Naruto… Naruto, whom I'd already become so attached to… I bet he'd still take me in. His favorite question 'why?' vs., my 'what if's?' I really would have to hook him up with Hinata.

Speaking of Hinata, I'd most certainly take the girl shopping. She gave me pajamas, so it was my turn to give something back. I suppose I could just buy her pajamas. I needed to go shopping, too. No matter what anyone said, I needed to change my wardrobe. No one else did it, but to hell with everyone else! I fucking needed underwear! I'd never understand how people did it. Naruto practically had to do it because the shopkeepers were mostly bastards. So maybe he'd started some sort of trend. Now that was just silly. Sasuke wouldn't follow a trend; Sakura would, if Sasuke were setting it. Sigh. Did that mean they all wore the same underwear? How incredibly boring. Or were kunoichi supposed to wear thongs cuz of underwear lines? I prefer lace myself…

"Morning, Sasuke-kun!" Sakura sang as she bounced her way out the door.

Did Sakura wear a thong…?

"Hn."

DID HINATA WEAR A THONG!?

"Yukari-chan."

I shifted as she added the suffix to my name again, but gave no other sign of hearing her.

I had more bothersome things to think about.

'… Well, that's gonna bother me for a while…'

/You said it./

Sakura edged closer to me, I had come to associate this with her hesitance to ask me a question. Unfortunately, her hesitance never really seemed to last. But what would she ask in the presence of her other teammate? And more importantly, if I wanted to be a kunoichi, did I have to ditch my boy shorts and start wearing a thong?

"What're ya thinking about, Yukari-chan?"

I responded on impulse. "People, shopping, boy shorts, thongs…"

Her jaw dropped and I almost laughed aloud when Sasuke twitched. "B-but you're not supposed to, to, uh-" She couldn't find the words and I couldn't blame her. She'd put me in a rather neat mystery box, and no where near that box had she decided I did anything as girly as shopping for underwear. But as much as I appreciate that image, I never really liked boxes.

"Alright everyone, let's get going," Kakashi announced, book in hand, as he causally strolled out the door, Tsunami and the bridge builder at his heels. "Everyone ready?" There was a chorus of 'Hai's that he nodded appreciatively at. "Okay, I'll leave Naruto in your hands. He pushed his body to the limit. Overdoing it as usual. So he may not be able to move at all today."

If I hadn't known Naruto would wake and come after us, I'd be hesitant to leave him behind. But with any luck, I'd scared Pinky off by talking about thongs. And maybe Sasuke would keep up that angry silence he's had since I stopped Kai and him from ripping each other's heads off.

"What about you?" Tsunami stated worriedly. "You're still recovering yourself."

I grinned wolfishly at the woman who'd become so attached to my sensei. I'm not gonna lie, I had never considered the relationship before. It's not very implied in the animation, but there was attraction there, and it made me laugh.

"Why, do I look wobbly? I'll be okay," Kakashi assured.

Of course, he was right, but it made me wonder why the fuck I healed so damn slow!? The stomach wound was still there, scabbed up all nice and gross like, but still there.

"Come on, let's get going," Tazuna grunted and like good little soldiers, we marched off to battle.

'Haha, it's like a song.'

I hummed a few bars of my song of very few lyrics with my eyes closed in a content fashion. I felt more then saw Sakura working her way closer to me, though we weren't very far from each other to begin with. In the anime, Sasuke had used Kakashi to separate himself from the pink menace, but why use Kakashi when you can use little ol' Yukari-chan? This left Sakura on my immediate right.

"Um, Yukari-chan?"

I took a deep breath marveling at how little luck I truly had. "Yes, Pinky?"

"Well I wasn't going to ask you before, not that I think about it a lot…" I raised an eyebrow, quickly becoming an unwilling victim of my own curiosity. "But now that I know for sure that you think about some girly things, like, uh-"

"Underwear?" I offered.

"Um, yeah, underwear…" she trailed off for a moment and I bit my cheek. I was probably gonna regret this.

"You were saying?"

"Oh yes! Uh, I was just wondering, do you think wearing things like, er, thongs and lace, makes girls more attractive?"I choked on my own spit. This was brilliant; bloody, fucking brilliant.

"Yes, cuz I'm a lesbian and looking at women in sexy laundry makes me all hot and bothered." Sakura's face lit up red and she stumbled to keep up with my casual pace. "You hear that, Popsicle? Pinky has the hots for me now! Haha, no pink haired babies for you."

Sakura face planted and Sasuke gave me a look of complete mortification. Ah, life is good.

"Y-Yukari, no! I mean, just I-I W-wait I…" And I laughed with full-blown laughter that made Sakura stop her babble.

"Oh my god, Pinky, you're fabulous. Just fabulous. The look on your face, the questions you ask, fuck, I don't know how the Uchiha resists you. This is just fucking fabulous! Calm down, please, I get it, I get it." I was actually wiping mirth from my eyes. And why shouldn't I? I was one of the privileged few who were able to see Sasuke's face of mortification. "I can die happy now."

"Y-Yukari!" Sakura accused.

"Calling out my name already? I haven't even touched you yet."

Her face lit up again, she brought it on herself. "S-Stop!" she demanded. I grinned wickedly.

"Yukari-chan, perhaps you should tone down your humor a bit, ne?" Kakashi suggested.

I pouted. "Afraid of a little fire, Scarecrow?" I quoted. I blinked as I realized they wouldn't get it and sighed. "Sa, fine."

The duration of the walk was far less entertaining, much to my displeasure. And Sakura saw fit to stay as far away from me as physically possible. Haha. Sasuke still wasn't speaking. He probably stopped caring altogether. Which is a real pity, cuz it was extremely fun to bother him. I was suddenly regretting leaving Summers Storm behind. Just the pups company would have been a godsend to my boredom. It seemed like a good idea at the time. A battlefield was no place for the pup. Though, I've heard a lot about Haku's soft spot for small and fuzzy animals. It would be interesting to find out if it's true.

I couldn't shake the unnerving thought that my innocent little Hinata-chan might wear a thong. I wasn't even too sure how I'd come up with the entire idea. I think I'd been thinking about shopping. Harmless shopping. That's just… not fair.

And to top it all off, I'm sure that Tsunami shrunk my clothes. But probably not on purpose. Everything just seemed… a lot tighter, all of the sudden.

/Don't complain, you look hot./

I fought to find something else to think about, doing my utmost best to keep my mind from wandering to the upcoming fight. It wasn't that I didn't care; it wasn't even that I was afraid. But if I thought about it for too long, I would become jittery and paranoid. That was dangerous.

Haku's face appeared in my mind and my brow furrowed. I did not want the boy to die. The boy did not deserve to die. Maya had liked him… But I dare not change the plotline so drastically. It could get one of the main characters killed, disrupt time, or god knows what else. But I didn't want Haku to die… Was I really so selfish for wanting him to live even at the risk of everything? That didn't make sense; one person's life wasn't worth it, a person I'd never actually had a conversation with, no less. It just bothered me that he had to die; the first to die in the entire series was an innocent. And I was so clearly doing what I do so very often. For the first time, it was hard simply to ignore the problem.

I grimaced in irritation. This all could have been avoided… if only I'd been able to master that technique… but it was just too advanced. I was too… weak.

My eyes widened and my jaw locked at the mere thought. It was like being trapped in a fucking cage that didn't make any sense. By all rights, no matter how weak I was, I should have made SOME progress with that technique. But what did I get? Screwed over that's what I got. Nothing more than a puff of smoke. Fire was my favorite element, and not only did I suck at it, I was downright incapable of pulling off anything related to it.

'Fuck, no wonder Sasuke can't stand fighting his brother,' I thought.

/Cheer up, Bubbles-chan!/

'Tch.'

/Tut tut, you're not even using real words anymore./

'Like you care.'

/Oh but I do. A brooding Bubbles is a boring Bubbles. You never let yourself have any fun anymore/ it pouted.

Yes, I've resorted to calling it an 'it.'

/But that's silly, Bubbles! Clearly, I have a gender!/

'Well, I won't call you she. It's like admitting I'm completely off my rocker.'

/Actually, I'm the opposite of you! You're sulky and I'm cheery. You're dark and I'm light. You're female, I'm male-/

I choked.

'Excuse me!?'

/Aw, you know what I mean, don't ya? I'm the stuff you won't let out!/

I twitched in a rather seizure-like fashion and had to ignore Kakashi's pointed glance.

'So, erm, what? You're a guy?'

/Bubble-chan learns fast!/

I tripped. And over my own two feet, too, thank you very much.

'You're male!? The fuck?'

/Quite right. And if you let out some of your pent up happiness and craziness, I wouldn't be as hyper as I am./

'So you LIKED it when Clare KISSED us!?' Hey man, something here just isn't right.

/Not exactly, that's kinda of confusing./

I let this bit of information process for a bit. This was the first time I'd ever really considered the fact that the voice in my head might be a guy. It had never come up before, and I couldn't remember a time when there'd been any hints. This voice had been with me for a long time, so long in fact, that there was something incredibly comforting about its presence.

/That's because you need me, Bubbles-chan. I balance you out and absorb the emotions that you don't let other people see. Because of me, you're not bursting with emotional trauma./

'The fuck?'

/Sounds about right./ The voice sighed.

'But, but your voice it's all girly and stuff...' I was trying to break the denial, really, I was. But trust me, it's a hell of a lot harder then it sounds.

/I'm an extension of you, Bubbles-chan, created by you—our voices are the same-/

'Until you hit puberty?' I inquired.

/You make it sound like a bad thing/ it whined. /I'm only thirteen, after all. It's not completely unheard of… Some guys just have… girly voices…/

'Plus, you're totally gay.'

/That's not completely true… it's complicated, Bubbles-chan./

'Gaaaaaaaaay.'

It gave an indignant snort. /Technically, I'm not gay./

I froze for moment, letting realization hit me at his statement.

"I AM NOT GAY!" I announced rather loudly.

Everyone stopped walking. An eerie silence enveloped us. No one knew how to respond. I hadn't meant to say it aloud.

"Um Yukari…" Kakashi started, strangely baffled by this new situation.

But to hell with all of that. If the suddenly very male and very gay voice in my head wanted to challenge my sexual preference, then I'd be damned if we weren't going to court over it!

/Bubbles-chan, I already told you I'm not gay!/

"You have to be gay, if you're not gay, then I am gay, and I am certainly not gay. You said it yourself." I was talking aloud now, my hand raised in defense. No one moved.

/Blah! Forget what I said/ the voice cried. /I explained it wrong, okay. We're not complete opposites. Technically, that's impossible anyway! I'm just your emotional back up, created at the alternative of you slipping into manic depression. It's pure chance that I'm male!" he moaned.

I blinked.

"Ooooooooh. Oookaaaay," I nodded, putting my hand down and smiling happily. "Silly gay man."

I decided I had two choices. Go with it, or pretend they were all going insane. Both sucked. I started walking again as though my little outburst had never happened. It still didn't make much sense to me, but, fuck, who was I to argue with the gay voice in my head?

'I still think you're gay, you know,' I figured decisively.

/Fine./ He gave up. /If you say so… well done, Bubbles-chan/ he stated proudly.

I frowned. 'Hm?'

/You let yourself panic!/

I sweat dropped.

'That's not something to be proud of,' I grumbled. 'You know, I can't even talk to you that same way anymore.' I sighed.

'It's kinda weird knowing I had a guy in my head this whole time,' I admitted… to myself, my inner self… my inner guy self. The man in me.

'What the hell is wrong with me?'

/Just go with it/ it… he suggested.

I chose to ignore it.

-- --

"Yukari, what happened back there!?" Sakura questioned.

It had taken her a while of, what I suspected to be, deducing in her head before she spoke to me. And I suppose when she couldn't conclude, she demanded an answer. I couldn't say I was very surprised. Sakura had never been on the end of one of my chibi tantrums before, unlike Sasuke, who was doing a damn good job at pretending nothing had happened back there. Kakashi, I believe, had only arrived to the conclusion a while ago that he did not want to know. And the only question on Tazuna's face was if he had made a good choice in putting his life in the hands of the hyperactive, the fan girl, the moody, the porn addict, and the schizoid.

This left me with Pinky. Funny, I didn't remember the walk to the bridge being quite this long.

"I don't know what you're talking about, Haruno-san." I Xelloss-smiled at her and she twitched.

"You know darn well what I'm talking about Yukari!" she huffed impatiently. "You freaked out on us back there!" she insisted.

"Hm, did I really?" I was trying not to grin.

"Creamsicle-kun, whatever is she talking about?" I addressed Sasuke.

"Hn."

I grinned.

"Oh my, I think that puts little Uchiha on my side, Pinky, could you have imagined it, maybe?" Sakura looked at Sasuke in shock and then at me in disbelief.

"Kakashi-sensei, you saw it, didn't you!?" Sakura was near a panicked state now.

"I don't particularly want to know, Sakura." Kakashi stated, turning a page in his book.

My grin widened at the expected answer.

"But, but…" Sakura stared around desperately.

"Silly Pinky-chan." I gave a fake giggle that was laced with so much false innocence I almost choked on it and Sasuke literally flinched away. "You overwork yourself, you know. Poor dear. You need to relax more. You know, I know this lovely little ice cream place, I'd be glad to take you later. We could bring the Ice Cube as well, ne? You could learn his favorite flavor."

I hadn't really expected the idea to work and I was very surprised by Sakura's sudden mood change.

"Do you like ice cream, Sasuke-kun!?" she gasped excitedly.

I sweat dropped. That had been strangely easy. Sasuke cast a death glare in my direction and I waved casually back at him. He was proving to be incredibly useful on this trip. He was entertaining, fun to confuse, he made the strangest faces (whenever he wasn't wearing that mask of his), when speaking with him, I'd forgotten all about my little dream of Shura, and of course, right now, he was proving to be a lovely distraction.

"Hold on!" I heard Tazuna's suddenly alarmed voice and tensed in realization. When had I stopped paying attention to where I was going? "What the heck is this!?" he cried.

I knew before I even looked up where we were and what I would see.

The first thing I registered was the bodies. The workers lying in awkward positions, sprawled out from when they'd been chosen as the enemy's next victims. Their tools lay scattered about them and only the grunts that escaped their mouths convinced me they still lived. The fact that they did indeed still live made me conclude this to be Haku's work, and I was very sure if we were to check, we'd find senbon or at least puncture makes about the bodies.

"What happened!?" Tazuna panicked. "Someone was here, someone got to them!"

I could not force myself to be annoyed at his obvious statement.

"Could it be?" I heard my sensei mutter.

I braced myself, slapped by the sudden cold as waves of mist rolled over us. Thicker and thicker. There was no doubt.

"This mist…" Kakashi was finally at his inevitable conclusion.

"He's baaaaaaack," I sang, my own voice echoed and sounded creepy when thrown to the wind.

"Sasuke, Sakura, Yukari, get ready!" Kakashi sounded alarmed as the four of us successfully boxed Tazuna in. Sakura shook in confusion at my right, Sasuke shook in excitement at my left, and each of them drew a kunai from their pouch.

"I knew he was still alive." Kakashi voice seemed strained. "He just couldn't wait for round two." Though my back was to Kakashi, I knew he held a hand sign and I briefly wondered if I'd be able to make my way discreetly to the front of the group so that I might watch.

"Kakashi-sensei! It's Zabuza, isn't it!? This is his Hidden Mist Jutsu!" Sakura confirmed.

No need for Kakashi to answer, she was sure.

"Sorry I kept you waiting, Kakashi."

The voice came from nowhere and from everywhere, floating about the mist in a successfully ominous way. I ticked an eyebrow, of course, I hadn't expected him to apologize to me, but it would have been nice.

"I see you still have those brats with you."

I hissed in a way akin to an offended cat.

"That one's still trembling. Pitiful." I knew it to be addressed towards Sasuke. And in a moment, a split second of pure speed, many Zabuzas had circled us, perhaps 8 or 9. I did not care to count. Originally, the demon of the mist would have appeared before Tazuna, but I was in front of him now, an addition to the team.

And Sasuke smiled.

"I'm trembling with… excitement."

"Go on, Sasuke." Kakashi allowed.

Zabuza let out a grunt, I know not if it was of disbelief, offense, or something else all together, but it did not last long. Sasuke swept around with commendable speed. I'd have joined him as my pride wished it to be so, but instead I stayed put, letting Sasuke feed his own pride, and he would need the confidence boost as my narcissistic self did not.

A slash to the chest of each clone and they all came crashing down as water. I took Sasuke's place to watch and I laughed. The sound was enhanced by the fog, I sounded cruel and amused. I loved it.

"Oh, so you could see they were water clones," Zabuza mused, stepping before us, his apprentice calmly standing at his side. "Brat's improving. Looks like you have a rival, Haku."

"So it seems," Haku replied. I wondered for a moment if Sasuke would make the name connection, though I do not believe he did.

"What are you laughing about? Gone insane with fear?" Zabuza inquired.

"Me?" I asked, had I been laughing this whole time? He snarled and I knew he remembered me. I was glad. "I'm just glad for the wardrobe change. You really do look much better now, you know"

His snarl grew. "Still have that mouth on you, I see."

"But of course."

"I'll rip it off this time," he assured.

"That would be quite a pity. I have a lovely voice, you know. Shall I sing you a song?" There was a brief silence. "No? Perhaps at your funeral then."

"Well, well." Attention was back on Kakashi. "So I had it right. It was all an act. An act, and a cute little mask."

Sakura made a short noise.

"Big fully," Sasuke scoffed. I faltered for a moment wondering if that was a word.

"So I guess all that about being a tracker ninja protecting his village was just a bunch of bull," Tazuna put in.

"They look pretty chummy to me," Kakashi said. "I'd guess they've been pulling scams like that for a long time."

"He's got some nerve facing us again after pulling that trick," Sakura huffed. She's been doing that a lot today.

"Hiding behind a mask. Who does he think he's fooling?" I sweat dropped at Kakashi's choice of words.

"Speak for yourself, sensei," Sakura laughed.

"That's it," Sasuke stated, his head lowering like a bull ready to charge. "Who does he think he's fooling, hiding behind that mask like some sort of clown?"

"Sasuke!" Sakura squealed. "You're so cool."

"Wait a second, didn't I just say that?" Kakashi mopped dejectedly.

"Ice Cube, could you at least try to be original?" I scoffed.

He did not spare me a glare.

On the other side of us, I knew Zabuza and Haku were consulting on some matter, I also knew the conversation to be ended when the tornado that was Haku came spiraling towards us. Or Sasuke, to be more precise. I watched in mild fascination as Sasuke prepared himself.

Haku looked like he was dancing, each step as fluidly placed as his last, though fast and masterful. Closer and closer. I received a breeze from his calculated steps. Closer and closer Sasuke tensed at my side. Closer and closer. Senbon glinting in the winds. Closer and closer.

CLASH!

Sasuke's kunai met Haku's senbon in mid-spin, both freezing in the dramatic collision. I stood behind them, slightly awed.

"Sakura, cover Tazuna and stay close to me, let Sasuke handle this," Kakashi ordered. I found it rather convenient that he'd left me out of this order, since I intended to ignore whatever he said.

The two boys spun again and again, metal ringing as they met. And again, they repeated this sequence of blocking and spinning and dancing.

"We want the bridge builder, not you. If you back down, I won't have to kill you." Haku's words were muffled by the mask and his naturally soft voice made me strain to hear him.

Sasuke smirked. "Save it," he responded.

"You're making a mistake," Haku tried. He sounded rather remorseful. "You won't be able to keep up with my speed. I've gained two key advantages."

"Yeah, what are they?" Sasuke grunted, hands shaking with the effort it took his hand to block Haku's continuously.

"First, we are surrounded by water. Second, I've blocked one of your hands. Therefore, you only have one free hand to defend yourself with." Haku brought his hand up and Sasuke narrowed his eyes. And one-handed, the demon's apprentice began to form half hand seals. It looked rather ridiculous because I was having difficulties telling which seals were which, due to both speed and my own lack of knowledge. "Secret jutsu."

My eyes widened and I leaned closer, more eager then I should have been.

"A thousand needles of death."

Water sprang up into the air, hovered for but a moment, then thinned into thousands of tiny blades fit to call them senbon.

I saw Sasuke's hand sign and I felt the chakra appear at his feet as I had many times before. The senbon flew. It didn't feel like he'd gotten the chakra there fast enough. And then… everything shook as the senbon contacted the ground. Haku spun away from his own attack unharmed and Sasuke, who'd jumped to high with the use of his chakra, remained unscathed.

One, two, three shuriken Sasuke threw, each landing where Haku had been only a moment before. Sasuke appeared behind the boy a confident smirk adorning his features.

"You're not as fast as you think!" he said confidently. "From this point on, you'll be the one defending against my attacks."

I winced at his arrogance.

They both separated and again they spun in their dance, Sasuke's steps quickening as though the music tempo had changed in his own favor. They met fist to fist and Sasuke's kunai flew over Haku's head as the apprentice ducked to dodge. It wouldn't be enough. The Uchiha was fast. His foot connected with Haku's face and the boy flew backwards at the contact.

"Thought you were quicker, huh? What else are you wrong about?"

Sasuke was making it easy for all of us to hear him. Perhaps his pride was roaring too loud, but Zabuza looked a bit pissed off.

"You've made a mistake insulting these ninja and calling them brats," Kakashi put in dramatically. "That's just guaranteed to bring out Sasuke's attitude and he's the best young fighter in the Hidden Leaf Village. And Sakura here is our sharpest mind."

Sakura giggled at the recognition.

"Yukari is our quickest tongue and fast to find a weakness."

My eyes widened as he addressed me. It was a sentence I was unfamiliar with, as it had not been in the original animation. Though, I suppose on some level I had expected him to ignore me in his speech, it suddenly seemed stupid to think so.

"I can dance, too." I added, grinning cheekily through my awe.

"And last, but not least," Kakashi continued. "Our number one, hyperactive, knucklehead ninja is Naruto Uzumaki."

The brief silence that followed after was quickly broken by Zabuza's laughter. I suppose it was more of a chuckle, but it served its purpose.

"Haku, if we keep going on like this, we'll be the victims instead of them. Get on with it!"

"Right." Haku stood. He seemed taller now, but perhaps that was just me. I forced myself not to gasp as I could feel the surge in Haku's chakra, my left hand twitching at the sudden power. I could see it. It showed the blue coming off him like fire in the anime as well. But now I could feel it, it was strong and foreign to me. "I'm sorry it's come to this," Haku apologized.

The air was so cold now and Sasuke voice had become too quiet for me to hear. The demon's apprentice brought up both hands to form a hand sign. My eyes widened, I had thought I'd had more time.

Damn commercials!

A pillar of ice was already forming into a sheet behind Sasuke before I had even moved. I tried to be fast; I had pumped chakra into the soles of my boots so that I might get Sasuke away from the danger. I had tried not to crash into the sudden appearance of Zabuza before me… but I had failed. My small form did not budge the missing nin, and I stumbled less than gracefully away from him.

Another mirror formed, then yet another.

"And where do you think you're going?" he asked.

"That's a stupid question," I spat. His eyes narrowed.

Another mirror formed.

"I don't have time for this!" I tried to go around him and his arm shot out to stop me. Thankfully, I did not crash into it this time; there was not enough inertia.

"Haku is fighting the boy right now; you'd do well not to interrupt."

Another mirror formed.

Adrenaline pounded through my blood, not unlike the time Naruto had been attacked. It urged me forward, demanding that I move, though common sense told me I'd only be stopped should I try. My eyes narrowed as I realized that this time, just like last time, I might very well be too late.

"Demon of the Mist, I have neither the time nor the patience to deal with you right now!" The voice that left me was low and feral, muttering a warning that, somewhere within me, I knew I could not follow through on. Not yet, not here, not now. Zabuza could kill me. But my adrenaline high was unsatisfied. I was still unmoving, and it demanded action.

"What makes you think you can get past me, kid?" He seemed relatively amused. "That mouth of yours is going to get you killed someday. Act foolishly and that day will be today."

I hissed.

Another mirror formed.

Time was running out and Sasuke was not moving. In fact, Zabuza and I seemed to be the only ones not completely mesmerized by Haku's bloodline ability. Had the situation not been dire, I'd have smirked.

"Because I, like you, have been titled demon before. And a demon is measured by its darkness and its intent." My pupils dilated and I summoned up the most killing intent and malice I could manage, willing it to seep through my pores and purge the very mist to reach him.

Another mirror formed.

"Wanna see my darkness, Za-bu-za?"

His eyes seemed to widen as his name escaped my lips. There was power behind its use, something strange about the way I'd uttered the word that disturbed him. And I grinned, willing myself to seem as excited as possible and not show the briefest bit of alarm.

Another mirror formed.

I needed to leave and I needed to do it now.

I tried to use Zabuza's brief hesitance against him and, in my naivety, I again tried to go around him. His arm was thrown out again. I tried to stop. I really did… but I slipped.

It's not as bad as it sounds; the water carried me smoothly underneath his arm. And being that it was unplanned, there was no way he could have seen it coming.

I jumped up, having skidded away, and rushed again towards Sasuke. There was pain in my arm. Something I'd define as concrete burn, perhaps.

"Uchiha, time to go!" I announced, unsure of what I had planned and acting upon it anyway. I gripped his arm in my panic and tried to drag him away. "We need to get out of here!" I had only dragged him a few steps before he jerked away. "Um, heelllo!" I growled. "This has got bad written all over it, we need to move, now!"

More mirrors were forming, yet still the boy was ignoring me.

"Christ, Uchiha!" I tried to drag him away again. But again, the idiot shook me off.

"Get off, Yukari!" Sasuke demanded.

It was gonna be too late soon. The dome was almost complete."Are stupid or something!?" He cast me a glare, but I really didn't care.

A mirror appeared behind me. I tensed.

"Danger, Will Robinson. Danger!" It dawned on me that he was not moving and I growled again, drawing Winters Frost from the place at my belt. "If I die in here because I wasn't able to drag your skinny, little ass away, then god help you, Popsicle, because I'm gonna haunt your sorry ass for the rest of your life."

"This is my fight!" he announced. "Stay out of it!"

I gave the most incredulous look. "Haven't you learned anything since the bell test!? Or did you just tune me out like you do the rest of the world?"

"I don't need your help to beat this guy!" he insisted, still not meeting my eyes. He was making this more difficult then it needed to be. Not as if I could leave them alone if I'd wanted too, the dome was complete. Bloody, fucking brilliant.

"Just like you didn't 'need' my help to pass that test?" It wasn't a question, though I was sure his eyes were widening.

"_I'm not sure what to do right now… hit you or pity you.__"_

He turned to me in realization as I began to quote myself.

"_Poor Uchiha, your arrogance will be your downfall… it's not wrong to accept help, you know…__"_

…_Then you will fail… _

He muttered and grudgingly he nodded at me. "Fine, do what you want. But I'm not leaving."

'Good enough,' I decided.

And quite suddenly, Haku was everywhere. Each ice mirror that made up the dome Sasuke and I were now trapped in wore Haku as its image.

'Shit, hope we didn't miss anything too important during that little revelation.'

/Aw, I wanted to see Haku merge with the mirror./

"Now, we'll begin." Haku's voice, like Zabuza's before, came from nowhere and everywhere at once. "And I'll show you what speed really is."

'Brilliant. Another arrogant son of a-'

Pain.

I choked on my own scream as pain rippled through my body. Needles. Hundreds, maybe thousands of them were scratching along the surface of my skin, ripping my clothes. Blood drenched my form. I wrapped my arms around my stomach in hopes to protect the unhealed area.

Sasuke was no better off then me. The force of the needles actually lifted him from the ground. Though… I realized quite suddenly that I would live. Haku did not want us dead. He never had. Or he'd have killed Naruto in that forest, skewered Sasuke from the beginning, and turned on me when I'd so clearly recognized him that morning.

Sound became quite mute and the pain dulled as I retreated into the comfort of my mind. But Sasuke's screams were so loud in my muted world. This couldn't be helped. I realized that standing so far from him was complete idiocy.

I phased in front of him, wincing in my pain, and forming hand signs on my way, ready to perform my chakra barrier… I changed them half way through, it took up too much chakra, and I'd have to save it. "Ice technique! Ice Crystal Barrage!"

The cold air became noticeably worse and frost formed at the tips of my eyelashes, but the crystals formed in the air. And then they flew. I had made as many as I thought possible and acting as their own shield, they met Haku's senbon in mid air in a distinct block. It did not block them all, but it was better, a thousand times better. I breathed deeply, my lungs reacting unkindly to the chill in the air, but my body demanding that I breathe. Sasuke collapsed at my side, trembling with more damage then I'd thought, but not enough to kill.

I knelt beside the boy. "Uchiha, are you…"

Saying, 'Are you all right?' would have been the stupidest thing to say right now. Well, apart from, 'Look on the bright side! At least your brother's not here!' But, that would be beyond stupid and more into the territory of suicidal.

"Get up, Uchiha. You're not dead, so get up. You chose to stay in the dome, now you'll live to get out of this dome, even if I have to take down Haku and drag you into Pinky's waiting embrace myself!" I barked.

He shot me a glare.

"Here!" Sakura called.

Sasuke and I both watched as she threw the kunai that had been knocked clear from Sasuke's fingertips during the attack. Sasuke reached up to catch it, but Haku got to it first, the upper half his body joining the three-dimensional world to do so. It was actually kinda cool, despite the fact that Sakura, the oh-so-brilliant kunoichi, had just given our ENEMY a WEAPON!

'You know what? Grr… just grr.'

/Amen/

The shuriken came from two different directions and both hit the mark that was Haku's mask. The force threw the boy from his mirror until he was lying on the pavement. I smirked at everyone's confusion.

"About time he showed up."

There was a loud BANG and cloud upon cloud of smoke with the boy's oh-so-inconspicuous appearance.

"Number one…" I heard Haku say, "hyperactive knucklehead ninja."

The smoke cleared… the suspense built dramatically as Naruto appeared in all his orange glory.

"Naruto Uzumaki… is here! Yeah! Believe it!" Naruto stated in his loud, overbearing, oh-my-god-I'm-glad-Kit's-here kind of way.

/Haha./

"Now that I'm here, everything's gonna be okay!" he announced, sounding so sure that I was tempted to believe him.

"Naruto!" Sakura yelled happily, like a perfect, little damsel in distress.

"You know how in stories, the hero usually shows up in the end and then kicks butt? Well, that's what I'm gonna do right now. Believe it!"

Although I suppose it's not how I would have done it, if Naruto had done it my way, he simply wouldn't be the Naruto I know and love.

"Eh, this brat again," Zabuza scoffed in annoyance.

"Heh. Idiot," I muttered and Sasuke seemed to agree. "Cute, but... idiotic," I laughed.

"How is that cute?" Sasuke asked, choking either on the blood that was coming out of his mouth, or on his own spit. Who knows?

"Oh, come now, Uchiha, You don't need to hide your feeling from me." He gave me a bewildered look. "I saw you kiss the boy myself. We all know you like him." I grinned. He choked again.

"You're delusional," he stated.

I laughed. "Denial, that's cute, too." I cooed, pinching his cheek in the old-person fashion.

"All right! You're history!" Naruto shouted, drawing my attention away from the moody homo next to me. "Shadow Clone Jutsu!"

My left hand twitched. That was my only warning of the surge that had passed through the air before four of Zabuza's shuriken were sent hurtling towards Naruto. A moment where Kakashi called out, the same moment where Haku had released his own attack, this moment where thought left me and my body became ridged.

"Haku," I whispered.

There was a clang as metal met metal and the attacks of the Demon and his apprentice collided. Haku had saved Naruto's life. I was sure he'd have been all right even if the shuriken had hit him, since he was Naruto, after all. But Haku had no way of knowing that. How could I have forgotten that the boy had literally saved Uzumaki Naruto?

Sasuke's eyes widened in realization and he sat up faster than I'd recommend. He shrugged off the pain and came up behind me to grip my shoulder.

"Haku! The boy from the forest!?" Sasuke had finally connected the dots. I did not answer.

"He didn't get him," I heard Sakura say.

"Their weapons canceled each other out. Now that's what I'd call lucky, I think." I almost snorted at Tazuna's statement; luck had nothing to do with it.

And then Pinky snapped. "What are you doing Naruto!? Are you crazy!?"

"This is a battle, not a talent show! Don't let your opponent see your jutsu!" Kakashi sounded pissed off. "The shinobi's art is deception. Always keep your enemies guessing. Even when executing a single jutsu one much distract their enemy's attention, catch them off guard, and out maneuver them. You just turn yourself into a human target when you enter a battle like that."

"Jeez cut the kid some slack, Scarecrow." I pitched.

"We can't afford to, Yukari! In a life-and-death situation, you can't let things like this go!" he shot back.

I shrunk back into Sasuke's chest, not used to my sensei's anger.

"Ah! I'm sorry! I was just trying to rescue everybody!" Naruto screamed, gripping his head in shame.

"But… there's another mystery here." Kakashi said. He was so quiet, I hardly heard him over Naruto's wailing.

"Haku," Zabuza demanded roughly. "What are you doing?"

"Zabuza… this boy… let my fight him my own way. Please." Haku's request was strange for anyone who did not know the reasoning, aka the boy and I, considering I'd seen inside his head before.

"Bring it on!" Naruto dared, his mood changing back to being confident and loud.

There was a moment of silence in which Haku never took his eyes off Naruto. Then finally, Zabuza closed his eyes and reopened them in a lazy fashion.

"Heh, so you want me to leave this to you. Is that it, Haku?" Another silence was the boys answer. "As usual, you're too soft."

Haku's head lowered. "Forgive me."

Sasuke blinked, mulling those words over behind me and for his benefit only, I muttered, "Explains why we're still alive."

Sasuke faltered.

"I'm warning you!" Naruto shouted, pointing a bit rudely in the masked boy's direction. "One way or another, I'm gonna rip that mask off and take you apart!"

Words passed between Kakashi and Zabuza that I didn't make out over Sasuke's growl. But, I suppose Zabuza was simply reminding Scarecrow that should he leave his position now, Tazuna would be sacrificed.

"That mask and your bogus story! You were with Zabuza all along!" Naruto started again, significantly louder than my sensei and the missing nin. "You think you can get away with a stunt like that!?"

"I'm sorry," Haku responded.

Sasuke choked in his new spot next to me.

"But as your sensei said, deceiving your opponent, catching them off guard, that is the art of the shinobi. Please don't take it personally."

Sasuke saw an opportunity in this conversation and he seized it. How do I know? His fucking kunai whizzed past, inches away from my right ear. Haku leaned back—that's all he did—and the kunai missed.

"I haven't forgotten about you," Haku assured. "Not for an instant. Nor have I forgotten the girl."

I quirked an eyebrow. "You hitting on me?"

Sasuke deadpanned.

"No, I shall simply keep in mind that you also know an ice jutsu." Haku responded, not at all perturbed by the random comment.

"Shame," I sighed. "You're pretty cute under that mask."

This earned me a reaction from all parties present. An anime fall from Naruto, a seizure-like reaction from Sasuke, a calm glance from the ice master himself, and a sharp, alarmed glare from just about everyone else.

"Some warriors accept defeat gracefully. They know when they are beaten." Haku said to Sasuke. I think he was ignoring me. "Others do not. So be it. Let us finish our battle, then. To the death!"

"Nice job pissing him off, Sasuke." I grunted, hulling myself to my feet.

"You," Haku spoke again. Strange I don't remember this part either. "You are free to leave, you know you cannot win against me and have not issued any further attack."

Was he talking to me? I looked blankly at him for a moment and then I laughed.

"Perhaps that mask of yours is cutting off the oxygen flow to your brain. You seem to think me weak. Let me assure you that I will not idly stand by while you attack those who are precious to me," I responded good-naturedly.

"If that is your decision."

I smiled at him. "It is."

"So be it." He nodded and walked towards the mirrors again.

"Hey, where are you going?!" Naruto shouted.

"It's all right, Naruto," The masked boy assured, stopping in front of a mirror. "We'll have our fight next."

From my incredibly horrid angle, I couldn't see Haku phase into the mirror. My eye twitched; my luck sucks ass. On the bright side, though, when Haku did appear it was in the mirror right in front of Sasuke and, at the very least, I got to see that much.

Sasuke tensed, reaching into his pouch for a weapon.

"I'm behind you," Haku said.

We both must have blinked, for, true to his word, the demon's apprentice was no longer in front of me. And then, one by one, the mirrors all filled up with Haku's image, showing him with his arm raised, a senbon between each finger, and poised for attack.

I opened my mouth to make witty comment and reveal Haku's secret as speed, when…

SHIT!

I threw myself in Sasuke's direction as to protect both him and my stomach wound.

Pain.

"Come on, Uchiha!" I shouted. "We're getting our asses kicked!" Sasuke grunted, stumbling forward into me as the onslaught of needles was put on hold.

"Sasuke-kun!" Sakura shouted.

"Angel-chan!" Naruto called.

I caught the avenger and steadied him, shuttering in my own right from the attack. "I know what you're thinking," I started and he stared wearily up at me. "But dying, just so you can escape the fangirls, is a stupid idea!"

"That's not what I was thinking!" he growled. "Do you think… do you think he has clones in the mirrors, all throwing needles at the same time?" Sasuke asked, his voice lowering so much that I almost didn't catch it.

"Too fast for that," I stated. "And he wouldn't need the mirrors."

"Sasuke, Naruto, think!" Kakashi yelled. "You need to attack the mirrors from the outside and the inside at the same time!"

"What am I, chopped liver!?" I called in annoyance.

"Perfect." I heard Sasuke mutter.

He must have derived a conclusion to equal Naruto and him simultaneously attacking from both sides.

…

"Hey! I snuck in here to save you!"

I don't know how he did it. I didn't even see him coming.

I stumbled backwards and Sasuke fell on his ass in total surprise. Unlike Sasuke, Naruto had derived a conclusion to equal him coming in here to save us. Inside the dome… not outside it… Well… that sucks. Meanwhile, on Sasuke's face, new muscles were straining themselves into what was one of the most hilarious expressions I've ever seen in my entire life.

"Pretty cool move, huh, guys?" Naruto grinned and I laughed.

"So much for that plan," I chuckled.

"You are a complete loser! You're a shinobi! Think carefully before you move!!" Sasuke shouted angrily.

"What the heck's your problem!? You should thank me for coming in here to help you!" Naruto yelled back.

"Naruto, if we're both inside here… Argh! Forget it! I've had it with your mistakes." The Uchiha looked damn close to strangling my little, blond friend.

"And I've had it with your attitude! Believe it!" Naruto shot.

/Ah, lovers spat./

"That's it! I'm gonna destroy these mirrors right now!" Sasuke shouted, pure annoyance fueling his voice.

"Hey! What attack are you using?" Naruto demanded as Sasuke finished his hand signs.

"These mirrors are made of ice. How do you destroy ice? Figure it out!" Sasuke was not in a patient mood and I patted Naruto on the shoulder in a reassuring fashion.

"Don't worry, he's just ticked that I said Haku's cute." I said with a stupid smile and a matter-of-fact tone.

Sasuke growled.

"Fireball jutsu!"

Flames erupted from the Uchiha's mouth, forcing my hair back with hot air and engulfing a majority of the dome in fiery glory. I squinted, the heat rush making my eyes water and, for a moment, I could not help but feel immense jealousy. Fire: The element that seemed so determined not to ally me and the element the Uchiha seemed to have a natural talent for. I know it's wrong of me to feel jealous over something that was not in the Uchiha's control. But damn, if I could just use fire…

The confident expression on Sasuke's face faltered into utter disbelief. Not only were the mirrors still standing—oh no, they were completely unmarred. The attacked disappeared harmlessly, leaving only vapor in its midst.

"That didn't do anything at all!" Naruto accused, jumping to his feet.

"You'll need much more heat than that to melt this ice." Haku commented.

Sasuke was pissed.

Had I not known it was coming, I'd not have sensed it at all. But then again, just because you know something's coming doesn't always mean you can stop it. The sudden barrage of needles came hard and fast, forcing a cry from my throat as my comrades and I were thrown backwards.

"Where is he!?" Naruto demanded. "Where's the needle attack coming at us from!? Are they clones?!"

Naruto stood and I smirked, ready to get myself in more trouble than was necessary.

"We've gotta find the real one!"

"You can look into these mirrors all you like and you'll never find the secret," Haku responded quite confidently.

"Your speed," I said suddenly.

Sasuke and Naruto turned to face me and Haku's head rose as well.

"You're using a kekeigenkei and speed. You're too fast for us to even see."

Sasuke and Naruto looked shocked.

"What gave you that idea?"

I was a little put off by Haku not showing much surprise, for I knew I'd accomplished something here and my pride was suddenly sulking in a corner.

"Aside from it being one of the only possible explanations, you gave it away before you even started your assault." I tried to keep a matter-of-fact tone, but it was all betrayed as a proud grin marred my face. Sure, I had nothing to be proud of. I wouldn't have figured it out if I didn't know from the anime, but I'll be damned if this wasn't gonna leave an impression.

"Oh?"

"Yes, you said 'I'll show you what speed really is.' Now, you could have meant the speed with which you threw the needles, and I considered that. But that comment also got me to thinking. For a while I didn't want to believe that you were really just that fast, but that last attack…" I was lying. "If only for that one moment I saw you, I KNOW I saw you."

"You are quite perceptive. It's true, these mirrors only reflect my image, allowing me to transport myself at light speed. Through my eyes, you appear to be moving in slow motion."

There was a silence as realization seeped in, a silence inside the dome where fear crept at the edges of our little genin visions, a silence forced back by Naruto Uzumaki.

"I couldn't break though! So what!?" Naruto yelled in determination. "He's not gonna stop me! I'm not giving up. And I'm not gonna lose here… Cuz I have a dream and no one's gonna take it away from me! Someday I'll be respected in my village! That's my dream! To be the greatest Hokage!"

Something Naruto said struck a cord in our enemy. And I felt goose bumps trail up my arms from either the cold or the memory, I could not tell you which.

"Dreams…" Haku murmured. "It… it was not my desire to be a shinobi… it's painful. I don't want to kill you, but if you advance, I will have no choice. Then I will kill the kindness in my own heart, and embrace the shinobi way. And there will be no mercy, no turning back. This bridge will be the battlefield where our dreams collide. Now I must fight for my dream, just as you fight for yours. Please do not blame me. I-I fight for someone who is precious to me. I live for him, and I'd face death for him, so that his dream may become reality. That is my dream. And for the sake of that dream, if I must, I will act as a shinobi and take your lives."

There was finality in Haku's voice, a chilling certainty that struck Sasuke and Naruto with strange smiles. Smiles of relation.

And me, what was my dream? A child's dream without Maya. I had no brother to kill, no village I wanted to recognize me.

Naruto charged.

"Shadow Clone Jutsu!" he cried, bursting into dozens.

Sasuke formed hand signs and all I could do was watch. Every time I'd seen this episode, I'd think fondly of the little blond girl at my side, think 'oh well, I have you, Maya.' And be none the more affected by these words.

It felt as if I was going to cry but I knew that I couldn't. When dreams collide like this, when they meet and only one will succeed. Haku, Kimimaro, The Sound Four, everyone Orochimaru deceived, ever will deceive.

And I HATE him for that. I hate him, I hate him, I hate him.

Something dark curled in my stomach, and my entire face burned with tears and emotions that made my arms weak and my throat tight.

He was going to take Sasuke, he was going to ruin Naruto. As if the boy hadn't had enough bullshit as it was!

'Orochimaru, Orochimaru, Orochimaru.'

Kill the third Hokage, use Gaara for his power.

'I hate him, I hate him, I hate him!'

"_You little wretch!" he screamed, his fist landing in my jaw. The metallic taste of blood was in my mouth and I fought the urge to spit it back at him. _

"_That's right, you little bitch, just stay down!" _

_But I rose, shakily and battered, but I rose. _

"_WHY DO YOU KEEP GETTING UP?" _

_I refused to answer. Instead, I kept a miraculously blank face and stared back at him with hollow eyes. _

I froze.

'This… no, no… this was not Orochimaru. This was… this was…'

Naruto's clones were taken down, Sasuke's second fireball skimmed its target. They were getting close and though I knew this, could see it, hear it, something about it just didn't seem to register.

"_You ungrateful whore!" _

"_Bitch, I'll teach you to talk back to me!" _

"_You are no daughter of mine!" _

And Maya. Maya, Maya, Maya, Maya.

'Please, go back, don't come to me, go back. Let him kill me. Oh god, please.'

My entire body burned, my wounds felt so incredibly fresh, but I couldn't move, I couldn't breathe. She came to me and I couldn't say it. I couldn't tell her to leave, get out of the way. I couldn't warn her. I wanted to scream, I wanted to cry. It hurt, it hurt, it hurt.

'Please god, no!'

"I was so close, but I couldn't quite get to him," Naruto grunted.

"Naruto, can you do it again?" Sasuke asked, something strong in his words.

"Huh? Of course! Nothing can stop me, believe it!" he assured. They were forming a plan, without me. Maybe I wasn't needed. No—not even maybe—I just wasn't needed…

They started again and Sasuke shouted for Naruto to get out and attack from the outside. Haku would have none of that. The plan was smart; Sasuke would nail Haku with a fireball the moment he went after Naruto… but Haku was Haku, it wasn't going to be that simple.

_Maya's breath hitched and I saw blood pouring rapidly out of her stomach where my bastard father had cut ruthlessly into her back. For a moment, all was still. Her eyes were wide like my own, her blood stained my clothes. _

"_DON'T GET IN THE WAY!" he slurred, brandishing his bottle at Maya. "I OWE THAT BITCH A LIFE'S WORTH OF PAIN! AND NOW MY OWN DAUGHTER COMES TO HELP HER! YOU LITTLE TRAITOROUS WHORE! I'LL KILL YOU BOTH!" _

Naruto tried to get out of the dome again, but I didn't see him do it. Haku wanted it all to end and still Naruto tried, egged on by Sasuke, who was catching on to Haku's moves.

I heard none of it.

And the needles that soared toward my comrades, perhaps leaving me forgotten.

I felt none of it.

Chakra boiled in my system and I did not notice that my attempt to release it had set a shield in front of Sasuke and Naruto, protecting them from the short onslaught of needles. I did not hear, I did not see, I did not feel, I did not notice and yet I had protected them in my rage. The technique normally drained my chakra, but I didn't notice that, either.

'Bastard, bastard, bastard. Your own daughter. Not just me, but Maya. Maya the innocent, the lamb, the angel. Kill the demon, not the angel; the angel doesn't deserve to die. Bastard, bastard, bastard. I'll kill you for touching her, I'll kill you!'

Needles flew into me.

Was I standing or sitting? Had I fallen? I think I was pushed. By Sasuke, maybe Naruto? I was numb. Sakura screamed and I didn't hear it. Naruto sounded worried and I couldn't think why. I heard Haku utter the word, "Sharingan," and the only thing I knew was that it was red. But the sharingan was not mine… it was Sasuke's… I knew that… somehow.

'I hate you, I hate you, I hate you!'

My entire body burned.

I knew something was coming, something bad was about to happen. Somewhere in me, I knew Haku was going to target Naruto, I knew Sasuke was going to protect him. I knew Sasuke was going to fall. I knew, I knew, I knew. But I couldn't move, couldn't breathe, couldn't scream. Déjà-vu. Painfully familiar. My body shook and heaved with a sudden heat.

'Maya, no. Maya stay. Please, Maya, no! God no. Not her, anything but her. My soul, my heart, my life, but don't take my light. No, please, no. Maya, stay with me. Please stay. Don't leave. I want to covet your innocence, protect it, and cherish it. Protect you, covet you, and cherish you.'

It felt like I was on fire.

"_I-I love you, Yuki" _

I could see her; she was right in front of me. She smiled. But this, this wasn't a memory. It couldn't have been. Her pale hair was so real, her blue eyes lit with love. I reached forward, tears of disbelief welling in my eyes. She grabbed my hand, I felt her. My god, I felt her. I was numb for a moment, and then-

"_Thank you, Yuki." _

She stepped away. Everything froze. It simply stopped. Or were they just watching me? Haku should have been attacking Naruto, but he wasn't moving. A flake of dry skin peeled off my hand and flew away. I was on fire. It engulfed my entire body. I felt strong, high with power. My back arched in the ecstasy of it. I felt whole, more then whole—it was amazing. Emotions I'd buried came back from their graves and filled me until I felt strong. It was like a piece of me had awoken, the passion that had been robbed from my eyes, I'd stolen it back. Never before had I felt so utterly powerful.

My katana pulsated at my side, reacting to the power… or the fire… or maybe both. Or maybe, maybe it was reacting to Maya; the stone on its hilt, her birthday gift. Maya. My eyes flew back to her. She was still there. Everything was all right. I was strong. Maya was here. All I knew was passion and fire. The power was further building. I felt I could take on anything, the world. Incinerate all that stood in my way with the fire that came in licks off my skin. So much power felt I could burst and then… and then…

"_Don't forget." _

Pain. White hot and searing. I was blinded by it. I staggered and my fire ebbed. My legs buckled as everything was drained from me, slipping away in the same ghost-like speed with which it arrived. I was weak. I felt my lungs fill with fluid that was not supposed to be there. Had I been struck down by Haku? No. No, it was something more. The world was moving again; Haku towards Naruto and me towards the ground. I choked up more blood and my stomach split as I hit the floor. An old wound causing more issues. It hurt, it hurt, it hurt.

'Too much,' I realized. 'Too much power. I couldn't handle it. My body couldn't handle it.'

I felt so hot but I was sure my skin was cold. I was not sweating as I should have been. I rolled myself onto my back where my stomach would not be stretched.

"Sasuke… Angel…"

It was Naruto, I knew it was him. But I couldn't open my eyes. I was still seeing white, so it didn't matter. I felt incredibly lightheaded, like the first time we'd fought Zabuza, but worse. I knew I was losing more blood than then. It was harder to breathe, I choked on every gasp. And then it occurred to me.

'Why don't I just stop?'

I wouldn't have to gasp for every breath as blood filled up my lungs if I just stopped breathing. Somehow, that all made sense. Breathing had become a problem,

'I should stop doing it.'

Black was creeping at the edges of my vision and I didn't fight it. My brain was receiving less and less blood by the minute. Please forgive me, but the darkness was very, very welcoming. And somewhere in the black, I could feel her. I couldn't see her. No, not just yet. My breathing slowed and I relaxed into the darkness. Somewhere in that black, I knew there was Maya.

**A/N** Okay I'm gonna cut you off there. I played a bit on cruel humor for this chapter, I hope you enjoyed it. Jeez, Yukari sure seems to pass out a lot. She should really get the stomach wound looked at. And yes, for those of you who refuse to believe, Yukari has, in fact, STOPPED breathing! I know the chapie wasn't that funny, but I had to do something dramatic. It's on a whim, but I think I know where I'm going with it.

Next time, on Fuck, I Think My TV's Broken: Blood, tears, memories, heartbreaking speeches that make ya wanna cry, angst, more blood, more tears, Kanoke's not gonna give Yukari up without a fight, but she may not have much of a choice. Next time: conclusion to the Water arc in Chapter 11: Don't You Dare!

PLEASE REVIEW! Love Love!


	12. Don't You Dare!

**A/N:** Hey everyone! I know it only took my, for freaking ever, to update but a lot's been going on. The anniversary of James's suicide has come and gone. For those of you who care, please take a moment for him. My birthday has also past, along with that of two of my sisters and a few of my friends. Finals were a real bitch, I'm telling you. I passed them all though, apparently. Though summer is here, I only have access to a computer every other week. Sorry about that. ANYWHO! I left you at a bit of an odd spot last time, didn't I? So, without farther delay, please enjoy your time and if you can take a moment to tell me your favorite part or give me ideas, both are intensely appreciated. LOVE!

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Naruto… I want to own Naruto… But I don't own Naruto... cries I need ice cream… and chocolate… and strawberries… mmm…

**Chapter 11**

**Don't You Dare!**

**(Tell me nothing ever counts. Lashing out or breaking down. Still, somebody looses cuz there's no way to turn around…)**

**-- Demon of the Mist --**

"Are those your genin, Kakashi? Is that your quickest tongue, your fastest to find a weakness?" I asked, I knew the answer to the question, but the situation was something I found myself genuinely curious about.

Beyond Haku's ice mirrors, so much hate and killing intent radiated I was amazed. The others in the dome didn't seem to notice the change, but it was so painfully obvious to me that I would be very surprised if Haku had missed it at all. The raw power pulsed like a thick wave of energy and burned like a forest on fire.

"Yukari," I heard Kakashi whisper, whether he was aware of it or not. I knew how desperately he must have wanted to go to his student and still couldn't make myself care.

"You know, Kakashi, maybe I was wrong. That little genin of yours, she might have it, the instinct to kill." I'm not sure what it was about this situation that I found so incredibly funny, but I was laughing again. Cruel? Yes. Sadistic? Certainly. But still not without humor. But the look in Kakashi's widening gaze was worth it.

"I expected more of you Kakashi. Did you really miss it?" I asked, already knowing without a single doubt what his answer was.

"What do you mean, Zabuza?" he countered.

I took a brief moment to muse over how different my name had sounded on her lips, as if it had had more meaning. She made it sound like a threat, like saying my name was something unexplainably special. Kakashi just made it sound like a name, granted, cautiously said, but still nothing I hadn't heard before.

"You know exactly what I mean, Kakashi," I dismissed with another laugh. "It's in her eyes, you can see it!"

"I don't know what you're talking about." But it was so blatantly obvious that Kakashi didn't believe his own words, I wondered why he tried to deny it at all.

"Sensei?" the other female asked. Perhaps she was why Kakashi tried, but really, she'd proven herself so worthless already that I hadn't even bothered to learn her name.

"So the great copy ninja hasn't seen it," I said, not for one moment believing it. "Those red eyes. She has the eyes of someone whose seen death; seen it, delivered it, maybe even enjoyed it. But she sure as hell doesn't regret it, I promise you that. Don't try to deny it, Kakashi," I demanded, for I saw the fierce rebuttal rising within him. "She said she'd have killed me straight off instead of leaving me alive, and there's no doubt in my mind that she meant every word.

"Normal kids don't act that way in response to death. I bet her upbringing was fucked up. She was either an orphan, neglected, or her parents beat her. Maybe a little of all three. But you didn't see it, Kakashi. I didn't make the wound in her stomach. Wonder who did. But you didn't do anything. You didn't notice. You overlooked it, like something that would just go away. Bet it kills you right now to know it's gotten this far.

"It scares you, doesn't it, Kakashi?" I taunted. "She could go either way from here. Be the good little konichi, loyal to her village and all that pointless crap. Or she could become just. Like. Me."

"No…" The little pink-haired girl whispered. "Yu-Yukari-chan would never… she'd never…"

"Don't you worry about a thing, brat. When all of this is over, you're precious Yukari won't even get the chance. Pity, I'd love to take that bet," I smirked.

-- --

And when Yukari collapsed, when her heart stopped…

Even the demon of the mist was disappointed.

Even his apprentice noticed through the attacks.

Even the kyuubi jailer felt the sheer wrongness of it.

Even the hyuga heiress dreaded the cold chill that ran up her spine.

And even, miles away, violet eyes of the liar widened in abrupt and completely unfamiliar panic.

-- --

It was annoyingly bright. That was the very first thing I noticed about death. Shortly followed by how ironically cold it was. In my defense, my thoughts were clouded, as though coming through a fog, thick like, like… pea soup. I've never eaten pea soup for this very reason, among other… more embarrassing ones. It was all very anti-climactic, my annoyingly bright afterlife. No light at the end of a tunnel, no incredible feeling of bliss or pain, depending on where I was supposed to end up. No, it was something more like turning on the lights in a white room. A very empty very white, white room.

Hell is white. Not quite what I'd have imagined, I'll admit, but also terribly effective. If I could move, I'd never know, for all I could feel was the constant chill, and if I'd already moved I'd have no proof for everything was white.

As far as my appearance here goes? The hell if I know. I must have some form left. I mean, come on—I'm freezing my ass off here. But I couldn't see it, all I could see was white and I knew should I ever see anything else I would never appreciate verity more.

I was numb, cold, and in all likeliness, unable to move. No sound occupied my personal room in hell, and I suppose I was less alarmed than I should have been when I concluded that I wasn't actually breathing anymore.

But, for the life of me, I just couldn't remember how I'd gotten here. I vaguely remembered the fight at the bridge, but I wasn't entirely sure if that was real. More than likely, it had all been a coma-induced illusion and I was here because I'd finally died. But stronger than anything else, I felt I was looking for something. Like I'd been expecting to find something in this horribly white place. It gave me that nagging suspicion that it was sheer foolishness that brought me here. Like I'd done something incredibly stupid, like willed my self to stop breathing. But I wasn't that stupid, right?

Right?

-- **Kanoke** --

Because I'm scared when she's not with me. The skies are always clouded, the snow is always cold, the rain can come without warning, and in the darkness, something moves. It's scary here at night…

I don't think they can see me, not just yet, anyway. I still do my best to be quiet, cuz I still don't know what they are. But they fill me with complete dread and I never want to find out. The clearing where the logs are placed is the safest place I know. It's the place where Yuka always meets me. Yuka makes the shadows hide. The place is beautiful when she is here because I can take the time to notice, because Yuka protects me so I don't have to worry.

I've thought about conveying my feelings on this place to her, but I can't seem to make myself do it. She feels that I am safe here; I'd love to be that confident about it. I cannot tell her because I do not wish to be a burden. In truth, this whole thing is probably the best thing for Yukari right now. This getting away, this distraction, this fresh start. It's what she deserves. She's never gotten what she deserved if you ask me; one bad thing after another is more like it.

_She was deep in thought when I first saw her that day. Arms folded behind her head in a carefree fashion that didn't fit the expression on her face._

"_Yuka!" I called out._

"_Hm? Princess?" She peered over at me, having just noticed, that wasn't like her at all._

"_Where are you headed, Yuka-chan?" I asked._

"_Oh, I'm doing the ice cream thing." The 'ice cream thing', it was a necessity for Yukari, her own personal drug. _

"_Can I… can I come, also?" I didn't want to burden my savior, that's what she was._

_She shrugged. "Do what you like." I stared after her for a moment and then ran to catch up._

"_What time do you have to be home?" I asked, still not comfortable enough around her to be in total silence._

"_Oh, uh, I guess I don't really have a curfew anymore." I blinked at the words, they sounded surprised, even from her lips. _

"_Really? Wow. That must be nice." She grimaced and I didn't understand why. "What's wrong, Yuka?"_

"_Nothing, I guess. It's kinda weird, that's all." As long as I'd known Yukari, I'd never known her lie before, but her answers were sometimes even more bothersome. "But if you want to see me again, odds are I won't be at my house."_

"_How come?"_

"_Father and I have come to a… mutual agreement that it's best if we don't see each other anymore," she chuckled._

"_He kicked you out!?"_

"_Hey, now!" She looked offended and unclasped her hands to point a condescending finger in my direction. "Mutual break up, remember? None of that 'he' crap. What are you, sexist?" _

I can't tell her,because I love Yukari, I love her so much. She's my only family, my truest friend. I've tried before to tell her how incredibly grateful I am to her. For saving me that day, for letting me stay even though I'm so clearly a burden. But I can't seem to make her understand the gravity of it all; in the end, she just waves me off and says, "_Don't think I did it for you, at the time, all I wanted was to get across the bridge. So don't go thanking me for something I didn't even do intentionally." _

I sometimes wonder how she can think herself bad at all. And though I love her, I need to tell her. Next time she's here. It's getting darker, the shadows are more restless. By not telling her, I'm putting her in danger.

Thunder rolled overhead and I frowned, pulling my jacket tighter around me. I couldn't escape the sense of sheer wrongness. A little red flag waved crucially somewhere in the back of my mind and I grew weary of all that was around me. This very same flag had allowed me to evade the shadows for so long.

That's when it happened. A wave of heat blew me clear into the tree behind me, eliciting a groan of pain from me. 'Ow, ow, ow, ow. ITAI! My tooshie huuuuuuuuurts.'

I heard it before I saw it. Generally, when one thinks of fire, you think of the blaring heat and blinding light, but usually one forgets to mention what quite possibly had the most effect on me. It was loud. Blunt, yes, but also very true.

It cracked and roared with the fury of an animal both cornered and wounded, but also shoved trees to the floor in rubble, like a small child with a broken toy.

It was a tornado of pure fire, a pillar of red gold; tall as the skies until I could not see the top, thick and unyielding. But it was contained. It passed over the ground maybe 100 feet away and burned the trees to ash in its path. It traveled fast and ferociously, digging a wide black trench underneath it as it ran. It was power, contained but terrifying. And I stood there, not knowing what to do, for if its path were to alter out of my favor, I knew I could not out run it.

I stared transfixed at the flames and was shocked by what I saw. Standing in the center of the mad power was Yuka, my Yuka. She looked proud and strong, content, the most I'd seen her since 'the incident.'

But something was wrong, so much power. A pulse of heat rushed through the forest and blew my hair back. My eyes widened and somehow I knew that this wasn't right. Something was dangerous. Hate, I realized. I could feel the hate and it carved a feeling of dread in my stomach. That little red flag that waved its warnings suddenly became the weapon whacking away at my subconscious.

Suddenly, my Yukari doubled over in pain and screamed. She screamed and I felt as though my heart was going to wrench out of my chest at the sheer agony in her voice. Against my better instincts, I ran towards her, because she was my friend and I wouldn't let her be in so much pain.

"Yuka!" I called over the deafening roar. "Yuka, what's wrong!?" I was closer now, almost there….

With a deafening crack, something in the air shattered and I felt the forest shudder and groan just before the fire tornado exploded. It could no longer be contained by whatever had been holding it. Logically, the force of the blast should have killed me, but instead it sent me flying back into another tree just as the last one had.

It hurt, yes, but Yukari was falling and I couldn't get there quick enough. Fire ravaged the forest on all sides of me as I stumbled to the place where I'd thought she'd landed. My eyes watered with smoke and tears until I was stumbling blindly forward. I couldn't breathe, it was so thick, nor could I see. It got to a point where I was sure there was someone else standing with me in the smoke. It got to the point where I was sure I could see little Maya smiling back at me. But that was ridiculous, nothing more than an illusion created by smoke and debris. It was no surprise when I tripped. I closed my eyes in pain and hissed as my elbows scraped over the ice.

"Yuka," I whimpered. I opened my eyes and gasped, choking on the black smoke that was sucking up my oxygen. It took a full moment for me to decipher exactly what I was seeing through the ice. I was seeing Yukari… and she was dead.

-- **No ones prov. (Gasps) I know, right?** --

_It was cold and there was blood everywhere. _

"Sasuke-kun, Sasuke-kun, Sasuke-kun—" She muttered over and over again. The girl closed her eyes tight and wept over her teammate.

The man that stood over the two children shed a tear at the injustice of it all. These people were, after all, only children. Children that were supposed to fight and keep on fighting even as their friends died. They were children that, by 'shinobi law,' were never supposed to show emotion, the mission always came first. It seemed like a horribly cruel system to Tazuna, one that had spawned many ruined lives. He was secretly thankful that his was not among them. Oh no, there simply weren't ninja in Tazuna's little village, and for that, he was glad.

The bridge builder's eyes traveled away from the two children to settle on another. She lay alone with blood circling her body and bits of frost covering her hair.

_No one wept for Yukari Irenara's death._

Logically, Sakura could only take one at a time and she was a bit busy crying over Sasuke now, but the corpse looked… kind of lonely… and oh so very dead.

"Sakura…You're heavy," came a quiet moan, much to Tazuna's disbelief. Sakura lifted her tearstained face and found Uchiha Sasuke staring back at her. There was blood dripping from the corners of his mouth and his coal eyes were half-lidded and glazed, but still he was so very much alive.

"Sasuke-kun…Sasuke-kun!" she cried, throwing her arms around his neck.

"Sakura, that hurts," he complained quietly. But she would not move because she was just so incredibly relieved beyond words. So instead, she hugged him close and said his name over and over again.

He shifted beneath her and she pulled away as he sat up.

"No, don't try to move!" she insisted, but he did anyway, looking around in a sort of dazed disbelief.

"Where's Naruto…? What happened to the masked kid?" he asked, his voice still raw.

"Naruto's fine," Sakura said happily. "And the masked boy… he died."

Sasuke's head jerked up in surprise. "Died? Did Naruto kill him… or Yukari?"

"N-No I don't know the details, but it seems he protected Zabuza and well…" she stopped short and their eyes traveled up to meet were a dead Haku lied.

"I knew you could do it! You must have dodged Haku's needles so they didn't do any serious damage to you!" Sakura gushed.

Sasuke would have loved to believe that. Unfortunately, something nagged in the back of his mind telling him that, if Haku had wanted him dead, then he surely would be so.

"If only Yukari-chan had been able to…" Sakura's tears were coming in fresh waves and she felt a strong wave of shame that she'd been so happy only moments ago when there was still a friend she had lost.

"Yukari?" It came out as a question and now that Sasuke thought about it, where was the crazy Irenara? "What happened to…?" And he froze. He froze because he had realized Sakura's tears were so very real and that they were no longer for him. 'No,' he thought. His head swiveled around and stopped dead when he saw her. She was broken and bleeding… and, dear god, there was so much blood. Her eyes were closed, those crimson eyes. 'She can't be…' he thought. 'She can't die. I still haven't figured her out.' But even as he squeezed his eyes shut and re-opened them, she was still there. She was still dead. 'Yukari Irenara… not you too…'

-- **Me** --

'Oh my god, hell is soooo boring.'

/Maybe it's not hell./

'Hmm, purgatory?'

/I was gonna say limbo, but yeah…/

'I don't know if I believe in purgatory.'

/I don't know if I believe in hell./

My eyes widened and my head swirled to the voice, for the first time I realized I was not alone.

Looking at the other figure was something akin to looking into a mirror but, at the same time, very, very different. Our eyes were the same, crimson and sharp. But this person's hair—though black—was cut short and his face was angled in a sharp way mine had never been.

He was undeniably handsome and wore a cat-like smile on a curious face.

It was now, and now alone, that I made the revelation that I was sitting. There was a bar in front of me I had not seen, and it became annoyingly apparent to me that my very white hell was actually a very white bus.

/But really if it's not hell or purgatory, then where are we?/

_This was an accident  
Not the kind where sirens sound_

'Who…?' I didn't know how to ask the question really.

/Aw, you don't recognize me/ he winked at me, /Bubbles-chan?/

I was suddenly very aware that I could feel my face drop into a gape. My hands clenched and unclenched on their own and I felt that as well.

'You… you're here too?'

/Sure. It's nice to finally see the other me face to face./ He squinted at me in a comical way and I took the moment to have a very girlish sort of thought.

'Is this what I'd have looked like as a guy? Damn… not bad at all.'

A thin blush spread across his face and I found the entire thing incredibly amusing. /Y-yeah, thanks…/

'Why are you getting all worked up? You are me, right?'

/Ah, right. Of course I am. I'm not a bad looking gal either./

I quirked a small smile at this, but was not really embarrassed as he had been. I suppose I'd never really been one to show embarrassment, I'd locked it all away. That must be why he showed it where I did not.

_Never even noticed  
Suddenly we're crumbling_

'How long were you sitting next to me before you decided to speak?'

/Time…/ he mused with a cryptic tone. /Time is irrelevant here and oh so very important./

I raised a brow. Now why didn't that make any sense?

"_Yes, and you have wasted far too much time already."_ The voice came from a shadow holding onto a long bar that reached from ceiling to floor, a shadow that, in my opinion, had not been there before. It held absolutely no defining features, but it was male and I was plagued by the sense that I'd heard it before. "_Hell or purgatory, you cannot remain here for long, lest the bus reach its final destination."_

/Would you deny me time with my other half, dark one?/

"_For the sake of her life? That is what you risk by monopolizing what little time you have left._" That voice was so familiar.

The boy next to me took on a guilty look, but it was also sad, so very sad. /I would not risk her life, but there is just so little time./

'Can we not talk about me like I'm not here?' I scowled, they were, after all, being terribly rude.

"_I dearly wish that were the case."_ The shadow spoke again and, though I could not see his eyes, I was getting the distinct impression that, though he responded to me, his gaze was still focused on the male beside me.

/How are you here, dark one? Who are you?/

"_Now that really is irrelevant_." Amusement laced the shadows words but it was twisted and I felt sick at the sound.

_Tell me how you've never  
Felt delicate or innocent_

/Bubbles, I'm afraid this is your stop./

I turned to him and I was dearly confused.

/People are waiting back in the real world, you must go to them./

'Well then,' I started, standing from my seat. 'Let's get going, shall we?'

His face drew another guilty look as he entered the aisle with me. But I felt a tug at my hand and turned back around to face him. /I'm afraid I can't go with you…/ he admitted. /It's not like I'll never come back or anything but… it will take some time./

'What?' Did he actually expect me to leave him behind? He was a part of me, after all. And if staying on this bus killed you, which I was getting the distinct impression that's exactly what it did, then there was no way I was going to let a part of myself die; male or not.

"_Oh, but you must."_ The shadow said as though hearing my thoughts.

/Bubbles-chan… I will be there, when you need me most…Yukari…/ He pulled me forward into a warm embrace that I did not hesitate to return. Then he pulled away briefly and my eyes widened as our lips met. I gasped as he exhaled air into my open mouth as though to feed me life itself.

And I could breathe again as I had not been able to before and I leaned into the kiss as I greedily clambered for the air I had too long been deprived of. It was all so very strange if you think about it. Luckily, it wasn't very hard not to think about at that moment, for oxygen was filling my head in the most over-powering kind of way. But the kiss was short and sweet as he pulled away gasping, and it held a distinct goodbye that, even in my dizzy state, terrified me. How long could I last without my mental crutch?

/Someone has to stay on the bus ,Yukari/ he whispered burying his face into my neck, /and I won't let it be you./

_Do you still have doubts  
that us having faith makes any sense_

My elbow was jerked back and suddenly I was looking to the face of the shadow.

/She's coming, keep your pants on./ My male half growled.

I was sure now that this was the first time the shadow had given me his full attention because that was the first time I'd seen his very violet eyes. _"Get off the bus, Yukari. Just get off the bus."_ Dear god, his voice was familiar and I was sinking in a haze of violet. Everything was dark and it sounded as though we were going through a tunnel. I felt the pressure of his hand leave my arm as I walked forward. _"Just get off the bus."_

-- --

Sasuke Uchiha did not know how long he sat there staring at the girl's body and still nothing had changed in his expression. He could not seem to pull himself out of his disbelief, it just did not seem possible. 'Not her,' he thought. He had counted her as one of the strongest in their group. More focused then Sakura, Yukari had proven herself witty and useful. She was also more believable then Naruto, she held no record of ever being dead last and she was rarely ever clumsy the way the blond-haired boy was.

It just didn't make sense, from those among them, how could she have fallen…?

'But wait, she hadn't been ready for this,' he realized. Yukari Irenara had come with them today and she had not been fully healed. It had not been any clumsy gap in her fighting abilities nor any miscalculation that she had made that had cost Yukari her life, it had been them. They were the reason she was gone… 'It was our fault.'

And lying there covered in blood, with her hair splayed about her like a dark halo, and her crimson eyes closed, she looked just everyone else had… at the Uchiha massacre.

_-"Tch, you wish, ice cube." -  
_'I mistook you twice, first as an Uchiha, and second as a fan girl.'

_-"What is it about this guy you like so much!? He's a walking popsicle!"-  
'_And you were different._'_

_-"I want to fight you."-  
'_You surprised me in the most pleasurable_ way.'_

_-"You didn't really think I had gone, did you? Tsk, tsk, I promised not to leave ya hanging, didn't I?"__-  
_'I thought you'd gone for sure.'

_-__"Actually, sometimes I think I may be the only one to catch the point. Everyone else has to have it repeatedly stabbed into them till it practically draws blood."__-  
'_Your point of view was… interesting to say the least._'_

_-"That person I failed to protect…"-  
'_I glimpsed the you that lay underneath, and I found that you grieved behind your mask._'_

_-"Teammately: an adverb for something done in a way that shows/expresses a feeling of well being to a comrade and or teammate!" –  
'_You and your insanely fake words… words I had come to use myself.'

_-"How I hate that man."-  
' _I caught you as you fell and I found you hated behind your mask as well._'_

_-"You know, for a Popsicle, you're awful warm."-  
'_You were infuriating and insane and you never gave a straight answer I could work with.'

_-"And perhaps I should have been the Uchiha. Uchiha Yukari… hm kinda just rolls off your tongue, doesn't it?"-  
'_I have nothing to say to that.'

Sakura hiccupped over her sobs, which had died down considerably in her many attempts to regain her composure, but the sounds didn't quite reach any of the others. In the passage of time, which Sasuke was still unsure of exactly how long, Kakashi had joined the group. Following behind him was Naruto, who was in a complete state of shock.

"No, no, not you… not my Angel," the blond muttered. His hands shook and his body teetered dangerously on the edge of collapse. He had not held her as she had passed and that hurt him. He had not even known she was gone. And the Angel who'd never judged him, the Angel who'd come to care, the first person his age to stand by him as a friend, had fallen while he wasn't looking. "I wonder… what your goal was…"

_-"Oh! Yukari, Irenara Yukari. And you're Uzumaki Naruto, correct?"-  
_'Ours was a clumsy introduction.'

_-"Hey, orange man, you okay?"-  
_'You cared and it made me warm.'

-"_My talents are at your disposal should you need them, got it, Kit?"-  
_'You believed in me, that I was capable at something other than failure.'__

-"At your service! Hey, didn't I tell you to call if you needed my help?"-  
'And you came for me… just as you promised.'

-_"Come on Kit, let's get you to the hospital."-  
_'You took my hand and patched me up in a sincere way I wasn't used to.'

_-"Get down!"-  
_'You took me to the ground with you, like my safety was more important than your own.'__

-"Don't touch him." –  
'You risked your life for me… I never got to thank you.'__

-"I'm here… I'll always be… here." -  
'Liar, you're gone and it hurts…'_  
_  
Kakashi lowered his eyes feeling a heavy weight over his shoulders and back. He had failed again, he had promised never to let anyone on his team die ever again. There would be one new reason to visit the memorial stone when they returned to Konoha and Kakashi loathed that idea. But Yukari was foreign and still not well known amongst the villagers, he very much doubted many would be at her funeral. It seemed to him that he'd overlooked one too many things in the case of Yukari Irenara. And yes, because he was her sensei that really did make this entire thing his fault.

"She died a true shinobi's death," Tazuna grunted, perhaps hoping to bring them all some solace.

"You're wrong!"

Kakashi's eyes shot up, much like everyone else's, to light upon where the voice had come from. He was not sure how or why but even after death, one of Haku's ice mirrors remained, but this was not Haku's reflection. Oh no, this was a girl with lavender hair and pink eyes set in a devastated expression. A girl he'd never seen before.

"You have no right! Absolutely no right to say that! She's not dead, you hear me!?" The girl shouted pounding a fist against the glass, and there was so much pain there that Sasuke had to avert his eyes and Sakura choked over her sobs.

"Yukari would never, she'd never leave me," she continued and the group stared on in a sort of horrified fascination. "She promised, she promised Tanner and me… she, she- There's nothing great about death, there's no honor in it, there's never honor in it. You die protecting someone and that's a good way to die…? BULLSHIT! You got that?! There is no good way to die. Death is death and that's it!" Tears tracked their way down her cheeks as she bit out her speech and she never stopped pounding frantically against the ice wall. Her hands were bleeding but she'd never stop, not until the barrier between her and Yukari was broken. "Selfish selfish, all death is selfish. You just don't want to see that person die, that's why you saved them, and it makes you selfish, because now they have to suffer since you're gone!"

"Yuka saved me, she protected me. We're going to grow old and die together in our sleep! So, don't you dare! DON'T YOU DARE SAY THAT SHE'S DEAD! You don't know her as I do, she's stronger than that! So you have no right, you have no right to say that! In fact, don't even think it or I'll have your head! She-she doesn't, she doesn't deserve…" Kanoke's body trembled and she sobbed, leaning against the transparent wall. "Yukari…" Her knees buckled and she collapsed. A sharp shattering sound filled the air and in a sparkling mass of silver and blue, the mirror collapsed with her.

Sakura gasped, Naruto was gritting his teeth and crying, and there was something Kakashi was supposed to be doing right now, but he couldn't, for the life of him, remember what it was.

"Yuka, you promised," the girl started again crawling toward the fallen konichi, though the glass marred her hands and knees. "You promised you'd never hurt me. So get up, damn it. Get up and defend your name, because they're slandering it, they're saying you're d-dead and I know you're not." She reached out and grabbed Yukari's blood-soaked hand in her own. She held it up to her face, hunched over and cried. She cried loud and it echoed and tore at everyone who heard it. "Get up, get up, get up, get angry and start screaming, I-I won't even tell your psychiatrist I p-promise. Y-Yuka I sorry, I'm so sorry, I know you want to be with Maya, but let be selfish, please, please Yuka I'll never ask for anything ever again, I promise. So just this once, my Yukari, let me be selfish, just this once. Yuka, don't leave me!"

"Kano? … How the hell did you get here?"

Sakura fainted, Sasuke was STILL in shock, Naruto almost collapsed, Tazuna gaped, Kakashi gaped with him, and somewhere in town, a man got mad, instead of getting glad, and his wife threw him out of the house, he will be sleeping on the couch tonight. Over tuba wear? No, over glade wear, apparently there's a difference.

Kanoke's eyes widened. "Y-Yuka?' she hiccupped, daring a look towards her friend. Red eyes starred back at her with an intensely confused look outlined in innocent curiosity that spoke volumes on how clueless to the situation she really was.

"I-if I hug you… will you die?" Kanoke squeaked, barely restraining the urge.

"D-Dunno, let's give it a try."

And Kanoke flung herself at Yukari.

"OW! SON OF A WHORE!"

"Oh my god, Yukari I'm sorry! Are you okay!? Don't die!"

--**My prov. Cuz no prov. Is hard and confusing to write, so deal with it**.--

"I already told you! You can't go in! She needs to sleep and recuperate!"

"But I brought flowers."

"Yes and they're ugly, now leave!"

"You have no taste. Orchids are lovely flowers with fantastic meaning."

"You speak flower?"

"Among other things."

"And that's why you're gay."

"Why do you get to go in?"

"Because I'm better then you, now shoosh it!"

I opened my eyes and blinked in confusion. What was going on? Was this Tazuna's house? It certainly didn't smell like Tazuna's house. I thought for a moment and came to the conclusion that I'd passed out on the way home. My face burned with embarrassment in a way that was somewhat alien to me. Was I… was I blushing?

'I don't blush!' I thought frantically. I waited for a response to come, but my mind was silent and it unnerved me. 'So you're really gone…'

"They've been like that for awhile now." My head snapped to the corner where Kakashi stood, eye smiling down at me. "Seems your friend Kai found out about your condition. He was kind enough to bring flowers!" There was something creepy about Kakashi, but I just couldn't place it.

"Oh… Kano won't let him in, I suppose?" I mused, vaguely wondering if they'd blown my cover in they're squabbling.

"Oh trust me Yukari-chan, he's already been in." His eye crinkled more, so I guess that means his smile grew.

I blinked at him then, much to my astonishment, I noticed for the first time the fantastic orange roses at my bedside. But that was not all, oh no. There were carnations by the window shimmering in the ghostly light provided by a high moon. Begonias on the floor craned around each other in the strangest way, and flowers that may or may not have been hibiscus, littered the edges of my bed. Tiny Fluer De Lises, which I'd once seen in the neighbor's garden, hung from various places on the walls, and whatever a gloxinia was, was there too. Behind Kakashi's ear, there was what looked like a red camellia, which was too odd to even comment on, and in my hands was a little white chrysanthemum and I had no idea how it got there.

"Well, that's interesting," was all I could say. The flowers where beautiful, there were just SO many of them. Had Kai brought these all? Where had he gotten them?? A small picture of Kai, whistling a happy tune while ripping up peoples gardens, floated around my head and I couldn't stop myself from grinning. "Very interesting."

"Indeed." No wonder it didn't smell like Tazuna's house, the room was covered in flowers.

"Yukari-chan, can you hear me!?" Kai called.

"Shut up, you idiot, she's sleeping!"

"No she's not, you're incessant screeching must have awoken her by now."

"Excuse me!?" Kanoke fumed.

"You're excused." There was a shuffling sound and then…

"I told you, you can't go in!"

"How do you feel, Yukari-chan?" Kakashi said. I thought about my condition for a moment. I did feel quite a bit better. I was all bandaged up and everything. I was so stiff though, I must have been asleep for quite some time.

"It hurts to breathe." I said at last, feeling that he should know.

"That's to be expected. You inhaled in a large amount of blood and fluid that are caking your lungs as we speak. You almost drowned it. Since it's not in constant creation like say, pneumonia, it should be fine until we get home, however the stiffness in your lungs my make breathing a rather uncomfortable act. Just don't stop doing it and you should be fine."

I pouted, having already done it once, I was in no condition to be offended. "And this itches," I reported again. There was a huge band-aid on my cheek that, aside from probably looking hilarious, also itched like a real bitch.

"Keep it on anyway."

I deadpanned.

The door burst open with a loud, "I win!" and strong arms wrapped around my stiff form. "Yukari-chan, it's good to see you're awake." The sentence came out soft and my head spun at how fast his mood had changed. He pulled me against his chest from behind and buried his face in my hair. Poor guy, I wonder what I smell like after all that. Blood and anesthetic, I'd wager.

"I brought you flowers."

"I can see that." I laughed quietly and he grinned.

"How did you get past me!?" Kanoke asked in disbelief as she, too, entered the room.

"Now that is… a secret!" he answered, smiling.

"I forgot how much I hated you."

"I forgot how much you whined. You're acting as if I kicked your puppy or something. We haven't seen each other in so long and yet this is how you treat me? I'm hurt, Kano, truly I am," Kai said sarcastically, lifting me into his lap and somehow not agitating any of my wounds. I was completely lost to the conversation at this point.

"That's Kanoke to you, buster, or even better, Hanram-sama," Kanoke stated, crossing her arms over her chest. She's changed since I'd seen her last. She was clean and her hair was wet. Probably the only reason Kai had been allowed entrance to my room was that she was in the shower at the time. She wore a pair of purple crappies I'd never seen before and a white T-shirt that was too large to be hers. "Now let go of Yuka, you pervert!"

"Has your sexual preference changed since the last time we saw each other?" he asked, not in the least bit heeding her command.

"I hate you."

"No, you don't." He grinned again, resting his chin atop my head and successfully making me feel like a five year old, though that could be due to the incredibly large button up shirt I was wearing… whose shirt was this?

"I suppose I'll leave you all to your devices," Kakashi started. "Yukari?"

"Hm?" I looked at him from his new spot by the door.

"We'll be leaving in the morning. It's a long way, but you and Sasuke are going to be anemic for some time. So just rest up, okay?" I nodded and he smiled and left the room. Kanoke visibly relaxed, but I could tell she was still pissed off as she marched over to Kai and me.

"Don't pretend to be so familiar with Yuka!" she whispered harshly.

"I don't see her objecting," he countered.

"She's injured and tired. I don't expect her to be in the-"

"Can we not talk about me like I'm not here?" I asked, the words feeling incredibly familiar on my tongue.

Kanoke sighed and took a seat at the edge of the bed. "Okay, look, Kai and I talked it out. Apparently, these people think you've known each other for a long time and since you're going along with it, I didn't object."

"What I didn't expect was that you weren't the only one to get sucked in through your TV," Kai explained with a grimace.

"Yuka… um, how much did you tell him?" Kanoke looked intensely uncomfortable and I squirmed out of Kai's hold to find a colder spot on the bed.

"He's from our world, Kanoke," I said, as if that explained everything. She didn't seem to understand that it really did explain everything.

"And you trust him?" she muttered. Except, I realized, it didn't really explain that.

"I trust him enough." Kanoke and I stared at each other in a long pause before she finally lowered her gaze.

"Alright," she whispered. "But, I still don't like you," she shot at him.

He smiled. "You're entitled to like or dislike whoever you wish," he agreed and Kanoke crinkled her nose as though that answer bothered her. "Yuzu misses you, she'd like to see you again before you leave."

I blinked. Come to think of it… "Where is she? You didn't bring her last time, either." He smiled at my concern in a warm way.

"We're staying with a man named Echiru Hosonke, he's not so bad—a little creepy looking, but he owns a small grocery store in town. I haven't seen his wife yet, but I think she's staying with their daughter… Nina, was it? Yeah, Nina. Don't worry, I left Yuzu in capable hands, it's far too late for her to be awake, anyway."

I felt like laughing, there were too many coincidences in that sentence for my liking.

"Anyway, I was thinking I could stay here for the night, you know, keep you warm and-"

"Absolutely not!" Kanoke stood up. "Out!" she commanded, literally throwing Kai out the door and dragging him across the living room. He gave me a wolfish smile and waved as she pulled him out of sight.

"I'll come see you off tomorrow!" he promised.

I shook my head, letting myself laugh a bit, and Kanoke stormed back into my room.

"The nerve of that man!" she fumed. "I hate him!"

"No, you don't." I smiled and she deflated a bit.

"Well… I dislike him strongly," she said firmly.

"Kano… how did you even get here?" I asked. The question had been bothering me for a while now.

"I came through one of Haku's ice mirrors," she said. I raised a brow in a way that suggested she continue. "Um, that's it…" She sweat dropped.

"What?" I twitched

"That's it. I was looking into one of the frozen lakes and all of the sudden I could see you guys. You looked pretty dead and I freaked, the ice smashed, and boom, Naruto World," she said. I could tell there were large gaps in her story, but I knew she wasn't lying. Whatever it was, it must have been either unimportant or too bizarre to even mention.

"And what did you tell my teammates?" I asked, scratching irritably at the giant band-aid on my cheek. She gave me a funny look that was stuck somewhere between thoughtful and bewildered.

"Your teammates…" She looked like she was about to ask a question, but she let it be and continued with her answer. "I told them… the truth, mostly. I met you a couple of years ago, sometimes I look into mirrors or glass and I see things. It's not really a lie. Recently, I have been seeing things. I said I saw you in the 'bathroom mirror' freaked out and then it shattered and I was there. I'm not entirely sure how it happened, which is also very true. Oh, and, if they ask, I'm from Kumogakure or whatever." She said.

I nodded hesitantly, assuming the lie had originated from Kai. It was a smart lie. According to Kai, he'd lived in an orphanage there for quite some time before leaving; that would set the grounds for how he and Kanoke had met. Kanoke had lived in an orphanage as well and no one was going to come looking for her. I wondered if I was supposed to be from Kumogakure also, and I contemplated telling Kai's story to Kanoke.

She crawled under the covers next to me and I reluctantly dismissed the idea, it was not my story to tell.

"Don't tell him I said this… but… the flowers are really pretty," she admitted. I smiled softly at her.

"Yeah…"

"I wonder what they mean…"

"Mmm…" I was already dozing.

"You've really gotten attached to them, haven't you, Yuka? Your teammates, I mean."

"S'pose I have," I yawned.

"Thank you for coming back to me," she whispered curling up next to me.

"Don't go thanking me. A bunch of losers… threw me off the bus."

"Heehee, you must be really tired, I'm just happy your still here," she giggled.

"I'll always come back, Kanoke, there's only one way someone like me can avoid hell," I muttered.

"Oh? By being good and getting into heaven?" she asked smartly. But I smirked and even in the dark, she saw it and it confused her.

"A'course not, I've just gotta watch my health," I continued.

"Watch your health?"

"Mmm hm, watch my health… and never die."

--**Not my prov.** --

'I have to go to the bathroom' was what finally made me get up.

_It surprised me how worried about her I'd been. But I shouldn't have been too surprised, we'd all thought she was dead, we'd all been worried. Even Sasuke had gone into her room a few times when he thought no one was looking._

_I myself went in multiple times just to reassure myself that she was still breathing. Ridiculous, true, but it was still very helpful. And when all my duties had been completed, I made sure that I was with her until she woke up._

I looked around the darkened hallway with a cautiousness that had become habit, and decided that everyone was probably sleeping already.

_I'd come very close to loosing two of my students today. What kind of sensei was I? Not a very good one, that's for sure. _

_I had been wrong in the matters of Yukari Irenara, very, very wrong. I had assumed, that day when I'd seen her at the memorial stone, that because she had changed so drastically, she was perfectly able to take care of herself. And yes, seven years can do a lot to a person, but that didn't change the fact that she was alone. _

_What Zabuza had said earlier had shaken me more than I'd like to admit, for every word had been true. I too believed Yukari capable of death; I knew she had already seen it, at the very least. But unlike Zabuza, I believed that if she had been the one to kill Haku, it would have ruined her. _

_There were many things wrong with Yukari Irenara. The way she viewed life was wrong. The way she viewed death was wrong. The way she was alone was wrong. And the slow way she healed was very wrong. There had been too many things I had overlooked with her, just like every one of my students. _

_I've come to the conclusion that I got jipped in the matters of teams. Mine was a walking square of drama with a dysfunctional relationship. Sasuke's desire for revenge was reaching dangerous heights that I could no longer overlook. Naruto needed someone to guide him that wasn't too busy being a schoolteacher. Sakura needed a wake-up call in the biggest way. And Yukari, well-_

I froze, hearing voices in the room at my right. It had been quiet when I'd come to the bathroom, but now, going back to the living room, I could hear it. I could hear the soft tones of tired voices drifting from the room I'd spent too much time in already.

"I'll always come back, Kanoke, there's only one way someone like me can avoid hell," Yukari spoke in a lethargic way. Surely, she was exhausted.

"Oh? By being good and getting into heaven?" the other one spoke, Kanoke. I'd still not come to a conclusion on what to think of her.

"A'course not, I've just gotta watch my health."

"Watch your health?" _My thoughts exactly_

"Mmm hm, watch my health… and never die."

I grimaced and swept past the room.

_One thing was for certain. Things were going to change when we got back to Konoha, starting with where Yukari Irenara lived._

-- --

It was curious that I should walk in the shadows with no particular destination set in mind. I did well to hide my boredom, as was expected, for I had long ago taught my face to lie as I had my movements and my laughter. It was a dearly useful trait.

My sister was decidedly safe, but sleeping, and the object of my recent fascination was currently beyond my reach, which irritated me far more then it should have. She made this town seem unbearably dull—the object of my fascination—and it served to annoy me, for I had been content with the place before I'd met her.

I was by no means stupid; I knew the 'right' thing to do in this situation would probably be to go about my life as though I'd never met the startling konichi. But I had never needed to remind myself that I was also by no means a 'good' man, so really, what obligation did I have to do the 'right' thing? It was a rare occurrence to find something that interested me, and I had absolutely no intention of letting her go.

It was going to be difficult, for I knew they watched me from the shadows. Many were unloyal, for I had yet to call upon them as I had done the others. And they would wait… those annoying servants of darkness who had yet to find their rightful place. They would wait and they would watch ever so diligently for the slightest weakness, the smallest flaw in my defenses so that they might bring me down.

She was a perceptive girl, but she didn't particularly seem to care what side I was on. It was a flaw on her part, that she'd almost told me everything. My shadows knew my story, more so then even her, who'd heard the words leave my very lips.

But that was not what drew me to her, nor was it those eyes, which invoked powers of manipulation that wracked me with shivers of ecstasy. And it was not the bond we had, one that can only be driven between those who share the phenomenally rare experience of being ripped from what is normal into what is impossible.

No, those were merely benefits that I was all too happy to indulge myself with. The reason this girl drew me so effectively was that I could not, for the life of me, seem to lie to her.

Perhaps that is untrue, what's more accurate is that both my body and my mind protested so fervently that I not shroud her knowledge of me in falsehood that it manifested itself into the acute desire to tell her the truth. This had never happened before.

I am a liar.

I suppose I'd always known it, always been ready to deny it, should a person confront me. Lying was easy, like naturally produced saliva that poisoned the tip of my tongue with deceit in its truest form.

Yet a glimpse into those enticing eyes and my mouth ran dry of all those lies. A mere handshake given in the most formal of fashions, and my mind was stripped bare of all deceitful paths once so clear to me. A short challenge she presented me with, when she had met me word for word in a quiet dance over my sharp examination, and I found shocking and terrifying—yes, terrifying—truth bubbling to my surface.

Yes, I knew the best thing to do in this situation would be to turn my back on this girl, perhaps go out of my way to ensure that we'd never meet again. For I was by no means stupid, such a reaction to a simple presence was so incredibly dangerous in so many ways, I knew it would be right, wise, and best to get the hell out.

But it was a very rare occurrence that I'd find anything that fascinated me so, and I had no intention of giving her up, at least until I understood why she effected me so. Why that day of our meeting, I clambered so desperately to feed her so many half-truths that it seemed so incredibly insane. Why I couldn't lie to her.

Yes, it would be dangerous to the point of impeccably stupid to pursue Yukari Irenara, because goodness knows how diligently they watched me.

I peered down an unnaturally dark alley and smirked at them, because I knew they would see it and it would piss them off. I smirked at them and watched the shadows shift with violet eyes that glinted over the rims of my sunglasses.

Downright dangerous.

But what's life without a little spice?

And I laughed. And it was not a lie.

**A/N:** Muwahahahaha, I had too much fun writing this part. I know it's in a bunch of parts and that probably annoyed the hell out of some of you, but I really did have to bring everything together. The last part is my personal favorite; I bet none of you saw that coming, ne? Things are gonna start changing, not just because of Yukari, either, Kakashi is gonna make some changes also. And yes, this IS the conclusion to the water arc.

Next time on Fuck, I Think My TV's Broken: Illness, annoyingness, candy high, creepy people, character building, evil plots, half-truths, curiosity, and suspiciousness. It won't be long until someone starts asking questions. Yukari, whatever shall you do? XD Next time in **Chapter 12: Strangers with Candy**

Flower Meanings:

Orchid: Preciousness and Seduction.

Orange Rose: Enthusiasm/Desire

Carnation: Fascination

Begonia: Beware/Be careful

Hibiscus: Delicate Beauty

Fluer De Lis: Flame/Burning

Gloxinia: Love at first sight XD

Red Camellia: Unpretending excellence

White Chrysanthemum: Truth


	13. Shot

Dear readers,

I'm sorry I haven't updated in such a terribly long time. I also regret to tell you that this isn't another chapter. So I'm just gonna say it…

My friend Jacob Martin committed suicide, Tuesday September 30th 2008.

He shot himself in the head…

Another friend gone, I failed again.

Is it really too much to ask that I go one fucking high school year without one of my friends committing suicide?! That's fucked up! He was happy! They were happy people! He and James, with a fucking skip in their step! James hung himself and look at Jacob! Fuck I can't do this anymore! I'm tired of going to funerals and doing shit I shouldn't have to do at this age!

I'm so sorry Jacob.

I told myself that after James I would try so hard not to let it happen again. What a load of shit that turned out to be huh? God, I'm crying again aren't I?

He would have graduated this year you know. Could have fucking done something with himself! God knows he was actually such a smart guy and talented, oh god was he talented. He could have made something of himself…

How fucking selfish of you. You left us here to clean up your mess. To morn you.

My phone was always open you fucking asshole! How hard would it have been for you to have just fucking called someone?!

… Moron.

This morning I was all depressed and nostalgic and shocked as fuck. I should have written this then so it could be like James's. But right now I'm just pissed off. I'm crying cuz I'm frustrated and angry! You got that Jake! Fucking a!

Breath. Alright, I'm sorry. Look, I promise I'm still writing Fuck, I Think My TV's Broken. I've watched it develop since it began, watched my writing progress to what it is now. I'm not about to give that up. Everything's just been really… something. It's been really something…

So please be patient with me.

And for those of you that knew him… there wasn't any pain in the end.

And for those of you that ever thought of suicide, maybe the next time that thought passes through your mind you could just, I dunno, not. Because it's not fair. Because no matter what you think it IS going to make others miserable and it is in no way the answer to all your problems.

And for you Jacob Martin,

I'm sorry I wasn't good enough,

I'm sorry I failed you.

And may you rest in peace…

Amen…


	14. Strangers With Candy

**AN: **Hey guys I know it's been forever. So much has happened since my last update that you don't even know. It's been a regular fucking soap opera. And to top it off I could not for the life of me type out a satisfactory chapter 12. This is as close as it's gonna get. I accept that. One of my friends told me that if I didn't update soon she'd travel halfway across the US just to smash my face into the keyboard. I believe quite firmly that she meant every word. So Merry Christmas, Happy New Year! I'll try to update again before Valentines Day but don't hold your breath on that okay.

**From Last Time: **Um, I just wanted to thank you guys, Your support really meant a lot to me. Jacob was a good friend of mine. And his death effected a lot of people. He was going through a lot of shit, I know that now. I'm so sorry. But I will never forgive him for what he did. Not him and not James. Cuz there's no excuse. I know that I will never do it, too many people need me. And I hope to god that none of you reading this ever do. I've seen the place where people commit suicide. It's dark and lonely and painful. But the right person can pull you out of it if given the chance.

Title: yeah, Someone contacted me and said they'd delete my story because the title was 'inappropriate.' Tch. So after much swearing and disbelief I just took out the U. now that little fucker can't complain can they. (sticks out tongue.) Bite me bitch. ;)

Declaimer: Fuck it.

**Chapter 12**

**Strangers With Candy**

_(I __am exhumed, just a little less human and a lot more bitter and cold…)_

I'm a relatively reasonable person and Kai had done nothing to piss me off. Except flaunt his infuriating perfection at my Yukari. He made her laugh like that and it royally ticked me off. Every time his voice came out just like that, that black velvet tone with those hooded violet eyes, I felt as though tiny bugs were crawling all over my skin.

And I hated bugs.

Yukasha Kai's very presence made me paranoid and sick and yet somehow he had wheedled his way into accompanying us to the boat.

I knew I was not the only one who felt this way about Kai; for although Sakura had become quite smitten with him it was very clear that the Uchiha survivor would like nothing more then to send Kai's merry little tooshie right through a wood chipper. I did not know why Sasuke felt this way and frankly I didn't really care. It was for this very reason that I decided here and now that I rather liked Uchiha Sasuke and that we should be the best of friends.

Yukari on the other hand treated Kai like any normal person would treat an old friend. There were two things very wrong with this scenario. One, Yukari was by no means a normal person and Two, Kai was certainly NOT an old friend.

Couldn't Yukari feel it? Sense it like I had? Couldn't she tell that trusting this boy was nothing less then a perfect disaster?

'Apparently not.' I thought bitterly glancing to where his hand had settled on her waste.

'Back off." I wanted to snap. 'Yukari doesn't like being touched!' which was perfectly true. So why hadn't she said it yet? Twisted his hand like she would have done Tanner's. Why was her guard down? Why had she relaxed, for him of all people? It felt so wrong and it made me want to scream at the pair of them, because something warned me that he was tainted and not to be trusted. My little red flag was giving me a migraine that made me irritable and I shook with a barely controlled rage.

Summers Strom minded. He had been reluctant the let the boy close to his master at all. But he had, which was unfortunate for me because Kami knows how much easier it would have made my life if he had prevented it. Instead he stuck closely to the child Yuzu's side and it made me wonder about him. I wondered how scary Storm could really be. How viciously he would protect Yukari. If perhaps he'd chosen the girl so that he might tear her apart at Kai's first threat to his master.

But that was preposterous, he was probably by Yuzu because it was as close as he could get. With Kai on Yukari's right and the little girl holding her left hand it was relatively impossible to get too close without walking directly in front or behind them. But wouldn't it be strange if I was right? Maybe even alarming.

I kept my distance from all of them feeling that if I got too close to Kai I might not be able to stop myself from hitting him. I knew very well that unlike Yukari I did not have that perfect control over myself and before now I had never particularly wanted it. I had always thought that bottling things up was very unhealthy but I needed it now, I needed it to protect Yukari from Kai and maybe even, though it made me sick to think it, Yuzu.

Upon first meeting little Yuzu I thought that surely this was the reason Yukari trusted Kai so thoroughly so soon. Yuzu looked like Maya had the first day I'd met her. They smiled the same, and I recognized those smiles for the ignorance that lingered there. Despite what I thought of Kai, I had liked his sister on sight. But it soon became apparent to me that Yukari had trusted Kai, I mean really trusted him, in a way that had nothing to do with the little girl.

And that made it worse…

"Thank you. Because of you we were able to complete the bridge." Tazuna started.

I twitched slightly but found that the mans words were incredibly welcomed right now. Because that meant we'd reached the boat. And that meant no more Kai! Ah silver lining I knew you were out there somewhere!

I shot Kai a triumphant look and he smiled in my direction. He knew I didn't like him and I knew he didn't care. My stomach heaved.

"Don't worry! We'll come to visit!" Naruto announced to the grief stricken boy.

"You better.'" He answered weakly. "I'm not going to cry!" The boy suddenly shouted. "B-but Naruto, it's okay if you wanna cry."

"Inari, It's okay to cry. You're sad right?" Naruto was saying and I smiled at the pair of them. Because they were cute. Because Kai wasn't coming with.

"Time to go." Kakashi announced

Yukari bent down a hugged little Yuzu. "Yukari-nee," the little girl sobbed, 'Don't leave, you just got here…"

"It's not like you'll never see me again," Yukari responded with the softest smile I'd seen her wear in months and the exact words she'd said to Maya once upon a happier time. "Till next time ne, Yuzu-chan?"

Yuzu nodded and vigorously wiped away her tears on the sleeve of her little purple kimono.

"I suppose you have to leave, ne?" Kai pouted and I squirmed because I could not get away from him fast enough.

"Yes, I do have to go home after all." Yukari responded.

"Well then," he moved in and pecked her on the cheek…

My eyes sprang open and adrenaline shot through my blood.

HOW DARE HE!?!

I wanted to slap him. No I wanted Yukari to slap him, cuz even Tanner couldn't get away with something like that. Yukari playfully swatted him away as though this were nothing new and I knew I must be shaking in raw unadulterated fury.

The sooner we got away the better. And if I NEVER saw Yukasha Kai again, it would still be too soon.

------------------------------------------- ---- **Kanoke **---- ------------------------------------

"Yukari!" I called snatching up her wrist. I was not going to keep this from her. She was in danger and I wanted her to see how wrong her trust for Kai really was. I wanted to protect her like she protected me. "Why did you let him do that to you!?" I demanded desperately.

Her head lifted in mild surprise and I realized how waspish I probably sounded.

"Do what?" She asked. But no, my Yukari was not stupid. I threw her a look she could not have missed and understanding entered her gaze. "That harmless little peck on the cheek?"

'No!' I thought desperately. 'Don't say it that way. Don't pretend it wasn't something. Can't you see how close he's getting!?'

"What are you talking about? You nearly twisted Tanner's arm off the first time he did that!" I accused and I knew my voice must have been raising. Finally, finally her face shifted. She frowned and was serious like I needed her to be.

"Yeah well that was Tanner." She explained as she scratched at the band aid on her cheek.

"What's the difference between Tanner and Kai?" I demanded.

"Kai's Kai." She said. And there was that answer again. That one that had the hidden 'I trust him' at the end. I let my hand fall as if burned.

It wasn't natural. The Yukari I knew was paranoid. The Yukari I knew didn't trust people. She just didn't. And the Yukari I knew did NOT like being touched. What had happened? What had changed? My Yukari…

Kai had changed something in my Yukari, I was right. Something about him screamed it's sheer wrongness.

"I don't trust him." I said and I heard my voice crack but unlike Yukari I was not ashamed.

"I know." Yukari replied and her answer was expected, almost comforting. "I'm sorry." And she was.

I felt as if I could burst and I flung my arms around her and pulled her to me tightly, 'Stupid Stupid Kanoke,' I told myself. I could never protect Yukari when she was the one protecting me. And it hurt that I couldn't help. It hurt that I couldn't keep her away from Kai's darkness because it would have been wrong to try. Yukari could protect herself, it had always been so. Nothing had changed.

'Nothing has changed.' I told myself. It would be the first lie of many.

I could only hope we'd never see Kai again, but this hope too was tainted by his darkness. A fools hope, doomed from before it sprang.

"Be safe." I whispered, and I felt her grip on me tighten, for already our roles had switched and I felt as if her arms would protect me from the world.

'Nothing has changed…'

------------------------------------- --------- **Yukari **------------ ---------------------------------

Despite Kanoke's disturbing accusations I knew one thing for certain. I was dearly going to miss Kai. He was warm and he smelled like peacebloom and withered parsley. I had never let myself trust someone as I was suddenly trusting Kai. I loved the new feeling. I felt so much less alone now.

I sighed pressing my forehead against the cool bar that lined the boats edge. I was certain that I'd never been this tried in my entire life. I had slept a great deal but the walk had been uncomfortably arduous. My anemia had left me weak.

I spat into the water feeling disgusted with myself. Surely Sasuke wasn't feeling this pathetic and I knew he'd bled more than I.

I twisted to get a good look at the sulking Uchiha. Perhaps he really did feel as weak as me, he certainly looked pissed off enough for that to be the cause. I smiled at him. I owed Sasuke quite a bit didn't I? Yes, that boy had put up with quite a bit of my shit and I had used him more than once for my own gain. He was just so, so, useful.

I cringed. That sounded horrible of me. It wasn't like I had hurt him in any way or betrayed his trust or something. I was quite certain he didn't trust me anyway. He didn't even like me. Not once had Sasuke visited me on either occasion when I had been injured.

But he had been injured also and I had made sure to visit him when he had been sound asleep. It would have been really awkward otherwise. What was I supposed to do? Sakura had it easy. She could just walk in there throw herself on him and cry. But doing that would have been both impossible and extremely uncharacteristic. I had gone in when his breathing was slow and his eyes closed and had a quite conversation with an unconscious body.

Wow, I sounded like a freak. So I was hardly one to judge.

I sighed again.

I had made a mistake somewhere with Haku. I had planned to heroically save him from his fate and instead I had waited too long and suddenly the matter was out of my hands. If it had ever been in my hands in the first place.

I wasn't sure what had happened. A new variable had entered the scene in the form of fire and ecstasy. Whatever it had been it had left me drained, it had shut me down, and it had better not happen again. I couldn't risk going into flaming lockdown every now and then. I had things to do, people to see, places to NOT die. Whatever had happened with Haku, I hoped dearly it had been a one time thing. A mistake that had cost me his life.

I would not make that mistake with Sasuke. Not when Naruto loved him so dearly. Not when I could change it. There would be no mistakes this time. And if there were I would have a backup, like ten per action or something. There were millions of things I could do to change it and I had time. I would do every fucking one of them if I had to. If I could stop Sasuke from ever meeting that bastard… well, that might have been too much to hope for, but if I could be there when it happened…

I lifted my head and let it fall painfully back against the railing.

Fuck my stomach hurt like a bitch.

**----------------------------------------------- Sasuke --------------------------------------------**

If I were one to categorize my days I would have to say that today would fall under shittist day of the month. And that was including my birthday which Sakura had somehow found out about.

The root of today's rain started with Yukasha Kai, and ended with Irenara Yukari. I should not have had to go through breakfast sitting next to him and his gay jokes about my intentions with Naruto. I'm better than that. I should not have had to go through walking here with him and his complete infatuation with Yukari. It was annoying and he needed to keep it to himself. Honestly hadn't anyone taught him self control? For gods sake, I was the Uchiha Survivor. I shouldn't have to deal with shit like this.

But the real kicker was the goodbye kiss Yukari had received.

To say public displays of affection had never really appealed to me would be an understatement. I was the Uchiha heir and such behavior was completely unheard of in strong clan leaders. I knew my father had never done it… Itachi had never done it…

I scratched at the band aid on my cheek in irritation. Sure Kakashi may have gotten a good laugh out of the stupid matching band aids on my and Yukari's cheeks, but I swear on all that is holy I am THIS close to ripping mine off and throwing it into the water.

'Damn it, Yukari' I thought.

It was like Yukari had betrayed me. No not me, the team. Like she had betrayed the team by doing something so incredibly… weak.

I shook my head, still finding it difficult to connect her with the word. Even injured and sleeping after the fight with Haku I had seen her as something strong. Someone who had almost died because they had been foolish enough to try and get me out of that dome. She had even gone so far as drag herself out of bed to visit me.

_**Flashback**_

_I kept my eyes tightly shut when I heard my door open. If Sakura had come to visit me again she might decide to leave if she thought me unconscious. I didn't need her hovering over me asking me again and again if I was alright. I needed to be brooding on everything that had happened. I had lost to Haku and Kimi knows how much stronger Itachi was than Haku. It was infuriating how weak I still was compared to him. _

_The person in my room let out a loud sigh and I thought for sure that it was Sakura and this was her disappointment. _

_Then she spoke._

"_You're a bit of a moron aren't you?" _

_The difference between Sakura's voice and Yukari's was something I hadn't taken into account before now. Sakura's voice had something shrill to it and generally lacked confidence and self worth. But Yukari's voice drawled with the patient experience of someone who knew with perfect clarity what they were capable of. Neither was more pleasant to listen to then the other but Yukari's voice sent a draft down my spine. It appeared that there was one more thing she had in common with my brother._

"_You could have gotten yourself killed by protecting Orangeman. And then were would we be? Sakura would cry for the next year, Konoha would weep for the loss of their little Uchiha. And you, as Kit's first friend would have someone that would morn your death for the rest of his life. You could have caused a lot of problems by what you did." she berated._

_I wondered if she knew I was awake. Otherwise what was the purpose of this conversation?_

"_Thank you." She whispered out, and the shift in her voice was startling. Was she crying, I wondered. "I should have been the one to jump in front of Naruto. Or I should have jumped in front of you. And believe me I would have if I could have. I messed up and you paid the price in blood. I meant for everyone to come out alive. And that's a mission I should not have failed… This team needs you Uchiha, but it doesn't need me."_

_**End Flashback **_

My eyes shot toward her on reflex more than anything else and I frowned. Yukari was already asleep, using her little pet like a pillow. This was nothing new. She didn't bond, didn't even try. She didn't force conversation upon me as Sakura did and she didn't actually 'girl bond' with Sakura. But she wasn't exactly chumming up to Naruto either, in fact the only people I'd seen her actually hang out with was that weird Hinata girl and Shikamaru.

I, personally, had nothing against either of them. Hinata wasn't a fan girl, which I appreciated, and Shikamaru wasn't annoying, which was a rare godsend.

But we were her team. Did she really think us so horrible? A sneer crawled over my face. And these people, Tanner, Kanoke, Kai. Who the hell where they that she said their names as if it were normal? While for her it certainly was not. What did we know about her? Where did she come from? Who where her family? Where did she live? It wasn't adding up.

My knuckles turned white as they gripped the boat railing and I felt anger flush into my system. Anger at myself. Irenara Yukari was dangerous, she was hiding something. Scars that didn't heal, grief she didn't show, hate that didn't die, and creepy allies from other villages.

How the hell had she known Haku anyway?

I silently berated myself for being so worried about her. For actually checking up on her. She looked like a Uchiha and seeing her so close to death had been too much of a flashback. Surely that was all it had been that had caused me to worry about the girl with my brothers eyes.

'Damn it, Yukari.' I thought again.

I peeled the band aid off my cheek and without a second thought let it fall into the dark water below.

------------------------------------------------ Yukari---------------------------------------------------

The trip seemed significantly shorter this time. But then I did sleep through well over half of it. I could not for the life of me think of why we hadn't gone this far on boat the first time. I mean, for Christ's sake it was just so much faster. I did however have a theory. I had asked Kakashi this very question and he had just smiled and said, 'walking is such a hassle.'

If he was doing this for me and Sasuke I was forever grateful. Also slightly embarrassed that he'd probably noticed how the short walk to the boat had effected me so strongly. God I was pathetic.

"Yukari-chan." Kakashi called. "We're going to go and introduce the Hokage to our new resident." He said cheerfully. "I'd like it you and Sasuke could go to the hospital in the meantime."

That sounded reasonable to me.

I shot a look at Kanoke and she smiled and nodded which was as good as consent.

"That's fine." I said and Sasuke just grunted what we all assumed to be a yes since you couldn't really tell with the limited Uchiha vocabulary.

"Hey, Angel." Naruto greeted. "Good to be home ne?" he said grinning cheekily.

I gave him a surprisingly sincere smile. "And here you were all excited to get out of this place." I teased.

He took on a shyer look that was perfectly adorable on him. "Yeah well, no place like home I guess…"

"Hmm." I hummed thoughtfully as we passed through the gates. Naruto was surprisingly quite today which I just could not understand. I wondered if he were sad that there would be no one here to greet him back.

"I'm glad you didn't die Angel-chan." Naruto said quietly. "Back there on that field I thought both you and Sasuke… I though you guys had…" He choked and I smiled softly and put my arm around his shoulders like I had never done before. And then with all the sensitivity in the world I did what I do best in awkward situations.

I changed the subject.

"So Kit, I have a friend who can do the most interesting thing with her chakra." I smirked. "She can walk on water." Naruto turned to me with wide blue eyes, Hinata was going simply going to die when she found out what I had done.

------------------------------------------ ---------------------------- ------------------------------------

There are some people you like when you first meet them. There are other's you just wanna slap for being so goddamn annoying. This is a simple fact of life that I usually appreciated because it really did pertain to everyone.

Here's a fun fact: Uchiha Sasuke has fan girls… lots of fan girls. Fan girls who definitely appreciated the return of their obsession.

Another fun fact: I wanted to beat them all into the ground. Massacre actually, with lots blood and little fan girl parts leading a happy trail all the way to the Hokage Tower. The idea was becoming increasingly appealing actually.

"Uchiha." I shot between gritted teeth. "Isn't there something you can do about you're damn fan girls? I'm about to loose it and tear all their fucking heads off."

"Hn, be my guest." Sasuke replied. I rolled you eyes. I would have left his sorry ass way behind me if I had known where the hospital was. Sadly I didn't and I was secretly following Sasuke so that I didn't look like a total moron. Sasuke tensed beside me and I wondered if his fans were on the move again.

"Sasuke-kun!"

'Apparently so.' I twitched.

"I'm so glad you're back!" This one had brown hair worn in pigtails and blue eyes filled with creepy obsession that I was quite certain she'd mistaken for love. She was actually rather pretty. It was a pity she'd chosen to focus her attention on a walking popsicle. "I can't believe that mean old Hokage would make you go out of the village the week of your birthday! And I had such a wonderful evening planned!"

I choked, half way between laughing at the way she'd said 'mean old Hokage' and halfway between gasping that I'd forgotten Sasuke's birthday. Woopsy. I considered birthdays rather important, I would have to remedy this!

What could I get for Sasuke? This was a useful distraction that helped me ignore the tragic waste of female walking beside us. I suppose if all else failed I could by him a new stick to shove up his ass. A shiny one… with little jewels and his name engraved on it in silver. Hmmm…

"Anyway who is this girl you're with?" Something dark shot my way and I felt a shiver ripple up my spine that drew me out of my lovely fantasy. "Who are you?" She asked directly.

I seriously considered for a moment telling her that I was Sasuke's new girlfriend just for the hell of it, but after briefly playing the scenario out in my head I determined that the result would probably be different from that of a fan fiction. And instead of breaking her heart and saving us from future fans, I would probably be tied up and shipped off to Grass Country this very day.

"Fuck off." I settled for and her eyes widened in horror.

"Sasuke-kun! You really shouldn't be with people who have such fowl language! I hate to think what a horrible influence she'd be on our children!" She gasped.

I twitched. "Subtle as a flying brick." I muttered. Then a slow cruel smile crawled over my face.

'Sasuke I'm gonna do both you and me a huge favor.'

"Oh dear! Well children are another matter!" I started dramatically. "He didn't tell me he finally settled down. So you'll be the one then?" I asked. She looked at me in confusion which rapidly changed to fury as I looped my arm through Sasuke's. He tensed but seemed determined to ignore whatever the hell I was doing. What Sasuke would soon learn was that I only hated it when people touched me. What I touched them it was just funny. "Sasu-chan, you tease!" I pouted. "You're supposed to tell me about my in-laws and the cute little nieces and nephews they're gonna bring my way!"

Sasuke would have fallen flat on his face if I hadn't been attached to him. Which it was a good thing I was because this particular act didn't not involve him busting me.

"W-What are you talking about!?" The girl shrieked and I Xelloss smiled just for her.

"Why Sasu-chan and I," I paused because I could feel Sasuke shake when I came so close to his name. I wondered if he was angry with me. "we're family you see." I leaned my head on his shoulder and fluttered my lashes. I didn't know when we had stopped walking, but I was glad we had, because Sasuke surely would have tripped again.

"F-family?!" She stuttered.

I nodded. "I'm Yukari but the way."

"U-Uchiha Yukari!?" She stressed and I gave her a smile, perhaps a bit more evil then necessary. Her eyes widened farther in response.

"Kinda just rolls off your tongue doesn't it?" I said.

And suddenly her hands had clasped around mine and she had a sort of desperate look in her eyes.

"I-I'm Tsuki Ame and it's a pleasure to meet one of Sasuke-kuns relatives!" She laughed and the fakeness there made me drop my smile. She was a fool for not knowing that Sasuke had no relatives. She was a fool who did not care for the boy in the orange jumpsuit who suffered so tragically. Who did not care for the boy that I loved. She could not love Sasuke. I would protect my boys from her. "Let's be friends, you and I, ne?"

"Are you a ninja?" I asked.

"U-Um I'm in the academy still, I passed last exam but my team failed-" I deepened the frown and suddenly the girl looked worried.

"Weak." I spat, not caring that she'd heard me or that Sasuke too seemed shocked by the blunt admission. "I do hope you're training adamantly, I will not tolerate weakness in my family."

"O-Of course Yukari-chan."

"Too informal, we are not friends just yet." I informed. 'Never.' I thought.

"Gomen Yukari-san!" She bowed and I let the Xellos smile return, because it was a beautifully faked masterpiece that I had perfected over the years. A mask that would not soon be broken.

"You must work extra hard." I said patting her on the head. "I do not approve of you just yet, I'll expect you to have changed for the better when next we meet." She nodded fervently and I felt Sasuke squeeze my arm in his and knew it would only be a matter of time before he could put thought into words. "If you'll excuse me number 37,"

"Number 37?" she asked look dazed.

"Oh yes you're the 37th candidate for my Sasu-chan," He tensed again. "I will say your name when you have impressed me, till then we have somewhere to be." I tugged Sasuke's arm and he came without much resistance.

"R-Right! Goodbye Sasuke-kun, Yukari-san!"

"Good day number 37." I called behind us.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" Sasuke shot my way but he did not separate from me, which was good because Ame could still see us.

"Well you see, I was considering making out with you in the middle of the street but I figured that in the long run it would probably get me into a lot of trouble." Sasuke nearly tripped again. He wasn't very good at walking today, but he was silent so I continued. "Buuut it's like some sort of unwritten law during courtship to try and gain the families approval. So if she wants to get to you she'll be ridiculously nice to me and if she wants my approval that girl sure as hell won't hang on your arm when I'm there. In fact I think I may have just aspired that girl to be a better konichi. Everyone wins!" I explained enthusiastically. He still hadn't said anything and I was getting worried.

"Er, did you want her hanging all over you? I guess I should have asked, but I just assumed."

"No." He said simply.

"Alright then, I don't see a problem here."

"You think this is all just a game don't you?" He spat like something far too sweet for his taste. "You lied just to satisfy your messed up sense of humor-"

"Now now, I didn't lie Sasu-chan." He tensed again. "We are kind of a family you know." I said in a very matter of fact way. Sasuke froze completely and I tugged on his arm again to make him walk with me. "That's what it means to be part of a team. You're a part of team seven now, and we are your family." I said smiling as we turned the corner.

"Like hell. I have no family."

Something in that one sentence really ticked me off. Something about the blunt rejection of me and those I now held dear, infuriated me to a new height.

**He will betray you. **Something whispered to me. A voice far too sinister to be my other half.

'Oh hell no! I can change it!'

**This is out of your hands. It has been destiny since the moment he chose revenge. Everything in this world sets itself no matter what you do. You will change nothing here and you know it.**

"Look," I started in a softer tone and we stopped with Ame no longer in sight. Sasuke's face was hidden by his hair and I worried about what he might be remembering under those ebony locks. "I don't pretend we could ever be what they were. But we are something. Don't turn us away."

"Tch," a muscle in his jaw jumped and I knew what would come next would not be pleasant. "Stupid." He scoffed. I still could not see his eyes.

'How dare he!?' I thought, my chakra spiking

"Don't be a prick about this Uchiha!" I snarled. "Some of us would just kill to have a family so don't turn away from this offer. We ARE your family. I KNOW Kit and you have bonded, Pinky has potential if she can get over her damn infatuation with you, and years from now we'll still tack sensei on the end of Scarecrows name. Why are you the only one denying this!?"

"Well aren't you just the hypocrite." Sasuke bit back quietly, I still could not see his eyes. "How the hell do you expect us to trust you when you so clearly don't trust any of us."

"What are you talking about?" I asked. He leaned in and smirked but it was empty and it scared me because he shouldn't have that look, not until years after he left Konoha.

"Say our names. I want to hear it. Naruto, Sakura, Kakashi. Say our names Irenara." It was spoken like a mocking dare and I withdrew my hand as though burned and backed away from him and his terrifying smirk. He could not possibly know the magnitude of what he had asked of me.

"I- I can't."

And he was angry. "You are such a liar Yukari, and the thought of you and I being part of the same family is enough to make me sick."

I was quite for a moment. Still, shocked. But I knew before I tried that I would not, could not say Sasuke's name. And now I was angry. Angry that he had even asked it of me. How dare he.

"You have no idea." I hissed. "If you only fucking knew."

"Another secret Yukari?" He snarled and my pupils contracted in fury.

**You're going to loose him.**

'You lie.'

**You're window is closing and you're the one shutting it.**

'Liar!'

**Everything is falling apart.**

"Shut up!" I shouted closing my eyes tight. Power surged in me, hot and raw and there was a moment of ecstasy where I opened my eyes and I knew that Sasuke could not have missed it. Then pain, a small burst of agony. My eyes widened and I crumpled into myself while still standing, and hacked violently. When I opened my eyes again it was to see blood on my palm. My vision blurred. I had to leave.

I turned to flee but Sasuke caught me by the wrist. I would not turn to face him.

"I won't let it happen Uchiha. You're trying so hard to loose everything but damned if I let you break his heart!" There was a new strain in my voice and I hated myself for it. "You're in too deep. Whether you like it or not. If you left now… Naruto and Sakura would follow you to the ends of the earth." And it was true.

"And you?" He asked his voice quite. I wanted to look at him, but knew if I did I would tell him of the danger that was coming and beg him not to leave us so that I was here to pick up the pieces of a tragic little team.

I felt him tilt my hand but I drew back sharply, hoping that he had not seen the blood. And then I ran.

He did not follow.

**Everything will fall apart…**

-------------------------------------------------- -------------------------------------------------------

I stumbled my way to my Sakura tree. I had virtually no idea where the hospital was but for all my horrible healing abilities I was getting rather good at dealing with blood loss. I just needed to rest and think. Just for a little while.

It had happened again. Shorter and far less dramatic but I was curtain that it was the same. The power high, the ecstasy, and painpainpain. I frowned. This was going to become a problem if it continued. I could already feel the after effects running through my system like a drug. It was something I could easily become addicted to. I already felt weak without it. I already desperately wanted it again.

**Don't let it swallow you.**

I shivered at the very thought. Being consumed by it was a terrifying prospect. I needed to go to the hospital. But first I needed to rest. I would go when I could move and think coherently. Then I would find whatever room Uchiha Sasuke was in and I would beat him with a pogo stick because somehow this had to be his fault.

I hadn't realized how suspicious he was of me till just now and this could not have been something new. What was I going to do? What could I possibly tell him? Fuck. Could this have come at a worse time? I scoffed.

My eyes widened and I stopped in my tracks. I felt like I could cry. I had reached my Sakura tree… and all my blossoms were gone. Their time had passed. I wanted to scream. It was irrational and stupid that something so natural had set me over the edge. But this was my place, my special, special place. And death had graced it in my absence.

'I didn't even get to say goodbye…' I stumbled forward with my hand outstretched and begged the tears to fall. My beautiful sakura tree…I let out a choked sob a collapsed at its base wishing with all my being that I had just made it to the fucking hospital with Sasuke. If I hadn't done that stupid little trick with that fan girl none of this would have happened. Besides she was bound to find out sooner or later that I wasn't actually Sasuke's sister. And then I'd be in for a hell'va migraine.

Already my head was pounding.

I should have just kissed the damn boy and gotten over with it. How bad could Grass Country be?

It was a mark of how out of it I was that I didn't register the presence of another even after they were three feet in front of me. It was an even greater mark that I still could not make out the blurred form for who they were. They were male. I decided groggily.

**Focus your eyes. **The voice said urgently

'If you think you can do a better job you focus my eyes fucker.'

"This is it then," The person said lazily and I recognized that voice. He bent down towards me and still I could not see him clearly but neither did I tense. How unnatural.

"What happened to her?" Another voice came and now I did tense, though I was unsure of both their identities, this person alone made me tense. I tried harder to focus.

"I'm sure that's a long and very personal story. But if her condition bothers you, you don't have to take her. This is completely up to you." The first person said jovially.

'Taken? They're going to take me somewhere?' I thought and the urgency of the situation was dulled by how tired I was getting.

"It's fine." He grunted.

I heard immediate growling on my right. Storm. My beautiful, wonderful Summer's Storm was here. He was here to protect me.

"A dog?"

"I'm afraid so." The first person said though his happy tone had still not changed. "If she goes he goes."

There was a silence in which I almost fell asleep and then some form of consent was given and for some reason I could not fathom, Storm let the man in front of me pick me up.

**You're going to bleed out at this rate.**

'You just shut up for a while.' I growled.

I did not like this new voice that I had somehow contracted. The bubbly other me -while annoying and possibly gay- had somehow made my emotional state, whatever it was at the time, much better.

But this voice was…

How to describe it?

Oh to hell with being articulate.

It Was Fucking Creepy. I decided, closing my eyes and relaxing completely against Kakashi's warm torso.

**You'll come to love me with time.**

---------------------------------- ------------ -------------- --------------------------

I learned a very valuable lesson today.

Don't trust the nurses.

They waltz into your room all bubbly and fucking white just like the walls and the sheets. They put you on enough morphine to see shit crawling on your ceiling and smile and pretend it's all just shits and giggles and fucking Rainbow Bright.

They open your drapes so you can be blinded by the fucking sun like they expect their patient to be a vampire and are just bloodthirstily waiting for you to go up flames like they're auditioning on Buffy or something.

Then they hand you a cup that looks like grape juice. Probably the first not annoying thing you'd see in a hospital so you decide, 'sure, I'll drink it.' And trust me when I say that nine out of ten times, THERE'S NO FUCKING WAY IT'S GRAPE JUICE.

So suddenly steam is coming out of your ears and the dancing strawberries in your dinner bento are begging you not to eat them. So you don't cuz you just know that if you do you'll have nightmares. And then you're just fucking hungry.

God I hate hospitals.

They put me in the same room as the fucking Uchiha prick so all I really want to do is throw shit but he's sleeping and your nurse thinks he's adorable so she threatens you with a cheerful smile to put you in leather restraints. Fucking a.

But who knows? It could be the drugs talking.

They couldn't get an actual healer to look at me yet and I knew I'd been here for hours. Something about fucking priority. Fuck that. I don't know what held priority over me getting to beat on Sasuke but it had better be fucking important.

I don't know how I got here.

I don't know how long I'll be here.

Dogs can't come in cuz they're unsanitary and someone might be allergic. I'm willing to take that risk but when I told them that they just frowned and shook their heads. Assholes.

Apparently Naruto had been in to visit while I was asleep and if he decided to pop in again I was considering asking him to sneak Storm in in a fruit basket or something. He was good at shit like that so I had complete faith in him.

My door opened and I brightened up instantly.

'Summers Storm you'll be with mommy soon!'

**There's something wrong with you.**

'Fuck you, you creepy fuck stain.'

**You're intoxicated.**

'Don't be a fucktard Georgy! Look we have visitors!' I announced as Hinata stepped quietly into the room.

"Aweeee." I started loudly, hoping with all my being that my voice might disturb the precious Uchiha bastard from his beauty sleep. "You came to visit me Hina-chan! I feel so loved!"

Hinata's eyes went wide and I snickered, because it was funny. That's why people snicker isn't it? Well now it is.

**You're scaring her.**

'Nu-uh! Don't talk about matters that don't concern you fufu.'

**Fufu.**

'BUNNY FUFU!'

"H-how are you f-feeling, Yukari-chan?" Hinata spoke quietly and I grinned.

"Pssst. Hina… heeeey Hina, y-you know what we should do? We should break me outta here." Here eyes went wide again and I cackled uncharacteristically. "Hospitals are boooring!" I wined. "All I really wanna do is beat Sasuke with a pogo stick but they won't leeeet me."

Seven feet away Sasuke rolled right off his bed and I knew that if he wasn't awake before there was no way he wasn't now.

"Hey, Hey look!" I cackled again. "He fell out of bed!"

"A-are you f-feeling alright Yukari-chan?" Hinata squeaked.

"I am just dandy, thank you for asking Hina-chan." I smiled warmly at her. "Hey faggot!" I called to Sasuke. "Did you bruise your pretty face falling out of bed. Awe poor baby." I mocked jumping out of bed so quickly I stumbled and had to use his bed to steady myself. Sasuke was only just getting and I wondered if he was a groggy as I was.

I tackled him with a Cheshire cat smile.

And kissed his forehead.

I thought for a moment that he might faint. "There!" I said standing triumphantly. "I kiss it and make it all better."

'Now what am I forgetting…'

"Eh Hinata-chan do you even have pogo sticks in Konoha?" I asked. If they didn't I was going to fucking invent them. No child should have to grow up without a pogo stick it was like a fucking sin.

**You're loosing it.**

'Nu-uh, I lost it a while ago fucker you were just too far up your ass to notice.'

"W-what happened to you Yukari-chan!" Hinata asked urgently and I tilted my head faaar to the left so that I was seeing her stand like I normally did.

"Ne-Ne, Hina-chan. How are you doing that horizontal floating thingy. Is it a chakra exercise?!" I asked.

'I wanna learn!!!!!!!!!!!!'

"It's alright Hinata." A familiar cheerful voice announced stepping through my door. I recognized Kakashi instantly. "They put Yukari on a few drugs to reduce the pain but it's only temporary."

"Sensei!" I shouted and latched my arms and legs around his middle. He sweat dropped. "You came to visit me too! I had no idea! I feel so loved! Do they have pogo sticks in Konoha!?"

Kakashi shifted and walked me back to my bed were he attempted to dispose of me. But I wasn't that easy to get rid of!

"Nu-uh!" I said gleefully and keeping my arms tightly attached to him. "I am a Koala and I have chosen my resting place!!!!"

"W-what is a Koala, Kakashi-sensei." Hinata asked quietly.

I jumped off of Kakashi excitedly. "Koala's are little bear like animals that climb trees and eat bamboo and latch on to their mommy bells when they're young!" I explained giggling the whole way through.

"Well your new resting place is The Hyuga Compound Yukari-chan." Without my noticing kakashi had somehow made it all the way to the door. "Haishi has generously offered you a place to stay since you are Hinata's training partner."

I blinked stupidly for a moment. And then, "ROOMY!" I yelled jumping onto a terrified Hinata.

------------------------------- ------------------------------ --------------------------------------

Yukari under the influence was a scary albeit slightly hilarious thing.

Haishi, was going to have fun greeting his new resident.

_**------------------------------------------------ -----------------------------------------------------**_

_Once upon a time, in Isa Japan The Irenara's had been happy. They were a quiet little family, three children and content loving parents. _

_Once upon a time, in Isa Japan, the Hanram's had been happy. They were a quiet little family, one child, and the sweetest parents one could ever dream of._

_Once upon a time, in Toba Japan, The Saga's had been happy. They were a quiet little family, two children and caring parents_

_Once upon a happier time…  
__And then the clouds came…_

_For the Irenara's it was slow. They crumbled away in agony like stone beneath harsh waves. Alcoholic episodes gone arye, not knowing the difference between having nothing to live for and wanting to die, Family, blood, tearstearstears._

_For the Hanram's it was quick. They toppled down like a sad little house of cards. Fire raging, roaring, raising, screaming, building collapsing. Lost, alone, fearfearfear._

_For the Saga's it was subtle. The shift of dulling eyes as all the soul escaped. A touch missed here, a thought longed for there. Alienation, revulsion, denialdenialdenial _

_Once upon a tragedy  
__And then they found each other_

_Saga met Irenara first. The day he saved her, helped her escape. She breathed life back into him; being with her was like living again and in return he'd see her cry and gain her trust and watch her morph, become truly jaded._

_Irenara met Hanram next. The accident that revealed a savior, a little less pure, a little more dark, a protector she'd be indebted to forever._

_Hanram met Saga last. And the chaos that ensued was greater than Irenara knew, could ever have guessed. Neither willing to retreat and through similarities they found a compromise._

_Once upon an Illusion_

_The prince was never coming, and maybe sleeping beauty was dead_

_Sad little patchwork quilts_

_Whom found an impossible happiness, not quite real, but not fake either. Like an illusion of sweet honey that cloaked their sad little world._

_And they danced to sweet sweet misery  
While all around them their world was burning_

_Inseparable._

_Irenara, Hanram, and Saga_

_Yukari, Kanoke, and Tanner_

_And they left him behind…_

---------------------------------------------------- -----------------------------------------------------

**AN: **Finally finished. The hospital scene was my favorite since I juuuust wrote it. It was sooo much fun to write. I know this chapter was choppy and dramatic and still somehow boring but I hope the hospital scene makes up for it cuz this is the best version of chapter twelve there was and I am personally ready to move on thanks!

ALEX: I have no way to reach you. Did you know that? I'm not trying to be rude and I love your Tourettes Guy quotes but I can't respond cuz you don't review under an account. Anywho, you're reviews have really helped me get this done, cuz I felt bad. Every time a got a review and I was all like, 'Gahhh must update.' So for anyone else whose reading this. You owe Alex. Haha ^-^

Next Time On, F ck, I Think My TV's Broken: Settling in, avoiding Sasuke, terrifying fan girls, the Hyuga Compound, a couple healthy fillers, here come the Chunin Exams and then! Drum roll please. PANDA-CHAN! Next Time in **Chapter 13: Knife Called Lust.** Please review!


	15. Knife Called Lust

**AN: **Ladies in gentlemen I'm back!!!!!! So when did I last update anyway? It's been waaaaaay too long. You know, finals and holidays and stupid people and me being lazy. But my biggest excuse is that I've gotten in quite a bit of trouble this summer. It's a very unflattering tale involving a bonfire, late night adventures, illegal activities, magically blowing double 00, a fake name, cops, some theft, getting arrested, going to court, a little blood, and that thing I did to that guys face. However I have paid my dues and I'm now off house arrest and back in action!

Happy Birthday to:

Drowning In Fire: July 22 - Sorry I'm Late on the update :p

Emma and Tyler- the crack head twins- July 21

And everyone else whose birthday occurred I applaud you and give you cake.

Oh and me! My birthday happened too! : )

Disclaimer: I own star bucks, pffft hahahahahahaha :P

**Chapter 13**

**Knife Called Lust**

**(I'm not here to attack and make you kids panic, but it's just tragic the way these kids have it)**

She had said my name. That had been what I had wanted. Because when she said the name of things they were given power. I had pushed for it. Since I'd known her it had suddenly become vital to hear her reorganization of me in the form of my birth name.

And then she had done it. Not three hours ago in this very place. From that bed not 7 feet from mine. I cast a small glance at her peaceful form. She had done it so easily so voluntarily so naturally.

I had been so surprised I had rolled right out of my hospital bed and cracked my head so hard against the bed frame that I had seen stars. In a flood of morphine driven insanity she had been open, she had actually trusted me.

That meant I had won right?

She had finally said my name in my presence. It was elating.

And here I was… hung up over some little kiss.

**---------------------------------------------------- -----------------------------------------------------**

_It was cold, a chill in the air that frosted the breath in my lungs. I was gasping and a wail at the edge of my consciousness threatened to overspill._

_Wrong._

_Something itched in the back of my mind. I did not care that I couldn't see or remember how I had gotten here or that my body was going numb in the cold because there was something much more important here. Something I had forgotten… Though I knew with an absolute certainty, that something was wrong._

_Wrong wrong wrong_

_And then it was bright and I could not see through the spots in my vision, and I was confused and something was wrong. My breathing was rapid I could see it now and I was running because I had to… I had to…_

_Shura_

"_Brother…" The world left my lips in a gasp and I stumbled though the snow as the wave of emotions hit me. Fear, desperation, longing…_

"_I am going."_

_He left me._

"_You must stay here."_

_No I won't let you leave me behind_

"_You must stay and take care of your sister."_

_Why? It won't help. She'll die and I'll have to watch and know._

"_Please."_

_Stop it Shura, just stop it!_

_And I ran, the cold air biting violently at my young face, the face of 6 year old Yukari. Through stinging eyes I could see the dead forest that surrounded me on all sides. Birch trees with yawning leafless branches scratching like skeletons towards a grey sky. Thick snow on the forest floor, through which my feet staggered haphazardly on. _

_Where am I?_

_I tripped crashing down into the snow and coiling into a ball as pain racked my body. Tears sprung forth and I was sobbing, no… I was crying. Sorrow spread in my chest and I gripped myself with aching child's hands, willing away the phantom pain that was the loss of my brother. _

_Suddenly something sharp whizzed right past my head grazing my cheek and leaving a tiny trail of blood in its wake. _

_Real. _

_This pain was real. _

_My small hand touched my cheek and filled my vision and it was covered in blood. I gasped blinking away the tears suddenly wary. But I was alone here in what could have been a clearing on what could have been ice. _

_The weapon had landed pinned into the ground and I could see the sheen of my blood on its blade. Tentatively I reached for it. Aware now like I hadn't been then the danger of the action._

_The knife was odd, unlike any I'd ever seen. Diamond shaped and flat with an iron circle at its hilt. But it was sharp and its cut was clean. It had cut me, though it was thrown. A throwing knife. I drew my fingertips over it carefully trying to find a way that I may grip it. Trying to figure out how it worked. Transfixed._

_It felt wrong._

_I threw. It bounced harmlessly off of a tree._

_Wrong._

_My brow furrowed with impatience, my pride wounded at my own incompetence._

"_Wrong." I whispered. My left hand twitched and the hairs on the back of my neck stood on end. I walked back over to the weapon and crouched before it. My hand scratched irritably at my cheek… _

_Why was I here again?_

_What was I forgetting?_

"_You're holding it wrong." _

_My eyes flew wide at the voice whose approach I had not heard. Slipping my hand into my sleeve I drew out a dagger and let it fly over my shoulder._

"_Well, you certainly know how to use this. Perhaps all you need with the kunai is practice."_

_Weaponless I swiped the foreign blade from the snow before turning to face the stranger. He was cloaked in black but his face was the mask of a porcelain dog. He had caught what I had thrown with apparent ease and I felt my dislike of him grow as neither of us moved._

_Then my eyes focused and I saw what I had thrown was in fact 'Winters Front.' _

'_But why?'_

_My brow furrowed. _

_Why did I have Shura's favorite dagger?_

_And then my head started to hurt because thinking about Shura brought on a feeling of loss that I neither understood nor appreciated, _

"_Where is my brother?" I asked clearly, suddenly feeling that this question was important._

"_Perhaps if you told me who he was I might be able to tell you where he is." The man chirped at me._

"_Better question," I started. What had I been thinking? Surely Shura was at home, he was probably with Maya even as I was having this conversation. What I should have been asking is "Where am I?"_

"_You don't know?" He sounded amused and I felt my irritation spike._

"_Who are you?" I growled._

"_I'm afraid I can't tell you that." He said lowering Winters Frost and my eyes followed its path because the blade was just so important... I thought about asking if he could but he wouldn't and came to the conclusion that it didn't matter. This irritating man, he was giving me absolutely nothing to work with, no answers at all._

"_This weapon…" I said holding it up to clarify._

"_The kunai." He supplied for me and I nodded my thanks._

"_Could you show me… what I'm doing wrong?" I asked earnestly, my innocent curiosity rousing the stranger's interest._

_I tossed him the kunai, as I had heard him call it, but I had done it so clumsily that I could almost see him wince behind his mask. He paused for a moment and then sent it soaring past me again. The blade did not clip me this time but it did bury deep into the tree behind me. _

_I tried to remember how he had done it but it had been so fast…_

_I pulled the Kunai from the tree and adjusted my grip keeping my back to the stranger. A mischievous thought occurred to me and in the next moment I sent the blade hurling past the man who would not tell me his name. It buried into the tree behind his head. _

_Nothing was wrong, how silly I had been._

_My lips spread wide into a grin and I laughed. It was quiet at first and then it became something more. And I twirled in pleasure at my victory even as snow began to fall. I slipped and fell painfully on my butt, yet the pain was nothing to my glee. _

_Everything was fine._

"_I did it!" I announced perhaps even expecting praise from this man. _

_He said nothing._

"_I'm Yukari, Irenara Yukari." I announced grinning broadly. "Thank you, Scarecrow!"_

_**Everything will fall apart.**_

I blinked my eyes open but found that everything was dark and quiet. The only sound I could strain my ears to hear was Sasuke's breathing from the bed beside mine which I might add was just a little bit creepy. I was in the hospital, I decided. Someone must have come and gotten me after I'd passed out… again.

How many times was that now? I should have been more ashamed of my increasing habit of blacking out but found that I could not make myself feel at blame. After all, all of my problems lead back to my father, whom I was all too eager to hate.

**Hello Yukari, sleep well?**

'Ugh, still here are you?' I frowned.

**That hurts my love, and after I was so worried about you too.**

'What the hell are you on about?'

**Well, I'm glad to see you're no longer intoxicated at least.**

I raised an eyebrow. 'Kimi you're annoying.'

I shifted to sit up and found it easy, perfectly pain free. It was bizarre. Relieved at my state of painlessness I forced myself to a stand. It was… a bit like I was floating actually. I liked it.

I scratched my cheek in irritation as I tried to remember what I had been dreaming. It felt important.

"Yukari…"

I took a moment to evaluate my sanity. Surely Uchiha Sasuke had not just said my name. Maybe they'd pumped me full of drugs and I was hearing shit. I stared at him for a long moment and let myself really look at him for the first time. I had spent a lot of time looking at the ice cube as what he would become but our last conversation had made me realize something. He wasn't that person yet. That look on his face when he'd confronted me, he shouldn't have had that look yet.

**What will you do when he begins the change?**

I grimaced trying to ignore my new voice. This one easily male, and far far more irritating.

The change in Sasuke had been huge and apparent and I had been a fucking idiot to think that everyone trusted me just because I was a ninja of Konoha. He was just a boy and he'd been through more then I and I had been a fool to forget that.

He was the last of a very prestigious clan and he had inherited the looks of his mother, granting him a soft face. I guess he was cute, I mean we were 12 so there really couldn't be another word for it. Biasness aside… Sasuke was cute and talented and really really arrogant. But he wasn't evil and he wasn't stupid.

**Not yet at least.**

"Itachi…" He grunted, and I noticed he was sweating now. I thought for a moment that I should wake him up. In fact the full scale of which that idea tempted me was surprising. But then again I'd had my fair share of nightmares and I'd really hate it if anyone had seen me like that. So I decided that no, I would leave the Uchiha to his horrors, he disliked me as much as I could afford for now. Saving him would be difficult with this level of distrust.

My hand scratched at my cheek in irritation. "What am I gonna do with you Uchiha? You make my life so frustrating."

His face took on a pained expression.

I stuck my tongue out at him and tried to feel happy.

He grunted again.

I turned around and tried not to care.

It didn't work…

**------------------------------------------------------ ------------------------------------------------------**

Really he didn't know why he was here.

Well, that wasn't necessarily true.

He had come to visit her. That was a solid reason.

The why for the why was a little foggy.

It made very little sense since he already knew she would recover and she wasn't even his teammate. Still she had become a startling knew observation for him. She was one of the most logical people her age he'd ever met but she played favorites and it threw everything off. She could have been such a tactical genius but she was too busy focusing on the one instead of the all. It was frustrating. Someone with such potential was going to loose the war.

"_Why the fuck would I want to fight in a war? Listen carefully Pineapple Head I'ma teach you something important. "Yukari leaned forward, fine hair falling over her shoulders and a keen glint in her red eyes. "When shit starts going down, take what's important to you," she held up her knight, "And get it the hell out of there. Then you can do whatever you want." _

It was a mark of her brilliance that when she decided a piece was going to live, that it would, no matter how he tried. He wondered if he'd be able to win if she'd ever chosen the king as a favorite. She never had though…

Troublesome woman.

Ino had been giving him a ridiculously hard time since he'd started spending time with Yukari. Singing some song that wasn't worth his time to learn and yet he would probably remember it for the rest of his days because his mind just worked like that. It was such a drag sometimes…

But that wasn't why he was here either, he was certain of it. He knew platonic feelings when he saw them, felt them. In fact he had been briefly infatuated with Yamanaka Ino for a short period of time but that was nothing like this.

Things between him and Irenara Yukari were not romantically based, they never had been. Mostly he had started watching her because she had showed up seemingly from no where, with absolutely no background, and no one else seemed to question it. She had asked him for they're first game. Go. As he predicted she would that day in the field. He had been counting on it. He had not been counting on how fond he'd become of her once he'd deemed her not a threat. He had even sought her out for a game or two.

It was odd.

Was it possible… could he doing this on a whim?

Nonsense, he never did anything on a whim. It was either worth his time or it wasn't. If it wasn't he much rather be in a field somewhere sleeping. The real kicker was she wasn't even going to be awake! What was he going to do? Watch her sleep?

He sighed; it was troublesome and if he could have stopped thinking about it, been distracted in some way then that would have been simply fantastic. However he was a genius and his mind was not easily distracted.

What a drag…

"Are you Shikamaru?"

His eyes widened fractionally and the close proximity of the girl who had spoken nearly threw him off balance.

She grinned at him showing pearly teeth. Her absurdly pink eyes glittering in happiness.

"Yuka isn't awake yet!" She claimed, still only three inches from his face. "I'm bored! Can I touch your hair?"

He raised a skeptical brow at this foreign girl, one whom he was certain he'd never seen before. The clothes she wore were not made for her and her height suggested an age that her eyes did not possess.

He blinked rapidly as she pulled her fingers through his pony tail. "Ooooh! It's soft! How does that work!? I thought for sure all that jell would have stiffened it out! Or do you use a jutsu to get it to look like that? Yuka once told me about a girl who used a jutsu to make her blond hair all bouncy and curly and I'm pretty sure that's how Kai get's his to look that freak'en amazing."

She was talking about hair jutsu and he sighed because responding to this girl's mental ravings seemed like such a drag.

"Troublesome." He mumbled.

"Oh… well. I'm sorry I didn't mean to be a bother." her eyes shifted away from his and she stepped back looking alarmingly hurt. "I've just been so bored…. I-I'm sorry." And to his absolute horror she bowed to him. He had single handedly smashed her happy demeanor and that in its self was irritating.

"Ah, it's fine. I wasn't talking about you." He sighed.

Something shifted, a shadow passed over fuscia eyes and he became weary even as the smile returned to her face. From her he had seen honest hurt and honest happiness but this shadow had been neither. He felt his genius perking up as it always did when there was some new puzzle that needed piecing together and he felt his irritation raise as it always did when his genius perked up because this meant work and he'd rather be sleeping.

"I'm Hanram Kanoke, Yuka speaks highly of you Pineapple Head." She gave him a winning grin and he found the corners of his mouth tilting ever so slightly upwards.

He had forgotten about the odd situation with Irenara Yukari.

_He _had forgotten.

"Nara Shikamaru." He nodded.

'Hanram Kanoke…' he thought with an appreciative smile, 'distract me.'

**----------------------------------------------------- -----------------------------------------------------**

You ever wake up after dreaming about vampires and dinosaurs and just feel fan-fucking-tastic? Only not in the sarcastic sense? Like in the, 'wow I just slept for a ridiculous amount of time,' kind of way?

It must be like how Yoshi feels when he first wakes up on his stump.

Just before that jackass Mario puts him to work or sends him off on an epic adventure that he so did not ask to go on.

Poor Yoshi…

I always wanted to be a little green dinosaur myself. And venture around eating fruits till someone pissed me off. Then I could eat them!

Was that… cannibalistic?

I don't think so… I mean I wouldn't be a human anymore, I'd be a dinosaur. Eating people and fruit would just make me an omnivore. This was fine with me. I'd be all like, 'Mmmm people! Tastes like steak!'

Or something to that effect anyway.

"And I want my own singing tree." I announced.

"What?" And I noticed Sasuke was in the room with me for the first time. But I couldn't dislike him right now, I was Yoshi and I'd just gotten a full night sleep on my tree stump.

"A singing tree! Like on Yoshi Island." I clarified jumping up and sitting Indian style on my bed. Wishing even as I explained that I could float like Xelloss cuz that would be fucking awesome. "And I could sleep on my stump after a meal of steak people and the tree would sing me a lullaby!"

"What the hell are you talking about?"

And I think, maybe, I enjoyed the way his eyes got all big, just a little too much.

"Oh gosh oh golly gee!" I gasped about to go on a tirade about the incompetence of Konoha for not teaching it's students about the amusingness that was Yoshi. Then I stopped because I noticed that the large oxygen intake had made me see bright colors.

So I did it again!

AND I SAW PINK!

So I sat there on my bed breathing like a pregnant woman because now I was seeing bubbles and I had forgotten all about Sasuke till he was suddenly beside me, shaking me. My head lolled about for a moment and since I was in the middle of a breath all the bubbles around me popped and the happy music went away.

"What the fuck, Sasuke!?" I whined. Abruptly all movement halted, but the bubbles weren't coming back so I was mad.

"Damn it! You made all the pretty bubbles go away!" I complained grabbing one of his cheeks and pulling to show my annoyance. He didn't move, he probably wasn't even breathing. Good, he'd made my happy bubbles disappear, 'I hope his face turns blue and gets stuck like that.'

"Oh!" I let go and his cheek snapped back into place and he was still too stunned to move and I too occupied to care. I could practically see the light bulb appear above my head. It was also pretty. "Since you're an Emo kid I'll bet you didn't like the bubbles I was making and you wanted them to go away!" I concluded.

"Really if you didn't want them there you should have just told me instead of shaking me like a lunatic" I chided tapping his nose with my finger.

"I could have eaten you!" I yelled putting my hands on his shoulders and shaking him much like he'd shaken me. "And then where would you be? Stuck in an egg that's where!"

Then I noticed he wasn't moving…

"Gah! Nurse! HELP! HE'S DYING!" I shouted trying to stand on the bed but falling off of it instead and in a desperate attempt to stay on I grabbed Sasuke's hair and brought him down with me.

Now he was on top of me and I was screaming, convinced that I had killed him.

Then his hand clamped over my mouth… hard.

"Shut Up." He said through gritted teeth.

And I was so happy I flipped our positions so I was on top of him, hugging him like he was my koala mother and I his child.

"You're alive!" I announced pressing my body to him and rubbing my cheek against his with a Cheshire cat smile.

"Yuka what on earth are you doing to Sasuke?"

I blinked, turning my face to Kanoke who now stood by the door next to my dear Pineapple head.

And I grinned.

"I'm cleaning him!" I claimed loudly. "He is my Koala baby and it's bath time!" and I licked his cheek.

"Get off of me!!" Sasuke practically shouted, throwing me away from him.

So, feeling as wounded as a mother whose child was rejecting her I put my head in my arms and sobbed.

"T-they grow up so fast!" I wailed. And BAM!

I saw stars for a moment as Kanoke had taken it upon herself to smack me upside the head.

"Kano, that hurted me!" I whined.

"Yuka, you haven't cried in years and you know it. Now get off of the ground, the doctors say that since there's nothing more they can do for you and Shika here is a certified ninja I can escort you to the Hyuga Compound!" she said far far too brightly. "So quit traumatizing Sasuke and get up."

She stretched her hand out to me and I took it to help me stand.

"I'm glad you're okay Yuka." She said, and it was the first gentle thing she'd done all morning. It made me grin like an idiot. "Even if you are pumped full of enough drugs to kill a small horse."

I twitched.

--------------------- -------------------------------- ------------------------ ----------------------------

By the time we got to the Hyuga Compound my head was killing me. I'd sobered enough to realize that I'd done some really weird shit back there and I tried to feel sorry for the Uchiha but I just ended up laughing.

Was that mean? I think so but it was still funny as hell.

I decided I was going to pretend it had never happened. In fact I might just feign amnesia to get out of the bizarre questions. Cuz let's face, I really didn't want to explain Yoshi while sober, or whatever.

I however, really didn't remember when they told me that I was moving into the Hyuga Compound. Which I found rather alarming because I didn't like having gaps in my memory, not one bit. Apparently I'd latched onto Kakashi, which wasn't too surprising, and I'd also jumped poor Hinata-chan, which I did on a regular basis anyway.

"So nothing too bad, ne Hina-chan?" I asked, readjusting the ice on my forehead, present due to the massive headache I'd received.

"N-No, nothing too horrible at all, Yukari-chan."

I smiled at her and shifted. Pain shot through my stomach which, those incompetent medics apparently had not bothered to heal. I popped a pair of pills that would dull the pain and shifted positions again.

I did not like the Hyuga mats. They weren't comfortable, simple as that. It was just enough of a bedroll to look nice and still not enough to feel comfortable. Sleeping was going to be… a bit like hell. I wondered briefly if I might decorate my room. Asking in and of itself would probably be an insult so I'll just have to start putting shit up and see what happens.

It was also a good thing that I had virtually no shame because I was pretty certain the Hyuga eyes had a stage that could see through clothing. Most people would be totally unnerved by this, but I just found it fucking hilarious. I asked Hinata but she fainted so I decided not to pursue the subject with her. However, to prove my theory I contemplated writing 'Neji' on my ass.

It was just lude enough to get a reaction. And the voice in my head disapproved completely which only made me want to do it more. REBEL!

But I hadn't met Neji. It was like he was avoiding the Compound. Which, now that I thought about it, may not have been far from the truth? But for the Hyuga protégé people sure didn't talk about him much. I wouldn't even know he existed if I hadn't watched the anime. What was I expecting, for Neji to be out in the yard practicing badass techniques? Or maybe I'd thought he'd come and taunt Hinata or something? Something? I mean fuck.

"Hinata-sama." I heard someone say politely, the voice was young. I looked over to find a male bent over in a fine bow, a small pleasant smile on his face. His hair was maybe an inch below his chin and fell in gorgeous strands of dark brown. He straightened and I could see the branch symbol branded into his forehead, above his byakugan eyes.

"Hyuga." I breathed and I frowned because my damn ice pack had slipped again.

"Akira-kun" Hinata replied gently. "Y-You know such f-formalities a-are unnecessary."

"My apologies Hinata-sama, I'm afraid I must insist."

She gave him a polite smile that said this wasn't something new and Akira entered the room.

And bowed to me.

I blinked once.

Then twice.

"Good afternoon, Irenara-sama."

"Dude seriously? Please don't bow to me." I said feeling just a little creeped out. He smiled up at me and straightened himself.

"I'm afraid as honored guest of the Hyuga Main Family I would be punished for treating you any other way. Though Hinata-sama has similarly given my permission to treat her in an informal fashion while we're alone I do not wish to fall into a habit. You understand, Irenara-sama." He smiled quietly like a mother indulging a child with an obvious answer.

I twitched.

"Well that's just peachy." I sighed. "Are all of you so damn polite? I dunno how I feel about that kiddo. I can be all formal for awhile but eventually that'll fall apart."

"I am sure you will find a way to survive the Compound. Hinata-sama tells me you are rather resourceful."

My eyes widened, Hinata had complimented me? Had I forgotten so easily that they had taken me in? Was I really that ungrateful? Here I was, bitching about pointless shit. "Yes, I'll just have to deal with it won't I?" And I smiled genuinely at the boy who had been so polite and his eyes widened a faction and his face dusted a shade of pink. That was a curious reaction…

**Oh hell…**

'What's got your knickers in a twist?'

**Talking to me now are you? **The voice sounded amused.

'Yeah well, the silent treatment to a voice in your head is difficult work and I'm just too lazy for that.' I admitted.

**Is that so? My lazy Yukari.**

'Cuz that doesn't sound oober possessive or anything.' I input my grin widening.

This was rather new to me. No one had ever said 'My Yukari' to me about anything. With a human it probably would have bothered me, but I didn't see the harm in letting the voice in my head say it. Since he was apart of me it didn't interfere with my independence whatsoever. So while it was pretty weird if you focused on it too hard, there was still something oddly flattering about it.

"Irenara-sama?" Akira was saying, and I had to wonder how many times he'd already called my name because that did not sound like the tone of a first time attention grabber. "Irenara-sama?"

"Eh haha. Sorry, spaced out for a minute there." I responded and Akira smiled.

"That's alright, where would you like me to put these?" And for the first time I stared at the folded items in this boy's hands. They were so plain I could have taken them for sheets, and I think subconsciously I had. But no, they were black kakis and a white shirt, plain and nondescript.

I raised a brow. Akira caught on.

"Hiashi-sama lends these to you in place of the clothing you've lost in the destruction of your clan and the ones you wear now which are covered in blood and in need of immediate repair. He has ordered for a tailor to visit the compound and fit you properly for a new wardrobe." he said with a smile. As though it were the most natural thing in the world and I should have guessed that it would occur.

**Perhaps that is a normal thing within a clan. Just how clearly where you thinking when you told them you where the heiress to a clan? **

"With what money?" I found myself asking before I could shut my damn mouth.

**My, that was rather tactless of you.**

'I don't have that kind of money!' I thought in horror.

"With your clan inheritance of course." He looked guilty for a moment. "Hiashi-sama spoke with the Hokage and he took the liberty of dipping into your funds. I sincerely hope you do not mind. The Hokage said you wouldn't, and really, you do need clothes."

'Funds?'

**Ah it seems the old man wishes to assist you. You should be very thankful my Yukari.**

'I… I guess…'

**------------------------ ------------------------- ---------------------- ------------------------**

"Wow Yuka, you really suck at this game."

I frowned at Kanoke's blunt observation.

"I do not 'suck at this game,' as you so delicately put it. Pineapple Head over there just happens to be a genius." I countered from the matt on the floor.

They had come to visit me every day since I'd gotten out of the hospital, for which I was eternally thankful. I was starting to think Shikamaru was spending all his spare time with Kanoke and me. Hinata couldn't be around as often since she trained herself into the ground on a daily basis. Naruto similarly made an effort to drop in almost every day. Sakura had visited twice Kakashi had come three times…

I hadn't seen hide nor hair of Uchiha Sasuke.

I had to wonder what Shikamaru thought of us. If Sasuke had noticed something was off, I was almost certain Pineapple Head had as well. He wasn't asking any questions, that wasn't the kind of guy he was anyway, which was good because I did not fancy trying to lie to Shikamaru.

I considered telling him, you know. It would be good to have him on our side, maybe he could figure out how we got here, or why I wasn't healing, or what had happened to Kanoke. Really my head hurt just thinking about it.

But whenever telling him was just on the tip of my tongue the voice in my head would say, '**Don't,' **and I wouldn't.

"Sure sure, excuses excuses. I've been around him for days now and he doesn't seem like a genius to me." She accused with sparkling eyes.

I hadn't told her my thoughts on the matter and it seemed she was going to leave this whole mess up to me. Which while irritating was probably for the best… I think. At the very least it would make it a lot easier to protect her.

I sighed. This was getting way out of hand.

"Actually… You're not that bad." Shikamaru said even as his queen took my rook.

I glowed at Shikamaru's compliment sticking my tongue out at Kanoke in a very childish manner.

"But Kanoke is better."

I gaped like a fish for a grand total of three seconds before speech returned. "What the hell do you mean, 'She's better than me!?'"

Kanoke grinned childishly down at me from her spot behind Shikamaru and he didn't even respond when she happily ran her fingers through his hair.

Kanoke was surprisingly touchy feely when she got attached. And she had gotten very very attached to the lazy genius. I didn't feel the need to stop her, I knew we could trust Shikamaru, even if couldn't bring myself to tell him the truth, even if he couldn't trust us.

"She's a lot like you were when we first played, in that I did not understand why you were moving the pieces you were moving. After playing you for while I realized there's method to the madness. But Kanoke…" He paused carefully his eyes shifting over the board. "Kanoke is so bad that it's quite impossible to tell what she'll do next because there's no method, no pattern at all."

No on spoke.

I started laughing.

**-------------------- ------------- ----------------- --------------------**

"What the bloody fuck do you think you're doing!?" I screeched as he tugged my shirt off.

"Don't be silly this is the best way I can get your measurements Miss Irenara." He said too coyly. "Such a dirty mouth." He tisked trying and unfortunately succeeding in getting my shirt off.

"AH! STOP IT!" I shouted not caring that the whole compound could hear me. I struggled away from him pulling my shirt against my chest to cover the embarrassing pink bra I was wearing.

"Well that's just darling!" He stated with a grin. He was an absolute lunatic a real creeper. And to think when he'd walked in I'd thought he was pretty cute. You know, an older man, sexy right. He was 16, too old to be innocently stripping a young, innocent, pure, and beautiful girl like myself.

I'm so full of it haha.

"Come now my dear." He said with a smile that was neither comforting nor gentle. And suddenly I didn't have the shirt for protection anymore. It had just disappeared and that was just not fair.

I felt like I could cry.

And knew that I wouldn't.

Mircea was a good looking boy with a slim figure and a Romanian name that didn't fit with this time or place. But he'd assured me that he'd been an apprenticed tailor all his life and I didn't see a lie in those green eyes. He had long black hair tied back in a pony tail which really could have been Romanian actually.

And I was pretty sure he was gay.

I hoped to god he was gay.

"What the hell!?" I screamed.

"Well we can't take off your shirt and not your pants." he said simply.

"Fuck no!"

"Come now… ahah there!"

"What the fuck! Pervert!"

"Such language is unbecoming of a lady Miss Irenara."

"I'm not a lady ass hole I'm a ninja!"

"Hm, you have nice hips."

"Don't touch me there!"

"Good build too."

"AH!"

"You'll be beautiful when you've matured more."

"STOP TOUCHING ME!"

…

"That's quite a scar Miss Irenara." He said, in a sober tone that I had not heard from him since his arrival. His lithe fingertip traced the grotesque wound on my stomach.

"My fathers parting gift." I admitted.

And I closed myself to him.

**I… don't… like him.**

-------------------------- --------------- ----------------- ---------------------

"Ah! Yukari-sama! I really don't think you should be leaving yet!" Akira shrieked.

Yes he did that on occasion. While I'd happily progressed past a last name basis I couldn't seem to make him kill the honor title. I'd also taken to calling him Kiddo on a regular basis cuz I knew it irritated him. Apparently he was 11. He didn't really look 11, he looked younger, I couldn't pin an age for sure but he looked like beautiful boy who would one day be a sexy son of a bitch. But I wasn't about to look bad so I called him it before and after this little revelation.

"Nonsense! It'll be fine!" I said throwing the sheets off.

Akira choked, his eyes fixed on my bare legs. I raised an eyebrow and almost laughed. I didn't usually wear shorts because, let's face it, I'm a pale motherfucker. So perhaps my black shorts surprised him. I scooted on the bed and the shorts crept higher. Akira's eyes widened and I smiled, this could be a good thing.

It was hard to be body conscious after being poked and prodded and violated so thoroughly by the Mircea. Although I was pretty sure he was gay because I had never met a straight man who was that flamboyant.

"Akira-kun." I said sweetly and I got that delightful blush again. "Could you please look away for a moment?" I pushed my top up a few inches and he instantly twirled to bury his face in my wall.

And I left.

It was quite simple really. I felt loads better and I needed out of this stark boring compound. I was not in pain, I mean yeah, my stomach itched like a little bitch, but no shooting agony. And best of all, not once in the past three weeks had I gone into flaming lockdown.

The only thing that bothered me was that my shorts didn't have pockets. And if I could bitch about something like pockets, I think it's safe to say, I could go out and about for a little while.

Although my friends tried very hard to visit me as often as possible I was certain that I'd get no visitors for today. This happened sometimes and I always found it unbearably boring. I had even seen Pinky and Scarecrow yesterday, awkward though it may have been, I was still… touched… I guess.

I hadn't seen hide nor hair of Uchiha Sasuke.

And it was getting irritating.

Three weeks, it had been tree weeks.

Once, that's fine. Twice that okay. Three times, well the song says he's playing with himself and that's gotta stop.

**You miss him.**

'See that's what I thought it was too.' I admitted.

**My Yukari, why would you miss someone like him? He's cornered you and questioned you and let you fall to the poison in the fire. You'd been planning on avoiding him.**

'Tch I didn't even get the chance to avoid him! I was gonna fake sleep and everything and then bam, the fucking twerp goes missing!? That just ain't right.'

**Will you go looking for him?**

'Fuck that, I'm just out to be out of the compound. Maybe I'll get a tan. I can't remember the last time I wore this little clothing out in public.' Which was not a lie. White tank top and black shorts while boring was less then I'd worn out in a very very long time. And hell it had been a while since I'd gotten a nice tan. I had this bad tendency to burn… a lot.

**I think you look beautiful.**

'Quite being weird.' I ordered. Then I noticed something. Or rather I noticed someone.

And I grinned.

**Speak of the devil and he shall appear.**

**------------------- ---------prov change----------- ---------------------**

I was avoiding Irenara Yukari.

I did not make a habit of avoiding people, and really those Hyuga's had been making it ridiculously easy by keeping her locked up. But it was true.

I had tried to deny it for a time. She was at the Hyuga compound, I did not like the Hyuga's and therefore did not care to be in their compound. It's a surprisingly rational argument and I'd almost fooled myself with it. It was only during the second week when I was about a foot away from her door that I realized why I did not want to be here.

She was creepy and was always doing strange things when I was around. She brought up uncomfortable questions that I was all too happy to bury. I could not say the team was boring without her. But something was definitely different.

Naruto was not boring he was just an idiot. Sakura was not boring or an idiot she was just a raging fan girl. And Kakashi, while neither boring, an idiot, nor a fan girl, he was just irritating. But then, did throwing Yukari into the mix really help? She was never boring, an idiot, or a fan girl, and she was only irritating some of the time… but she was absolutely insane.

Cool hands slipped over my eyes and my world became dark.

"Guess who." A familiar voice breathed in my ear and I tensed in disbelief. I turned to face her and my eyes met Yukari's laughing face and the crimson eyes of the brother that I hated. I always seemed to forget… just how strongly her eyes effected me, and it had only grown worse over that time I had not seen them.

"Did ya miss me?!" She asked grinning.

My father used to say something, what was it… Speak of the devil and he shall appear.

She in this case. I mused.

I surveyed her for a moment taking in the astonishing amount of skin she was showing and the headband tied around her arm that marked her ninja.

…

She wasn't wearing shoes.

"Wow I'm glad to see you too Popsicle. This is such a tearful reunion." She stated dryly but I felt no guilt.

"Where are your shoes?" And it was official. I was an idiot. What on earth had possessed me to say… why the hell would I… I was the Uchiha Heir damn it! 'Where are your shoes?' What the hell was wrong with me?

My face didn't change.

"Oh haha I had to ditch that Hyuga boy pretty quickly and that involved me not changing or grabbing shoes." She puffed up with pride. "Really it was quite an amazing escape." She insisted.

My face did not change.

Her cheeks puffed out in irritation. It was oddly endearing.

And she threw herself on me in a dead hug.

"Chibi Sasu-chan has his pride so I'll go first!" She chipped, I couldn't move. "Uchiha I missed you and next time I'm on bed rest you'd better visit me till I'm sick of it and bake me a shit load of cookies cuz I'm not admitting that again." She said with no apparent shame.

I still couldn't move.

But my face did change.

Great.

She detached herself from me and I was cold. "Well?" She said expectantly.

"Hn." I grunted and for some reason unbeknownst to me, this seemed to please her.

"Headed from a mission!?" She asked excitedly and I took a moment to really look at her. She looked more like it had only been a week since the trip to the Waves not three weeks… but she seemed to be alright. Paler then usual though. I let my eye lids lower into a bored expression.

"Yeah." And I began walking again.

She nodded. "I figured since it's midday you'd probably already done one or two and gone out for lunch. What were you guys doing?"

I blinked slowly but did not lessen my pace. She had taken the time to explain herself. I could take the time to answer I suppose.

"We were working on the river, another D-class." I admitted. "Naruto almost got himself killed." I recalled how only minutes ago I had scolded him and Sakura for their weakness. And I scoffed. "I had to save the idiot yet again." Her face lit up in absolute delight and I decided maybe full answers weren't such a bad thing.

And then we heard the screaming.

I twirled around and changed direction and surprisingly enough Yukari followed me. She looked… too excited to the situation. I decided to push it off, figuring that I'd be excited for anything if it got me out of the captivity she had been facing with the Hyuga's. And for the first time I actually felt a pang of guilt for not visiting her.

The scene was not pleasant when we got there. There was a boy, the Hokage's grandson held up by his neck by a foreign ninja. I narrowed my eyes and realized… Yukari was gone. She had just… disappeared.

**--------------------------------------------prov change -------------------------------------------------**

I was in the tree before Sasuke even thought of it. Higher than him though. Kankuro was cuter then I had thought in the anime and Temari more beautiful. The sand siblings. I was so happy I could die. These people… They kicked so much ass.

**Are you… fangirling?**

'Why yes… yes I am.' I admitted with no shame.

"You better take you hands off him right now!" Naruto shouted, he didn't look very threatening though. I sighed. His eyes looked funny, it's one thing to see it in anime but the way they lost their irises like that in real life was just fucking odd.

"We got a few minutes before he get's here, let's mess with these punks huh?" Kankuro said with a grin. He looked a bit… bat like… but that didn't make any sense did it? His costume should have spoken cat to me cuz his hood practically gave him kitty ears. Hm… nope still getting bat off this guy. Weird.

"Let go of me you jerk!" Konohamaru demanded, perhaps thinking that the ninja would recognize him and drop him immediately.

"You're fisty." Kankuro responded with a fond sort of sadism. "But not for long."

"Put him down!" Naruto growled out and like he always does, he charged… right at a foreign ninja ,whose skills he couldn't possibly know… wow. I don't think I ever realized while watching the anime just how often Naruto almost get's himself killed. Just thinking about it made me uncomfortable.

Halfway through Naruto's charge, Kankuro's eyes opened in what was actually a pretty scary expression and, with a hand movement so subtle my team may have missed it, he tripped my Uzumaki. I twitched in irritation.

"You're a leaf genin too? Looks like your village is full of a bunch of wimps." He taunted and I scoffed. What a weak attempt to rile someone up.

"That's it!" Naruto screamed. "Drop him now or I'll take you apart! You got that fool!?

And now Sakura was strangling him and telling him the threats weren't gonna solve anything. Which was just really embarrassing for me and my team all together.

"You're annoying." I'd heard that from Sasuke before. "All of you. I don't like runts or any other scrawny weaklings. So when a wimp like this starts shooting off his mouth, I just wanna break him in half." Kankuro said and my team took him seriously. But I guess we had a right to be skiddish after Zabuza and all.

Then it all happened very quickly. The moment after Temari denied having any involvement with this, Kankuro drew back his fist and Naruto charged. Sasuke's rock smacked into Kankuros' hand and Konohamaru fell to the ground. And then it was over and everything was moving at a normal speed again.

Sheesh.

There he was. Badass Uchiha Sasuke tossing a rock up and down like he was the shit and he knew it. He was only a few branches below me.

"You're a long way from home and you're way out of your league." Sasuke stated all cool and shit. "Get lost." He said simply and crushed the rock for emphasis. It slipped from his hand, now nothing more then crushed dust. And okay, I'll admit it. Maybe he did look kinda badass… just a little.

And I decided that that was just too much Sasuke coolness and that that simply had to stop.

I dropped down and landed next to Sasuke pulling on his cheek in a happy way that felt oddly familiar. And yup, that killed it, all the cool air just went whooshing away.

"Look at you Popsicle, you're so badass." I said cheekily keeping my eyes shut.

"Yukari what the hell!?" Sasuke growled through gritted teeth.

"Angel-chan!" Naruto shouted sounding so happy that it warmed me.

"Yukari?" Sakura just sounded confused.

"Think they're real?" I asked.

"What?" Sasuke didn't understand which seemed fair considering I hadn't explained.

I smirked pumping chakra into my heals so I'd land right next to Kankuro. He had a split second to be shocked… and then I licked his face.

"W-What the!?" Yeah that was pretty much the general reaction all around. To be honest it tasted salty, like when you lick the palm of your hand. But where his face make-up was it tastes it bit like… have you ever tasted paint remover?

"Shit these aren't real tatoos it's face paint." I decided licking my lips. No one moved.

Kankuro tried to grab for me but I danced out of his reach and was behind him now. I inhaled deeply.

"You smell of the desert and I taste intelligence on your skin." I said cryptically. "But someone so intelligent who has been welcomed into our village surely would not try to beat on the Hokages only grandson." I twirled and smiled at him wishing I was in my more ninja-ish attire.

"Silly make-up man." I giggled. "I would expect better of a sand sibling." And I Xelloss smiled just for them. I could feel Sasuke grimace. He knew that smile, oh he knew it well.

"Another wimp, you guys are everywhere!" Kankuro insulted.

"You are…" I opened my eyes so the crimson shown at him and I played with the idea of saying 'weak.' But then decided that that would probably be bad for Sasuke. So I slipped the Xelloss mask back on and said. "Not my type!"

And I laughed.

Kankuro tried to grab me again but...

"Kankuro… Back off." Panda-chan was here. And that my friends, is what a badass looks like. Gaara of the sand, 'mmm break me off a piece of that,' and there he was upside down in the tree and Sasuke hadn't even noticed him. Awesome. He was my sexy red head with teal eyes framed with orbital edema that made him look like a panda bear. Arms crossed, upside down, cool expression…

'Back seat windows up, that's the way we like to-'

**Aren't you a bit young to be saying things like that?**

"You're an embarrassment to our village." Gaara stated bluntly and it was a mark of his power that Kankuro halted immediately.

"Uh… hey Gaara." He said nervously.

"Have you forgotten the reason we came all the way here?" Gaara asked.

"Uh no, I mean, they challenged us. They started the whole thing really." He tried, looking suddenly very pathetic. I was the only one who seemed to find it funny though.

"Shut up." Gaara's eyes narrowed. "Or I'll kill you."

And now even I felt the chill of horror in the air.

"I'm sorry for any trouble he caused." Gaara told Sauske. And I twitched.

Gaara dissolved in a burst of glittering sand and reappeared almost instantly in front of his brother and sister. "Let's go." He demanded in a low tone. "We didn't come here to play games."

They were leaving when I put my arm out and clothes-lined Sakura in the middle of her sentence. She was going to ask why they were here; I wasn't going to let her embarrass my team. It was understandable that she didn't know because Kakashi hadn't told us, but I knew, and that was enough.

"You are from the Sand Village." I said simply and they turned to me eyeing me wearily. I appreciated the attention.

"Obviously." Temari stated tapping her headband.

I narrowed my gaze in a sick loving way. "You're headbands state it, yes. But your taste confirms it."

**There you go again, confusing people.**

"Genin I assume ripe pickings for the Chunin Exam." I grinned. This seemed to surprise Temari and Kankuro but Gaara didn't even react. That disappointed me. I wanted him… to notice me…

"The Chunin Exams? What's that?" Naruto asked.

"Well I've never heard of any Chunin Exams. Believe it." Naruto admitted and I closed my eyes and took a deep breath.

"Well I believe it alright." Temari stated with a smirk. "That you're totally clueless."

"Hey boss." Konohamaru piped in. "Those are the exams that every genin has got to take in order to graduate into being a full on Chunin."

"Oh! Well why didn't you say so!? I am so there." Naruto stated enthusiastically.

Gaara turned to leave, finding my team lacking. I almost bowed my head in shame as they began to walk away.

Then Sasuke landed next to me.

"Hey you! Identify yourself." He demanded. Temari turned with a pleased smile.

"You mean me?" She asked far less embarrassing then a fan girl.

"No… him." And Sasuke even pointed. "The guy with the gourd on his back." I smacked Sasuke's hand.

"Don't point, it's rude." He ignored me. Gaara turned.

"My name is Gaara, of the desert." He said finally. "I'm curious about you too. Who are you?"

And I thought it was awful nice of Gaara to be learning the names of the people he intended to kill, if not just a little morbid…

"I am Uchiha Sasuke." The Popsicle stated at last. And a very very cold wind blew past us all. Which was very dramatic in my opinion. I started to walk in the opposite direction of the sand siblings so I could go fan girl in piece.

"Hi there!" Naruto said in far too friendly a tone. "I bet you're dying to know my name right!?"

"I couldn't care less." Gaara said and I sighed because that just wasn't nice. "But you…" I frowned not remembering this part. "The girl with the eyes that have dealt death."

And I froze.

"What is your name?" He asked. I thought being singled out by Gaara would be more flattering but instead I felt a cold horror settle in my stomach. And I turned to face him with open eyes. And then I was Xelloss again and I was right in front of Gaara of the desert with a wide grin.

"You're an odd one Panda-chan." I laughed. "I like you." Gaara narrowed his eyes. "My name is Irenara Yukari." I said with a flourish I'd stolen from Mircea.

"I don't understand." Gaara grunted quietly.

"You're a cutie. I'm a Gemini, I like long bubble baths, and strawberries dipped in sugar-"

"How are you doing that?" Gaara demanded though his voice had not changed, he just had one of those tones I guess. One that commands those around you. And since I had absolutely no clue what he was talking about I put a finger to my lips.

"Now that is… a secret." And I laughed.

**-------------------------------------------------------- ---------------------------------------------------**

I examined Yukari's empty room and noted the subtle changes. The picture of team seven was propped on a desk next to five bed rolls that she had stacked on top of each other for comfort. Propped against the wall were several board games that I knew she played with Shikamaru on a regular basis. There was a closet full of clothes and a full length mirror next to it with a note toped on it that said in neat cursive, 'Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanokoniosis - longest word in the English language - is a lung disease from the inhalation of volcanic silica dust.'

I stared at this for a moment and felt myself smile. Odd.

She had left her sword behind when she had gone and met up with the team. I crossed the room and put a hand on Summer Storms head. He was sleeping with the sword, or on top of it anyway. It was almost like he was protecting it, though far more likely that he was just taking an nap there. It had been awhile since I'd seen the little guy. Actually, I thought, he was looking less little as of late…

Having her live with the Hyuga's was probably the best thing I'd ever done for Irenara Yukari even when taking her to the hospital hadn't helped.

Not that she had an actual place to live the real delemma became, Why wouldn't she heal?At least that's what I wanted to know, along with several other medics who couldn't satisfactorily explain what was wrong with my student. I wanted to ask her but I had a feeling she didn't know either. That wasn't safe for the profession she had chosen and that left me at a rather uncomfortable spot.

I picked up the picture of my team and blinked because at first I hadn't seen Yukari at all. But then there she was, behind Sakura who had kindly bent over so that the camera could see Yukari. She looked happy…

"It's because she doesn't want it to."

My head jerked quickly to the doorway where the girl had snuck up on me.

I was still unsure of what to think of Hanram Kanoke who was now living happily with Shikamaru by rule of his insistent mother. Usually she was fine, but at other times, like now, her pink eyes would glitter with a certain knowing that bothered me greatly.

"She thinks she deserves it. Some part of her won't let the wound heal. She'll be a slow healer either way, but the one in her stomach won't go away until she lets it." Kanoke said sagely.

"And when will that be?" I asked looking as bored as one can with most of his face covered, which is surprisingly bored actually.

"Some wounds never heal Kakashi, we both know that. Yuka's been through a lot, more then either of us know. She's lost her everything and she feels like it's all her fault. I'm not foolish enough to think that I can make up for Maya and heal my Yuka. I… I don't know if she'll ever get better…" Kanoke admitted the beginnings of tears forming in her eyes.

I lowered my gaze and frowned. If what she said was true…

It would be irresponsible of me to allow Irenara Yukari to compete in the Chunin Exams.

**AN: **WHOOT! I UPDATED! I know right, I can't believe it either. I did another scene of Yukari on morphine cuz its fun to write and I got a move on with the whole story. Not bad for over 28 pages? Longest chapter yet guys. ANYWHO I don't know if I like a lot of this chapter but I really need to update so forgive me alright. And yay twist at the end, awesome. Please review alright, opinions are nice and I take suggestions really well.

Next Time On 'Fuck, I Think My TV's Broken.' Kakashi tells and Yukari is furious, We finally meats Hyuga Neji, we get to freak out Sasuke and piss off a whole bunch of people, cuz that's what we do! Kabuto, A few other creepy genin get thrown here and there, Mircea, flamboyant and awkward gayness, and… Yukasha Kai. Next time in **Chapter 14: Midnight Games. **Please Review!


	16. Midnight Games Part 1

**AN: **I am a different person than I was when I began writing this fan fiction. I struggle constantly with the idea that I want to redo the entire story. However, my darling pointed out that It wouldn't really be the same, would it? It's precious to me because it's got bits of me still that I don't even have anymore. Or some other posh that managed to make me update without changing the whole story. So Okay, I'll continue and maybe some day I'll go back because I KNOW I can do better; maybe someday soon. Anyway, this isn't what you came here to read! You came here to read chapter 14, which is crazy and I love all of you automatically for coming this far with me. Anyway Chapter 14 is going to have to be done in parts because after writing it I realized that I promised stuff last chapter that just didn't happened at all here. But I don't wanna go back and change the post because then it posts a whole new chapter and that just makes people super angry. Haha. Other then that all you guys need to know is that I was gone for a very long time and it was very sad. But now I'm back so everything can be happy again! J

**Disclaimer: **I don't get paid enough to own Naruto, obviously, cuz if I did, I totally would. I don't actually own star bucks by the way. :P

Let get this party started

**Chapter 14... Part 1**

**Midnight Games**

**(Counting all the assholes in the room, Well I'm definitely not alone, well I'm not alone)**

_The night sky was clear considering I was in Tokyo. All sound had fallen away as I was pushed father toward the stars. Lights of boom sparkle red and gold danced beneath me and my seat swayed in a way that was not at all alarming. _

"_Amazing right?" A voice across from me stated._

_I made eye contact with him and was once more startled by that shade of blue. I had thought by now I would be used to Tanner's eyes. Apparently this was not so._

"_It's my first time." I admitted, or at least I heard myself admit. It was right, I knew I had never been on a fairs wheel before. Still, I could not help the little frown I knew was forming on my face, strictly from the eye contact. _

"_Don't look so worried, Yukari, this is perfectly safe." Tanner gave me a warm smile and instead of being reassured, I was doubly disturbed. No one knew me like Tanner did, though I'm not certain I'd ever admitted it to anyone. He had to know that this was not what was bothering me. I'd been in plenty more dangerous situations; between my father and… Zabuza…_

_My eyes widened, had that happened? Was this happening now? How was I here with Tanner when I knew… his eyes…_

"_It's been too long." He whispered. His royal blue locks dipped to hide his eyes and I wanted badly to smooth out the sudden lines on the parts of his face I could see. _

_His eyes had startled me because I had not seen them in months. _

"_Tanner… This is a dream." I said softly, reaching out to touch his shoulder and wondering what happened to figments of your imagination when you told them they weren't real. His hand snapped up to catch mine in a grip too tight to be comfortable._

_That's when I found out… they get mean._

"_You left me." His voice was harsh, though he had not raised it at all. "How could you when you knew…? You more then anyone else know…" He didn't finish, he didn't have to. I knew how he felt about abandonment, particularly after what happened with his brother._

"_I'm sorry, Tanner." And I was. I really was. His pain was something I'd never be acquainted with. It was a slow rip born from caring too much and it made him suffer like nothing I'd ever known. _

_At least the people I loved, loved me back._

"_I'm going to find you." His face snapped up and I was astonished by the determination I saw there. He had bags under his eyes that I had not noticed before. Strange dream I was having; to give him lines and bags that did not belong. I thought hard about it and tried to will them away. It was my dream after all._

"_I'm going to find my way to you, Yukari." And now he was dropping the honor-fic which was totally unlike him. "You can't just leave like that and expect me to sit on my ass like everything is all hunky dory." I mouthed the words 'hunky dory,' becoming more and more distracted by the turn my dream had taken. "God, I'm so mad you."_

_I felt my heart sink. So I was feeling guilty, was that it? This dream was born from my own quiet heart ache. It was always something. _

"_Damn it." I found myself saying through gritted teeth. Tanner seemed surprised but I plowed on, withdrawing my hand so that I might sit in a position more suited to sulking. _

"_Can't I have a happy dream? Just once? You know, like care bares or all you can eat ice cream or some shit? Now I just feel guilty all over again, for something I'm pretty sure wasn't entirely my fault in the first place. I can't possibly be the sole cause for everyone's misery, can I? That's a lot of misery." Still, even as I said it, I felt my eyes begin to burn. My hand clutched at the front of the shirt I was wearing, as though I could stop my heart from flying apart._

"_Oh my god, Yukari, you're real!" Tanner exclaimed, leaping from his seat to hug me. I shoved him off me before he got much of a chance._

"_What did I tell you about the touching!?" I growled and I was baffled when he began to laugh. _

"_You don't understand! You're real!" he insisted, from his place at my feet. His blue eyes lightened a shade or two. If asked, I would have told someone that they did that, but it surprised me all the same to see them sparkle._

"_Uh ya, I already told you that. Figured out that you're a dream ,huh?" God I wish I could take you with me. _

"_This is great, I'm so much closer-"_

I woke with a start, my heart speeding unnecessarily. It was quiet in the Hyuga compound but a storm raged outside. It was the kind of storm that would once have brought Maya to my room in search of comfort. The same kind of storm I had met Tanner during.

'People I've failed…' I gave a short humorless laugh. 'List just keeps getting longer and longer.'

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Having failed dismally at returning to my sleep, I took to skulking around the Hyuga Compound. There's no point in trying to call it anything else because it was definitely skulking. It was dark and the storm had me hunching into myself since, like a moron, I hadn't grabbed a coat and was currently running around in shorts and a tank top.

I plead sleep deprivation.

There were guards and everything, though no one moved to stop me, I suppose I wasn't much of a threat. I wanted badly to find Kano and leech her for entertainment but I wasn't sure how safe it would be go to Shikamaru's house and wake people up. I'd always held the idea that it would be a fatal experience. I mean, come on, they were genius's.

Thunder cracked loudly over me and rain pelted my exposed skin. I stopped and moved back to stand under the ledge of the compound itself. My hair was soaked to my scalp and my shoulders. Water was dripping from my nose. I inhaled deeply, loving the storm overhead.

So who could I irritate at this time of night?

Sakura was out, as was Hinata. I hadn't done the best job making friends or even acquainting myself with someone I could get a kick out of bugging at all hours. Sasuke would obviously be quite delightful but he would have so many questions that I just did not want to answer. Anything from where I was from to my meeting with Gaara were grounds I didn't wanna touch upon if I could avoid it.

It was times like these that made me miss Tanner, the brat. I couldn't count the times I'd woken him in the dead of night, climbing through his third story window like some kind of lunatic. The security system on his mansion was nothing short of amazing; he could have easily put an end to my visits if he decided to. He never had though, what's more he left his window unlocked.

I shook myself, not liking where my thoughts were going. After that dream it was impossible not to think of the boy I'd left behind. It was impossible not to feel guilty.

She would have clobbered me good if I hadn't yawned and stretched at exactly that moment.

To be honest I really wasn't sure what was going on for a good five seconds after it already started. Her hand was in front of me where my chest had just been before I'd thrown myself backwards to stretch. It was a small hand, but the nails were dainty and nice the way mine had been only when I'd received pampering.

My hand closed over her wrist on reflex as I examined her finger nails.

I dodged her oncoming foot by half a heartbeat and I shimmied my way under her in a pretzel twist, turning her unnaturally as I went by her wrist.

"Ugh," It was a brutish sound actually and she struggled well enough, but while the gentle fist was great and all, when it was all you were trained in even my physical strength proved useful.

However, the girl still had one free hand and her wrist was slick with rain, so I let her go and leapt away hoping to fight another day.

Let it not be said that Hyuga Hanabi is not determined.

"What on earth are you doing?" I shouted. The child was fast and I was dodging my the skin of my teeth alone.

"Fight me!" Hanabi demanded, swinging at me as I backed out of reach. I knew that if I slipped now I would have a lot more to worry about than scraped knees.

"Are you crazy?!" I screeched, knowing if I did and lost I'd never forgive myself but also considering that if I did and won her father would probably make sure I disappeared nice and quiet like.

"Fight me!" She insisted.

My pupils dilated and the girl before me bled into a memory of Saga Tanner, desperate to prove himself to the brother whose shadow stretched so far.

I had no weapons on me. The fight would be the same.

My hand darted out and grabbed her wrist once more, this time I angled it painfully and she dropped to her knees surprised. But I knew what hurt. I knew how to end this and nothing was different, nothing at all.

My axel kick hit her right in the throat.

I could probably have killed her if I'd done it a certain way but I'd never looked too deeply into that theory.

She fell before me, coughing and sputtering and I pinned her down making damn sure that those hands of hers would not be able to touch me.

"You got a problem, you little brat?!" I demanded, faltering only slightly as he became Hanabi again. Those veins popping out of her head really freaked me out.

"You're good." She acknowledged. The apathy in her voice was startling and rain pounded hard on my back.

"Ya… Thanks…" I responded in an off hand manner. I must have had my bewildered face on because I could see the amusement leaking into her pale eyes. "Are you going to attack me if I let you go?"

"No." She stated, and I weighed the honesty there, seeing as she kind of did take a pot shot at me while I wasn't even looking. Then I nodded and climbed to my feet. She stood after me.

We were silent for some moments as I waited for her to explain herself.

It never happed.

"You're good." She said again, this time the words sounded relieved. She turned to me, expression harsh and I thought for a moment she was going to attack me again. "You will teach my sister to be good also."

It didn't really sound like and request so I just nodded since mostly I knew Hinata was awesome and was going to be crazy awesome later, with or without me.

"Good." She said finally. Then she turned, and I was once more alone, though I was certainly less bored.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-

I had stolen eggs from the Hyuga Compound and gotten away with it. It had been over an hour since then and I still could not believe it.

Puttering around Naruto's kitchen was not as disgusting as I had expected. Actually it was a lot more depressing. There were a few dishes in the sink that were dirty and at first I had been impressed. I had expected more clothes on the floor as well; strictly as dirty as can be. I'm of the opinion that most little boys are dirty… practically another species entirely, really.

I shuffled the scrambled eggs around in the pan, pleased by their fluffy yellow-white awesomeness.

The devils in the details, my brother used to say.

Naruto's house had less security than a civilians, I can only hope and/or assume that the people who seemed to hate Naruto so, were of the idea 'out of sight out of mind.' There were so few dishes… there were so few clothes, and it was all Naruto owned. There was a picture of Naruto and the Hokage and one of us as Team seven. The people most precious to him. Other than the cracks the walls were a barren green and his kitchen table had a beginners guide to jutsu keeping it from wobbling. I thought perhaps, all together, the apartment might feel more lived in had it actually been dirty.

This was as close as he could get.

'I should have come here sooner.' I thought, feeling guilty. This whole other world thing wasn't as easy as I had hoped. To be honest, I don't know why I was surprised. But there you have it… Surprised. It's never about what you think and it's not what you wanted it to be. Still…

_I'm fine Maya, we're both fine. He'll never hurt you again! I promise! We're both gonna be fine!"_

I grit my teeth together trying, for once, to think about Naruto and not myself.

Still…

'**It's better than being back there…'**

I nodded, absentmindedly shifting the eggs onto a chipped plate.

Naruto's burners all burned at different temperatures so it was difficult to say exactly when the toast would be done, since I hadn't been expecting it and had really just thrown it on. However, I figured it was probably a safe bet that we'd wanna leave the veggies uncooked. I didn't have THAT much patience sheesh.

"Old Man? Is that you?" The drawl came from Naruto's room and frankly I'd bet money he'd been awake for awhile just trying to figure out what was different.

"Morning Orangeman!" I greeted with closed eyes and a cheeky grin. "Breakfast is just about done!"

There was a pause that I had not expected and I found myself peeking out to see what was stopping what should have been a flow of awesome thanking Yukari time.

Naruto was in shorts and white shirt. He'd gone all glassy blue eyes on me. Kimi knows what he was thinking.

I gave the plate an encouraging nudge in his general direction and then I smiled as his eyes cleared up and he opened his mouth to thank me-

"What the heck is that?" He shouted.

I literally fell over. Then I jumped up, a vein pulsing terribly in my forehead.

"What do you mean, 'What the hell is that!?' That's breakfast you ungrateful worm!" I screeched.

"I said 'heck' not 'hell' and that's not breakfast! I may look dumb but I don't know anyone who eats eggs for breakfast!"

"Why you little brat! It's western, it's a cultural sophistication."

"I don't care what you say it is, it's not breakfast food!" He insisted.

Something evil overcame me.

I put him in a head lock. "Eat it."

"NO!" He struggled, I held on.

"DOWN THE HATCH!" I shouted merrily and stuffed the scrambled eggs into his screaming mouth.

He swallowed and there was a moment of blessed silence in which he blinked and I became aware of the toast that was surely burning on the oven.

"It's good." he said softly.

"Mhmm," I palmed him on the back enthusiastically and he staggered forward to the table. "Eat up, we've got a hell of a day ahead of us and you're gonna need all the strength you can get!"

"Yukari-chan… Thank you." He sounded on the verge of tears.

"Yeah.."

He sat down staring at the food and I walked to the stove smiling in understanding, how strange this must be for him-

"Ewe vegetables!" He cried out. "Now I know you didn't find these in my house!"

"Naru-chan," I felt my grin take on a rather insane quality. "Eat your vegetables."

"But Yukari-chaaan, they're not even in Ramen… that's just… inhuman!"

Feeling playful. I scooped up the toast and flung it at him.

"AHH! Are you crazy!? That was on fire!"

-x-x-x-x-x- -x-x-x-x-x-x-

Since I was allowed back on the team officially it was only natural I walk to the bridge with Naruto that morning. We were a little late but I refused to leave until Naruto had brushed his teeth.

Sasuke opened his mouth to say something, no doubt, unwelcome, but I cut him off. I could tell by his glare it was probably snarky, but his blatant hostility worried me that he was going to question me some more. I just didn't have it in me this morning.

"Please Sasu-chan… Not today." I did my best to look pitiful and I think it actually worked. Sasuke's glare increased but his mouth closed and he turned away to watch the water rushing underneath the bridge.

It was quiet after that for some time. Sakura occasionally tried to engage Sasuke in conversation and Naruto would occasionally get angry but for the most part it was quiet. To be honest I was starting to feel really sorry for the pink haired menace.

And then something happened that no one saw coming.

Sakura Cracked.

"AHHH!" She screeched, and it was a shrill sound that made my face hurt. Birds took flight and I almost fell off the rail. "Why why Why!? It's always the same!" She shouted vehemently, hands clenched tightly into fists and eyes white with fury.

"Jesus Pinky, what the fuck's gotten into you?" I asked a bit reproachfully. To her credit she was either so angry she didn't notice the flippant swear or she had just gotten used to it, because she didn't so much as flinch.

"Arg! It's always the same! He sets the time and then we have to wait hours for him!" She shouted stomping her foot once for good measure. I shrugged but Naruto threw his fist in the air in agreement.

"It's not Fair!" He shouted. I scratched my cheek in something akin to irritation. In my opinion this was getting a bit loud. Sasuke seemed to be having similar thoughts.

"What about my feelings, huh!?" Sakura continued and the voice in my head chuckled in amusement. "I rushed here so fast I didn't even have time to blow dry my hair!?"

**Poor thing, that really is a tragedy**

I grinned slyly.

"Aweee Pinky, you didn't have to get all made up just for me." I winked. "I like a little wild."

Sakura turned a really interesting shade of red.

And then she swung at me!

"YUKARI! DON'T EVEN JOKE ABOUT THAT!"

I ducked, rolling off the ledge of the bridge in a swift motion. I slid myself behind Sakura so I could play with her hair.

"No really, you got a bit of a curl going on back here. I can dig it."

Naruto made a noise of confusion that seemed louder than it should have and scratched his head for good measure. "I don't get it… Why would Sakura-chan wanna look good for Angel-chan?"

I put on my Cheshire cat smile and waggled my fingers in a way that usually effectively disturbed my audience.

"Orangeman, didn't you hear?"

"NO YUKARI, WE ARE NOT GOING HERE AGAIN."

"There's no need to be ashamed of our love cherry blossom. Pinky has the hots for me now." Then just cuz I wanted to see Sakura's face could get any darker I said, "No pink haired Uchiha's in the future, I'd say."

Naruto seemed to be stuck on the phrase 'pink haired Uchiha's,' when he said something rather delightful.

"Oooooooooh Is that why you never went out with me, Sakura-chan?" There was a vein throbbing in Sakura's temple. "That makes so much sense! Gosh ya, Sakura, it sure is strange. I still like you and everything. You shouldn't have to hide who you are-"

THWACK

**Poor Naruto.**

"Sa, I was only joking, Pinky, no need to get your panties in a twist." I paused. "Unless, of course, you didn't have time for that either. In which case, you should know for future reference that you don't have to wear underwear at all."

She swung at me again.

"Well you know, 'god hates a panty line.'"

Swing.

"Commando helps save kittens?"

WOOOSH, that one was kinda close

"No underwear today keeps the… hunter-nin away?"

Sakura blinked at me, still breathing rather heavily, as I successfully executed a sweat drop.

**That made no sense.**

'Damn it, I know, I got caught up!'

"Relax Pinky, we've been here before remember? I'm not gay." I waved off, recalling my disturbing conversation with my other half. I squinted in irritation. Other third? I did get a new voice. It happened, no going around it. Bahhh, questions for later. Sakura looked pretty pissed.

"I thought you said that didn't happen!?"

'Oh ya, I did deny that didn't I?'

"I don't know what you're talking about. Creamsicle-kun, whatever could she be talking about?" I said dramatically. I saw Sasuke twitch and look away determinedly. "How about you, Naruto darling? Do you remember that ever happening?"

Naruto shook his head but Sasuke spun around fast, his face sporting a furious expression.

"Yo." We all looked up and found Kakashi in a poof of smoke perched atop the high wood on the bridge. He gave us a harmless wave. "Good morning everyone! Sorry I'm late, I got lost on the path of life!" He explained and I gave him a grin because boy was he in for it. As if on que, Naruto and Sakura both pointed in fury.

"YOU LIAR!" They shouted together. I think their heads may have even gotten bigger, but I wouldn't have bet money on it, cuz that just doesn't make sense.

However, Kakashi took it all in stride. He leapt down to join us with one of his eye crinkled smiles. I took a moment to wonder if he ever got hot underneath that mask. It probably gave him terrible acne or something.

"I know this is a bit sudden," He began, Sakura fumed but Naruto already seemed to be over it. Sasuke, for his part, would not stop glaring at me and it was getting hard to ignore. Thankfully, what came next seemed to be enough to distract the grumpy Uchiha. "But I recommended you for the Chunin Exames."

My eyes widened; it was time.

"These are the application forms." He continued holding the papers out to us.

"Application forms." Sakura said in what wasn't so much a question as it was an annoyed statement.

"You're repeating me, Sakura." Kakashi said in a sing song voice. "This is all voluntary, it's up to each of you. If you don't feel ready, you can wait until next year."

**As if.**

I gave a soft snort in agreement.

"ALRIGHT!" Naruto whopped launching himself at out sensei in a gleeful hug and swiping his application. "Kakashi-sensei, you rock!"

"Don't slobber on my vest." Kakashi complained but there was no real feeling behind it. Although, I suspect he was not used to the contact. "If you want to take the exams just sign the applications and come to room 301 at the academy. It's at 3pm five days from now." He continued. Five days wasn't very far away, and I really hadn't done enough planning.

"Kakashi-sensei…" Sakura began after taking the rest of the papers. "There's only three of them."

'No fucking way.'

"Yes Sakura, I know." Kakashi said. I shook my head in disbelief.

"But sensei, there's four of us." Sakura pointed out, which was lovely since I couldn't seem to find my voice.

"Yes Sakura, I can count you know." His voice was light but I couldn't see why.

Why did this have to happen? And after I just decided to protect them.

"Yukari will not be participating."

**How Dare He**

'I don't understand… I did everything, I'm apart of this team, damn it!'

**I'll be damned if he insults us like this.**

'What did I do wrong?' I thought feeling a little helpless.

**You did nothing, my Yukari! Do not be foolish, you are perfect!**

To his credit, Naruto was furious on my behalf. "But sensei, that's not fair! Yukari has more than proven herself, why shouldn't she get to compete!? It's not right! We're a team and-"

"Naruto!" Kakashi's voice cracked like a whip and Naruto fell silent. "Yukari is not yet healthy enough for this exam. Would you send her in there as she is now to get hurt or even die?"

**Get hurt… or even die** the voice snarled, clearly insulted. **I would never allow it!**

"You ass hole." I said quietly, and suddenly all eyes were on me. "In front of my team no less." I was so angry I could barely breath and I felt my chakra raise in response.

"It's fine Naruto!" I bit out as I saw him open his mouth in protest.

I could have saved them, I could have done something. And now I was being shut out because of what? The rules? 'You've got to be fucking kidding me.' everything would play out without me there, and Sasuke would be marked.

Kakashi looked at me lazily and I shook my head slowly and swallowed my chakra down. It was the strangest feeling, a burning in the back of my throat, my nose and eyes stung, and my god I was angry.

"You have no idea what you just did." I managed to say, I turned, and began to walk.

**-x-x-x-x-x-Sasuke-x-x-x-x-x-**

The Chunin Exames were upon me. I could face countless of powerful ninja including that guy with the gourd on his back. I should have been excited.

Instead I was Angry.

And whose fault was this?

Whose fault was it always?

Yukari Irenara.

I had been surprised to see her on the bridge this morning.

I had almost welcomed her back.

But god forbid she except anything as normal as that. Why had she arrived with Naruto? And why, only when she looked my way, did her face take on that traumatized expression? She had looked half broken and when she pleaded with me not to speak to her and it worked in everyone's favor. I couldn't have spoken, after seeing her face, if I had tried.

It made me feel guilty and that in turn me angry, because none of this was my fault, damn it!

And then she had the gall to use Naruto's name. Not Orangeman or Kit or whatever other names she adopted for the idiot; his birth name. She had to be all drugged up to use my name and there she went in casual conversation using his. What made him so special? I wasn't just a Uchiha damn it, I was Sasuke. Not Popsicle or Ice Cube or whatever. Sasuke!

I had never so badly wanted someone to use my name. Sakura over did it but it couldn't possibly kill that horrid Irenara to say it once or twice like any normal person would!

Always hiding and smiling and talking about almost nothing and things I didn't understand. Her favorite color was um… Purple? She'd mentioned that once hadn't she? She liked Ice cream? And was it… Vampires?

I couldn't seem to remember. I hadn't been paying much attention and I regretted it.

What did that leave me with? She had a dog and a sword. She had friends; Hinata, Kanoke, and Kai, though I didn't see what made him so great. And someone called Tanner… and now she seemed to be hanging out with Naruto… Someone named 'Shura.'

I felt a headache coming on.

She was from… somewhere. She had… some relatives obviously, who doesn't have relatives… except for me… and maybe Naruto… I was furious. Who the hell was she anyway!?

Some part of me knew I was being irrational to direct all my anger, which was a lot, at Yukari. However, it was a pretty small part, so it was pretty easy to drown out. I wondered if this was my breaking point and which part of the day had made me reach it.

Kakashi was right, Yukari was in no condition to compete in these exams. They were big for a reason and while people didn't die often, sending her in there as weak as she was now, could easily be a death sentence.

An image of her lifeless body on the bridge in the Land of Waves flashed before me. Surely that had only occurred because we had been foolish enough to let her fight that day. She was strong and sure but that was no sissy injury she was hiding underneath that shirt. I don't know where it came from or how long it's been there. _Another god damn secret, no doubt_! The fact was, we knew it was there and sent her to fight anyway. She could have easily died and Kakashi would be a bad sensei to make the mistake twice.

But she had been so angry, on the verge of tears I'd say; if I didn't know better.

That's when I heard the retching.

I had separated from the others in my fury and parted in the same direction as Yukari. I hadn't even really considered it. I had been sure, the moment the thought occurred to me, that I wasn't likely to find her even if I did fallow.

And yet here she was, the cause of all my problems.

Currently the cause of all my problems was being violently ill all over the grass.

I blinked slowly, but the image did not change.

Yukari was knelt on the ground, one hand on a tree helping keep her upright, the other hand holding back her own hair.

"Fuck!" She shouted, after catching her breath. "That's ridiculous and you know it, now shut up, your god damn commentary is not needed at the moment!"

She spoke to some person that I was sure wasn't there. Perhaps imaginary or a delusion on some level, that would surely explain a lot. A voice in her head? I suspected she had several.

And then she was violently ill again.

I considered walking away.. I strongly considered walking away. In fact I was about to walk away when she said something that stilled my entire body.

"I can't protect Sasuke without being in the exams. That's when the snake is going to strike. I've got to figure something out."

Before I knew what was happening I was moving towards her and my brain wasn't working at all. The fact that she thought she had to protect me was insulting enough, but hearing her use my name made me feel unreasonably like I should not have cornered her and raved on about how she didn't trust us. And damn, how on earth did she expect to protect anything looking so weak?

"Hey." I said quietly.

Despite the situation, I could not help but be a tad impressed at how quickly she moved. She had me pinned in a moment, one of her legs viced down effectively over my own while the other pinned my left arm. In one hand was the dagger I'd seen on occasion positioned at my throat as the other busied itself by holding down my wrist.

In the space of two heart beats my irritation sparked and died.

Her eyes were red all over. A red that had nothing to do with their natural color and everything to do with her reactions today. It looked like she had been crying but there were no tear stains on her face. From there I watched her turn angry.

"What do you want from me, Uchiha?" Her lips bled from where they'd been bitten but her hands were ever steady, blade ever pleasant.

"I'd appreciate it if you got off of me." The calm monotone that had served me for years took up it's role gracefully.

Her tongue darted out to swipe the blood off her lips but she rolled off me after a moment, kneeling on the ground. The grass underneath her fingers began to smolder.

"I'm falling apart." I could hear the sheer disbelief in her voice and I wondered why she didn't just cry and get it over with already. Her hand moved absently to rub over her stomach and I frowned thinking of the wound that lay there.

"It's amazing how they hold you back, even after death." She said quietly, I scooted closer hoping to hear more. I was disappointed when she didn't speak. Her hair hid her face from me and I would not put it passed this girl to have fallen asleep in that position. Still I wondered, if the face that I could not see was crying silently.

"You know," I began, not entirely sure why I was here at all. "The Chunin Exames happen twice a year and not all of us are going to pass. You should stop sulking and continue to train till that day comes."

"Now that was unexpected." She said quietly and I knew she was laughing at me. "Uchiha gives an inspirational speech. You just don't get it."

I felt my anger rise. _Ungrateful little_

"There's something I have to do. I need to do." My eyes widened. Yukari was confiding in me? That was… crazy. "Something… you just have no idea."

"If you told me, I would know." I shot back, it was her fault if I judged her with little information because she would provide me with nothing more. This was not my fault damn it!

**- x-x-x-x-x-Yukari-x-x-x-x-x-**

He couldn't know. He had no idea. I needed to save them because if I didn't what good was I anyway? I couldn't keep Maya. But I refused to loose Sasuke. Still it was beginning to look hopeless.

**Yukari, you need to calm down**

"Damn it."

Something flashed in his eyes and I reached for him sensing his flight responses kicking in. I wanted to tell him, I realized. I wanted so badly just to tell him. And maybe it would save him. And he would see what happens to kin slayers. And then he would know how our tears dry up and leave us to retch on the ground at our feet. Then he would see the horror and maybe he would pause to think before he left this village that was probably doomed anyway. Then maybe he would remember his crazy teammate when he betrayed his team.

**Pull yourself together, Yukari. What will this accomplish?!**

"Would you like to know?" I asked in a slow whisper, but he did not move. The grass around us began to smoke and turn black as my grip on my chakra waned. "You always seem to want to know."

"What did this to you?" He asked quietly, he looked disturbed. I was surprised. Of all the questions I knew he wanted to ask, this one had never crossed my mind.

"I did this to myself obviously." I gave him a calculating look and thought about the cons and pros of a dramatic speech. "We are not so different you and I. It's all about loving and loosing. Some deeper meaning of life; something poetic and gory and dark and beautiful. Things you couldn't stop or change. People that couldn't be saved, or could they just weren't. How you love them and you hate them and you love to hate them cuz it's all you really got to hold on to." I paused shortly as his eyes widened.

I stepped away from Sasuke and smiled knowingly. My hands would start to burn him soon if I did not back away. "The ending's the same. I have made so many mistakes. I bled for them, I killed for them! I have played with people on strings and acted the role of god. I have lied and lied and lied and failed again and again and again." I grinned at him though I felt nausea raising up again. I hoped I wouldn't puke on him.

**Enough, my Yukari, you're being over dramatic** the voice said softly, tenderly.

I could not help it, I laughed. I laughed hard in the face of what had just occurred. How obnoxious.

**-x-x-x-x-x-Sasuke-x-x-x-x-x-**

And now she was laughing like some kind of damn lunatic. What on earth was wrong with her? I didn't know where to start the questions with what she had just said, and though I should have tried to calm her down, instead I was angry and I was going to voice it.

"I don't know who you think you are, but you have no idea what I've been through, or what I have to do, and am going to do." She raised an eyebrow but I kept my voice cold and my eyes flat. "You fool around with your pretty words, your nicknames, and your secrets, and you think it's all fine and dandy. Well it's not and I'm tired of it and I'm tired of you. I don't care anymore. Go back where you came from, Irenara Yukari. You've got too many secrets and I do not want to know them."

The finality of my statement seemed to stun her. She had the gal to look hurt.

"That's really no way to speak to a lady." A voice cut in. Yukari looked as baffled as I felt and I examined the new comer.

He was taller than me and obviously a few years older. His hair was tied back much the same as my brother had done it and I disliked him on sight for it. That and the way he leaned casually against the tree. The way a coat was slung over his shoulder. These things alone should not have made me dislike him. Something else was there, but I couldn't say what.

"Mercia?" My attention came back to Yukari. She knew this man, used his name… Another person of hers that I had never met, like Kai. It wasn't a good first impression.

"Lady Irenara." the man called Mercia bowed lithely, forming a smile in our direction. I had a moment to be surprised by how he addressed before he spoke again. "I am sorry to interrupt what appears to be a very dramatic scene." He didn't even have the decency to pretend he hadn't seen anything.

Yukari shrugged. "I dunno, it was getting pretty damn obnoxious to be honest. I could almost thank you." She walked toward him, away from me. I did not move.

He took her hand and was about to place a kiss on her wrist but she withdrew. "I told you not to do that it's creepy."

"Hmm." He acknowledged and I could not speak or move as his gaze flicked to mine. "Your friend, no doubt, he seems to know you well." A slow sinister smile began to form.

"You leave him alone, Mercia." Yukari said sternly but I noticed her flush and that was interesting. Had I ever seen her do it before? Was this man dangerous? Was Yukari protecting me even now, after all I had said?

What was going on?

**-x-x-x-x-x-Yukari-x-x-x-x-x-**

There was something about Mercia that I liked despite myself and his timing never hurt either. What Sasuke had said shocked me, made me uncomfortable. Mercia had allowed me to catch my breath. That didn't mean I was gonna let him traumatize Sasuke like he had done to me. Behind the flamboyancy was real talent and heart. But to get there you had to go pretty far in. Most of the time he was just really… touchy feely?

"So what's with the social call, Merica?" I asked, wondering what it was that had him leading me out of this clearing with my positively irate teammate.

"A banquet is to be held at the compound in honor of our Lady Hinata's entrance into the Chunin Exames." He started with a flourish. I nodded, that made sense.

"When is that going to be?" I started, worrying that it was tonight. Tonight I just wanted to sleep.

"It will be the day after tomorrow. I understand that It is short notice but we were only informed of her participation this morning." There was a distinct glint in his eye that made me apprehensive. "You will need a Kimono for the occasion."

I twitched, and now I knew why he had that damn sneaky look on his face.

"Gosh, you know, that's really great for Hina-chan," I started, trying to think of something fast, "and I'm real grateful for the invite but this is a pretty big deal, I don't think I'm qualified to attend formal Hyuga stuffs."

Mercia laughed and within in it I heard my doom.

"You jest, surely My Lady. You are a clan heir, the last in fact. You are talented and young; they may attempt to use you but do not take it too personally that is simply their way. And of course," He pulled me much closer to him than I thought necessary his fingertips just a breath away from my face, "You are lovely."

Despite the awkwardness of the situation, I was appropriately puffed up.

I grinned, wondering if I was blushing. It was so hard not to like Mercia.

"Alright just gimme a moment, would ya?" He nodded and I turned back to Sasuke. He had not so much as moved a muscle this whole time, except perhaps to narrow his eyes in my general direction. I walked back to him feeling the freedom of my irritation assist in my next words.

"You're dumb." I stated thrusting my index finger into his chest. His eyes widened and he opened his mouth to speak but I would have none of that. " All I want is to protect those around me including you and I'm upset and decidedly hurt that you don't trust me." I took a breath knowing just how to make these last words count.

"Trust me, Sasuke." He jumped at the use of his name. His eyes widened but I turned from him before he could speak. Some part of me hoped he felt extremely guilty, the other part was just tired of feeling responsible for everything.

"Lady Yukari, you look a little disheveled. Perhaps you'd like to freshen up before your fitting?" Mercia said softly, I was certain Sasuke could not hear us.

I lifted my hand towards him expectantly and he tucked it into the crook of his arm as I knew he would.

He dutifully led me away from my teammate, who I noticed had still not moved. I said, "Come now Mercia. I like you better when you're oblivious."

He grinned broadly, almost bowling me over by the sheer charm he exuded. "As you wish, my lady." That should be illegal. I lowered my eyelids and looked away in what I hope wasn't too obvious an escape.

"And Mercia… I'm going to need to bathe."

"Of course, Lady Yukari."

**-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-**

"Can it be black?"

"No no no black is tacky for such an occasion. This is a celebration not a funeral."

"Well shit Mercia we're not getting anywhere."

"You must pick a color." He insisted.

My head was about to explode. I had, in my arms, seven different fabrics and I was not quite sure how it had happened. It had started out with one that I had causally picked up from an elaborate array of colors. From there Mercia had been throwing them at me. The room itself was rather impressive. There were decorative materials everywhere. Every countertop had a pair of scissors on it. Balls of strink were randomly strewn about the floor. Well they hadn't started out that way, but Storm thinks he's a cat. So there you have it.

"I have! I've picked three and you just shot all of them down!"

"Lady Yukari, I had very good reasons to suggest you not wear those colors." He began and I scowled because this was stupid and I shouldn't have to do it. "The Lady Hinabi has chosen green and Lady Hinata has chosen Purple these are colors that, while I'm sure would look lovely on you, you must not wear the same as the masters' daughters. It would be seen as an insult. And of course, black is tacky."

I could see where it all made sense but I had weird eyes. It could often be really difficult to find a color that looked nice with them.

"I think Hina-chan should wear orange." I said grinning.

"Orange?" Mercia looked positively baffled.

"Mhmm bright orange and I intend to tell her so." I fancied the idea that she would take me up on the suggestion and I would get to wear purple.

"Ehm…" He cleared his throat regaining his footing in an area that was his expertise. "Though I cannot fathom where bright orange comes into play, the matter of YOUR color still remains the point of interest."

"Fuck it, you pick it." I grunted tossing the many fabrics at him in a rainbow of color. He stumbled trying to catch them and only managed to snag three while another hit him in the face. I turned and left without any farther warning.

Mercia looked at the fabric in his left hand… and smiled.

**-x-x-x-x-x-Kanoke-x-x-x-x-x-**

I couldn't find Shikamaru and I did not like it, no sir not one bit.

I wandered around konoha alone for the first time. Though I knew I was being unreasonable I could not help the feeling of dread that crept up on me. It was like back in that forest, that horrible forest with the shadows that did not rest. I wanted to forget that place existed.

I had become unbearably fond of Shikamaru in my short time here. He was the first person I really understood. He made sense to me. It was crazy how practical and mature he was. His freaky hair was only a bonus.

He was trying to teach me to play chess but I purposefully messed up so he'd spend more time with me.

"You're hopeless." He'd say and I'd whine because I knew my act wasn't convincing him. Not Shikamaru.

I had decided to tell him. I had to tell SOMEONE! Yukari was so pale and she would take on the world I just knew it. But she shouldn't have to.

Shikamaru could help, I was sure. But I couldn't find him. He wasn't in any of his usual cloud watching spots… Believe me, I know, his mom told me every one of them.

Someone was watching me. I was suddenly very aware of that fact. There was no reason behind my belief, other then the fact that I knew, beyond the shadow of a doubt, that someone was watching me. From them I felt such horrible malicious intent that I had al together stopped breathing. A cold sweat broke over my forehead and I paused, then kept going. If I didn't show that I knew whatever it was, was there, maybe it would leave me alone.

In spite of this hope I began walking faster. There were people all around me. Out of the corner of me eye I saw the hint of black and the tell tale purple that made my mouth go dry.

I turned slowly, horror creeping up on me, though I was unsure as to why. I knew there was only one person that this could have been. I knew it had not been the last I would see of him… but I had hoped.

"Well hello again, Kanoke-chan. Fancy meeting you here."

Yukasha Kai smiled at me, and I felt my skin crawl.

**-x-x-x-x-x-Yukari-x-x-x-x-x-**

**Yukari, what are you doing?**

The voice sounded panicked today I notice from my perch. It was actually quite early but it had taken me all day to decide upon this and there really was no going back now. I couldn't wait another day, I was much too antsy.

It was then that I noticed my prey appearing. I crouched a little lower and made sure to breath extra quiet.

**Yukari, what are you doing?**

I launched myself at him, skillfully breaking the glass in a way that would not hurt me. I had a moment to see his eyes widen before I was on him.

'I'm kidnapping Sasuke, Of course.'

**-x-x-x-x-x-Sasuke-x-x-x-x-x-**

I hated even to think it, but I was glad she hadn't taken my harsh words to heart.

"Mrff a ra ur vroooo."

I took another sip of tea not taking my eyes off Yukari's form, bound and gagged though it was. I had a sneaking suspicion she could escape if I didn't pay enough attention.

"Vrooooooooooo."

She continued; she must have been feeling rather vocal, though I could not imagine what she was trying to say through the gag that came out like that.

Yukari probably didn't know this, but I faced kidnapping attempts on what was almost a daily basis. While they were not usually done by girls as skilled as the one in front of me that did not mean I had not been prepared. Fangirls have, in the past, shown abnormal strength and agility that I had learned long ago not to underestimate.

"Vrooooooooooooo."

Still, I had not expected Yukari to attempt such a thing. I had not even really expected her to talk to me again so soon after the fiasco a few days prior, when I had screamed at her.

"_Trust me, Sasuke."_

My name again, being used against me. Said with the power she'd bestowed upon it strictly by being the one who said it. It made me shocked and perhaps even ashamed at my behavior. And then she was gone, having left with a man whose name came easily off her lips.

I had looked everywhere for her the day before, just to see her, see how she treated me. I had been struck by the chilling thought that she had left with an older man that I had never seen before. One I'd even thought may be dangerous. What if I never saw her again? The idea should have pleased me; this was not so. I had returned to my house unsuccessful and the silence in my own home had been suffocating. I felt an unreasonable relief at having her tied up on my kitchen floor. Relief and a crazy crazy sense of hope, that just maybe things could go back to normal.

Yukari didn't really need a reason to kidnap me, did she? That was just the kind of thing she did, wasn't it? Maybe Naruto and Sakura were already tied up somewhere as some crazy team bonding thing.

That didn't seem too out of the ordinary, did it?

"Vroooooooooooo." Yukari thrashed violently, chewing on her gag like an animal. I shook my head, resisting the urge to smirk. Placing my tea cup back on the table I decided, enough was enough.

"Vroooooooooooo." She blinked a couple of times, realizing I had removed the gag. This time I did smirk.

"Vroo?" I said softly and she cracked a grin that did not make me uneasy since I could still see her eyes. When you couldn't see Yukari's eyes, it usually meant trouble.

"Weeeeeeell," She sang, sitting up so as to come eye to eye with my crouched form. "It just seemed more appropriate if I struggled and stuff, right? That's what people who get tied up do, ne?" I didn't really have an answer for that so I remained silent. "No, I mean it. If I had kidnapped you and it had actually worked, I would be very disappointed if you didn't struggle and make strange vocal noises."

"So why the morning kidnap?" I asked, sitting back on my heels. I forced myself not to hold my breath. I needed to seem as bored as possible.

"Silly Sasu-chan," oh no, her eyes closed. "Obviously I was going to take you away and have my naughty fan girl way with you till you were bruised, dehydrated and completely subservient."

I fell over and to my complete mortification my face was heating up badly.

"What the hell, Yukari?!" I sputtered, trying to reclaim some of my dignity.

"Aweee, It's okay, sweetie." Yukari crooned next to my ear. Before I could move she embraced me, holding my head tightly to her body like one would someone severely injured. "I'm so sorry, Popsicle! I didn't mean to give horrifying fan girl flashbacks!" She announced tragically. "Did they do horrible things to you?! Tell me…" Her hands moved, grabbing me by the face and when she spoke next we were basically nose to nose. At some point I had stopped breathing. "Did they _touch_ you, Sasu-chan?" She whispered.

My breath came wooshing out and I shoved her away hard. As embarrassed as I was, this was the Yukari I had hoped to find, not that tragic creature I had found days before; Bitter, haunted, violent, and spitting riddles of disaster as easily as most people breath. I tried not to be too angry that she seemed to have reverted to the nickname.

"Aren't you even gonna ask how I got my hands free?"

"No." I spat, immediately irritated that I hadn't thought to wonder something so important.

"Tch, well fine." She pounced.

**-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-**

It was humiliating.

Yukari had carried me all the way to the Hyuga compound. Why did she do that, you ask? Well I assume it's because one has a very difficult time walking while their feet are roped together so efficiently.

I HATED that she had caught me so unawares even after I KNEW she had been trying to kidnap me. I quietly seethed trying hard to slip out of the bindings, having never been so effectively restrained in my entire life. I would not give her the satisfaction of being the loud writhing prisoner that she wanted.

Bridle style.

I was Uchiha Sasuke damnit! You do not carry me Bridle style.

"It's just easier this way." She had said.

I glared and glared and glared and glared, hoping that somehow my bloodline limit would manifest daggers to impale my captor.

And why hadn't the villagers helped? Obviously this was not normal. Didn't they give a damn that their Damn Uchiha heir had been hogtied and was being carried off to Kami knew where?

When I got free, EVERYONE was going to have to die.

Two days till the Chunin Exams and it was impossible to miss the foreigners casting strange looks in our direction, no doubt shrugging off my current dilemma as something strange and perverse.

This couldn't be happening. Still I glared. Stupid Yukari, I couldn't even be that surprised this is just what she did. Like some kind of crazy force of nature. Ya that was it. Yukari was some kind of hurricane and I'd forgotten to purchase flood insurance and now my whole world was fucked.

Hurricane Yukari.

"HI PANDA-CHAN!" Yukari shouted. I craned my neck around to find whoever she was addressing. It was the kid with the gourd one his back. The one called Garra. He turned, fixing us with his stare and I felt burning rage at Yukari for putting me in this position; this pathetic position. I straitened and glared hard at him, daring him to do anything.

She hadn't said his name either. The thought did wonders to calm me.

The blonde girl next to him gave a bemused sort wave and Yukari continued on her merry way. I kept eye contact with the red head till Yukari's body made it physically impossible.

That was when I saw Kakashi. He was walking casually down the street, little orange book in hand. I saw a chance and began moving my eyes frantically. He was a jonin, he would notice something was amiss. As if hearing my silent pleas he stopped in front of us.

"Well hey there Yukari…" He looked at me thoughtfully then added with a nod, "Sasuke."

"Hi there, Shi-chan." Kakashi gave her a befuddled look and I cursed her genius. The nickname was a brilliant distraction. "I'm still very mad at you for what you did to me last time we saw each other." She said with a smile.

Double damn.

"Maaa," He brushed off with a wave. "Is there any particular reason you have Sasuke tied up on this fine morning?" He inquired. My eyes darted between the two of them. Was there anything she could say that wouldn't result in my rescue. Surely my jonin sensei would-

"Foreplay." Yukari responded with cheekily. I choked a little and began once more trying to chew through the gag.

"Oh," Kakashi said, and then to my horror. "Carry on." And he walked by.

I slumped against her feeling defeated and let her carry me several more blocks without incident. How do these things even happen?

"You should eat more, Sasukins. You're awfully light."

I jerked violently at the new nickname, slamming roughly into the ground as Yukari dropped me in the road. A damn tease too close to my name for me not to notice how close she was coming these days just to saying it altogether.

I HATED how happy it made me to hear it, how I waited for it like some pathetic creature. Even now, tied up as I was, miserable and so SO ANGRY. I still wanted to hear it.

My train of thought was cut off by Yukari's grimace as she reached to pick me up again. There was pain on the corners of her mouth and I noticed, with horror, that her stomach was bleeding again; her white shirt not being the best thing ever to hide it. Had I really jerked that hard? And why hadn't that wound healed over yet? It had been over a month, my jerking couldn't have really have reopened the damn thing... could it?

And yet there it was.

"Sorry about this, Uchiha." I frowned under my gag, "You're just gonna have to deal with the blood till I can bandage the damn thing. I guess I didn't think this out too well."

I was quiet and still for the rest of our journey.

**-x-x-x-x-x-Yukari-x-x-x-x-x-**

Having dumped Sasuke onto my bedroll I realized that I had not planned up until this point. Surely the Hyuga knew he was here with those eyes of theirs. But I only needed to keep him here through tomorrow. Then he couldn't take the Chunin Exams and he would be safe. Konoha would still get attacked but Orochimaru would never look at the Hyuga Compound for Sasuke and I had lots of time to plan for the invasion.

**Yukari, darling, this is insane.**

I smarted at the idea that the voice in my head may actually be right this time.

I would have to keep Sasuke here for months to get this right, and even then who was to say they wouldn't come for him. I couldn't always be here. What if they found him alone and tied up like this. Easy pickings. But Sasuke would never learn the Chidori from Kakashi…. Or would Kakashi have found him in my room by that point, since I was the last person he was seen with.

**See, this was an awful idea. I don't like him being here on your bed, where would you even sleep? No this was not a good idea, Yukari.**

The voice sounded so disapproving that I could not help the anger that rose in me.

'SHUT UP' I snarled at him… at myself? Ugh, he shut out completely like he wasn't even there. I was surprised that that had worked so well.

"Irenara-sama, I brought your kimono for tonight's events." I glanced at the doorway, knowing Akira was on the other side eager to serve.

I slid it open and smiled brightly at him doing my best to block his view to my room using only my head. I snatched the classy white bag the no doubt contained my fancy kimono for later tonight. I honestly have no idea how I intended to pull this off.

"Well hey there, kido!" He blinked at me in surprise. I almost never answered the door. Usually I just yelled 'come in,' or something equally as lazy. He was pleased to see me nonetheless and a pretty little blush let up his cheeks at how close our faces had ended up. "Be a doll and get me some fresh bandages would you?"

Akira started at that, his eyes widening in concern. It was kinda sweet really.

"Are you injured, Irenara-sama!?" He asked urgently but I brushed him off.

"Don't be silly, it's just a little scratch. But if you could bring some extra bandages too so I won't have to bother you next time I get a little scratch that would be great."

He seemed doubtful so I shut the door in his face. It was kind of rude but I needed to figure out how to deal with Sasuke and that was kinda taking up all my attention right now.

He seemed to have taken the time to make himself comfortable on my bed, propped against the wall and all. I knew his eyes had been fallowing my interaction with Akira closely. Summer's Storm, who come to think of it I had not seen in days, had cuddled up to Sasuke quite nicely. It was sweet actually, like he was guarding him or something. Or... I paused to think, like he was trying to shove him off the bed.

But that was silly.

I congratulated myself for having made it this far with him as my captive. I had spent the entire other day in the library trying to find just the right knot to use that Sasuke could not escape. We stared at each other for a long time while I waited for Akira to return. What on earth was I gonna do with Sasuke? I couldn't just let him go, not with how much I'd spent on the rope just to get this damn far.

I should have enlisted help or something. Kanoke…. Who I also hadn't seen for a couple of days…. I grimaced trying to figure out what I had been doing with my time that I wasn't seeing the people closest to me. Kanoke probably needed me too, that was the unfortunate thing. I'd just dumped her on Shikamaru and that was that. Ino was probably pissed.

I jumped when Akira's voice floated through the door yet again just before the little bugger opened it all on his own. His cheeks were red and his arms were full of bandages, much more than I'd need.

"I came as quick as I could." He admitted breathlessly. I tried to remember that he was just being sweet and I didn't need to punch him through the wall for busting into my room.

"Wow, thank you." I said, grabbing the bundle and depositing the majority of it on the floor while sorting out what I'd need.

I became eerily aware of the fact the Akira hadn't left yet and I glanced up to find out why the hell it had fallen so silent if he was still in the room. Akira as staring intently behind me at what could only be Sasuke. His shock was quickly being overcome with something else.

"Team bonding." I said with a toothy grin but his eyes only flicked to me then went back to Sasuke. He was soooo tense. I knew how to take care of this.

"Hey I kind of have to change my bandges now, thank you so much for bringing them to me."

I hugged him. He was so shocked I just knew he wasn't really seeing Sasuke anymore.

"You-You're welcome." He sputtered.

"Awe you're starting to sound like Hina-chan!" I Announced. "Too cute!" His whole face turned red and I wondered if all Hyuga were shy deep down.

What a silly thing to wonder.

"Anyway," I turned my back to him and began pulling my shirt up till he could probably see half of my back. "If you don't mind."

He ran. I grinned victoriously and shut the door after him. He was kind of easy to play and I only felt the tiniest bit bad about it. Not hard to ignore in the least. From there I made quick work of the injury I'd long become accustomed too. Though I kept my shirt on cuz, hello Sasuke in the room. Not that he looked. Every time I glanced his way he was staring determinedly at the wall.

I made an extra little fancy bow to wrap everything up and then found I could no longer stall for time. This was going to have to happen. I wish there was tea or something. What a pain.

"Alright then, Popsicle." I said clapping twice, he glared at me but I can't say I expected anything less. I did kidnap him after all. I crouched down in front of him preparing to remove the gag. "I'm gonna tell you some really really important stuff and I need you to take it seriously and um, not ask me how I know." I winced at how that sounded. Surely he was wondering why this couldn't be done at his house and I hoped he wouldn't ask before I could come up with something believable.

Carefully, I removed his gag and I exhaled when he didn't speak. He simply raised his clasped hands and presented them to me, obviously expecting me to undo that was well. I did so, going carefully through the complex knot I had worked so hard to tie in the first place. I tried hard not to let my hands linger, it was strange being so close to him. Actually touching Sasuke AND he was willing seemed like a novel experience. He was so pale, skinny wrists too, I noted. He looked soft but I had to draw a line somewhere or he'd think I was a fan girl and I really WAS going to have my way with him or something. I smirked at the idea. Soooo funny.

I sat back when I was finished and heard him exhale a breath I hadn't realized he'd been holding. He wasn't speaking still so I looked at him a bit more. His eyes were crazy dark, it didn't even seem right. When I began wondering if his eyelashes were longer then mine and how on earth I could find out, he finally spoke.

"Talk."

**AN: **Tada! I actually wanted to end it all the way when she first kidnapped him but my fingers wouldn't stop typing and I ended up here. I found a muse in VOLBEAT and I recommend the band to anyone with a writers block; the beat is fun to type too. I felt the same way about TATU way back when. For some reason music is essential to my writing prowess. ANY-LA-WHO! I love all of you MUCHO mhmmm that's what I said. Haha Please Review! It makes me feel good, and I promise to keep updating, just bare with me here ya'll I'm a working gal now. J


	17. Pov Change Pandemonium 14 part 2

**AN:** Welcome back everyone! It's been wild and it's not stopping anytime soon. Blizzard going on outside. They just played the some 'A Hundred and Ten in the Shade' which seems kind of obnoxious with the snow and what not. I'm going to what to write the counterpart 'Negative Five in the Sun.' What do you think? It'll be a hit right?

God in a super scary ass rolling car accident. Apparently it's a miracle that I'm still alive. Got to hand it to the Kia, it's totaled but I'm alive and that really fucking awesome.

Anyway! Thank you for coming this far with me guys. I finally got a laptop. It's bitchen huge, great for gaming, and I just purchased Microsoft on it so hopefully I can get on here and update slowly. Tourist season is kinda insane up here but it slows down in winter so that should help. I hope you guys like where I'm taking this story and I look forward to hearing about it from you!

By the by, I apologize for any bad spelling. ALSO brace yourself. Lots of pov changes in this one. Other then that.

Let's get this part started!

**Disclaimer:** I don't own lots of stuff, Naruto included.

**Chapter 14 part 2**

**Pov Change Pandemonium  
**

**(Boo fucking who you're not the only one whose life's a piece of shit, and yet miraculously somehow we all seem to deal with it)  
**

"Okay, so to recap; You're from another dimension."

She nodded.

"Right and you know -by means you won't clarify- that something bad -which you won't specify- is going to happen, unless you find a way to stop it."

She nodded again biting her lip in worry. He seemed to be taking it well, at least he hadn't called her a liar yet.

"And _even though _I have nothing to do with any of this you want _me_ to get involved."

It wasn't really a question but she nodded anyway.

Shikamaru grimaced when he realized that one of the worst shogi players he'd ever encountered had placed him in checkmate. He rubbed his forehead with an irritable sigh.

"Troublesome."

**-x-x-x-x-x-x-x- Sakura-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-**

"What do you mean you saw some girl carry off Sasuke-kun!" I fumed.

Ino and I had been in a perfectly normal shouting contest, which I was winning, when I had received the news.

"Oh no!" Ino gasped. "What if he's being forced to marry some evil tramp even as we speak!?"

My eyes widened at the thought but I tried my best to keep cool. I was a ninja after all. I had survived the battle at the bridge and solidified my resolution to become stronger. Dozens of things could have happened to Sasuke-kun. He'd never let his fan girls outwit him before. It could actually be a serious threat.

'Or a rumor,' I couldn't exclude that. 'Or a trap.' I couldn't exclude that either.

I kept trying to think but the picture kept flashing before my eyes. Sasuke marrying some faceless women with normal colored hair, perfect skin, and an exceptionally nicely shaped forehead!

"Sakura." Ino said and I faced her startled by the serious look on her face. "Sasuke-kun is in need of rescuing and I think you and I can do it." She exclaimed confidently.

For a moment I was overwhelmed by her sureness, a shy little girl once more overshadowed in the face of her conviction.

"And then, once we rescue him, Sasuke-kun will have no choice but to see what a magnificent catch I am and propose to me on the spot!" Ino announced. My jaw went slack as the visual hit me full force. Confident, talented, blonde, clan heiress _Ino_ and my Sasuke.

_Ino Uchiha Ino Uchiha Ino Uchiha _

Like a mantra driving me insane

_Ino Uchiha Ino Uchiha Ino Uchiha _

Them walking away together accompanied by her laughter, high pitched and victorious

_Ino Uchiha Ino uchiha Ino Uchiha _

"_Better luck next time, Forehead!"_

'_NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO'_

_**CHA! Don't just stand there!**_

"You wish Ino-PIG! Like Sasuke-kun would ever look twice at you!"

"Oh ya!" She responded, fists gripped and eyes on fire. "He deserves a break from looking at your big _FOREHEAD_ all the time!"

"Why you!"

**-x-x-x-x-x-x-Temari-x-x-x-x-x-x-x**

I honestly didn't see what the big deal was. This invasion was going to be cake. Like taking candy from a baby. May as well start practicing my victory laugh now. The civilians were frolicking about without a care in the world. Ninja were everywhere but they were easy to see and they were laughing. LAUGHING. Like cheerful little children not at all concerned about the fact that their village was teeming with foreign ninja.

I tried to be irritated by their unprofessional behavior but I could only come up with relieved; _Extremely_ relieved. What had I been so worried about? Worried about my village, my brothers… well…

'One must always worry about Gaara.' I reminded myself, glancing quickly once in his direction and then away. Gaara was an unstable menace, completely homicidal, the key to their take over and their ultimate victory… and yet-

I took another step closer to him, not daring to look again.

'He's still my brother." I thought protectively. Even if they weren't concerned about foreign ninja in their village I was still weary being anywhere that wasn't home. I took a moment to notice that Kankuro had moved a bit closer as well and took comfort in the fact that I wasn't the only one protective of Gaara.

'Still family.' I though defiantly. 'Still a team. Still the sand siblings. And…'

I couldn't look at Gaara without seeing Pandas.

It was obscene, completely unreasonable, and it was definitely going to get me killed. I wanted badly to offer Gaara a stick of bamboo and I was quite certain that such an urge had never struck me before.

'That stupid girl!' I seethed. Having seen the red eyed girl just this morning, her image came through rather clear.

_Hi Panda-chan. _I scoffed. The girl was lucky to be alive and I didn't know if I actually liked that lunatic or really REALLY hated her. Either extremely stupid or remarkably cheeky, the girl had caught Gaara's interest and was probably going to die very soon. Usually people who caught his interest died shortly after.

I swallowed softly.

"Hey!" My head shot up, knowing I was being addressed but baffled as to why. Before me stood a pretty blond girl I had never seen before brandishing a demanding finger in our general direction.

"That's right, you guys!" We stopped to stare. "Have you seen Sasuke-kun this morning?"

"What?" Kankuro said stupefied. It was hard to blame him, I only remembered the name because he had been such a cutie.

"Ya you know, Sasuke-kun. The total badass who showed you guys up the other day when you were picking on the Hokage's grandkid." She elaborated. I was suddenly aware of a vein throbbing in my temple.

"Ino knock it off, we're on the wrong side of town for this kind of thing. We should start closer to his home." The girl whose name I did not remember spoke up. She had pink hair and green eyes and was just farther proof that this take over was going to be cake. Pfft, pink hair. Honestly.

I pointed but they were too absorbed to notice. And then…

"Uchiha Sasuke is_ my _prey." Gaara said softly, but it was enough to shut them up. They stared at him in surprise, apparently smarter than to say anything. It was then that I made the mistake of looking at Gaara.

It wasn't immediate, it started out slow. The rings around his eyes darkened and he started to grow fuzzy little ears. I looked away again immediately, overwhelmed by the cuteness that should not have affected me so strongly.

"I don't know what you want that guy for, he's totally pathetic. Getting all tied up like that by a girl." Kankuro is a great ninja but sometimes he can be totally clueless. He didn't even realize his mistake either. So when he was jumped by both girls screeching and clawing at him. I didn't bother to help him. How else was he going to learn?

**x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-Kai-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-**

I tugged Yuzu around by her wrist looking frantically for the girl who had become my obsession. This was no easy feat mind you. Konoha was much bigger then I had expected and despite the days I'd already been here I hadn't exactly explored.

A flaw on my part, not easy to admit but I faced it lest it occur again.

At least it was easy to brush off in the face of my panic.

The steady thrum of silence was deafening in the back of my head, where I had become used to another presence. A warm little secret I'd kept all to myself. The gaping hole in her mind had just been so _convenient, _and it's not like _I _been the one who needed to stay on that bus. It wasn't particularly constant, I didn't have time for that, but it was _nice. _I could check on her anytime I wanted and make sure she hadn't killed herself again. I had pushed and pulled and irritated her before but this had never happened. Even when she was drugged up to her eyeballs I could still hear her. And now she'd shut me out.

I didn't know what was happening and it was driving me crazy.

Yukari had kidnapped Sasuke and they were alone somewhere in her room and I didn't trust the little punce to stay tied up. That was it. That was all I knew. Where exactly this room was, was another matter. One I really should have thought about sooner than now.

'It would have been easy.' I thought, irritably. 'I could have just shown her I was here and she would have told me where it was. She _trusts_ me.'

It was a humbling thought really, considering NO ONE in their right mind with all the facts would trust me even remotely.

'Which is why I'm not going to tell her.' I thought determinedly.

The shadows shifted sensing my irritation and I reached for that tight ball of self-control deep within me to forcibly calm myself. The response was immediate and intense. The cold calm washed into me compacting my panic from all sides and suspending it. It could not touch me now. From my peripheral vision I noticed the shadows slink away and I grimaced at how close that had been.

It would not do for them to see my attachment to Yukari. We had an agreement about Yuzu but Yukari was fair game and if they found a way to hurt me I knew they would take it. Pompous little things, these shadows who would seek to rob me of what is clearly mine. Cruel and Devious. But I was good at this game, I had been playing it a long time. Perhaps it was time for another demonstration.

I smirked.

That's when I noticed that Yuzu was no longer holding my hand.

My panic spiked again.

**-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-**

"Okay so now there's this guy, whose name you won't say, that needs protection from another guy, who you call Snake Face."

Kanoke nodded, pleased beyond all reason. This was going really really well. But what had she expected? The boy WAS a genius after all!

"Then there's this other guy who's after Yukari. You can tell me about him because it has 'nothing to do with anyone," He repeated verbatim, "his name is Kai but you call him-"

"The root of all evil." She finished for him. "He and Yukari have nothing to do with anybody so there's no harm in messing with that."

"Okay but 'Snake Face' and the guy we're not naming have something to do with somebody else?"

"Everybody else." She said decisively.

Shikarmaru pinched the bridge of his nose.

"Troublesome."

**-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-Temari-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-**

I thought maybe we should just spend the rest of our time indoors. Things were just getting too weird and Kankouro was nursing multiple injuries from the screaming harpies he had insulted earlier. He had been thoroughly mauled and he looked much less confident in the invasion than before. They must have hit him pretty hard.

There couldn't be much else to see, I decided. Lots of buildings, Lots of trees; that kind of bothered me. There's something comforting about the openness of the desert. Harsh though it may be, it was home and all this foliage was making me paranoid.

"Hi there!" Said a very cheerful voice. I had noticed her approach and I had hoped she would walk by. She'd chosen Gaara to address, which was insane and worrisome. The last thing we needed was Gaara killing off some poor civilian kid.

The child had blonde hair (I was starting to feel less special) and purple eyes. Red eyes, Purple eyes, Pink hair. Pfft this place was a freak show.

"Excuse me, but I was wondering if you had seen my Yukari-nee? My brother lost her and he's really worried!" She announced grinning cheerfully. Gaara stared at her for a moment as though hearing something I did not. I didn't like that. That's the look he'd had when we'd met Yukari and I did not like the coincidence.

Gaara raised his hand and I had a moment of panic. 'Here? In the middle of the village!? He can't!' But the fact was that he could and there wasn't anything I could do to stop him and to try would have been suicide.

Then to my shock and wonder… He pointed west. The direction we'd seen Yukari this morning.

_Hi Panda-chan_

I cringed and looked away again not ready to risk seeing more pandas in such a serious situation.

"Yuzu! What do you think you're doing!?" If I hadn't been so shocked already I might have actually taken notice of how good looking the guy coming toward us was.

"Brother!" Yuzu announced, not giving him a chance to yell. "These people have seen Yukari!"

The boy stopped short eyeing us up with his also absurdly purple eyes. When his eyes stopped on Gaara and did not leave immediately I was back to being very worried.

"You looking for the psycho kidnapper with the red eyes?" I asked quickly, trying to draw his attention away. It worked, however when his eyes snapped to mine I was not ready for the fullness of his attention. It was almost suffocating, which was ridiculous. I was a Ninja of Suna. I straightened my spine and set my jaw. He smiled at me in apparent elation.

"That's my Yukari!" He had perfect teeth, I noticed.

"She went that way." I announced pointing west.

"Thank you." He said smoothly. He grabbed the child by the wrist and she waved amiably at us while leaving.

"Thank you for all your help! You guys are really good people!" She yelled.

I cringed.

"That's it." I grumbled. Kankuro turned to look at me and I was already walking back the way we'd come.

"Where're you going Temari?!" He called.

"I'm going back to our room and I'm gonna stay there till the exams!" I shouted back. I'd had enough of this freak show.

"_Thank you for all your help! You guys are really good people!" _

I cringed again.

**-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-**

_Her mouth parted in wanton need, the aphrodisiac having taken full affect. How was he to resist this woman before him? But he must, he had to know who had drugged her. Enemies weren't far off…_

"_Help me." she cried breathlessly. She pressed her body to his, chest flushed in her arousal, frustration evident in the furrow between her lovely brows. Then she was kissing his throat and he had lost the ability to think as the blood rushed to his libido. Sliding over him she sat and pressed her hot core to his throbbing crotch, moaning his name loudly as he kissed her with bruising force-_

"Hi Sensei!"

Kakashi blinked slowly and rose his head to see the exuberant blonde in front of him. Naruto was a good kid but he had terrible timing. Not that Kakashi had been so into the fantastic book before him that he wouldn't have noticed a threat; apparently his students didn't count.

"Hello Naruto, what are you up to today?" He responded politely, aloof for the most part but resisting the urge to continue reading all the same.

"Heading off to get some ramen!" He exclaimed, his whole body going into the explanation. A little too expressive for a ninja, most would say.

'But then, Guy has been around longer than most as well.' He mused, giving his signature eye smile.

"You can come if you want, Kakashi-sensei! I _was _hoping to see Sakura-chan this morning and invite her there but…" His disappointment was evident, even with his eyes closed in that smile that did not falter.

"Sorry Naruto, I haven't seen her." Which was mostly true with the exception that he took tabs on all of his students every morning… just in case…

"KAKASHI-SENSEI!" He blinked again resisting a grin as Sakura appeared on the road. It was somewhat bothersome that she had just appeared without warning but it was not an unknown phenomena in most fan girls as Kakashi had realized when he was a boy.

"Hey Sakura-chan!" Naruto shouted, seeming to shine a little extra orange than usual; his hair a little more yellow too. That was… really interesting.

Sakura ignored Naruto easily which spoke foreboding things about their teamwork skills. Hopefully they'd figure out their places in the exam. And Yukari…

Kakashi didn't let his face change as his thoughts took him to what he'd done. He'd done a lot of pretty horrible things as a ninja. Killed some people he'd rather not have. Made some sacrifices that probably shouldn't have happened. Failed certain people… Yukari's devastation was palpable and he realized this morning when they spoke that she really had not forgiven him. A sensei is never comfortable with a student that doesn't trust him. Even if what brought all this on was, without question, the right decision. Better mistrust him and be alive then trust him and be dead, as had almost happened once already. He reminded himself that constantly and it kept the guilt at bay.

"Kakashi-sensei have you seen Sasuke!?" Sakura demanded, something a little more urgent in the question than usual. He was immediately alert.

"Awe Sakura-chan, who needs him?! He's probably brooding in a corner or something." Naruto pouted, Sakura whacked him over the head like a habit.

"No you idiot! Sasuke-kun's been kidnapped!" She exclaimed.

Kakashi blinked slowly as Naruto's entire demeanor changed. That determined look made his eyes a little more blue, his whisker scars a little more pronounced. The Jonin took note of that as well. Very strange.

"Well then we have to save him!" He shouted.

The Yamanaka girl gave Naruto an appraising look, as though having never seen him before.

Then she nodded tightly. "Welcome to the team Naruto, we can use all the help we can get."

His eyes widened and shutters Kakashi had not noticed there before lifted at once.

"Ino, what the hell?!" Sakura shouted, convinced that Naruto would only be in the way.

"Shut up Forehead! Sasuke-kun may not be that important to you but he is to me! If Naruto can help us I say let him!" Ino declared moving closer and in front of Naruto in a natural defensive gesture that Kakashi had not been expecting at all. It seemed Ino's team had been a good influence on her.

'InoShikaCho has always had infamous teamwork.' He though wistfully, feeling again like he'd gotten cheated on teams. He smiled, seeing an opportunity for some unexpected training.

"Come to think of it, I saw someone taking him to the Hyuga Compound this morning." All argument immediately ceased at the quiet sentence.

And then Ino and Sakura's eyes were on _fire. _Any hostility toward one another forgotten by the revelation.

"Some Hyuga bitch got _my_ Sasuke-kun!" Ino declared.

"That clan is always looking for ways to better itself. Well they can't have _my_ Sasuke-kun!" Sakura joined.

"Let's rescue him first and then we can decide who he belongs to okay!" Naruto piped up. Everything stopped for a moment, everyone present stunned and impressed that this mature comment had come out of Naruto's mouth.

And then they were gone. Kakashi waved as his cute students and their friend set off to rescue his other cute student from his even cuter student. With a little bit of luck, the Hyuga residents wouldn't take it too badly when they burst in.

What an interesting morning this was turning out to be.

**-x-x-x-x-x-x-Yukari-x-x-x-x-x-x-**

I had a pile of bad idea's to choose from.

'So Sasuke, I'm from another dimension but I know everything that's going to happen…' Let's just throw that one away right now. I couldn't even attempt to predict how THAT would go over.

'So Sasuke, your brother is totally innocent and your quest for power is stupid.' Who boy let's just explode his head while we're here.

'Sasuke, I know where you can get power let's go on en epic road trip with the Hokage's permission!' Probably my dumbest idea to date.

I'd thought about leaving the village and hoping they bonded in their search to come after me. Maybe Sasuke would learn a thing or two about how much they cared. But the problem with THAT idea left me just as stranded and floundering as before. Plus hunter-nin. Never a good thing.

Okay, so no long term plans yet. What did that leave me with?

I stood and began to pace, completely unable to face Sasuke at the moment.

Orochimaru was the most immediate threat. I needed to warn him about that before anything.

"So there's this guy," I winced hating how I'd started already. "Er, this fanguy really. Think Vampire." I turned to look at Sasuke expecting him to blow me off. He was silent, his expression gave nothing away. I'd almost rather see disbelief so that I'd have some direction to start in. Nothing.

"This really freaking strong sadistic ninja vampire fanguy." Still no reaction. "With lots of snakes and and - Pedophile! Yeah that'll do. There's this Pedophile! And he's going to come after you during these exams. He's one of the strongest people in the world and there's not a single ninja in this village who can stop him. But he's EVIL and he ruins everything he touches and kills everything in his way. He's also INSANE and he has this thing where he binds people to him and tricks them into turning against everything they've ever loved. Now he wants your body and as much as I'd like to keep you holed up in here till we can get rid of him, the voice in my head has so kindly pointed out that it's impossible. He'll offer you everything you've ever wanted and I just can't take going through that again!" I threw that last line out there hoping to give my story some credibility. It would raise more questions than it answered undoubtedly but it still remained the truth. Now that I knew Sasuke, liked him even, how could I give him up to Orochimaru?

I frowned wondering if, maybe, I'd broken Sasuke when I dropped him earlier. Come to think of it, had he spoken since I'd first gagged him…? I should have actually planned this speech instead of practicing tying knots…

Though that_ had_ been extremely helpful in getting him in front of me.

Usually after ranting I could march off and leave people to think on what I'd said. Not this time, no way. I had to know he was taking me seriously.

Also this was definitely where I slept and I'm not sure where I'd retreat to or how long I'd have to wait to come back. That wouldn't do, I had a party to go to.

"I know you must think I sound crazy," I started slowly, paying close attention to his unresponsive face, "but I'm telling you, I've seen what this guy does to people. He's so crazy powerful and he's going to come for you. I need you to understand." Maybe it wasn't the best idea to stress how powerful Orochimaru was to someone so power hungry himself, but I didn't want Sasuke underestimating this threat. I knelt down putting my hands on his knees and looking him directly in the eyes, hoping to see something, anything.

"Oh I understand." He whispered and I felt my hope grow. He wasn't calling me crazy! This could actually work. "You don't trust me." Is what he finally said and the sentence alone struck me dumb.

"What?" I asked, shaking my head and feeling my mouth go dry.

Not 'how do you know this?'

or 'you're obviously insane, Irenara I'll drop you off the nearest hospital,'

or the one I'd really been hoping for but not expecting, 'How can we prevent this?'

Shit I'd even take a 'thanks for the head up.'

Of all the stupid things…

"You don't trust me to say no to this guy. You think I'll betray my village. That he'll offer me power and I'll just fallow him blindly like some idiot."

But that was exactly what he was going to do! Why did he get to sound all offended and such!?

He was getting all worked up. That flashing in his eyes was no good for my situation and he'd jerked my hands right off his knees like the contact was unbearable. I knew where this was going. We'd danced this dance before and yes I had trust issues and of course he had trust issues but that wasn't what this was about and I could not let this continue. It was too important. If this was to be the fight for Sasuke's soul I wasn't going to start off on the loosing team.

I shoved him hard into the wall and his startled expression broke through his rage rather effectively.

"I have a stupid sign on my forehead, is that it?!" I seethed. "I try to warn you because I'm concerned and there you go making a damn issue out of this. Well fuck you. I'm CONCERED you jackass! I know that must be some kind of foreign experience for you but suck it up and at least recognize it for what it is!"

He opened his mouth to speak but I would have none of it. I shoved him again and used the momentum to stand. My hands flexed in the air around my face trying to convey my frustration.

"If I didn't trust you I wouldn't have brought you here and told you this, you fucking moron! I'd have gone to the Scarecrow or the Hokage. It doesn't matter how much you trust someone where this guy is involved! This guy gets what he wants. If it had been Kanoke, she'd be here instead of you right now and I probably would have left her tied up! You're the one in danger! You're the one I'm sticking my neck out for! And I'm not going to let him have you whether you agree with me or not!" I stopped abruptly, a hair surprised to find myself so out of breath.

Turns out a good deal of my anger wasn't faked.

I scowled. "I'm so mad I could kick you!" I thought about it. Was seriously considering it when I noticed the smirk on Sasuke's face.

"What are you smirking at, you prat? I think I just took years off my life yelling at you." I grumbled, scratching irritably at my cheek.

"You worry too much, Irenara." Sasuke said.

I opened my mouth to scream.

"SASUKE-KUN!"

I blinked, deeply confused. That better not have come out of my mouth.

Sasuke gave me a funny look, not seeming the least bit angry anymore. Which was good except, you know, I didn't think any of what I said actually got through.

Obviously I was just going to have to tie him up again.

And then suddenly, the world was caving in on my room. With a loud ripping noise two screeching harpies fell through my rice paper door and tumbled in a heap before us. One of them had pink hair.

I blinked slowly as everything froze… and then sped up to double time. Clawing at each other manically the two girls scrambled across the floor with bared teeth and evil slanted eyes.

If Sasuke hadn't stepped forward, I very well could have been mobbed.

The walls turned bright pink and hearts burst out around me. I stuck out a brave finger and watched in wonder as the bubble heart popped. Glowing and significantly more recognizable, Ino and Sakura fawned over their Uchiha survivor.

I paled, inching away as slowly as possible. I might have wondered how they'd found him, but I hadn't exactly been discreet and I had more pressing issues, at the moment. Sakura and Ino had ripped down one of my walls to rescue Sasuke. If they didn't do it first than Haishi was going to murder me.

"Sasuke-kuuuuuun! I'm so glad you're okay!" Sakura shouted.

"Ohhh Sasuke-kuuuun, I came to rescue you from that harlot." Ino insisted.

"I came to rescue you too." Sakura said, shoving Ino harshly.

"What the hell forehead!?"

"Shut up pig!"

Sakura had grown on me at some point and I had started wondering why I'd hated her so much in the beginning. Now the answer stood before me and I felt ashamed for women everywhere. Clearly Ino and Sakura did not bring out the best in each other. Although those two were scarier than Orochimaru himself. Well… at least it barred comparison.

"Hi Angel-chan!" I blinked at the bright ball of orange that was Naruto. It was hard to believe that he'd taken no part in the destruction that had ensued. "I guess Sasuke-teme belongs to you, eh?"

I gaped in horror. Why oh why would Naruto do this to me?

I felt a foreboding chill race through my body as the eyes of two demons fixed on me.

"Yukari," Sakura looked insane, "I know you wouldn't do something like kidnap and marry Sasuke-kun because you're smarter than that and you value your life."

"That's true," Ino joined in and I felt myself visibly shrink back. "But you better tell us what you two were doing here because we wouldn't want there to be any misunderstandings."

"Right!" Sakura smiled. Why could I see all her teeth? "Nobody wants a misunderstanding."

"Or an accidental death." Ino added.

"Oh you know," I started, trying to smile while simultaneously using my foot to shove Summer's Storm in front of me. He was cute, he'd be fine. He wasn't paying attention anyway, which was a damn shame because my life was in danger and all he could do was stare at my door like it had offended him. "I was just helping him prep for the chunin exam. Important stuff… prepping… for the chunin… exam."

They seemed to mull this over for a minute. They could probably smell lies… it couldn't technically be called a lie… could it?

"So wait… you weren't kidnapping him to marry him?"

I didn't notice who had asked, so baffling was the question itself. Distantly I heard Sasuke trip on his way over to the door. I was dazed.

"Of course not!" He answered for me.

"That's a real relief!" Naruto shouted. "These two were so worried about you Sasuke-teme, only my awesome reasoning skills got us here to save you." He continued, index finger in his ear going after lingering wax… or something. "Hinata-chan let us in right away." He blinked looking around. "Come to think of it… where did she go?"

"Move it, Moron." Sasuke growled, determined to leave. Attention was off me for the moment and I was scrutinizing my chances of escaping through the window.

**-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-Sasuke-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-**

Naturally I had been ignoring Ino and Sakura since almost nothing they ever said had any worth. When they'd notice me heading for the door they'd skillfully intercepted my path. While they were simply reprimanding Naruto at the moment they were blocking the way out most effectively.

I couldn't bring myself to look back at Yukari. Yukari who had been a mystery from the beginning. Yukari who had the disquieting eyes of my brother. Yukari who didn't seem to think I could take care of myself. Yukari who kidnapped me in a misguided attempt to rescue me. Yukari who might trust me after all…

I was finally getting somewhere with this mystery. I had more questions than before but somehow I knew I had gotten farther. I had no doubt that the threat she spoke of was real and I had a few theories on how she knew it was coming.

_You are a clan heir, the last in fact…_

Her family was gone. That much was clear to me, one way or the other. I didn't know where she had been before Konoha but if we were the most peaceful village then I had a pretty safe bet it was worse than here. Particularly if those wounds were anything to go by. She seemed to know strange people. She had ties I couldn't hope to identify and a stream of information that was a smidge alarming. But she was _alone_ and I should have guessed it by how attached she'd become to us all. And this man who was coming for me, I had reason to believe he had taken her family from her as well. Perhaps he even fallowed her here.

_He wants your body_

What the hell did that even mean?

Still I felt happy, excited even.

Let him come then! I would not be the same as her family. I would not fall prey to this man's devices and promises. And hell I was an avenger, born to get stronger and kill Itachi. If this man was so powerful perhaps along the way I'd kill him too. That would make Yukari happy.

Even in my deep thought I was aware the moment he stepped through the door.

He entered the room smirking like a jackass and carrying the biggest most stupid look bundle of daisies I've ever seen. I clenched my fist so hard that my knuckles turned white.

"Yukari-chan!" Kia sang, stepping through the disaster that was the doorway.

I wanted to attack him. That seemed a little strange. Obviously I didn't like the prat but there were lots of things and people I didn't like that I also didn't feel the need to attack.

"Sorry you just missed her." Naruto announced. What was that idiot up to? Clearly Yukari was…

I turned to look at her for the first time since her dramatic speech and the arrival of my persistent fans.

Except she wasn't there.

I eyed the red lines that flashed in and out of the area she'd just been in wondering on their creation. They'd always showed up when things went missing. That seemed awfully suspicious, how had I never questioned it before.

**-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-Yukari-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-**

If someone had mentioned that it was even possible to fall on top of a Hyuga, I probably wouldn't have believed them. I say probably because the thought hadn't even occurred to me personally. The whole bloodline thing combined with the impossible image of incompetence that comes with being fallen on just didn't click.

If someone had even implied that I would fall on top of Hyuga Neji I would have saved that particular mental image for a rainy day, that I might take it out and laugh at the impossibility.

I suppose the real thing would have to do just as well.

I blinked in astonishment. I must have slipped… That was... insane. I never slip in this body. I'd gotten over heights because of it.

Having escaped my room rather skillfully I had been sprinting along the wall that surrounded the compound. And then… I guess I slipped?

I looked up and up; becoming nauseous at the thought that I had fallen so far. I looked at the back I was sitting on and scrutinized the long brown hair and the pained expression feeling hysterical laughter bubble past my lips.

That was, of course, before I was bodily thrown.

I snapped out with my legs twisting in the air and my palm to the ground to pivot.

He was in a ready stance by the time I'd gained my footing, bloodline in full swing which was a lot less funny. Training with Hinata could not have prepared me for his speed and the only reason I was able to dodge him was because I had been expecting it. I jumped to distance myself awkwardly using chakra to stick to the side of the compound wall.

"Chillax, yo." I said pulling my hair to the side so I could see and then putting my hands out to show harmlessness. He stared at me with hard eyes, his expression unrelenting. I had never really liked Neji after what he had done to Hinata though I'd shipped the TentenxNeji pairing after Naruto beat sense into him. But looking at him now all that I could see was spiders and blind spots and that one famous picture of him looking towards the sun after the battle.

"You will explain why you attacked me." He said coldly. Which totally ruined the image but did not stop my longing to purchase a Neji Plushie.

"Psh I didn't attack you. If I had there would have been rope… and probably a camera." I answered. It occurred to me that he might have a crazy enough fan base for those words to have been inappropriate. There was no recondition there when I checked so I figured I was safe.

"You are the guest at the Main House." He stated and lowered his hands like it caused him physical pain. "The Irenara Heiress. Born lucky and talented."

What a dick!

"That makes you the prodigy that was lucky to be born?" I'm pretty sure Zuko had mentioned that in Avatar. "You got any burns or secret royal heritage you wanna share while we're here? You have to be one of the worst ninja I've ever heard of." I said fondly, because I used to have a Zuko plushie. What's not to love?

He stood ramrod straight at that looking up at me with his jaw clenched, pale eyes blank but for fury.

"Excuse me, but-"

"Oh you're excused! We're obviously not going to get along till you get hit in the face with a life changing jutsu a buddy of mine has." I continued. "But I promise to like you until then anyway. I'm super nice like that. It's not your fault you completely fail to incorporate the ninja rule 'look underneath the underneath."

"So," I flipped down to land by him and if I thought it was physically possible I'd say he tensed even _more, _But It's not possible, so it couldn't be. "What are we doing today, pal?"

"I am not your pal." He bit out turning away.

I grinned. "I'm not your buddy, pal!" I said in a cartoony voice. "We should buy a fedora."

**-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-**

One of the biggest pains about being a genius is that when no immediate solution presents itself then you've got a particularly troublesome problem on hand.

Shikamaru had always wanted a relatively normal life. Having been born into a shinobi family this was not an easy want. But his parents were still alive and together and unfailing loyal to their village and that was nice. He was a Genin now, like the rest of the children his age, even if his intellect placed him well above most Chunin and no small amount of Jonin. He slept as often as possible to make up for the ball of action his life was otherwise. He was a part of Ino-Shika-Cho like his father before him and they worked well together. He had gotten his earring upon graduation as was tradition. It was as normal a life as any young genius shinobi could hope for.

Hanram Kanoke was not normal.

Not even close.

It wasn't that the girl was strange per say, even if she was obscenely happy for someone who averaged 6.2 hours of sleep in a cycle. Her hair was purple and her eyes were pink. That was rather strange. Incidentally, it had only taken Shikamaru a short amount of research to ensure that this was not unheard of altogether, particularly if her original claims that she came from Kumo proved true.

Kanoke always had something bothering her. Now that wasn't strange at all, not in a shinobi village.

Living with her had been tiresome as she had an uncanny ability to locate him at almost all times. A gift that was fed by his mother no doubt, who loved having a way to fetch him if needed. It had also made it impossible for him to ignore all of the signs.

Kanoke _saw _things, he was almost positive. She didn't like mirrors, didn't even like water. She was skittish and twitchy, like the Nara deer; Privy to things he didn't understand. Kanoke _knew _things, things she couldn't possibly know. Things about the deer and the Nara family shadows. She knew things about his family jutsu that he hadn't even learned yet. She made references to things that were going to happen like it was inevitable. Like it had all been written down somewhere and she'd read that book already.

That wasn't the only book she'd read though.

She complained about missing things. She spoke of a technology so advanced that there was no way he wouldn't have heard of it. Of other beings like space cowboy bounty hunters and men that were wolves, feudal era demons who hunted jewel shards and men who fought with nose hair.

Kanoke did not like to read but somewhere she'd found one hell of a story teller.

She was terrible at lying. She had about six tells that Shikamaru was able to pick out immediately. She liked and disliked lots of things and was extremely vocal about it.

What was really strange though?

He was pretty sure she didn't have chakra.

That was _impossible._

So when she came to him and mentioned that she was from another dimension it was terribly disturbing how much sense that made.

Shikamaru was no interrogator but he was pretty sure she wasn't lying. There were so many things wrong with this situation he actually wasn't sure where to begin and he mused a bit bitterly on whether that had happened to him before or not. She had brought him in on this in utter confidence, positive that he could help. But it was all so vague. He didn't care for vague. Vague was hard to plan for and if he was going to get involved –not that he seemed to have a choice in the matter- they dearly needed a plan

This was decidedly the most not normal thing to ever happen to him.

Shikamaru was a genius.

He had no idea what to do.

"Father." He said, finally speaking to the man who had been watching him for the last twenty minutes anyway. "I need some advice."

**-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-Kai-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-**

Quite a lot had gone on since I started my search that morning, I decided fighting the urge to snarl.

The Uchiha brat was openly scowling at me and I would have loved to return the favor. Instead I smiled at him because I knew he would hate it. My smile said, 'silly child, you are nothing. However, I'll endure your presence because I'm simply that magnanimous.'

Ya, it said all that.

His glares were baby words in comparison. 'I'll kill you.' Or something equaling uninteresting and ineloquent.

"So what are you doing in town, Kai-kun?" Sakura started, hoping to break through the oppressive silence. She didn't seem to know why it was so oppressive but it most certainly was. I knew it could only be from the animosity between Uchiha and myself. We were officially a Yukari search party, though why Sasuke insisted on being here I could not say.

"Yes, what exactly are you doing in Konoha?" Sasuke grit out. I laughed because that was fine, it fit the mood and if asked I could lie and say I wasn't laughing _at_ Sasuke.

"We came to see Yukari!" Yuzu announced shaking her blonde pig tails in glee. I knew my little sister was adorable but it was nice to see other people recognizing it as well. Sakura seemed to think Yuzu was the cutest thing on the planet. My opinion of her improved dramatically.

The canine however…

Yukari's dog didn't like me. I'd tried to pet him earlier and he made a pretty impressive go at my fingers. Oh Sasuke and that damn animal got along well and good, which just proved that there were brain cells lacking all around. Still I didn't much care for the feeling.

I tried to kick the little beast while no one was looking. Pity he was rather quick on his paws.

"Yes," I started, feeling the need to join in. "It was so good to see Yukari again we simply couldn't bare to be parted from her any longer."

"Aweeee," Sakura squealed and I winced. "That's so amazing! You and Yukari are just the cutest couple!"

"Hmmmm," I hummed, intending to leave that remark there to build its own credibility. Yukari was, after all, mine. If a relationship would keep others from tampering with that then all the better.

That's when the damn bastard got me.

Pain shot up my leg as his jaws clamped down. I inhaled deeply through my nose and counted back from 3. That was the only time I would allow myself.

"Bad doggie!" Yuzu shouted, waving her hands around in distress. "Let go of my brother, right now!

Do not maim Yukari's s dog, do not maim Yukari's dog, do not maim Yukari's dog.

I gave an easy smile and tried to just… shake my leg a bit.

I was rewards with a strange kind of warble and a lot more pain. I hadn't been expecting it to work, still… It would have been nice.

"Come on now, Cloud or Rain or whatever the hell your name is." I coaxed, taking my want to scowl and shoving it deep deep down to that place where darkness suspended emotion. The beast glared up at me, completely unyielding.

Do not kill Yukari's dog, do not kill Yukari's dog, do not kill Yukari's dog.

"What are you smirking about?" I shot at the Uchiha, not even bothering to look. If that brat wasn't smirking I'd eat my left foot.

**-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-Yukari-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-**

"Why are you fallowing me?" He grit out.

I grinned. This was so fun. It was like meeting Sasuke all over again without all the obnoxious questions and the pressure to save the world.

"Because I have nothing better to do at the moment." I admitted. I couldn't go back to my room, who knew how long those crazy people would stay there? "You rocking the Chunin exams this year?"

I looked closely at him when he took too long to respond. I was struck by the sudden knowledge that he was literally trying to decide whether or not to run for it. Frankly I wasn't sure why he hadn't attacked me.

"So why haven't you attacked me yet?" My question made him stop for a moment though he hadn't made eye contact since we met and he still didn't now.

"You are the guest at the main house." He repeated. "Born lucky and talented. That is your fate and your place whether you acknowledge it or not."

So wow, didn't see that coming. Neji actually held me in higher regard then I expected. I knew he had a fate kick and was always snarling at Naruto for being a nameless looser but for some reason I had not expected this to go both ways. I guess I was a winner… even if it did sound like an insult coming from him.

"Well you could marry the awesome me and maybe some of my badassness would rub off on you." I said, which made complete sense. Not that I was offering or anything. Cuz… dear god no. Definitely not offering.

He paused and finally looked at me. His clear eyes bore into my own and for the life of me I couldn't tell what he was thinking. One thin eyebrow rose and I quirked my own in return. I had never before been so grateful that I'd spent my childhood holding one eyebrow down just to master this skill.

Then he turned away and scoffed.

Literally scoffed.

That seemed kinda rude. Eh, I shrugged and ran a short ways to catch up to him. I ship NejixTenten so hardcore it was hard to be upset. Even if he was pretty.

"So white eyes, party at the compound tonight! You coming?" I grinned again. My face was starting to hurt.

"No"

"What? What the hell? Why not?"

"Invitation only." He spat.

"Well that's lame. I don't see why I should have to suffer through this formal bullshit and you don't have to." I scowled. If Hyuga's prodigy wasn't going to be there then who the hell was? The party was for Hinata so I probably wouldn't be able to bug her all night long. If I didn't know anyone else there I was going to be really bored.

"I guess I'll just have to make new friends." I tossed him a smile. "Who could resist this charming personality?"

The look he gave me was so doubtful it was practically a physical blow. I had never really had a problem with self-esteem. Sometimes I bitch and moan but mostly I'm pretty confident. Good thing too.

"Geez, careful with the looks there pal. If I had any self-esteem issues I'd be pretty broken up right about now."

He scoffed again.

"I'm not your pal."

That back my grin back pretty fast. Sheesh, Neji was such a jackass.

"I'm not your buddy, pal." I mimicked. "So about that fedora…"

**x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x**-

"Kanoke." Formalities aside, they had a lot to talk about. She turned to him with faith in her eyes, relief in her movements, and hope bubbling at the surface.

Shikamaru would know what to do.

Shikamaru would help.

It was so good to know that she would be of assistance to Yukari. Finally she could help.

Shikamaru was a genius, he'd have a plan.

He had to have a plan.

He nodded softly and settled before the shogi board.

They started the game in silence and played till his troubled expression cleared. It was good that she had been able to tell him. She wasn't sure why she had been so worried. He'd always been one of her favorite characters. Always so calm and brilliant. Maybe this time around she could stop him from smoking too.

Finally once it became painfully obvious that Shikamaru was decimating the board he spoke.

"I have a plan."

**AN**: SO cliff hangers and anticlimacticness aside. What did you think? I really hope it wasn't too confusing with all of the pov. Changes and the scene jumping. If you read closely you can really tell that I wrote this in small installments when I had time and ambition. That probably helps account for the choppiness, even if it's not a great excuse. Finally we met Neji whose gonna be fun to play with. He reminds me of a friend I have who's a total jackass but I love him anyway because he's hysterical with the cynicism.

I'm a huge Temari fan. Teehee Temari… Fan… and now Panda's. For all you Gaara fans out there, don't worry, he's coming.

ALSO big important moment for Sasuke in this one. Did you catch it? It was short in between all the speech-tastic moments.

And yes, eventually we're going to learn what Kai said to Kanoke that set all this awesome planning into motion. Gotta love Shikamaru.

Anyway I don't know who's ending up with who yet. Nothing romantic going on at the moment. Probably eventual SasuXOc but nothing set in stone and they're all just sooooo young at the moment.

And of course, next time. PARTY YO!

But I digress/

Halloween is coming people. I can't wait to go to the bar and see all the freaks walking around. I'm rocking the mafia costume this year. I got a squirt gun full of whiskey with my name on it. Seems like a waste but it was totally necessary. HAPPY HALLOWEEN EVERYONE!

And you know, If you find time, PLEASE REVIEW. It's been really encouraging my updates since every one I get is like, 'Hey Rosie, maybe get off your ass and update. Make some people happy, why don't you.' I could pin certain reviews to certain parts of this story to mark when I wrote it. LOVE!

–Lace


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